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Posted on Thu, Oct 10, 2013 17:20

Think about how you give someone a compliment. There was a friend of mine, she is very skinny,probably a size zero. She is unhealthy, I seriously don't know where she gets her energy from, it definitely isn't from eating a healthy amount of food.


She has Crohn's disease and add to that something equally as serious, I am pretty sure she's bulimic. So the question is, when I would see her, I wouldn't want to compliment her by saying something like, "You're so skinny, you look good."  instead I may ask how she has been and/or ask her about her family,etc. Remember when you compliment someone in a certain way you may be propagating the problem.


A few months ago, my neighbor friend passed away. I felt so sorry for her and her family. The last time I saw her, her clothes were falling off of her because she had lost a huge amount of weight, very unfortunitely it was due to having a hyperactive thyroid and lost the weight that way. She was down to skin & bones, got her cancer back and passed on :(


What if an old friend or a stranger saw her (before she was in her last stage) and complimented her on her skinny frame. I'm sure she would have been very happy to be considered an average weight instead of skinny.

 

I have focused on the skinny aspect here, I could post a lot about the opposite, being overweight but I need to get some stuff done so you will have to surmise for yourself what I'm thinking, maybe I can get back to it later.



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Posted on Thu, Oct 10, 2013 14:28

I went on two dates recently, they were both very different from anything I am used to. I told myself that I need to start saying yes more often so I did. Well...I should have stuck to saying no to the first guy. I had to say no quite a few times in person since he was such a sleazeball.


 

We can't help who we are attracted to and I am just not attracted to a large majority of men. This is not all about looks, it's about how you speak, what you say, what your personality traits are,etc.,etc.


 

It is way too much to type about but I was already out of my comfort zone with the fact that he spent part of his childhood (from 9-14) living in Iran and then moved to Egypt and went to school there. Ihad talked to him a few times on the phone,he had pretty much planned out our lives together before we had even met. One part of it I liked was that he was in need of a new office manager for his new location and since I am in need of a job, it sounded good to me.


 

I didn't lead him on but did say I would make a good office manager, discussing the new location,etc. While he was going on & on about all his feelings and plans, I said let's just enjoy the afternoon. I bought these discount cards I had told him about for some free wine tastings because that is what we were going to do, go wine-tasting for the afternoon at the nearby wineries. He said "Go ahead and buy them, not only will I reimburse you for mine but I will pay you for yours. I got a deal, instead of paying $80 online, I went through the trouble and met the seller in person and paid $40 for 2 cards.


 

This was something I would have never done on my own, buy cards for wine tastings...no. Even though the wineries are only minutes away, I virtually have never paid for a wine tasting for a few reasons, one of them being that I had a couple of friends who were members which means I received a few free wine-tastings,etc,etc.. Not a big fan of wine either, just saying.

 

 

I better finish this story up with the nutshell version. He drives out here, his one photo really didn't catch his unattractiveness enough. Sorry, gotta tell the truth. Okay, so I am not attracted to him, I will still give him a chance. In getting to know someone, I can become more attracted based on their personality and maybe there could be some chemistry....I said maybe.


 

He tells me about his business plans, he brags, he seemed to be especially proud about his latest model Rolex that I didn't even notice. The date went okay, I was polite and entertaining, I kept composed through his sleazier moments. I am not going to mention them now. Anyway, he was time for him to leave (thank-you God,lol) and I had to ask for him to pay me for the discount cards. I said "Do you think you could pay me for at least your card?" Remember he owes me $40.00. Hesitant but he managed to pull out a $20 from his wallet then he did it...this is so bad.. he said "This is my only cash I have in my wallet, can I have a ten back?" I gave it to him to get him out of my house. Yes, he was in my house. Leaving out a few details. 



So yesterday, I texted him about the job at first, he hired someone. Then I told him he owed me 30 bucks and he can mail it to me. This guy sent me several texts stating he only owed me ten,etc,etc. I had to remind him of what happened and quoted him of how he will pay me back.My last words were "I found your questioning disgusting. Enjoy your rolex!!"

 

We will see if he pays me. For once, I will be watching my mail.

 

My second date was a double-date and really a nice surprise. I will type about it later. The most important part and the ONLY disappointing part was that the "date" would only be a buddy at the most. I highly doubt we will ever hang out again but I would definitely say yes. No pressure, no nerves, he's a buddy and a generous buddy and his friend is dating my girlfriend. By the way, Brian (my girlfriend's date) is one of the nicest, funnest (is that a word) guys I have met in California and I've lived here for decades. More on this later.

