Try only meeting people who live a certain distance from you and no further. Say within driving distance. Don't waste your valuable time chatting with people you will never meet unless you are only interested in being penpals. BTW Penpals never last long. Never answer unsolicited emails or IMs online. Never date anyone you meet online unless you have your top ten questions already answered prior. Oh and you get to determine what those top ten questions will be. But if you need some help try finding out the basics first.
Where they live
religion or church
plans for relationship or marraige or future with you
financial status or history (debt or BK)
mutual friend referrals
If they cant be straight up with these basic questions then just move on.
Not sure then do a background check on them prior to dating them. We live in a new online dating world. And don't always rely on a Church singles group to safeguard yourself. Some of the most messed up disfunctional people are picked over and left there...lol I know
Just to let the men know it works both ways. Perhaps the men aren't from Africa but they are hiding in their mommies basement looking for a place to live. They "work" from home but really their biggest job is to go to the mail each month to get their cheque, selling stuff on ebay. Gawdddd the list goes on and on.
I use to be a paying member on here, but it became pointless as most men's profiles (and probably vice versa) are full of bull. Age, height, weight allot of shrinking and growing going on between the email, the chat and then the meet. Its hilarious.
The lengths they will go to. I have received an email of ppl who actually claim to be well known ppl or sometimes even ur friends who are in another country and need help. Example...a man who i know by the name of rick scot, who lives at east street conton ground, sends me an email saying he is stuck in africa how he was robbed and needs to get home desperately. (mind u the name and address of the person are real and i actually knew someone by that name... but it wasnt the person). We just have to be careful and always do a background check if its a company. I always try to get a phone number and call in the morning and still in the night(they tend to answer different in the night lol, of course duhhhh its a personal phone and not a company lol
Hey i was just about to post something about scam and i saw urs. Everyday i receive mail from scammers especially from NIGERIA. Anyone who wants you to send money, ur name, address, bank account etc. BE AWARE IT IS A SCAM. No matter how it sounds, they also play on ur emotions by telling u that they are a sick christian who is dying and want u to have their money because they do not trust their family members to use it constructively. HA HA. I can go on and on about the online lottery who wants you to send money to claim ur price...i usually have a good time with them by telling them take it out of the money i win and just send it to be i wont be vex lol olo ha ha. DONT BE FOOLED PEOPLE. I have also called the numbers and know it is not a business or company.
Only he started in Texas which is where he said he lived. Then he went to visit his daughter in Scotland. Sent Pictures of friends and a picture of his daughter.
He had bought oil products and was going to make alot of money on the deal but had to pay sales taxes he had not planned on. He needed more money. He had tapped out his friends that lent him money but he still needed more to complete the deal so he could resale the product. So he said he got a job as a oil Geologist offshore to further finance his oil products.
I was the only one he could turn to he said. Then he wanted me to set up a bank account so he could put the money from his deal in it and he trusted me to do that. Heck he was in love with me.
He made his deal and put 4M in the bank account. Of course you can't get any money out of the bank Account until you pay a $12,000 commission to get the money out. Its a special off shore account. (Right) The account shows his money of 4M in there with Clydesdale Bank. (All a Scam) You even have to log into the account with Clydesdale Bank.
He was suppose to come back to the states in July and still is not back. His phone # was restricted but he gave me, apparently his phone # (Scotland) When he called once he made the mistake of not restricting his Number and I called the operator on the area code and she said it was Nigeria.
SO BEWARE THEY ARE GETTING BETTER AT WHAT THEY ARE DOING. THEY ARE DEFINATELY
Hahaha how true " be aware and beware" read Blink by Malcolm Gladwell. I always follow my gut instinct. and it seems as if you did to; from the beginning you suspected. I know following it to the end is just to assure yourself you were right. hahaha
I also think a lot of people who need attention and affirmation tend to get scammed more so than others. As for trust . . . or not trusting. I never, ever trust anybody. That is something one earns and if I love you, I trust you but that's not something I would extend to the general public. Trusting someone is a very personal feeling. Why anyone would just throw it to the wind and trust or even think that every tom, dick and harry should be trusted automactically, is just beyond rational thinking.
I must have been approached by 30 to 40 'scammers' on this site in 6 months. Most make enough 'mistakes' in their profile to be identified very quickly. Such things as eye and hair colour not matching the photographs is an obvious 'give-away', as is a predeliction for starting sentances wit "Am", rather than "I am". Most, with few exceptions, will ask you to correspond through a private email address from first contact, which makes the task of identifying them very easy. It is very easy to track the registered location of the sending computer, and there are many sites that will do this for free. Most can be traced to Ghana or Nigeria, and the 'contact' has a hard time explaining why, for example, when she lives in the US and is temporarily on business in Indonesia, she's using a computer in Warri! It does provide a little fun diversion on a rainy day, but I would rather be communicating with someone real.
I can't speak for all women. But I get men who must think I'm as dumb as a 2x4!
I own my own business, a 3000 square foot boutique. It's extremely hard work. I'm not a peniless gold digger, party girl, or dumb blonde who's going to fall for the cc email. Semnt out to who knows how many women. In thye hope of catching a few of them.
Neither am I impressed by offers of expensive dinners. I'd rather take myself out and not deal with the BS!
