Would you sign a prenuptual agreement? Long Term Relationship

  • View author's info Posted on Apr 01, 2006 at 09:37 PM


    september1998 write:

    As for a prenuptial. For some it is necessary because of the history of marriage and we still cannot 'read hearts'. Maybe a prenupt with a time frame. For some that would be a security measure. But me personally...only one divorce under my belt and I wanted NOTHING that was his. I have my own and I don't really need anyone elses. So, that being said...if he felt better about it...so be it..but it will work both ways...that's for sure.


    I think I would sign a prenupt if it was like she discribed above. A timed prenupt, maybe one where the prenupt only takes affect after we've been married awhile.
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 01, 2006 at 05:58 PM


    yes..

    What was his before is his and what is"ours ' from the time we cohabitate and live as man and wife marriage is ours..
    It makes sense second marriages which many of us would be going into have a less success rate stastically speaking then that of first marriages and third marriages even less.
    So I would sign one and have an attorney look it over and also many men just want what is earned from point of marriage to be protected especially if they have children from a previous marriage...When you fall out of love you will be glad you had one because it does protect both parties if written well.
    It makes sense..sorry this is how it has to be,,
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 29, 2006 at 06:54 PM


    PiratePrince writes: "Do you have a will? Why bother with one of those? After all, it's not fun to think about your own death, or decided who get's your gandmother's wedding ring or the ferrari. I'd much rather spend a weekend in Paris than sort through that mess."

    It is irresponsible to say 'forget the will'. And it is not as funny if you are the one holding the baggage left behind when someone dies.

    As for a prenuptial. For some it is necessary because of the history of marriage and we still cannot 'read hearts'. Maybe a prenupt with a time frame. For some that would be a security measure. But me personally...only one divorce under my belt and I wanted NOTHING that was his. I have my own and I don't really need anyone elses. So, that being said...if he felt better about it...so be it..but it will work both ways...that's for sure.
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 24, 2006 at 05:06 AM


    Today everyone should be required by law to sign as a condition of marriage.

    This could eliminate many mariages and reduce the divorce rate.
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 17, 2006 at 07:14 PM


    thegoodlife421 write:
    Saw this topic come up on another thread and thought I'd start a new one here.

    Seems some women seem hurt and offended by the very suggestion of a prenup. I, on the other hand, think it's a sensible move because it protects BOTH parties.

    What do YOU think?

    I would sign one...
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 15, 2006 at 12:33 PM


    Yes, but with stips. What was yours before the marriage is yours after but what we build together is ours.I am not the type of woman who would be happy just sitting around the house sipping on drinks everyday I need something to do, weather it's helping you run your $1,000,000.00 company or starting my own.If you are worth $2,000,000.00 when I married you and $10,000,000.00 after am I not entitled to something??? And on the flip side of that what if I started my own company from the money you given me when we were married and now my company is worth far more then yours aren't you the man entitled to half?Or NOT. If my love and support helped in you building your company and your funds helped in me building my company are we not entitled to half of the profits we build while we were together?? And even if I had not worked a day in my life was not my love, and support worth something?? Now don't get me wrong I am not saying anyone should get half but there are alot of factors to look in to at the end of a marriage that is not as cut and dry as a prenuptual.

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  • View author's info Posted on Mar 13, 2006 at 07:23 AM


    As a lawyer , I think prenups are essential in anticipating the sort of problems that will plague all marriages which no one in love would be in the mood to do. But if couples before marriage sit down logically to address all these issues and the responsibilities and the rights encumbent on each party to the union , then there will be less issues and less grounds for the marriage to break up in future.

    If in fact in the process of discussion on the terms of a prenup, both parties begin to have doubts about each other or are unhappy about it, certainly it would be the very issues that will surface later to erode that union if not addressed earlier and if both can't come to any solution then it would be less painful not to proceed with the marriage.
    The prenup could be the acid test to your love and the sensitive aspect that binds or breaks the proposed union.
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 12, 2006 at 12:11 PM


    To be honest, I really don't care one way or the other. If it made the other person feel better, I'd be happy to sign one. I don't want them or their friends or family worried that I am after their money. What they have they have worked for, not me. If I love them, I love them and money can not buy that from me.

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  • View author's info Posted on Mar 12, 2006 at 11:59 AM


    Yes, I would sign a prenuptial agreement. Matter fact, my ex and I signed one before we were married. When we divorced he wasn't able to take away my stuff or money, I had before the marriage. If we hadn't signed one, he could have taken me to the cleaners. And, at that time he probably would have. If you truly love each other and want to spend the rest of your life together, then there should be no problem protecting yourselves.
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 11, 2006 at 08:36 AM


    Absolutlely. Marriage ALWYAS ends. Now, before you attack me, I'm not talking about love, I'm talking about marriage. Marriage is by definition a legal contract. Marriage may end after 65 years when one of the partners dies, or it might end a few weeks after the Vegas wedding when someone decided 'it's just not working out'. The point is, all marriages end one way or another.

