SELECTION - 3 Kinds of Men Long Term Relationship

  • View author's info Posted on Apr 09, 2010 at 02:04 PM

    I've had nice long run in southern california.  And learned a lot from my friends's relaitionships over time.  WHO did they select among their choices... and what eventally happenened?  A LOT of surprises...but at the end of the day there were DEFINATELY some patterns...

    Women have more choices than they think!  Very attractive women in particular... but information on how to USE those choices is often contradictory or situational... so here are some observations...

    Men fall into 3 groups and rarely move between them, which is the helpful point for females...1. Traders 2. Bonders 3. Partners.   The groups are also about the same size although not in all demographics.

    Traders are the guys that would trade two 5s for a 10.  Hence the name.  They trade three 3's for a nine.  hugh grant left a 10 to go hunt down a 3.  They just dont care about quality of the is sex to them.


    Bonders - They have such a drive to bond with someone that they tend to go 1 date, 2 dates, relationship.  They never go on a date with one girl then another girl then back to the first.  This may sound appealing to women, but they present a big risk of breaking up later.  They have a murkey idea of what they are looking for.  And since they jump into relationships, they havent looked at evenness or compatibility before its a relationship.  But those things matter later.  So they dump the girl and find another.  They would never cheat at least in their mind... they just break up and move on.  They appear to be the opposite of Traders but really they arent because they dont put a lot of thought into the quality of the match.


    Partners - Partners get into relationships more slowly than bonders.  They are looking for the best possibly match they can get, just like we do in business.  We want both evenness and compatibility with our partnerships and friendships so why not our relationships?


    The good news is that men are pretty bad at hiding which type they are.  The bad news is that no one bothered to tell most females they have a choice.  So why not just point out that you have a choice, no one is forcing you or trying to trick you.  You can choose to have an alligator or a golden retriever for a pet.  But dont be surprised if the alligator is more likely to bite off your hand...;-)

    Just watch what the men you know do over time.  Their actions will SCREAM which group they are in before you know it...
  • 37Comments

  • View author's info Posted on Jul 26, 2011 at 12:28 PM

    no doubt!
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 25, 2011 at 04:55 PM

  • View author's info Posted on Jul 17, 2011 at 11:09 PM


    On closer inspection I was LMAO, points for you.
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 17, 2011 at 03:18 PM

    just like my friend here in the picture see if u get this its kinda like now u seem .. now u dont.. but in reverse

  • View author's info Posted on Jul 16, 2011 at 05:21 PM

    So true!!..Very intriguing & thoughtful!! :-)
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 15, 2011 at 06:04 PM

    I like these categories and I think that it is useful to remind people that it doesn't take a lifetime to discover what a person is really like. Most people broadcast their intentions even when they don't mean to and initial observations are usually correct.

    Its also true that many of us have probably fallen into the different categories at different stages in our lives. For me, I started out a "trader" in high school, moved on to be a "bonder" in my early twenties, and now am a "partner." All that really means, however, is that I grew up and matured into an adult.
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 03, 2011 at 05:01 AM

    Yeah... I agree for both,men or woman give them time you will see who they realy wishes to all.

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  • View author's info Posted on Jun 30, 2011 at 10:27 PM

    Thank you so much Mr. MagicTouch :-)I really needed to know this. I love how you broke it down I never thought of it this way, you opened my eyes and my mind up even more. I pray that you find a partner just for you; if you already haven't. Your going to make some women very happy soon. You have a honest heart! Be blessed....
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 25, 2011 at 01:36 PM

    Hi, it was great to read this messages and to learn how a man feels regarding dates, other men etc. Hope we all will find the right type of partner and be careful what you wish, you might just get it!
    Sweet dreams and nice greetings from Vienna,
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 27, 2011 at 02:50 PM

    where is my Partner?
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 21, 2011 at 08:18 AM

    It's nice to see a guy telling it like it is and saying it without being judgemental or disrespectful! I agree with you 100% which leads me to ask why you havent already been swept off your feet. May you find what your looking for because you deserve it
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 17, 2011 at 05:43 PM

    I agree with this categorization. I've known all three types. Woman are in those categories as well.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 02, 2011 at 02:09 AM

    Quoting author:

    What group  do you belong to ?

    i was wondering the same :)
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 07, 2011 at 10:04 AM

    I agree that there are different types of men just as there are different types of women. I agree that each sex has choices and should have preferences or expectations for the ideal mate.

    What I don't understand is why men and women keep finding the same type of people who do not match with them.

    Instead of Categorizing men or women why not just find a date who makes you feel good, brings out your best traits and character and treats you with VALUE.
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 25, 2010 at 09:39 PM

    Ha! this was fantastic. It is totally true what you are saying and you have such a good perception, and yes,  they can be so easy to spot knowing this, especially when one is attractive and have attracted some of these, and have a greater choise, and some IQ to think with, but I think there are also  some variations on these three groups - since people are not the same but differ so much from each other, but these three patterns deffinitely do exist - and as you say - women should be more aware and make more choise and not just fall for the first one coming along, or just take the first they can get, because when in a relationship, the right one is prevented from coming along. We should be much more selective and know our value. The ones who don´t know will fall for the wrong one, and according to a research made that I just heard of - more married people are unhappy than singles??
    Your advice that we women have more choises than we think is a good one. We can just look and learn.

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  • View author's info Posted on Dec 02, 2010 at 06:44 PM

    This is a very simplistic overview... but let's assume that these three categories are the only ones we are considering.....

    The big hole in your hypothosis is that you have not considered Darwinism and the theory of evolution....

    "Traders" evolve into "bonders" who evolve into "partners".....

    you are telling us that there are three categories, when in truth it is three stages... and all the grey in between.... and in the end, the rules of "the survival of the fitest" will be applied, and "the partners" will be victorious in selecting the creme de la creme... after all .. the race must go on...





  • View author's info Posted on Nov 27, 2010 at 03:08 PM

    very interesting
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 17, 2010 at 01:13 AM

    I concur
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 07, 2010 at 07:56 PM

    From my experience, It is true if a man wants to jump to quickly into a relationship , red flags pop up. Time tells all, watch and listen. Show me do not tell me... Men and women can't hide their true intentions for too long. More importantly , listen to your instincts!