ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.

INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:
Something other people have.
You have character lines.

Hi Ritzy Rit,

I loved your post, thanks! I like your sense of humour and you are right, it is all so true. I couldn't pick a favorite.

So here's a joke I heard recently.

The worst air disaster in Canadian history occurred today on a hill overlooking St. John's Newfoundland. (Newfoundland is famous for poking fun at itself). A two seater Cessna lost power and crashed into a graveyard, killing all passengers. So far emergency workers have found 480 bodies and expect the toll to go higher as digging continues through the night.