    Do you have a will? Why bother with one of those? After all, it's not fun to think about your own death, or decided who get's your gandmother's wedding ring or the ferrari. I'd much rather spend a weekend in Paris than sort through that mess.

    So, do the easy thing and forget the will. Let your heirs fight about how to divide up all of your stuff in the middle of their grief (or in some cases their celebration).

    The same goes for a prenup. Why have have a difficult conversation with your new love? After all, marriage is all about good feelings and fun right? Why throw cold water on this beautiful romance? Then if something does go horribly wrong with the union, you and your kids can fight with her and her kids about all of the stuff later on. It will be fun for everyone really. Especially fun the the lawyers - who at the end of the process will be the only ones that can afford the trip to Paris. :)
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 07, 2006 at 12:05 PM


    I would sign one, I am not out to use anyone, I want love....and if it takes that to make him happy I would do it in a second....I am not fake and shallow, but love and money together is nice...
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 06, 2006 at 05:48 AM


    id sign a pre nup i think its a gud idea it protects both sides as long as its what they want
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 05, 2006 at 06:06 PM


    tanamaria write:
    if it is the real deal, then why dispute?? its just a lil' ol' piece of paper to protect everybody all around, right?? unless you've got something to hide????


    No it's not a Lil' ol' piece of paper.
    Even though I've been cleaned out before, I think that if you have to sign a prenup it's a sure sign that you PROBABLY shouldn't marry. Besides if you marry a person with bad credit don't you marry their debt?- guess I'm the only one to fall into that trap, huh? So why shouldn't you benefit from the good as well. Furthermore marriage is a contract in itself and prenups contradict the terms of that agreement. With all that being said, I'd like to redirect your attention to the word in all caps at the beginning of my statement- Yes I'd consider signing one if asked but I wouldn't ask someone else to.

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  • View author's info Posted on Dec 31, 2005 at 03:02 PM


    thegoodlife2005 write:
    Saw this topic come up on another thread and thought I'd start a new one here.

    Seems some women seem hurt and offended by the very suggestion of a prenup. I, on the other hand, think it's a sensible move because it protects BOTH parties.

    What do YOU think?





    No, I would not...and If he won't want to marry me because of that decision...

    Then he does not love me enough to know that I love him enough to marry him for LOVE....NOT for love of his money....
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 30, 2005 at 05:04 PM


    I would most definitely sign a prenup and I would expect him to do the same.

    Ok you love each other, but what happens down the track when loves leaves and complacancy sets in???

    I have been badly burnt in past relationships, with the naive belief that "hey, we are in love and he would not take my money and run" HHAAAHH how wrong I was, and now am left struggling to suport myself.

    Prenups are a neccesity to protect yourself. I do wish they were in existance in Australia when I needed them. But, no use in crying over spilt milk.
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 30, 2005 at 03:34 PM


    Dorma,

    I feel for you,all divorce has a price whether we want to admit it or not...our conscious will always walk on this path of life with a scar no one else will fully know but your heart.

    The strangest part is the one who seem to believe in the success of this union is usually the one who is hurt the most.

    Sad you are going through such a struggle too...all I can say, my prayers are with you for the peace and tranquility of your soul.

    BQ
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 30, 2005 at 02:19 PM


    dormavirgo write:
    I wish I had signed a pre nup with my wealthy x to be so he would have disclosed his assets and I would have known what I was going to walk away with.
    Now I am sure I am going to have to force him to disclose his net worth and doing this will be like pulling teeth out of a damn lions mouth.
    I loved my husband and when I entered this marriage overseas I didn't think what would happen in the event of divorce and custody.naive me
    Now I know my rights or lack of them in the midst of a divorce.

    I feel anyone getting married now days get the attorneys involved before hand if there is serious money involved ..most likely if this is a second marriage for the man he has been sadly burned before and will not likely let it happen again EGO
    sorry its better to do this while the stars are in your eyes and you are in love getting the attorneys involved to protect interests of both parties.

    And many men entering second marriages may have children from the previous marriage the only child my x has is with me and I know he will protect our childs interest and I hope if he remarries for my sons sake and his inheritance that he has a pre-nup.
    Many Men who have children will insist you sign a pre-nup.
    No man is going to want to have his children battling a step mom over money and I know my husband plans to leave everything to our child.
    My x was taken to the cleaners by his previous x wife in a childless marriage.

    While we were married and he is buying pricey properties he is putting them in company names and having me be a supposed director.The companies are him for tax purposes but I have to go to banks and pull records tax receipts and my x is an X Sr partner for Price WaterhouseCooper and a great Accountant.Ugh so sure he can fix booksa nd hide assets..would he YES
    I just think marriage sadly must be entered like a business deal .
    Because stastics after every divorce that second and third marriages have an even less success rate then first time marriages.
    And if I marry a wealthy man who has children who he wants to protect I would sign a Pre nup period with an understanding protecting myself to.
    I would be sensitive that he wants to protect his childrens inheritance and this is why most men do this .


