Communication is a very powerful tool in determining the direction careers and interpersonal relationships take. It might be the most crucial skill one will ever learn.
Being born without the gift of communicating easily with others shouldn’t limit you from approaching anyone with confidence. It is a skill that you can learn and practice, and within no time, you will surely be approaching even beautiful women around you!
Certainly, starting a conversation with a really attractive woman is likely to intimidate most people. Nevertheless, letting an awesome opportunity of meeting a new person go because of being too shy and intimidated to approach them is just not good at all.
If you get nervous whenever you try to reach out, here are 7 practical tips to help you start navigating that first conversation like a pro.
Shift focus to her
Don’t be anxious about getting shot down by a woman. If this happens, you aren’t the problem. She could be having insecurities or isn’t interested in having a conversation with you. If you stay focused on your next statement or your thoughts, she will notice that your attention isn’t solely on her. If something distracts you while you are paying attention to your thoughts, then you really aren’t having a conversation with the lady at all.
If you are an introvert, the thought of initiating conversations with others will likely be daunting and draining for you. There’s hope though. Introverts make up almost half of the population. This might make it difficult for a number of women to respond to you. Nonetheless, it gets easy when you do what you revel in.
Starting with a compliment is one of the most efficient ways of striking up a chat with an attractive woman. Compliments are great because they show that you are attentive, kind, considerate and a good conversation partner.
Don’t be tempted to open up by complimenting the woman about their physical appearance. A statement such as “Your eyes are beautiful”, isn’t bad, but is not encouraged. An effective complement is one that pays attention to her personality.
Try to ask questions that are open-ended
A close-ended question is one that calls for responses such as yes, maybe or no. They aren’t great ways of having a continuous and lively conversation. They only make sense when talking to people you are used to talking to.
With open-ended questions, phrases such as what, how, when, why and where are common. The goal of using such phrases in a conversation is to prompt another person’s feelings, thoughts, and opinions. Your luck with women is increased by using open-ended questions while having conversations with them.
Before setting out to meet women, come up with a list of around 10 or so things you look forward to talking about. They could be sports, trends or hobbies. Listen keenly to others and keep in mind that they may have different opinions that need to be respected.
Make a joke
Jokes are good ice breakers. Goofy and cheesy jokes can bring a relaxed, upbeat ambiance that makes it easy to keep the conversation going.
However, some caution should be exercised with jokes. It is important to shun insensitive, vulgar, gross and political jokes. These are the kinds of jokes that one makes with friends or people that they have interacted with before. They truly are not good ways of creating noble first impressions on casual acquaintances or strangers.
As cliché as it sounds, landing a joke in the first stages of a conversation notifies your converser that you are one of those people that have a great sense of humor. This is a very desirable trait when it comes to attracting women.
If you institute your first impression as a hilarious guy while starting a conversation, you are likely to present yourself as an attractive person.
Search for things that you have in common
While striking up a conversation, an effective strategy of boosting what you are talking about is by invoking what you both agree to. This might call upon you to take full advantage of the conversation set.
You can modify this practical tip to fit any type of event that you are attending. If you are at a party and spot an attractive woman that you would like to chat up, you could ask, “How are you acquainted with the host?” With this, you are able to establish that both of you have someone in common, which paves the way for the rest of the conversation.
At a work event, the question could be twisted to “How long have you worked for this company?”
Regardless of the situation, you find yourself in, working with the common ground is a solid way of starting and keeping the conversation flowing.
Refer to popular culture
If you find yourself struggling to come up with common ground with someone, try to steer the conversation towards current events in the pop culture arena. Think of something that she might be familiar with and try to present it in a funny way.
Your safe bets are events such as new music, new movies and reality shows. Remember to keep the conversation cheerful and to steer away from current events that you view in a negative way.
You are better off not talking about how you loathed the latest season of a popular show before you know your partner well. What if she loved that particular season more than anything she has ever watched before? That would make the conversation pretty awkward.
Keep past relationships in the past
You risk killing the conversation with a person you just met if you mention past relationships. If you let a quick mention about your ex slip, your current conversation partner might think you are more interested in talking about your ex than getting to know her.
It doesn’t matter how your previous relationship ended, whoever you are trying to strike up a conversation with might be the best woman you will ever date. Try to cultivate healthy, joyful and positive vibes rather than digging up old hatchets.
Talking to women has never been and will never be rocket science. It all boils down to strategy and confidence. What’s the worst that can happen really? It’s probably just her saying no.