 



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Posted on Tue, Oct 08, 2013 17:15

This site is a royal pain in the behind!  I very rarely have posted my own blog in the BLOGS section. Since MM recently stated they would allow some website information here as long as it wasn't a solictation,etc.etc., I decided to put them through the test!  I had to edit my opening post and couldn't do it, I made a new post to explain a correction that was needed and my first, initial post had dissappeared :(


I have requested more than once for the site to create a new headline of Current Events and/or Politics and they have not, so what is a concerned U.S. citizen to do?  Visit other forums where I am not censored , I get to post in real time and there are many readers to educate, or not educate since their minds are not capable of comprehending facts while the truth is happening right in front of them. Sorry guys but you will have to find your own way of getting information elsewhere.

 

I will continue some personal thoughts & happenings to a degree on here.

 

 

 



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Posted on Mon, Sep 02, 2013 22:29

Hello..anybody out there!  MM is really getting ignored, at least in the forum and blogs,.. for the most part. I find myself not wanting to contribute too much but not today!

 

 

 

Today is Labor Day and for me and a few friends, it is Maui Monday, usually it's just Taco Tuesday (on Tuesday of course) but I'm not complainin'!  It will be the last event of the summer for Canyon lake :(  Canyon lake is a nice, gated community with a man-made lake, it has a beachfront and clubhouse with some good food and drinks. The tacos are good and only a buck!!


 

 I will be meeting some friends, the only friend who likes to talk abut politics won't be there, too bad cuz there is a lot going on that I would like to talk about, at least a little. Talk, bitch then laugh..you gotta laugh and enjoy the good moments you get to have, right?

 

 

 Now about any more socializing and making a new friend there? One I would consider meeting again? Nope, not gonna happen :(  It will be family filled with a few volleyball players that will not be interested in socializing because it's California..the land of people with no communication skills. Nobody gives a **** about socializing, unless they are too young, too old, too drunk, too something :(

 

 

This ability of conversing with others and making new friends,etc. doesn't hardly exist here.  People are too wrapped up in their own little worlds, unaware of what is going on outside of theirs to care.  I manage to pull it out of a few or one or two but get kinda tired of being the one who has to do it, or wants to do it.  I suppose I don't HAVE to do it, in my world, it's called being polite.  It's also just inbred in me to want to relate to others for so many reasons.

 

 

 

I suppose this blog has taken a turn,lol, oh well, I am going to finish with it.  When my mom (I followed soon after) and I were new to living in California (except a stint way earlier), we noticed the palpable difference in the people here socially from the people back in Michigan and didn't like it but always made the best we could out of it.  I miss her, it's been 17 years. Anyway, I thank God that I am not a native Californian!!  There are some exceptions of course but that difference I mentioned never changed. 27 years now that Ihave been living here and I still feel it.


 

 Hope you had a fantastic long weekend!!  Mine isn't over yet :)


 

Update: Maui Monday was really nice..much better than expected.  They had island dancers for various islands, Hawaii, Tahiti, etc., they put on a whole show with drummers. It makes me want to go back to Hawaii. It was hot & humid enough to feel like I was in Hawaii, ha! The roasting of the pig and rum drink also helped ;)

 

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Posted on Mon, Aug 05, 2013 18:24

Quoting bepositive:

Very sorry to hear this news and so sorry for your loss.   How sad for her children and family.........sending you a HUGE HUG today my friend.  We are all here if you need to talk, scream, cry, etc.
I too beleive there is another life that awaits us when we pass.  I am sure your friend was greeted by family and friends that love her.

Thank-you BePositive, thanks especially for the cyber hug :)

Sorry it took me so long to reply, I do appreciate your message very much.



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Posted on Sun, Jul 14, 2013 21:00

Very sorry to hear this news and so sorry for your loss.   How sad for her children and family.........sending you a HUGE HUG today my friend.  We are all here if you need to talk, scream, cry, etc.
I too beleive there is another life that awaits us when we pass.  I am sure your friend was greeted by family and friends that love her.



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Posted on Sat, Jul 13, 2013 12:41

I found out Monday the news I was dreading that my neighbor/friend passed on. I say passed on because I don't believe our lives end, our bodies die but we continue.

  
The hardest part is she was still fairly young with 4 kids. Her two youngest boys being about 7 & 8 years old.


Note; i'm having major tech problems so I will type more later.



