I joined this site about 2 months ago. I have been on 2 dates. The first one I knew there was no chemistry so we didn't even plan to see each other again. Next date was with someone from another city. He came all the way to visit me and we had a great time. I think he was more into me than I was into him, but I was not going to give up. Over the holidays he called me or text messaged me every single day and kept asking when I was going to visit him. I decided to go and see him right after the New Year. I paid for my own flight (even after he offered) because I am not on this site looking for money, just a stable man. I spent 3 days with him and we had a great time. He introduced me to his children. Now all of a sudden I dig him and he becomes a ghost, calling only maybe once a week, never text messaging, I was not the one who came on so strong, so what the hell?!?! He called me his "girl" and even suggested taking me to Hawaii to this hotel he is a member of. Anyone have any advice for a woman who is a great catch????
Peoples feelings change or maybe he just like the "hunt." Once he caught you maybe he was ready for a new adventure. Maybe he is confused. Maybe he is a jerk. Sometimes we just don't ever find out the answer.
We will never figure what is wrong... they need a manual. Men say women should come with such. When it is them. This has happened to me on this site and others. You go out, the chemistry is there, there are laughs, great conversation, etc. And suddenly, you never hear from them again. What you always remember and must never forget is you're beautiful. You look great, it's apparent you have a great attitude... Hopefully you'll see him again years from now and he'll be with some nasty, horrid woman who makes him unhappy. Who let herself go after they committed. And you... you still look good!!! But it's certainly not you. It happens to many of us. If they tell you different, they are lying to themselves as they are on their profiles. Who knows why men do it??? That is the mystery I've been trying to figure out for years. If and when you do, please let me know!
omg I just joined again,lol... and it hasn't changed, but I am looking for new faces this time... It is not easy on any site it is a gamble any way you look at it but one day it will click and I am shooting for the moment it happens and you should to....
well ...i/m new ...and young...but pls don/t mind me if i ask u: Have u slept with him when u visited him or not??
I think that if u have than ...dear this was the only thing he was interested in. If u haven/t than maybe he was not SO into u as u thought! it/s hard to accept this view but it may be the true.
I have asked myself this many many times! and the only conclusion that i have came to understand and to accept is that most of men don/t really know what they want. they think they want something ..and they try to do everything to get that ..but along the way, just out of the blue, they realize that they don/t want that anymore.
On the other hand there are men that in the moment they meet u they feel they don/t want anything serious....so as long as they feel they don/t want anything serious ...they will not accept anything serious.
Bottom line is that u have to understand some men want something serious and some don/t!
From my heart to yours. This is not about him, it is about you. Everyone is a reflection of what is going on inside you. What triggered you emotionally about this man? Abandonment, lack of commitment, not keeping his word? When you identify your emotinal triggers, look deep to see where you do the same to yourself or others and clear it. The way to create what you truly want in your outer world is to create it within yourself first. I hope this helps.
I could be wrong and maybe it's just me but maybe if you took a well I'll let him make all the effort and see what happens attitude, that may have been the problem. Guys are all about ego and being respected. If I have to be the one to do all of the testing, calling etc, forget it. Why would the guy be the one doing all of the pursuing? Something to think about.
you know what? lol..i've met two men also, same reaction, don't know what it is or what they want anymore..you knda get that give-up feeling but still go on..lol..don't know what to tell you, im in the same boat.
You are not being fair at all. Personally, I would never stay with an abusive men, but there are woman that do that, it is not because that they don't have the spine to walk out...it is just that they don't get tired if giving the individual the benefit of the doubt.
I would like to add that men that are abusive are really manipulative and a trusting woman will go for all the BS if feeds her...she might even start defending him.
nothing is wrong with the real ones like my self. if you really look closely at the real issues, like the little things the suttle things that really show what kind of man he is. you will have a better feel about him, its all there the yes maam no mmam, yes sir no sir. treatin everyone with the same respect, valuing a womens mind and thoughts. thats enough but kick back feel the vibe cause the little things hold more wait so there showing you what that weight is worth....
angelic1975 write: From my observation, men are in it for the chase. I mean seriously. As soon as you begin to call them first or write them first they pull back and the game is over. Think of an animal chasing it's prey once they catch the prey and it's laying there dead they are no longer interested and walk away. Don't play possum. Keep him on his toes. I have met many men like that. Sad but true. And it's not just the guys women tend to play the game as well. Don't be so available and somehow they always come back for the chase again. Thats just my opinion on the matter:) Find someone that doesn't want or need to play the game! Good luck Jen!
Yes, but you see... guys like me in that respect are boring.
Then the women go onto cry and write about heart break because the game was too much for them... and they feel more or less "played".
Heh, games are for children. Leave the true romance to those who have matured beyond the foolish skirt chasing. Not all men are like that. I know I am not.
I might as well create a topic that reads "What is wrong with women?".
Sure, why not... right? Let's mention all of those women who allow themselves to marry abusive men and lack the spine to walk out of it.
Oh, and what about the gold diggers?
Leaving perfectly good men behind just because they want the abuse but demand a higher costs for it.
You see, I've adopted an attitude and a mindset that prevents me from ever wanting to fight over a woman or to play her games.
If more men had my attitude, you'd find a lot of so-called "beautiful" women being left behind for less physically appealing ones.
But, we can't have that now can we?
Nah, there isn't essentially anything truly wrong with the men.
It's the women willing to buy into games, play them back, and then give into the "Chase" as opposed to the purpose.
No disrespect intended individually towards any women here, but generally: Women can truly disgust me and make me sick.
From my observation, men are in it for the chase. I mean seriously. As soon as you begin to call them first or write them first they pull back and the game is over. Think of an animal chasing it's prey once they catch the prey and it's laying there dead they are no longer interested and walk away. Don't play possum. Keep him on his toes. I have met many men like that. Sad but true. And it's not just the guys women tend to play the game as well. Don't be so available and somehow they always come back for the chase again. Thats just my opinion on the matter:) Find someone that doesn't want or need to play the game! Good luck Jen!
jennifersandiego write: Thanks everyone... I took your advice... I am moving on dating others. I emailed him actually and he is cool. He is not looking for a serious relationship and is confuse about things so I'm dating others and we still talk every once in awhile but we'll see what happens..
Sounds to me he's the typical, "I want to chase it because I can't have it, but when I get it I don't want it anymore" kind of guy. The ones who use any and all means to get you and once they know they actually have accomplished it and you have decided to take yourself off the market, bam they're gone! lol I have 3 brothers and have encountered them and all my "adopted brothers" pull this on girls all the time. Sad, but true. They want the girl because she's a challenge and they don't completely have her yet. When they do get her, their minds go into "job well done" phase and it's over. They can't really explain why either. They just do it. And to be honest, it's the women who didn't put up with their crap and who always let them know they could leave at any time for any given man that walked by, that they married! Why? Because even though they know they married her, she makes it clear they better stay in line or they will bolt on HIM and that he has her by HER choice, not because she NEEDS him. It's really funny. The one is from Tennessee and when she lays into my brother he looks like a whipped puppy! This giant, special forces Leut. and she has him on his knees. HA HA HA
Good luck, girl and keep dating. Don't settle for the first or second guy, settle for the one who knocks you off your chair and takes your breath away! We can date anyone, but ONLY ONE is good enough to keep us!