Why are beautiful woman still single? Message Board

  • View author's info posted on Oct 25, 2010 00:16


    For the same reason good looking men are still single. Money can't buy chemistry.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 18, 2010 12:51


    What are my expectations?

    I want a man who is happy and self-confident; one who gets what he wants himself rather than relying upon others to get it for him or boo-hoo-hooing about how he can't get it for himself. It dawned on me that most wealthy men have this characteristic, as 85% of wealthy peoole made their own fortunes rather than inheriting them. To make your own fortune, you must be confident, happy, hard-working, smart-thinking, outside the box, and energetic. No sitting about on your tush waiting for life to hand you a lottery winning number, no moaning about how you've lost your job, no whinging about how small your retirement benefits will be. You create your own winning streak, create your own job, create your own security. That's the reason I've joined a site that hitches up wealthy dudes with not-so-wealthy ladies. I joined this one in particular since it looks like a lot of the fellahs on here are looking for soulmates rather than 25 year old baby making trophy wives.

    I'm not asking my man to do anything I wouldn't do. When I wanted a job and couldn't find one, I started my own company and now make more money than I ever did as an employee. When I found myself single, I went out and MET people. I work hard. I enjoy life, taking many holidays a year. And so many people I meet can't keep up with me; I'm thinking a self-made man can.

    If I were still in my teens or twenties, a good match for me might be poor because he hasn't yet made his mark on the world. But I'm in my 40's, and I want to date a man around my age, and a man my age is going to have gone past potential and have made something of himself. So no, while I don't really want to date a rich man, I do want to date a confident, secure, happy, self-reliant man and the odds of him also being a poor man by his early fifties is practically nil.

    Why women don't want to accept the character of guys that are attracted to them?

    Whimps are attracted to me. Civil service workers. Council politicians. Students. Nurds. They see my strong personality and think they could lean on me for support. But a man has to feel like he's the one in charge of the relationship, and when the blokes lean on me, voila! they transfer responsibility to be and lo and behold, all of a sudden I'm in charge. And if I'm in charge, they're unhappy. So while weak men are very attracted to me, I'm saying no to Beta and Omega males from now on and only dating Alphas.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 16, 2010 23:16


    Olivetree

    True there are men out there just as you speak. You seek the guy that works for you while some men like my self are looking women just like fit for fun who are strong, successful, confident and beautiful. However, I like many guys are looking for her but one that also respects the role men have in a relationship and does not emasculate him to gain empowerment or challenge his masculinity by not letting him lead and decide for her. I think a women can help a man make decisions without stripping him of his ability to make her feel secure while with him. He is the head while she is the neck which the head rotates.

    If he does not stroke you daily with affirmation and encouragement you should keep looking. While successful , confident women with a high self esteem may prefer a man just like themselves makes sense, unfortunely he may not be looking for a person just like himself. He is looking for a person he may want to control or be submissive to him ie: a trophy wife. Good luck with that. This very well may be the issue with Fit for Fun and many beautiful women who are still single.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 09, 2010 14:09


    FitFun,

    Thanks for being straightforward and plainspoken.  After all, we're adults looking for partners.

  • View author's info posted on Oct 06, 2010 19:53


    FitFunBlonde is really my type, but too bad she is a woman while I am looking for a man. lol

    I would really appreciate a man who is besides all other traits, confident and has high self esteem. I work as a professional, at the same time run my new company in a non-related field as President. Don't call me workaholic as I am not. I don't count how many hours I have to work or how late I have to stay. If there is work needs to done, then it has to be done. Very simple. More often, in order to discuss issues with my far-east suppliers, the only good time is even after midnight!

    I also like dannyspl's comment from a man's point of view. Lucky for men, many women are wired (or re-wired) the way that men want them to be wired. I would feel extremely lucky if there is a man out there who would stroke me daily with encouragement and support. :)

    After all, it seems like there are a small group of women, who are beautiful, confident and successful but still single, because they are not wired just to stroke the man daily with encouragement. What they need is someone who can stand beside them equally, with confidence and strength, support each other and encourage each other.