Sifting through the BS is tough and frustrating, so far nothing has been left but the dregs and who wants them!!!
I know I'm about to be scammed when women in their 20's and 30's send me winks along with a line or two telling me that they found my profile interesting. They don't need to be from Africa. All of them, so far, appear to be within the United States. I guess that they think that if an older man is posting here, he's open (and desperate) for anything that comes along.
It gets a little disappointing at times when scammers far outnumber any sincerely interested women. I guess that's a dismal and inclusive part to deal with when you open yourself up to the world at large. I feel for you ladies as well. You're more prone to getting bombarded with this sort of garbage then we men are.
I have been talking to this "female" who went to Africa on business to do some consulting work...
Sounded fishy from the start, but I enjoy a good game every now and then, so I have played along.
Even talked to them on the phone a few times. Well, they were supposed to fly back to the States today, and just like clockwork comes the hook.
They were supposed to be paid in part cash and part check. But when they actually got paid, it was all check and no cash, and low and behold, their credit cards are max'd out...
To validate their story, they even sent me the flight schedule! The daytime contact phone number is listed on there.
It is very odd, that when I goo_gle the phone number of the hotel where the arrangement were made, the only hit I get is for someone selling "a wide variety of ipods and digitall cameras"
When I asked them if they had a digital camera or could get one to take some pictures of Africa for me, they told me that there was very little technology there!!!
I figure if they are scamming me, there might be a possibility that they are scamming some other MM members too.
STORY SOUND FAMILIAR TO ANYONE??? You don't have to post back, but you do have to BE AWARE and BEWARE !!!!
Yes very familiar except mine was slightly different. Very "beautiful" woman from Down Under. She was stuck with an inherited computer that was not capable of doing much of what I asked. She was in a "remote" par of the country and the only way we could talk was via "Relay Phone" (similar to a phone for the hearing impaired). "She" even sent flowers to me. Then the hook. . . I had to adopt her son before we could meet in person and she needed 10 grand to start the process!
Oh, i LOVE these scammers, especially the one from the lady taking care of her sick mom in Africa, but is trying to get back to the states, and really wants to meet you....
I just follow suit, I'll be like yah, I'm in africa too, taking care of my sick dad. If you want we should meet up for coffee, and see what we can do to get back to the states......trust me there will be no second or third email......lol!
It is a pity that some fell prey to this scam and sent money indeed. Hopefully these blogs and forums warn the real members who are here to actually find the right person to share their life with. We also have Nigerian scammers here in South Africa and so too from other parts of the world. The law of supply and demand promotes these individuals to succeed in their "profession".
"You fly your ladies in from all over the world." Just a question: Why do you not fly to their part of the world?
I have had more women from the USA - really be in Africa contact me it isnt even funny ! But I still laugh! They just want to tell you how in love with you they are in the third or forth email, I am sure it is the same for you women out there. Not on this site have I ran into more than 1 maybe 2 but you may think MM site is bad - go try a few other date web sites - they are full of Scammers just looking to prey on the internet date novice.
RULE 1) NEVER - I mean NEVER - send anyone money no matter what these Scammers have cooked up.
Realize - They are professionals. This is their Job. They have been practicing for years. Some are really good at it. I almost sent a woman money, she was in South Africa. Then sure enough, I found her photo, her emails, her phone number ona scammer web site. To those of you men and woman who are fresh from divorce or single and feeling lonely - just be very aware that these Scammers are Professionals and this is their job, this is how they make a living.
I even had a woman email me a photo of her nude to entice me into sending her the money she needed to get from somewhere to Moscow to catch her flight to the USA, before that she even emailed me a copy of her passport. Sometimes they work in groups and are very organized.
Think about this for one minute, they know 9 out of 10 of us will figure out the scam, so they are working everyday, in touch with maybe 40/50 - 100 / people at a time just waiting for that 10% or 5% who will wire them the funds the need so badly for some sad story reason.
One of the latest woman who tried to scam me on was from the UK. Her name is Katherine Cole. Her email is :email@example.com - she needed money for her son who suddenly got ill. When I told her to ask family , not me, the emails stopped. Then I got an email from her 4/5 days later in BIG BOLD Text saying: THANK YOU. - She is actually from another web site I tried and my membership there has not run out yet. She is not on MM web, guys. But she and 1000s like her are out there.
Its all funny stuff, but when you get anyone asking for money, BUT- ITS a SCAM.
Just delete them from your address book and move on.
Informative blog and a good example of what is out there in the world. Being alert all the time is probably the best approach to any new interactions in cyber and in life.
Thank you for the information and so too on the "Scammers etc" blog Brittany. I joined the site recently after investigating a bit and was referred by quite a few. Although I did not expect that the scamming will be high on here it is not a complete shock to me either. No different in real life for that matter.
However, I am still proceeding with full verification on my side but maybe it could be a good option that one of the requirements to join (even for the free membership) should be verified by proof of identity. It will not eliminate all scammers but it should decrease the quantity substantially.
Greetings from beautiful Cape Town, South Africa.
Oh and PS: Personally I would also prefer to be requested to supply certified documentation of a clean criminal record and also see the same on the profiles I interact with.