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Posted on Tue, Jul 02, 2013 20:58

Quoting bepositive:

Hello Jen
Sorry I deleted my last post because I did not want to mention any names in the Forum.  Things appear to be getting "touchy" and "ouchy" on here.  
I would love to hear about Paula Deen and Alec Baldwin..........let er rip!!  lol

Hello Be,

     I totally understand! No worries :) Lol, yes..sensitivity abounds!!  Thanks for your support and stopping by, I appreciate it.  Hope all is well with you and keep in touch!



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Posted on Tue, Jul 02, 2013 15:47

Hello Jen
Sorry I deleted my last post because I did not want to mention any names in the Forum.  Things appear to be getting "touchy" and "ouchy" on here.  
I would love to hear about Paula Deen and Alec Baldwin..........let er rip!!  lol



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Posted on Mon, Jul 01, 2013 23:05

I  may not be on this site too much longer at the rate I'm going. If you don't see my posts any longer than you will know I'm gone but that it was NOT my choice.

Political Correctness gone overboard ?

I was going to type about Paula Deen and Alec Baldwin but I've lost my spunk for the moment.



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Posted on Mon, Jul 01, 2013 13:18

Hi Bepostive and Sunny :)

  Be, I sent you an email about what's going on. Funny you mentioned it. What does umpf mean? I can't figure it out,sorry.
Sunny, I would have sent you a private email too but I still don't have your address. Bepositive, if u have Sunny's address, would u please email it to me.

As far as Vegas goes, it's the one place where anyone can enjoy something!!  I would just be happy to meet the two of you but i think it would be a riot to meet some other members.. and non-members!!



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 Chat now 
Posted on Sun, Jun 30, 2013 21:04

I agree.  Sounds like fun..who knows, maybe we'll meet someone.  :)



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Posted on Sun, Jun 30, 2013 13:13

Quoting bepositive:

Hi Jen,
Just popping in to say HI and that I enjoy reading your posts.  Hope you are having a marvelous summer!!!!  Lets chat soon....:)

Hello Bepositive :)

                  Hope you're doing well.  I'm glad someone enjoys my posts!!  I'm afraid they sometimes tend to be more negative than positive but the good, positive stuff is boring and I don't feel the need to type about it. 

I think we should get some fellow members together and meet in Vegas in the Fall when it's cooler.  What do you think? It's a great location for entertainment and there are deals if you look hard enough.  My daughter gets really good deals at the Hoot*** hotel there.



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Posted on Tue, Jun 25, 2013 07:34

Hi Jen,
Just popping in to say HI and that I enjoy reading your posts.  Hope you are having a marvelous summer!!!!  Lets chat soon....:)



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Posted on Tue, Jun 18, 2013 20:48

More about some aquaintances/friends.  You know I always hated when I would read male profiles that said something negative about baggage and/or drama pertaining to females.  I hate to say it though , I hate found several reasons why those words are used.

Years ago when I was younger and more naive, I would have thought that the adult friends that I would have would be all grown up and act like grown-ups. Unfortunitely this is something that is not true with a good amount of people I know.  Does it have something to do with the state of California?  Yes, I think to a degree it does.  For example, I have one girlfriend who moved from North Carolina because had she gotten divorced there, her whole situation would have been tougher because she may have committed adultery there. Sorry I'm not up for posting why it's different but it is. She did try to patch up her marriage but a couple yrs later (now in 2013) she is getting divorced in CA. Also in the Midwest and BiBle Belt there are more people who have the structure of religion that teaches wrong from right. By no means am I saying people are all better citizens there but my experience in California has been different in general than Michigan.  One more thing to add, my experiences had I stayed in Michigan could bedifferent now just as a sign of the time. Participation in churches,etc is lower, the internet has changed minds and souls,etc.,etc.


Now I do have friends who stay out of trouble and have good family lives BUT because I live in a bedroom community (family oriented and not a metropolitan city) I am limited with having only so many single girlfriends that can go out on the weekends,etc.


Well just when I should be getting to the juicy part, i am gonna have to continue this subject later.



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Posted on Mon, Jun 17, 2013 23:03

Just recieved a message from another Mr. Dumb***. I did try to teach him for the next lady he messages so at least it wasn't wasted time for him.

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Posted on Sat, May 18, 2013 12:41

Last night was disappointing.  Went to the local pub to see a band I like.  Nothing was right.  If you are looking for some positive bull**** here then stop reading.  I'm a slow typist so I will be leaving out some details.

First thing almost made me turn back from entering.  Nutshell version only, two girlfriends who once were friends and now do NOT like each other are both going.  Wouldn't u know, neither one has their own friends showing up so I am their only friend there. Awkward is putting it mildly.


