Do you have little 'Ditties' Message Board

  • View author's info Author posted on Oct 02, 2006 at 18:55


    Such as
    To temptation i'm quick to submit,
    I regret many sins i admit,
    Yet this isn't no boast,
    I regret far the most.
    Those sins i failed to Commit..
  • 18Comments

  • View author's info posted on Jan 19, 2007 at 23:24


    Queenie, you're the joke Queen of the Forum. You must be a blast at office parties! LOL
  • View author's info posted on Oct 10, 2006 at 18:18


    Thank God its not constipation, hey Blue this poor ol' fellow hasn't eaten for weeks , can he borrow your gnashers so he can go get some chow.
    He'll give em a good wipe down on his beard.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 10, 2006 at 14:36


    Queenofyourdreams write:
    Yes Blue, the Long Ranger and Tonto make us swoon with their amazing ditties...just thinking of them now makes me breath deep and sigh with anticipation.

    Re:



    well queenie, all I can hope is that he and tonto get overloaded, fall down on the job and some of their unsatisfied ladies turn and catch a flash of blue!!
  • View author's info posted on Oct 07, 2006 at 07:45


    Yes Blue, the Long Ranger and Tonto make us swoon with their amazing ditties...just thinking of them now makes me breath deep and sigh with anticipation.

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  • View author's info posted on Oct 06, 2006 at 17:55


    darn LR, you have the inside on all the girls on here. Katie, Queenie was it LR or tonto with the best ditty? and queenie, as for the ditty, I know you didn't write it, b ut by posting, you claimed ownership so it's on you!!
  • View author's info posted on Oct 05, 2006 at 10:34


    loneranger06 write:
    Geez i wondered where my damn surf boaerd had gone that's Yaws my powered surfing bawd, i have to smack that tiddler right between his piggy eyes t' make him go the way i want, he's great f' surfin on we jest seem to have the beach all t'our selves, Rides nearly as good as m'Silver do

    In todays society you may need to post warning signs so that you are up to date on the statues in what ever area you are swimming in with Yaws. Here is a sign for you, LR, please post on both sides of Yaws, your butt, your surf board and on any beach areas you swim through to avoid a law suit...

    "Shark bites may occur in this area" is what the small letters say at the bottom of the sign.

    Re:

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  • View author's info posted on Oct 05, 2006 at 10:19


    Blue, once you learn how to read you will see that the dittie was written by someone else....Must be the sun in your eyes...I have never had any children and so my ditties and all else are very special indeed...

    At least that is what LR says....

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  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2006 at 22:43


    TripleS write:
    All women have ditties, LR. By little do you mean champagne glass size? I think the men of MM came up with standard of measurement a while back...

    Re:





    No, we came up with hats as a unit of measure. 6.5, 7, 7.5, etc.

    lol
  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2006 at 15:03


    Geez i wondered where my damn surf boaerd had gone that's Yaws my powered surfing bawd, i have to smack that tiddler right between his piggy eyes t' make him go the way i want, he's great f' surfin on we jest seem to have the beach all t'our selves, Rides nearly as good as m'Silver do
  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2006 at 13:12


    Bet this shark scared the ditties off this guy!

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  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2006 at 09:03


    trying
    by gravity defying
    to leave no room, not even for doubt

    But I sure envy big breasted women
    I've seen them at parties you know
    With all confidence thrust
    In their mighty big bust
    Entrancing the men as they go

    Though I've heard from a big bosomed buddy
    That it's not all it's cracked up to be
    She says in frustration
    "Try to hold conversation
    When there's only two things a guy sees"

    Now if I paid a few grand to enlarge them
    To, say thirty-six b or c
    Would they still look so natural
    And could I class them as collateral
    Sorta like home improvements on me

    Now I've not taken this boob thing just lightly
    I've done quite a bit of research
    As I try to keep abreast
    In my mammary quest
    I've found there's a bit to be learned

    There's questions that need to be answered
    Like cleavage, how wide and how deep
    I can have nipples bigger
    But somehow I figured
    That could poke Sweetie's eye in his sleep

    Oh, I wish I had boobs that were awesome
    I'd buy a bright red bathing suit
    On the beach I would run
    In slow motion for fun
    To show off my best attribute

    Now don't think I'd just get them for vanity
    There's much I'd aspire to do
    I could feed many babies
    When I was lactating
    And for convenience, I could offer drive-thru

    In a t-shirt I'd test air conditioning
    They could 'see' if they had it too low
    And if I stood out



    Queenie, chilled nipples, lactating breasts and eyes where they belong??? what are you trying to tell us? that you're serving a youngster milk shakes?
  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2006 at 08:13


    Well Trippy having 3 S's reminded me of this little ditty There was a young girl from Muscat, who bred triplets Nit, Tit and Tat , there was fun in the breeding but hell in the feeding , when she found there was no Tit for Tat
  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2006 at 08:03


