I am a larger size woman. I am 40 yrs old 5'5 at 190 lbs. about a size 16. When I was younger I was so skinny people thought I was anorexic, I was 5'5 at 100 lbs. That was a long time ago before I ever had any kids. Now I am my current weight and people look at it as plus size but yet I am happier in my own skin moreso now than when I was skinny. I was very insecure back then.
I would be willing to loose weight if I had the opportunity to have a personal trainer however I personally think someone should love me for me not judge me by my extra weight. They would have to love me for me 1st:)
It is so crazy that most men on this site want a woman that is much younger than themself and thin. I'm not saying this cause Im full figured but to me its very shallow. I read by another post that "We are first and foremost visual creatures and if we are not attracted to you we are not interested in you. An overweight woman does not fit with the lifestyle or image that a successful man wants and needs to portray.". That is obsured. Do you really think that that skinny model/arm candy is gonna be by your side when you get sick? She will end up hiring someone to take care of you while she's bumping the pool boy and out spending all your money finding every excuse not to be there for you when your ailing. Then when you die, your family will be mad that she gets it all to live with her next husband. Im sorry guys but with all the money you have, use your friggin brain. You may want to impress everyone around you by having such a hot woman on your arm but REALLY everyone is looking at you like, "ok, she's using him for the money" and she WILL TELL YOU EVERYTHING YOU WANT TO HEAR so she can get some of what you have. Alot of them are out screwing other men while you are out working long hours, out of state, country whatever to make that money. And another thing, they either won't want to bear your child in fear of losing that figure OR they will like asap so they will have a guarenteed check for the next 18 yrs.
So you men need to open up your eyes if you wish
So, tell me, why is it so important to have that perfect image when you could have TRUE LOVE by someone who is moreso "average looking" or "full figured"? AND would be there no matter what and NOT have to hire someone to wipe your butt when and if your ailing. Are you that shallow minded? If you are, then you will get a shallow minded female on your arm and have a WONDERFUL future with that.
Thank you for reading, my point exactly:) Please hope some of this will make you guys think.
If the guy was into what you described, then would you really even want to be with them anyway? Regardless of what the others say, some guys do make very rude comments and do appear to be shallow, but to each his own. You do have to have a physical attraction (unless it's an unwanted arranged marriage or something completely plutonic :) ) so whether they are tall, short, skinny, heavy, bald, hairy, etc...we all are attracted to certain characteristics. Even if it seems the majority want something that fits into a certain mold, there are always those who "think outside the box" and that's who I'd prefer to be with anyway.
Both you women are exactly right ad thank you so very much for the nice comment about MY looks. I guess at the time that I posted this I was a bit frustrated cause I had read a previous post by a man saying that "full figured women do not fit into the lifestyle". It just irritated me, then upon reading most mens preferences I noticed they all want a "fit and skinny" woman.
I personally would love to get back into shape and am working on it slowly. However, just don't understand why ALOT of men rule out full figured women and just see what she may have to offer and that she may just BE very interested into getting back into shape as well. He may just like her, what harm can a date do? Quite honestly, I prefer tan, six pack men with dark hair however I don't rule out other men totally if they don't have that.
I really am not just speaking for myself cause Im by far not obese or huge, I am speaking for all full figure women and I have to add, I do not hate skinny woman. When I was younger I had a major issue with staying under 100 lb at 5'5, I could NEVER seem to of gained weight no matter what I did. People actually used to think I was anorexic. Then later in life I gained but it doesn't make me hate skinny women.
As far as calling men shallow that ONLY want to date the skinny woman. Yes they do have a preference, I agree. Just as I have my preference to date a man with a six pack but I don't rule out other men, HOWEVER alot of these men DO rule out full figured woman totally and aren't very nice at doing so. You can't control who you fall in love with and to be so close minded on that specification is shallow to me. She can have a heart of gold/ be a mans true love and just cause she has a bit of weight on her, is the man gonna turn away and wait till a skinny woman comes along to fall in love with? Thats shallow.
Thank you girls for your replys. I apologize for sounding so rude about skinny women in my original post. Like I said, I have no issues on skinny women, men, or whatever. I just could not believe that by one mans post of "full figured women do not fit in the millionaire lifestyle" just really is a ignorant post and infuriated me. =)
Author first let me tell you that you are a beautiful woman. Now, if you were a size 7 would you be any less kinder or loving than you are now? The size of a woman's dress doesn't not necessarily reflect the size of her heart. A thinner woman can be as dedicated to her ailing husband than any other size woman.
I think some people are very interested in sharing a "life style". That includes fitness and health. Perhaps the easiest way to communicate this is to say they are looking for a "fit" woman. I remember I was dating a man that wasn't all that into fitness. When I would ask him to go out and jog with me he would walk and I would actually jog around him. Not good.
I like sharing equal interests with my partner. Why wouldn't a man want the same thing? Perhaps a man likes to fish and wants his partner to go with him and be as motivated as he is about his hobby. I think its the same with fitness.
If you wanted to loose weight, you really don't need a personal trainer. You can do it on your own. You can walk, do exercise at home, eat healthy.....Its all about what YOU want. If you like that "fit and healthy" lifestyle go for it. If you don't, it might be that you'll happier finding a partner with your own lifestyle.
I think you're being pretty unfair to men in general.
Everyone has their specific tastes/preferences. Just because someone likes one thing and not the other doesn't mean that they are necessarily shallow. It just means they're simply more attracted to one than the other. There are a large amounts of men who are more interested in plus-sized women. Again, it's a personal preference. I am, myself, extremely petite at barely 5' tall and 90 lbs. I am not about to be upset if a man isn't interested because he likes women that are taller or perhaps bustier or have black hair or whatever. Because I know I also have my own tastes. I typically like men in their mid-late 20s and thick-rimmed glasses/geeky are a huge oomph factor for me. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't get to know a mid-thirties guy who was less "nerdy-looking." Yes, especially in online dating, looks are extremely important to us all. But I wouldn't say that's the only factor.
I think it is also incredibly rude/ill-informed to say only rich men are this way. Considering what I've said above, everyone has their own preferences. If you are only looking for a rich man, you, yourself, are also being "shallow" or "discriminatory." It's good to be honest with yourself if that's what you're looking for, but you can't get mad at others for having their own "wishlist" too.
I have, however, looked at your profile and you are a very beautiful woman (especially for 40- you do not look it at all). I have no doubt you will find a man who is interested in you as a person as well as completely and fully attracted to you without having to change yourself at all. If you are happy with who you are, don't let any man change that :).