GOD SAID If you never felt pain, then how would you know that I'm a Healer? If you never went through difficulties, how would you know that I'm a Deliverer? If you never had a trial, how could you call yourself an overcomer? If you never felt sadness, how would you know that I'm a Comforter? If you never made a mistake, how would you know that I'm forgiving? If you knew it all, how would you know that I will answer your questions? If you never were in trouble, how would you know that I will come to your rescue? If you never were broken, then how would you know that I can make you whole? If you never had a problem, how would you know that I can solve them? If you never had any suffering, then how would you know what Jesus went through? If you never went through the fire, then how would you become pure? If I gave you all things, how would you appreciate them? If I never corrected you, how would you know that I love you? If you had all power, then how would you learn to depend on me? If your life was perfect, then what would you need Me for? THANK YOU, GOD!
A teacher was teaching her second grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her her students to ask their parents what the government is.When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and ask his what the government was.His dad thought for a while and answered, ''Look at it this way: I'm the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the work force, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.''''I still don't get it'' responded the Little Johnny.''Why don't you sleep on it then? Maybe you'll understand it better,'' said the dad.''Okay then...good night'' said Little Jonny went off to bed.
In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother's crying. He went to his baby brother's crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent's room to get help. When he got to his parent's bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn't there. So he went to the maid's room. When he looked through the maid's room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, ''OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the work force, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of crap
When you get what you want in your struggle for self
And the world makes you king for a day,
Just go to the mirror and look at yourself
And see what that man has to say.
For it isn't your father or mother or wife whose judgment upon you must pass.
The fellow whose verdict counts most in you life
Is the one staring back from the glass.
You may be like Jack Horner and chisel a plum
And think you're a wonderful guy.
But the man in the glass says you're only a bum
If you can't look him straight in the eye.
He's the fellow to please-never mind all the rest,
For he's with you clear to the end.
And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the man in the glass is your friend.
You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years
And get pats on the back as you pass.
But your final reward will be heartache and tears
If you've cheated the man in the glass.
And there were in the same country shepherds, abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them! And they were so afraid. And the angel said unto them, “Fear not! For, behold, I bring you tidings o great joy, which shall be to all my people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ, the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you: Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.” And suddenly, there was with the angel a multitude of the Heavenly Host praising God, and saying, “Glory to God in the Highest, and on Earth peace, and good will toward men.
That’s what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.
1 Timothy 5:13-14Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not.
Patient: My problem doctor is that obesity runs in my family. Doctor: No, your problem is that no one runs in your family. Saw this today and had a big laugh. Cheers, Ethan
Lol, good joke Ethan and thanks for contributing :)
GOD SAID If you never felt pain, then how would you know that I'm a Healer? If you never went through difficulties, how would you know that I'm a Deliverer? If you never had a trial, how could you call yourself an overcomer? If you never felt sadness, how would you know that I'm a Comforter? If you never made a mistake, how would you know that I'm forgiving? If you knew it all, how would you know that I will answer your questions? If you never were in trouble, how would you know that I will come to your rescue? If you never were broken, then how would you know that I can make you whole? If you never had a problem, how would you know that I can solve them? If you never had any suffering, then how would you know what Jesus went through? If you never went through the fire, then how would you become pure? If I gave you all things, how would you appreciate them? If I never corrected you, how would you know that I love you? If you had all power, then how would you learn to depend on me? If your life was perfect, then what would you need Me for? THANK YOU, GOD!