I am a very attractive goal oriented Black woman from Chicago and I am having a very hard time meeting a man on this site and many others that would be with a black woman and I really don't understand why. I have viewed many profiles and not a single one of them have black as one of their selections where you can choose the ethnicity of the person you may be interested in meeting. I really would like to know why and where I can meet a successful man that wants to be with me
Just an observation, your question specifically states "...financialy secure white/other men..." Could it be that you are coming across as though it is all about that one word "financially?" Could you be unintentionally giving off the message that it is all about your fianancial gains? Just asking the question. I realize this is a millionaire dating site but all men like to think it is a little bit about him even if he knows it is about $$ signs.
EXCELLENT Question....I see them stare, wave a little.......and then, when one has the guts to approach...I'm insulted to hear street venacular directed at me, I guess, in an attempt to be 'cool'? Primarily, I never see white males with mixed race females that resemble myself (Don't count Halle Berry, she finally got desparate enough to make her own reality, since she coudn't find it). I attended Regis University (Private Jesuit college), all of my sib attended private colleges, we're all extrememly articulate (No one can tell what race we are over the phone), skiing, Tennis, Travel, Continuing ed, Land and homeowners, no kids out of wedlock, Church of Christ members, conservative in dress and thought, family oriented (Parents and Grandparents were collectively cared for at home, until they passed) Avid readers, gardeners, animal lovers, and, oddly, quite often referred to by people of color as 'Acting, in two instances 'looking' & living like white people". Admittedly, one sibling, a Harvard lawyer, has been married to a white guy for about 20 years..YES: She was Double major graduate before they married...and, to this day, I think the only reason they married, is because he later admitted..he had no idea my sister was mixed race, or else...so, this all makes me wonder..is it racism? Because, a number of white men apparently had ALOT of sex with some women of AFRICAN descent, on the slave ships, and for hundreds of years thereafter...which explains the plethora of shades, over 100 hundred, among people with some African descent..so..then..maybe it's fear that they won't be accepted into social circles..THEIR forgetting that by having a child with a woman of color, they will actually have a GREAT chance at having a child in the NBA, NFL, PGA, etc...My blond beard/mustache, Green/blue eyed brother says, 'They don't wanna walk in w/ a 'dark-skin Shiqueeta', around their billionaire buddies and they don't think their friends will intrust them with millions if thy do so...afraid to invite 'Shiqueeta's fam members, because there are so many gorgeous (Fake) blonds who can help him further his career, and that "SHIQUITTA" probably only with him, so that he can help her support her 4 bebe's kids by 4 different men...sad.....4 females that my college educated Mom raised....and we've NEVER sought out a male, BLACK or WHITE, to support us! Nor have we been on welfare...I think white men harbor alot more fears, unlike a black man who will walk in to a upscale event, with a white woman that looks like a cross between Phyllis Diller/Carol Channing (Oh...wait...she recently admitted her father was black, but nort 'Real black"...what the helll does that mean?! and DARE anybody to look at him or his ugly woman sideways...get a back-bone, and women of color will come after you. Money and family crest doesn't come close to making a man..I read somewhere on this site, where a white male wrote, that he wouldn't date women of color, because he doean't wanna be used....I don't see the few women of color that are married to white men, raking them over the coals in divorce court...we have to much pride..we don't even try and do that to black..we're talk fom day one carry our own, stash money away in case you need to make a rune, be educated and if you can't do that, you be as strong as a man..as you can see, men walk off? A woman of black descent keeps that house ROLLIN' regardless..we do NOT need a male, to validate us..we don't crumble under pressure..we LIVE under it EVERYDAY!
Why do you sound so bitter? Interracial dating is by choice. No one forces it upon you. We as women, Black, White, Red, Yellow, no matter what colour, must learn to love ourselves #1 before we can expect any man, no matter his colour, to love us. I am a strong woman who has tremendous love for herself and I date interracially by choice, and have dated only White men for nearly 30 years. But I was also married to 2 gorgeous Black men before (an African American and a West African) and dated White, Latino, German, Jewish, Polish, etc., between the 2 marriages.
I have had no problems meeting and dating men of another race.. I dont know what it is but I date more white men than black... I once thought there was something wrong with me because black men NEVER asked me out... I have taken the path placed in front of me... I have dated professional men from MDs to lawyers... No problem... I love being me... With all my flaws and all... I dont nor do I ever intend to be anyone other than who I am... That comes across... Just be you...
