You know what I cannot fathom at all? When you write to someone for months and then he calls and you begin a phone relationship and you even meet once and have an incredible time....... and then he stops completely.
katie, the same thing happened to me... it just baffles me how men can do that. But I've learned... AT LAST... to not wonder endlessly... I just wonder a few days just to give him the benefit of the doubt. and then I go: "HEY! His loss..." When it doesn't happen, it just means that someone better is going to come along and appreciate you for whom you really are... THAT'S what you have to think about...
I agree with Katie and Moonray, though I've experienced the same re: "Poof!" And thx for the pick-me-up, S4U. It is a great reminder that he isn't worth my time.
So Mag, Please, for all of us ladies, keep being the thoughtful, considerate man that you are...and not one of the "others" who just disappears :).
Ultimately, I think it's whatever I need to do to be able to sleep at night. If I feel I need closure, then I attempt to get it. If he doesn't respond, I have his response, ya know? That, in and of itself, is closure.
I've posted a similar topic: "When First Dates prove he/she isn't what was represented..."
I'd definitely like to hear your thoughts on this as well, but please post reply to that topic.
Got to get to work now. Have a great day, and "I'll see you on the dark side..."
You know what I cannot fathom at all? When you write to someone for months and then he calls and you begin a phone relationship and you even meet once and have an incredible time....... and then he stops completely. The "not knowing" is the hardest kind of an end to a friendship there is.
I had a friend last year. We were great together! I love men with fantastic personalities sprinkled with a great sense of humour. He was that. But one week, I heard nothing. I called - no answer. I emailed all addresses - no response. It started to really hurt!
Did he perhaps die? No, I'm never that lucky! I visited one of the dating sites to send him a wink and noted he had been checking out the site that very day! Needless to say ... I did NOT send him a wink. But it hurt because there's no answer to the screaming question ....... "Why?"
Luckily, I saw he had been on the other dating site. It lessened the hurt considerably. There are other hunky men out there who are even more fun. And you know who you are too! lol
I agree, 1HM, of course Mag will be the one who knows all about the situation he's dealing with... we don't... well maybe you do... but I don't.... well at least I don't think I do... well I'm not sure anymore...
1HM... I still feel that if the person is truly interested, then no matter how busy he is, he will shoot an email... after all, it takes but a few seconds.
I'm a very busy lately and I always find time to reply within 24 hours, and most of the time sooner... only if to at least acknowledge the email and say that I'll get back to them later.
I find that if the person is "too busy" to at least acknowledge the email, then further down the road, he'll be "too busy" to commit properly to a relationship and it will only end up in aggravation.
Now if the 2 people are the same way... WELL more power to them!!!!! lol
To answer your question:
1. I always reply to an email even if it's in the negative, that way the person on the other end doesn't wait in vain and wonder what happened... Thta's how I would like to be treated also...
2. If someone "disappears" like you said, I don't hunt them down. When someone is truly interested in you, they don't disappear, AU CONTRAIRE. It's like they say in the book of the same title: "He's just not that into you." "She" in your case... ;)