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Posted on Jun 24, 2018 at 02:11 PM

So I took the Myers-Briggs personality test today and I just felt I needed to share the results.

 

So apparently, I'm a Architect (INTJ-A)

 

In romance, people with the Architect personality type approach things the way they do with most situations: they compose a series of calculated actions with a predicted and desirable end goal – a healthy long-term relationship. Rather than falling head over heels in a whirlwind of passion and romance, Architects identify potential partners who meet a certain range of pre-determined criteria, break the dating process down into a series of measurable milestones, then proceed to execute the plan with clinical precision.

 

In a purely rational world, this is a fool-proof methodology – but in reality, it ignores significant details that Architects are likely to dismiss prematurely, such as human nature. Architects are brilliantly intellectual, developing a world in their heads that is more perfect than reality. People entering this world need to fit this fantasy, and it can be incredibly difficult for Architects to find someone up to the task. Needless to say, finding a compatible partner is the most significant challenge most Architects will face in life.

 

Politeness Is Artificial Good Humor

Sentiment, tradition, and emotion are Architects’ Achilles Heel. Social standards like chivalry are viewed by Architects as silly, even demeaning. The problem is, these standards have developed as a means of smoothing introductions and developing rapport, of managing expectations, the basis of personal relationships. Architects’ propensity for frank honesty in word and action tends to violate this social contract, making dating especially difficult for them.

 

As they mature, Architects will come to recognize these factors as relevant, incorporating pace and emotional availability into their plans. But the meantime can be dangerous, especially for more Turbulent Architects – if they are shot down too many times they may come to the conclusion that everyone else is simply too irrational, or simply beneath them intellectually. If cynicism takes hold, Architects may end up falling into the trap of intentionally displaying intellectual arrogance, making solitude their choice rather than happenstance.

 

Always Remain Cool

The positive side of Architects’ “giving up” is that they are most attractive when they aren’t trying to be attractive, working in a familiar environment where their confidence and intelligence can be seen in action. Allowing others to come to them is often Architects’ best strategy, and if they perceive a potential to the relationship, they will spare no effort in developing and maintaining stability and long-term satisfaction.

 

Architect (INTJ) romantic relationships

As their relationships develop, Architects’ partners will find an imaginative and enthusiastic companion, who will share their world and at the same time grant a huge degree of independence and trust. While Architects may never be fully comfortable expressing their feelings, and may spend more time theorizing about intimacy than engaging in it, they can always be relied upon to think out a mutually beneficial solution to any situation.

 

Architects seek strong, deep relationships, and trust their knowledge and logic to ensure that their partner is satisfied, both intellectually and physically.

But when it comes to emotional satisfaction, Architects are simply out of their element. Not every partner has the sort of fun Architects do in addressing conflicts and emotional needs as puzzles to be analyzed and solved. Sometimes emotions need to be expressed for their own sake, and putting every outburst under the microscope isn’t always helpful. If this becomes habit, or Architects think it may, they are capable of simply ending the relationship, rather than dragging things out.

 

Truth and Morality

Architects are bewilderingly deep and intelligent people, bringing stability and insight into their romantic relationships. They prize honest, open communication, and all factors of the relationship are open to discussion and change, but this must be reciprocated. Architects do what they think is right, and sometimes that comes across as cold – it’s important to know that Architects don’t make these decisions lightly. They spend a tremendous amount of time and energy trying to understand why and how things go wrong, especially if they’ve devoted themselves to the relationship, and they certainly hurt deeply when things fall apart.

 

The challenge is finding partners who share those same values – though Intuitive (N) types are uncommon, they may be a must for many Architects, as sharing this trait creates an immediate sense of mutual belonging. Having one or two balancing traits, such as Extraversion (E), Feeling (F), or Prospecting (P) can help to keep a relationship dynamic and growth-oriented by keeping Architects involved with other people, in touch with their emotions, and open to alternate potentials.

 

I just found it interesting and very accurate.

 

But I did want to address something. I was talking to someone I know who lives in Oregon, we have been PlayStation friends for years. When I told her about creating my profile on the site and getting back into dating, what I'm seeking, etc. She asked me why am I seeking a woman who makes more money that I do. As I said in my last blog, my salary is $70,000 U.S. a year. And I live very, very well here in Tijuana. Anyone who is in the SoCal/Baja California area can attest to this of how it is here in Tijuana. So I do not need a woman's money. I just value a woman who is self-sufficient, and independent and does not need anyone (the government; yes that includes food stamps, friends, family, etc) to support her financially. But also for once, I honestly want to know what it feels like to not be in control. I just find a woman with both money and power extremely sexy. This is why I do not believe in defining gender roles. 

 

It's what I am seeking. Take it or leave it. Just like the Myers-Briggs test says: In romance, people with the Architect personality type approach things the way they do with most situations: they compose a series of calculated actions with a predicted and desirable end goal – a healthy long-term relationship. Rather than falling head over heels in a whirlwind of passion and romance, Architects identify potential partners who meet a certain range of pre-determined criteria. And that is one of the criteria.



“I can accept anything, except what seems to be the easiest for most people: the half-way, the almost, the just-about, the in-between.” ― Ayn Rand
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Posted on Aug 09, 2018 at 09:28 PM

We tend to be like our profile pattern.  That does not mean we are like our profile pattern.  We can bend here and there.  

 

 

 

 


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Posted on Aug 02, 2018 at 02:23 PM

Ivory, Going all out good.

Researchers have found men and women process falling in love differently. Men mentally approach it through logic which takes some time. Then they move to the emotional decision. This can take a while for men. Women come to an emotional decision fairly quickly without logic so it doesn’t take them very long to fall in love.

Good luck with your search - Stay Safe, Be Happy - Jay

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