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Style Tips for Mature Men
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Posted on Mon, Jul 17, 2006 01:49

The DON?Ts list

1) no handlebar mustaches ! you are not Tom Selleck, this is not a rerun of ?Mangum P.I.?. Why?- facial hair feels bad plus looking at it hurts me ;-(

2) pegged pants- if your pants are loose, then super tight at the ankle that means they are pegged. Pegged=bad. Why?-they make you look pear shaped. Buy straight legged, low waisted pants that are long enough to cover your socks even when you are sitting.

3)tucked to the ribs- the only time your shirt should be tucked in is if you are wearing a suit/tuxedo. Your pants should never be anywhere near your real waist line. Why?- lower waistlines make you look taller & thinner. Plus, nothing is worse than those guys with gigantic bellies who insist on tucking in their shirts. The front of the pants is wedged under the gut & the back is hiked up to cover the ass. ICK!

4)old clothes- there is a big difference between old & vintage. Just because the pants you bought in 1991 still fit, does not mean you should still be wearing them. Why?- your wardrobe should never be dated. When you are mature, your clothes should reflect that. You don?t have to be ?trendy? either, nor should you want to be.

5)free tee shirts with logos- do I really have to explain why???Your attire should be classic & elegant. Would Gary Cooper or Clark Gable be caught dead in a Jiffy Lube tee with shorts? I don?t think so....

6)the dreaded banana hammock- ok, so I encountered one of these yesterday. It was like an episode of ?Fear Factor?. Unless you are a 26 year old Brad Pitt clone, your dresser should not have any banana hammocks in it(for swimming or as underwear). Why? -Tighty whities are gross, speedos are unacceptable. End of story.

7)yellow teeth- ugh! I love coffee & red wine just as much as the next person, but let?s get real. Y?know they have whitening toothpastes now. There is no excuse to have a mouth full of corn

8)untended lawns- have you ever heard of the phrase ?manscaping?? Manscaping means to trim all unnecessary hairs ie basic grooming. You don?t have to shave your body, but grooming is key. Don?t be afraid of your scissors. Believe me, your hot, new girlfriend will be thankful!!!!



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Posted on Thu, Aug 31, 2006 21:20

statuesque4u write:
Oh Bernie you know i love ya. I'll hold my tongue so you can do your thing. I promise not ever to give you a hard time.

I just sit back quietly ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!
But i'll not say a word!!!



Stat, if you hold your tongue, you are going to choke too. I wonder if we can hold MM responsible??

lol



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Posted on Wed, Aug 30, 2006 22:18

Oh Bernie you know i love ya. I'll hold my tongue so you can do your thing. I promise not ever to give you a hard time.

I just sit back quietly ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!
But i'll not say a word!!!



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Posted on Wed, Aug 30, 2006 12:33

RapturousRed write:
lol on the list, agree with most...

wwwww: Perhaps if you had a banana you'd know where to buy a hammock for it...roflmao BUT DON'T, on this one she's right....let's not dredge up the whole speedo discussion again...

However, have to disagree with tee-shirts. I'm visualizing a man in his back yard mowing his lawn (the real lawn) in a suit...Now, if you wear one that says something like, "The more I drink, the better you look" or "I'm with her >" those are just tacky. My son has one I swear I am going to steal and wear someday, "I See Dumb People". I'd like to wear it to work but then that wouldn't probably go over too well.

And I guess my age will shine on this one: I prefer most shirts (men & women)to be tucked in. It just looks sharper to me. Now of course, Tommy Bahama's (nice - most of them) and the new (old, retro) bowling shirts (gross) are not intended to be tucked in. Untucked looks sloppy to me, like not wearing a belt when your pants have belt loops.

My preference is a clean shaven man, but those promising mustache rides might have a chance....okay, the man with a handle bar would have to have a lot more going for him...

mustache rides available here--tickets available for a song--and I mean a song!!!



