Member's Blog > Funtimes0007's blogs > ** LOVE = ? **
** LOVE = ? ** Sort by:
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Posted on Mon, Jul 31, 2017 02:50 AM

LOVE = Loss Of Valuable Energy?

"or"

Life's Only Valuable Emotion = LOVE?

"or"

LOVE = Land
 of Sorrow, Ocean of Tears, Valley of Death, End of Life?

"or"

Life Offers 
Valuable Experiences = LOVE?

Thoughts...

 


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Posted on Thu, Aug 17, 2017 10:41 AM

Quoting funtimes0007:

Do you want to add any to the list?



No.  That would just be another list to argue about.   



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Posted on Wed, Aug 16, 2017 12:11 AM

Quoting rmac22:

I'll take 2 and 4.  



Do you want to add any to the list?



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Posted on Tue, Aug 15, 2017 06:01 AM

live offering valuable experiences!


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Posted on Mon, Aug 14, 2017 10:42 PM

I'll take 2 and 4.  



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Posted on Mon, Aug 07, 2017 10:13 PM

Quoting Heidi_Reno:

the vulnerability comes when you open up and actually putting it all out there where you can actually be hurt (emotionally) or rejected. This does not generally happen immediately, but more over time. It is easy to keep that exterior and people at an arm's length. However, once you get to know people on a deeper level where there is a connection (more than liking the same movies or wine). The one where you start wondering is this person is the one you have been looking/waiting for. You start thinking about all the future possibilities and actually have (or at least started) fall in love with the person. You have your compromises and start.

I am very secure in who I am and what I bring to the table of a relationship. I have dated some good men and some not so good men. Unfortunately I will have to admit that I have unintentionally hurt someone when I ended a past relationship. I loved this person as a friend, but there was no passion. It would have been unfair to both to settle.

@Heidi_Reno: I think love is like a box of chocolate. You never know what you find next :) lol yes Forest Gump said it the best.

I think the main issue is that people loosely use the word "Love" just like many people loosely use the word "friends".

If we look at deep down into human psyche, our primal basic need, I would break down the love cycle in the following order:

1. First, comes acceptance. It's human nature that we want "ALL" to accept us for who we are. Goes to your point of rejection. When someone rejects another person on the basis xyz, we feel hurt because it's not under our control how nature created us or what we experienced in life and how we were raised. Undoing what we were taught from childhood and life experiences makes every individual unique. This is simply compassionate love.

2. To me, love is nothing more than forming a unique physical and emotional communication with another individual. The feeling of being connected goes back to acceptance at a much deeper level. We can call Passionate love.

3. Love is ideally preached to us that it will exist for eternity, in a realistic world, love is an experience that can last a life time or can last for as long as two people want them.

4. At even a much deeper level, here comes the real culprit, "expectations"! Although, we claim that love is supposed to be unconditional, in all reality is 100% opposite of how it's been defined. The expectation part arises due to one emotionally (and sexually) making themselves vulnerable, hence we expect the other person not hurt us.

Ah ha..love is a lot more complex than how we want it to be summarized in one word which is not possible.

 

 

 



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Posted on Mon, Aug 07, 2017 09:53 PM

Quoting Gentlebreeze2016:

@fun times reading over a second time I think I will accept both.  In terms of love being a single word is not as simple as that. There are various forms of love towards different people in our lives such as family and or friends.  Words like caring being considerate etc come to mind.  



ok..but we all tend to demand "love" in a universal format. If Love has different meaning to all, why even bother to use the word love which has no defined meaning :)



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Posted on Mon, Aug 07, 2017 09:51 PM

Quoting Goddess1P:

never give up loving because after all it feels so amazing to share the bliss!


ok..and what is your definition of love?



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Posted on Mon, Aug 07, 2017 07:44 PM

never give up loving because after all it feels so amazing to share the bliss!


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Posted on Sat, Aug 05, 2017 02:40 PM

Quoting funtimes0007:

@Gentlebreeze2016 - Why not accept both? :)

Do you think Love should have one single meaning?

I think love is an abbreviation, not a word. What do you think?



@fun times reading over a second time I think I will accept both.  In terms of love being a single word is not as simple as that. There are various forms of love towards different people in our lives such as family and or friends.  Words like caring being considerate etc come to mind.  



