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Posted on Jun 26, 2018 at 05:54 PM

Is there a new guest etiquette I am unaware of?

 

I invited some friends for dinner and spent four hours grilling and preparing a dinner from scratch. One friend arrives and asks if they can shower before dinner. I happen to like this friend so instead of taking them to the guest bathroom, I offer mine.

 

I keep about 20 different types of hair care products, shampoos,  as well as disposable razors, extra toothbrushes, etc in case someone comes without them I like to try and have their brand on hand to make them feel more at home.  I also keep about 12 different bottles of men's cologne on hand.

 

My guest chooses a new bottle of expensive shampoo, MY expensive refillable razor with the refills and the Armani Sport cologne. He showers and we all sit down to a great dinner.

 

After dinner when everyone leaves,  I go into the restroom to clean up after my friend's shower and found that they took  my items with them. Is there a new etiquette for guests that anything they use they get to take home with them? I am annoyed by this but don't want to embarrass them by asking them why they took my items when they left.  Am I in the wrong here or was that a crass move on their part?


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Posted on Jul 29, 2018 at 10:03 PM

Hi Taylor,

Yes there is an implied etiquette. But, that really wasn’t a friend. The person you called friend stole from you. He has no respect for you. If he was a friend he’d respect you by asking to use the expensive, shampoos, cologne and razor. You need to now decide if he should be on your list of friends.

At least your friends showed up.

Years ago I threw a huge 4th of July party for 20 couples. All new friends. It took a couple of days to prepare all the food for 42 people. Food was made from scratch with fresh fruits, vegetables, desserts, and a variety of bbq meats, and several kinds of beer and wine. All confirmed 24 hours before and that was after an RSVP. None showed up.

You are on MM to find your match in life. Maybe she has better friends. Good luck in your search.

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Posted on Jul 21, 2018 at 09:22 AM

Hello .. No doubt you can not even call friends. A real friend does not abuse your trust and what poorer way to make himself known

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Posted on Jul 18, 2018 at 02:42 PM

Stay away, know yourself and date only like minded people. You said nothing , so it's too late . Before the next date , play the 20 questions game. Ask them if they would use your room to take items home with them :)

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Posted on Jul 16, 2018 at 02:33 AM

Hi

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Posted on Jul 13, 2018 at 11:23 AM

Is the pope Catholic...it is called theft. They are not your friends, users...rid yourself of him.

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Posted on Jul 12, 2018 at 09:29 PM

I’m sorry to hear that happened to you... Not only will I call them on it, I’ll ask them to return it or else! The word “etiquette” does not fit in with Theft! Did they mistakingly taken your bathroom as a “hotel” to take the little soaps etc? I always take the direct approach and call them on it because they disrespected the very sacred place you call “home” and took “your property” without your permission!

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Posted on Jul 10, 2018 at 04:12 PM

I would totally say something.

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Posted on Jul 09, 2018 at 10:59 PM

You inflate your hospitality and allow them to clean up and to use whatever to make themselves smell good and leave the products where they found them

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Posted on Jul 09, 2018 at 07:15 PM

Now you know who and what they are  Don't invite them again.  


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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 03:25 PM

I agree that I am not running a soup kitchen. I leave my charity work outside my home. But I can't help but wonder if I did or said something that made them think I wanted them to take these things. In that case I am weary of mentioning it and embarrassing them.


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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 03:22 PM

Quoting Good2BTheKing:

This conversation is actually helpful. I had no idea having premium shower/bath products for guests was a thing (other than maybe a nice hand soap in the bathroom if you had a female guest). Normally all I do for guests is make sure everything is clean, and i sometimes buy new sheets and towels. I can make a nice meal for them, but I like to cook so that's no big deal. I wish there were more people in the blogs so I could learn what % of men and women would say "I agree completely!" or "Who cares?" Plus I'd like to know the socio-economic background of the people who give the different answers.



I don't know if it has to do with an economic background. I am not a millionaire, I was just taught to treat my guests with class. Hearing the points of others is interesting because when I visit someone's home I am usually treated quite well myself regardless of their economic background. 