    We all enter marriage with a dream of love toward one another, it will last till the end of our days and many other blissful thoughts...not even thinking about what could happen..we just throw these thoughts in the back of our mind and we don't want to entertain such negative possibilities etc.. as it spoils the dream, a blissful union and you think...he or she would never do that. Well, I guess most of us are evidence it does happen otherwise we wouldn't be here wishing for a union which would be an horizonal blissful walk fulflling destiny greatest heart desires LOVE and to be LOVED with mutual respect and understanding.

    BQ
    .
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 30, 2005 at 01:56 PM


    thegoodlife2005 write:
    One more thing: Stepmothers and stepchildren in a high-asset family are like cats and dogs: Natural enemies. A prenup can smooth your relationships with his/her children. It makes them feel less threatened, more safe. I'd be happy to sign a prenup to keep his kids from hating me!

    That said, I would NEVER sign a prenup that left me "nothing," unless I did something really really BAD to deserve nothing. My time, my love, my affection are worth a lot, and I deserve recognition/support for the devotion I gave to him for as long as it lasted.

    Someone (I forget who) asked the men if they would sign a prenup that included a promise of fidelity and a financial "price" for cheating. Personally, I think such a prenup would be a thing of beauty to behold! If my husband trades me in for two 25-year olds on my 50th birthday he's gonna pay . . . LOL . . .


    Yep ! you are right about step children doing everything in there power to make your life miserable if you get on a wrong wave with them.

    Someone (I forget who) asked the men if they would sign a prenup that included a promise of fidelity and a financial "price" for cheating. Personally, I think such a prenup would be a thing of beauty to behold! If my husband trades me in for two 25-year olds on my 50th birthday he's gonna pay . . . LOL . . .

    Heard some of my friends friend in Vancouver had done some agreement like this, adds some soothing to your soul I would presume but a good way to make them think twice about the price if they did cheat...nobody goes into marriage to be cheated on but it happens.

    BQ
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 30, 2005 at 10:36 AM


    BQ write:

    robtest write:
    GeminiDi write:
    LOL Niceguy.

    Here comes my PollyAnna theory. lol

    I don't think I would. If someone has the SLIGHTEST doubt that I don't love him for himself, he doesn't need to marry me and vice versa. Marriage to me is VERY serious, and I don't think I could enter into it with the "business arrangement" made beforehand. It somehow taints the sanctity and beauty of that blessed union and spells distrust -- at least in my eyes and in my heart.

    I think it would haunt my marriage and would be in the back of my mind throughout. Where is the faith??? Where is the trust???

    Yes, I realize that people have been burned by greedy ex-spouses. Others of us have been hurt in other ways. Does that mean we go about life with distrust in our hearts? I can't. I just approach this thing called "love" a LOT more cautiously than I did in my youth!!

    Yep, yep, yep! Call me a PollyAnna. I'm used to it. LOL

    (No offense to anyone here!!!) But, I prefer my outlook to the bitter cynicism I have encountered from those with an opposing view.

    Gem


    Wouldn't that be PollyDiAnna ? :o)


    I am with you on the Trust, or lack thereof. If we have to have an additional contract outside of our word to each other, then let's just forget the whole deal. Perhaps if we just went back to "'til death do us part" thing, people would take marriage with a proper seriousness.

    "I would climb any mountain, swim any ocean, fight any wild beast, but keep your hands off my wallet" just has a hollow ring to it...

    Of course, you know what they say about dreamy pisces and money... LOL



    "I would climb any mountain, swim any ocean, fight any wild beast, but keep your hands off my wallet" just has a hollow ring to it...

    Very Funny Rob...yes, TRUST is a big factor but how can you know if TRUST is as cherished in your lover heart as your's? Do you have any standard of measurement which you can show me? I'm all ear. Any gold digger can con you. There is a lot of statistic about it.

    Any feedback ?

    BQ


    You can't look them in the eyes and read their soul??? One of my biggest problems in life is not believing what I see there, or believing that the white knight/boy scout can make it all better...
  • View author's info Posted on Dec 30, 2005 at 07:50 AM


    One more thing: Stepmothers and stepchildren in a high-asset family are like cats and dogs: Natural enemies. A prenup can smooth your relationships with his/her children. It makes them feel less threatened, more safe. I'd be happy to sign a prenup to keep his kids from hating me!

    That said, I would NEVER sign a prenup that left me "nothing," unless I did something really really BAD to deserve nothing. My time, my love, my affection are worth a lot, and I deserve recognition/support for the devotion I gave to him for as long as it lasted.

    Someone (I forget who) asked the men if they would sign a prenup that included a promise of fidelity and a financial "price" for cheating. Personally, I think such a prenup would be a thing of beauty to behold! If my husband trades me in for two 25-year olds on my 50th birthday he's gonna pay . . . LOL . . .
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