Carpe diem

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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 11:56 PM

Quoting isitfate4unme:

Love can be all of the above. Perhaps some are lucky in love, but unfortunately for many, love has probably felt like all of these things (and more), at one time or another.
Regardless, remember that it's better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all. ❤️


@fate - So you are agreeing and saying love has no defined meaning. It means different to everyone.

I do have a problem with, "it's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all."

Is this means when we do love, we do expect something back in return? is it possible simply to love and never expect anything back?



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 11:03 PM

Quoting PearlBeforeDogs:

I think the being vulnerable part mostly means making that person so valuable to you that they are capable of hurting you. I'm very accepting of myself, and don't tend to take societal pressures or views too seriously, but when I'm in love that person's view of me means everything to me. That is what vulnerability in love means to me, that you open yourself up to this person knowing that they could hurt you in a way no one else can but hoping that they won't.


@PearlBeforeDogs - Great explanation for sure...

I guess the main question still to discuss further that isn't hurt kind of part of experiencing the intensity of love between the two? Don't we all love arguing and fighting with the ones we love the most and realizing how much we really love that person to allow them to hurt us? :))

I know I am beating this topic to death, but I appreciate everyone's inside so far...


My first GF who I dated and loved for 8 years, left me, hurt me then called me on her wedding day to take her back! Explain that...No I never took her back even though I was still in love with her Or I was not? :)))



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 10:57 PM

Love can be all of the above. Perhaps some are lucky in love, but unfortunately for many, love has probably felt like all of these things (and more), at one time or another.
Regardless, remember that it's better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all. ❤️


Isitfate4unme

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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 10:56 PM

Quoting kisssky:

" love is the only reality"(Brian Weiss)


@Kisssky - true, but only in virtual reality perhaps to really see it, as all of us can only experience it, can't touch it, can not measure it, can not demand it :)



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 04:13 PM

I think the being vulnerable part mostly means making that person so valuable to you that they are capable of hurting you. I'm very accepting of myself, and don't tend to take societal pressures or views too seriously, but when I'm in love that person's view of me means everything to me. That is what vulnerability in love means to me, that you open yourself up to this person knowing that they could hurt you in a way no one else can but hoping that they won't.



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 02:14 PM

" love is the only reality"(Brian Weiss)



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 02:13 PM

Quoting Heidi_Reno:

I am realistic about love and relationships, but I think you are vulnerable when you truly love and care about someone. They get to see all of you the good, the not so pretty, your strength and your weaknesses. To truly open up yourself to them and trust/pray that you do not get hurt. Not only a lesson about when you open up to someone, but to also be kind to someone who is willing to show you all sides of themselves.

@Heidi_Reno - I totally agree and I am happy to see a woman is taking a practical approach towards love (a rare find), hard to find these days.

I agree that to be in true love, one has to show their good, the bad, their strengths and weaknesses etc. but the question remains why it would make someone vulnerable?

I think what makes someone vulnerable is the fact that the person themselves have not truly accepted who they really are. In our societies we allow people to set the norms and have developed a judgment based social system. Especially for the women, it's crazy out there. 

It took me a very long time to get to a point in my life where no one can hurt me as nothing bothers me about what I bring to the table :) and those who hurt others intentionally or unintentional are simply insecure about themselves...

Your thoughts?



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 12:51 PM

I am realistic about love and relationships, but I think you are vulnerable when you truly love and care about someone. They get to see all of you the good, the not so pretty, your strength and your weaknesses. To truly open up yourself to them and trust/pray that you do not get hurt. Not only a lesson about when you open up to someone, but to also be kind to someone who is willing to show you all sides of themselves.


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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 12:21 PM

Quoting Gentlebreeze2016:

I am torn between the second and the fourth


@Gentlebreeze2016 - Why not accept both? :)

Do you think Love should have one single meaning?

I think love is an abbreviation, not a word. What do you think?



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Posted on Wed, Aug 02, 2017 01:16 AM

Quoting Heidi_Reno:

Lessons On Vulnerable Emotions.
or
Life's Only Valuable Experience


@Heidi_Reno - Interesting response. So it appears that you take more of a practical/rational approach towards love and don't allow emotions to come into play that easily.

 

Being Vulnerable is a must have to be in love?



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