I cannot give you a definitive answer to this, however I have experienced similar feelings in viewing womens profiles. I am not able to comment on this site as I have only recently joined, but I have noticed on other sites many women select that they are searching for a white male. I live in a predominantly caucasian part of the country, though I am not sure if that is the reason for womens selection one way or the other. I can say that I have also seen plenty of women who list that they only date black men as well. In public I do not see much prejudice , except in the rural areas, in the city not so much. Maybe people see this as a private area and their true feelings on race come out. Either way try not to let it get to you, every minority experiences it. Stay positive and you will find someone.
This comment is directed to goude200, to me you sound really bitter and you kinda talk too much.There is somebody for everybody and what 1 man don
t like some else will love.There maybe a white man out there for you but you seem so agressive and it seems like you have to throw out your credentials and achievements to show that you are worthy.But you dont.There are white men out there who have money and dont care what people say or think ,including their family.You havent come across the right one.By the way Wolfgang puck,George Lucas(there are more} have dark skinned sistahs.
I hear women make comments like this on a regular basis. Well here is the solution for anyone that feels the same way as the author; the first place to look for the right man for yourself is within yourself. And this begins with self love. Until you develop a self love so powerful that you don't NEED a man you will always feel like a victim; once you start loving yourself you will start attracting men from all over the place. Learn to love yourself first before you seek the love of someone else is step one of Seven. Some people pay $200.00 an hour to learn this, you got it for free.
Perhaps a combination of not wanting to be used, coupled with daily familiarity is the reason. Most of you have fascinating qualities that any man would cherish. So, break the ice more often to find the warm heart waiting for you.
I tend to disagree..I think if you are sexy and confident and can carry yourself in a way that exudes that.. ANY man will want you. It tends to be the opposite for me. Very successful white men are the majority when it comes to approaching me and recognizing a spark in me. black men on the other hand,from my experience tend to want a more financially unstable whirlwind booty call and as sexy as I seem all A girl really wants to know is if the looks go will they.
I think you should try blacksingle.com. You will find a lot of successful black men who are looking for women of color. Good men who know what they want and are not afraid to show both their strong and sensitive sides. And most of them are very good looking. They would appreciate a woman of color. try it.
I dont think that is the case on this site men know what they want and they want a certain woman. I do believe that certain races are looked at a certain way because of how they carry themselves especially women and you do as a individual have to be careful not to be put in that place. All my emails have come from white men i dont see many other races hypathetically speaking, on this site I have been in previous interracial relationships and have a child from a former husband whos twice my age I think you maybe are waiting for someone to contact you these privlaged men sometimes dont make the first move there spoiled lol, and you cant be too foreward or always try to play the victim just be normal. And you def. need more pics and clear ones.
I say to each his own. My philosophy has alway been . Is that every man ( because I do date out of my race if you will) has to treat me with the upmost respect. AND they do !!!!!! I expect no less.
(Because I do date interracially)
Do you think that it?s where you are trying to meet these men? I have had several white men tell me that they wanted to date black women but didn?t know where to meet them or how to ask them out. There is also the stereotype issue that keeps some from asking black women out. Although, maybe if you go out and mix and mingle where there will be people of the racial group you are seeking to meet then you will up your chances of meeting someone. I use to go to networking events like crazy and was asked out a lot by mostly white men. I think they were just amazed to see me as the only or one of a very few black women in a different environment then what stereotypes portray us as and realized that I am no different from any other woman.
I read your information and i used to live in Atlanta a few years ago and had purchased a home in Alpharetta, GA near one of the main country clubs. What you say is true to a certain degree. But it is attitude dear.. You could be outgoing , a conversation initiator etc. But if your exterior shows one side and your interior shows something else, a lot of men pick up on that and will not persue anything more than just the general conversation.
Dealing with white men is no different, you just have to slow down with them more, most of the time they want to be aggressive with a sista but have fear of being rejected with the attitude that they have at the back of their mind.
Also, you don't have to go all out and over do it to attract a white man. Just be yourself and the right one will come when you're not looking. I was approached at the supermarket check out line on three different occasions. The people on line were watching me like EF Hutton to see what i was going to say. The white men were very good looking too. But it is how you work your finesse to get one.
Another good place to meet one is at the gym. If you like working out, you won't have a problem finding one there.