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Posted on Tue, Aug 29, 2006 22:27

statuesque4u write:
wwww1234 write:
Boy she sure nailed me.

Where can I buy one of those dreaded banana hammocks?? I am missing that one.

I know all of you guys are going to throw away all of your hooters T shirts. Please send them to me.


lol


LOL 5W i missed this so here it is.
You know you don't want them to send you their Hooter Tees. You want the Tees with the hooters in them....LOL

It'll match your Bunn's photo album!!!!!


Stat, I have been trying to change my image a little - I am never going to meet a nice girl, and its people like you that make me bad. You know its hard for me to resist a one liner, but I have really been trying hard to behave.

SO,,,, no comment.

Da*mn this is just not going to work.
gag, -- holding mouth -- starting to squirm.....



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Posted on Sun, Aug 27, 2006 09:17

lexusdriverkj write:
Great advice for all men to follow. I do have to dis-agree about the casual tee-shirt(to a point). Though I don't do the giveaway tee-shirt. But a clean tee and jeans can work nicely.
It would also be very easy to start the same commentary for women as well.


Yes it would be easy to start this for women and i can just visualize what you might say....LOL

As to her advice on men a lot of it is good to a point. I also agree with RED on the T-shirt. Men look good in tee shirts if they have the body. Logos are sometimes funny but prefer the tight white...only in places where appropriate tho.....

I also like shirts on men tucked in when wearing casual. Of course they can't have a beer belly or one that hangs over too much as that doesn't look good either way. If they have it then a shirt untucked is better for them. It seems to be the style now a days. A more casual style. Occassions are the tell all.



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Posted on Thu, Aug 17, 2006 09:00

Great advice for all men to follow. I do have to dis-agree about the casual tee-shirt(to a point). Though I don't do the giveaway tee-shirt. But a clean tee and jeans can work nicely.
It would also be very easy to start the same commentary for women as well.



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Posted on Wed, Aug 16, 2006 18:37

Hi ya. What about tight white pants and a mask, and spurs that rake your ass when you'se get taken for a ride



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Posted on Sat, Jul 29, 2006 18:28

Red what on earth are you talking about? Fruit?



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Posted on Fri, Jul 28, 2006 15:16

lol on the list, agree with most...

wwwww: Perhaps if you had a banana you'd know where to buy a hammock for it...roflmao BUT DON'T, on this one she's right....let's not dredge up the whole speedo discussion again...

However, have to disagree with tee-shirts. I'm visualizing a man in his back yard mowing his lawn (the real lawn) in a suit...Now, if you wear one that says something like, "The more I drink, the better you look" or "I'm with her >" those are just tacky. My son has one I swear I am going to steal and wear someday, "I See Dumb People". I'd like to wear it to work but then that wouldn't probably go over too well.

And I guess my age will shine on this one: I prefer most shirts (men & women)to be tucked in. It just looks sharper to me. Now of course, Tommy Bahama's (nice - most of them) and the new (old, retro) bowling shirts (gross) are not intended to be tucked in. Untucked looks sloppy to me, like not wearing a belt when your pants have belt loops.

My preference is a clean shaven man, but those promising mustache rides might have a chance....okay, the man with a handle bar would have to have a lot more going for him...



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Posted on Thu, Jul 27, 2006 18:59

Well Ive always shaved in all kinds of funny places, when my trousers are out of date i cut the lags off and use them as shorts around the house. T shirts get used for decorating chores, just honing the blades on my 2 stroke nasal hair strimmer and teeth are in the washing machine, I think its sack clothe and ashes for me



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Posted on Fri, Jul 21, 2006 21:43

Boy she sure nailed me.

Where can I buy one of those dreaded banana hammocks?? I am missing that one.

I know all of you guys are going to throw away all of your hooters T shirts. Please send them to me.


lol



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Posted on Wed, Jul 19, 2006 17:12

This is the funniest thing I've read all day. Thank you!



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