    LOL If I had a nickel for every time someone asked me if TripleSSS was...I could retire. Oh yeah..
  • View author's info posted on Oct 03, 2006 at 18:50


    TrripleSSS, God that's huge , never knew they went upto S let alone SSS, gee you want a wheel barrow for those pumpkins.
    And where i come from Champers is partaken from a 'flute' so if you girls got flute size ditties you've been short changed, go for 'Steins' next time. come to think of it a 'Yard of Ale' size would look strange to
  • View author's info posted on Oct 03, 2006 at 18:45


    Hi Gem theres only one way to administer every morning and every evening a large dose of TLC,
    Works every time, but only if administered by that 'special' person in your life.
    You end up fully cured and with bigger 'Ditties'
  • View author's info posted on Oct 03, 2006 at 18:10


    All women have ditties, LR. By little do you mean champagne glass size? I think the men of MM came up with standard of measurement a while back...
  • View author's info posted on Oct 03, 2006 at 16:56


    Here is another one that I found on the subject of Boobs.

    Boobs
    (subtitled: Points North)
    (sub-subtitled: Thanks for the Mammaries)

    Oh I wish I had boobs that would wobble
    Mine just stay still in one place
    In the breast hall of fame
    You won't see my name
    For my boobs there would be a disgrace

    Sure boobs of my size have their merit
    They're easy to fit with a bra
    And when I go for a dip
    You won't see one slip?out
    They stay put?just where they are

    And I'm not one to seek much attention
    So you won't find me strutting about
    In a boob tube that's trying
    by gravity defying
    to leave no room, not even for doubt

    But I sure envy big breasted women
    I've seen them at parties you know
    With all confidence thrust
    In their mighty big bust
    Entrancing the men as they go

    Though I've heard from a big bosomed buddy
    That it's not all it's cracked up to be
    She says in frustration
    "Try to hold conversation
    When there's only two things a guy sees"

    Now if I paid a few grand to enlarge them
    To, say thirty-six b or c
    Would they still look so natural
    And could I class them as collateral
    Sorta like home improvements on me

    Now I've not taken this boob thing just lightly
    I've done quite a bit of research
    As I try to keep abreast
    In my mammary quest
    I've found there's a bit to be learned

    There's questions that need to be answered
    Like cleavage, how wide and how deep
    I can have nipples bigger
    But somehow I figured
    That could poke Sweetie's eye in his sleep

    Oh, I wish I had boobs that were awesome
    I'd buy a bright red bathing suit
    On the beach I would run
    In slow motion for fun
    To show off my best attribute

    Now don't think I'd just get them for vanity
    There's much I'd aspire to do
    I could feed many babies
    When I was lactating
    And for convenience, I could offer drive-thru

    In a t-shirt I'd test air conditioning
    They could 'see' if they had it too low
    And if I stood outside
    My breasts pumped up with pride
    Police'd use me to stop traffic flow

    Well you can see I've a lot to consider
    For the big plunge, I need some more time
    So I'll keep you updated
    But for now they're just fated
    To stay as they are for a while

    And there's my sweetie who totally accepts me
    For he loves each and every little?bit
    He says "stay as you are
    You're the most beautiful by far"
    As he gazes into my eyes?not my tits
  • View author's info posted on Oct 03, 2006 at 16:51


    You really need to explain to the Americans here what a dittie is LR.

    Here is one for you...

    Tonto And The Paper
    In the store, whilst buying baloney,
    I met this Indian bloke,
    Who came in on a spotted pony.

    He asked of the shopkeeper,
    When at the counter he did stop,
    "Do you have toilet paper,
    Here in your lovely shop?"

    "Yes, mate, I have lots of brands,
    On my shelves, look right here.
    I have Softly's and doubles."
    But Tonto said, "Oh no, too dear!"

    "I need the most inexpensive,
    That you have in your store,
    For I come from the west,
    And I am very, very poor."

    "Yes, I think I can accommodate you,"
    The shopkeeper then did say,
    "I have No-Name brand paper,
    And it's real cheap, mate, eh !"

    He said, "Oh, that will be the one,
    I am very pleased to see,
    Give to me your No-Name paper,
    And I'll take it home with me."

    But alas, just three days later,
    He came back in a fit,
    "Here, take back your Lone Ranger paper,
    I am bloody sick of it!"

    "No, hang on mate, settle down,
    It's not the Lone Ranger, you see,
    This is No-Name toilet paper,
    That you've given back to me."

    "Oh, no, you are very wrong,"
    Tonto replied,
    "This is the Lone Rnagers paper,
    That you sold to me" he cried.

    "For I swear by my feathers,
    And on the Bible of the Gideons,
    It is rough, and it is tough,
    And it takes no shit off Indians !!"
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