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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 03:18 PM

Quoting dadgad56:

I'm from a different planet. I've never met anyone providing such elegance, for would-be guests who stay over. No wonder he absconded with your stuff, for a brief moment he thought he was at some upscale salon or day spa.



I had no idea what I do is above and beyond. I was taught to treat a guest with the utmost respect and honor in my home. 


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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 11:44 AM

I'm from a different planet. I've never met anyone providing such elegance, for would-be guests who stay over. No wonder he absconded with your stuff, for a brief moment he thought he was at some upscale salon or day spa.


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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 08:59 AM

Ask back for your stuff , your not running a Soup kitchen , damn you can’t be to Nice to people you give them an inch and they take a yard

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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 08:30 AM

This conversation is actually helpful. I had no idea having premium shower/bath products for guests was a thing (other than maybe a nice hand soap in the bathroom if you had a female guest). Normally all I do for guests is make sure everything is clean, and i sometimes buy new sheets and towels. I can make a nice meal for them, but I like to cook so that's no big deal. I wish there were more people in the blogs so I could learn what % of men and women would say "I agree completely!" or "Who cares?" Plus I'd like to know the socio-economic background of the people who give the different answers.


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Posted on Jun 27, 2018 at 12:24 AM

Quoting TaylorApples:

Is there a new guest etiquette I am unaware of?

 

I invited some friends for dinner and spent four hours grilling and preparing a dinner from scratch. One friend arrives and asks if they can shower before dinner. I happen to like this friend so instead of taking them to the guest bathroom, I offer mine.

 

I keep about 20 different types of hair care products, shampoos,  as well as disposable razors, extra toothbrushes, etc in case someone comes without them I like to try and have their brand on hand to make them feel more at home.  I also keep about 12 different bottles of men's cologne on hand.

 

My guest chooses a new bottle of expensive shampoo, MY expensive refillable razor with the refills and the Armani Sport cologne. He showers and we all sit down to a great dinner.

 

After dinner when everyone leaves,  I go into the restroom to clean up after my friend's shower and found that they took  my items with them. Is there a new etiquette for guests that anything they use they get to take home with them? I am annoyed by this but don't want to embarrass them by asking them why they took my items when they left.  Am I in the wrong here or was that a crass move on their part?



 

There is no new guest etiquette ..its still the old tradition..

'A guest is a guest  nothing more " ..but some doesn't follow

or practice it to remind you ..You did it right to ask them ..its your place and the hostess ..


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Posted on Jun 26, 2018 at 10:54 PM

Quoting Good2BTheKing:

Seriously, I have never heard of someone going to all of this trouble for guests.  If they're going to shower at your place, do they pack a change of clothes or do they just put their dirty clothes back on? If they can pack a change of clothes, why can't they pack their bath products as well? I don't see why an average brand of shampoo and soap wouldn't suffice, particularly for men.



I don't own average brand shampoo and my guests are worth the same quality I am. On this occasion the person in question was running late and came straight from work so as not be rude and be late. So yes, they did have to put the same clothes back on.

 

But as you being a man I am surprised to hear how you feel a man is worth so little. Men are beautiful creatures to be treasured and treated with the best of everything. I would never care for a man as a friend or other and toss him some cheap toiletries as though that were all he were worth to me. 


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Posted on Jun 26, 2018 at 10:38 PM

Seriously, I have never heard of someone going to all of this trouble for guests.  If they're going to shower at your place, do they pack a change of clothes or do they just put their dirty clothes back on? If they can pack a change of clothes, why can't they pack their bath products as well? I don't see why an average brand of shampoo and soap wouldn't suffice, particularly for men.


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Posted on Jun 26, 2018 at 09:46 PM

Quoting bronzebeaut484:

Seriously???? That’s rude. Call them out. If they’re a real friend never would of taken it. Or they wouldn’t care you called them out


I don't want to embarrass them in case I did or said something that gave them the impression I wanted them to take them. I just can't imagine what that could have been. I personally would never take something from someone's home so it has me baffled and annoyed. 


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