This is what I got to be a part of.  Lonely old man stalker staring at me most of the night.  At some point this jerk made the "come hither" motion with his hand to summon me. That was the last straw, I said no, gave some hand gesture of my own (not the finger) and he finally got the hint.  Now I only have to deal with harmless, drunk old man/bad dancer who is a regular there, said no to him too,.. several times then there was the drunk, young guy who wanted me. Told him he was a couple decades too young, it didn't phase him. He gave up eventually and hit on my girlfriend who has  a bad lack of judgement and kissed him..more than once.  At least she didn't go home with him.


There were a few others, "Married Guy" waiting for his buddies who didn't make it but should have been home with his wife anyway.  Birthday Boy who got too drunk for his own good. There was one more I will not type about. Anyhow, by now you should have gotten the gist of it.  Too old and undesirable, too young and undesirable. Too young and desirable but I won't go there so I lose out. One married guy who may have been desirable but again, I won't go there.



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Posted on Tue, May 07, 2013 17:58

I posted this yesterday on a different site that asks for your First Date idea. There are reasons why I chose my status (you have multiple choices but can't type your own) as a HopeLESS Romantic because it is nearly hopeless. I do have a speck of hope left though :) Read below for part of my reason why.

First Date; Meet at Costco and split our bulk items in half while having some brief small talk as we are waiting in line to pay. You can even claim we ate together if we both manage to try the food samples. Don't forget to show what a gentleman you are by packing my vehicle then we say good-bye and plan to do this every other Wednesday. At least this would be more productive than the Meet & Greet that you can't commit to. I won't even mention the word "date" cuz that would just be too much for you to handle.

* As tempting as his suggestion was to meet him in 10 minutes at Costco (cuz he was already there!), I had to say no. There was no offer to split our purchases, had he thought of that one, I may have actually said yes. If he had been thoughtful enough to bring some ziplock bags (for our split food) I may have fallen instantly in love.


Costco is a step up from the other guy who told me he likes to meet at the gas station where they can both fill their tanks up and in those 4 minutes they have to get to know each other while pumping their gas, if magic doesn't happen then they can both drive off their separate ways.
Both true stories and no, I will not be meeting you or anyone else at either the gas station or Costco.



HA!! I just thought of something. How happy would both of those guys have been had they gotten the combo deal of getting their shopping done (plus free food) at Costco then filling up their tanks at Costco's gas station.

All kidding aside, I think something short and sweet like visiting one of the wineries makes for a great first date, or maybe bowling or miniature golfing.



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Posted on Sat, May 04, 2013 22:54

You know I never met this thread to be all about me. With the exception of a couple of added,interesting posts way back by someone else, it has pretty much been me...all me. I am NOT self-centered!!  I really don't like attention although I am a people person and love conversation.  I was shy as a kid and still work at overcoming it in certain ways.  I am outgoing yet shy, lol, try to figure that one out!!  The need to connect to people is stronger.  Certainly my views and beliefs leave me wanting to find other like-minded friends, of course the ideal would be finding the man I'm also romantically interested in. Did I find these like-minded people? No, very rarely and when I do, they don't live nearby :(  I do have some local friends though, they just don't share in my views for the most part. I do find something in common with them though, enough that we are friends. 

Here is an example of my shyness:  For my one & only wedding, I really did not want to walk down the aisle and have everybody looking at me. I solved that problem and got married outside, up a mountain near a hiking trail, no aisle for me. I really only wanted my mom to be there, I didn't care about the others having to come.  I'm divorced now, I hung in for two decades, more than a decade longer than I should have. I wish I could get some of those years back...sigh..oh well !!



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Posted on Fri, May 03, 2013 12:06

Ahh, I just checked the RSVP guest list. The party seems too good to pass up! Lol, just because those two are heathens it doesn't mean their guests are. I know a few of them well enough to know.
What I wish everyone would do is just state what you are early on. Be forthcoming!! When I think about all the wasted time I have spent online with certain men who misrepresented themselves.  They think that it isn't your business to know when isn't the point TO KNOW? 
One guy tells me on the phone that he has 3 kids, they're 5,8 and 10 years old, he says "I'm sure you can keep up". Hello, I don't want to keep up! We had already planned a date by the time he told me. The date ended up not happening for more than one reason, his fault, not mine.
Another guy claiming how honesty was important to him had someone else's photo posted as his own on his profile.  The phone call was long, he was quite a talker, three hours!  The next day I looked at his profile, he must have decided he was finally time to post his real photos, big disappointment. He was weird on the phone anyway.
I could go on.  Maybe I will later.



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