    But such men are as rare and precious as top Cs diamond.
  • View author's info posted on Oct 04, 2010 09:14


    And I completely agree Lucky

    BTW you don't look at all 62 I think most here would agree. More like 45. Any guy should appreciate that among the many other qualities you have to offer him.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 30, 2010 22:36


    Fit

    I was being a bit sarcastic but what man would not enjoy being asked out and dated by a woman? In reality it just doesn't happen much.

    You just may be the best example of why I started this thread. You seem to be strong , independent, a bit controlling and beautiful and you are tired of men you consider weak or ones that can't keep up. If I were to interview your past dates I wonder what they would say about you? I wonder if they would say you are too independent, controlling or even tends to emasculate any chance you get by criticizing or judging.If done continually that alone can lower a mans self worth and give him low self esteem even if he truly loves her. Instead of going through the revolving door of dating different men you might want to try just treating them different than what you have been doing. You really should find out what a man really wants in a longterm relationship and cater to it. Lust and the satisfying sex will not keep him around long but loving him and making him feel important to you will. Even a strong confident man can fill weak if he is falling in love. If it is just lust he will not stay around long no matter what you do.

    But again you just may be the reason beautiful women are still single. Advise terrible or not, for many it seems to work and they will benefit from it with a long lasting loving relationship. Treat him better than you have and you may be happy instead of bitter. I focus on her needs and she focuses on mine in a love situation it can last for many years. I personally avoid a controlling women who emasculates through her actions and if she herslf has a hidden low self esteem which may be the real cause for her issue with men.





    My best suggestion would be this...On the first date or even the first and second date. Keep it simple. No dinner. No show No fuss with the expense. Say no to the expensive things at the beginning.When Guys spend a lot on a woman they WILL EXPECT MORE FROM YOU LATER ON. Don't put yourself in the position and the possiblity in their mind that they will get any on the first few dates by letting them spoil you rotten at the beginning. Trust me that puts things on a new level and different perspective for him. Cause in the past it may have worked on other ladies. There will be plenty of time for all the fun and expense later on when you both have blended your chemistry. If this is no good for you then just enjoy the lust, the expensive date and his expectation of sex from you later. And the disrespect and bad treatment toward you again when he invests his time and mucho money and gets nothing he expects in return from you.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 30, 2010 22:18


    Rtt's


    Howeverrrr... You won't settle might be a case of narcissism. You think you deserve him cause you know you are worth it. Question is does he? Hope you are not one of the many who reach eighty and wonder if not settling was worth the loneliness and pride. Do you think women like Liz Taylor thought she was settling each time she married her 8 husbands? I bet you she thought each one was Mr Right. Mr Right is only right as long as your emotions say so. Why do you think some women are attracted to badboys? Remember many women want to change her guy. Most Men just want to tolerate their women.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 28, 2010 13:41


    Im single now for 8 years because there was no chemistry between me and the men ive met...
    no im not that picky or difficult
    im simply trying to be a good woman..but no
    man will take the time to get to know me without getting sex or intimacy so ive experienced...
  • View author's info posted on Sep 21, 2010 16:34


    Well Danny we ask a lot to get a lot.

    Most of us, dont expect to get all we ask for

    it's like a wishing list, men always tall, beautiful and blonde

    many dont know what they want at all, just like us, sometimes

    we aren't sure either..You can come back to the site next week

    and find the same woman has tweeked her profile..

    Men or women all want the highest standards when looking for a mate.

    Just what i think  

  • View author's info posted on Sep 20, 2010 23:40


    RRTs

    You should wait and let the guy make the first move. It is a test to see if he can over come his fear of possible rejection. Or he is not attracted to you yet. Then flirt by giving eye contact or smile then turn away. Or even begin a simple conversation not expecting anything. For many guys this opens the door to approach you. If he is attracted to you and you open the door by flirting, He will make the first move if he knows what he wants. If he is afraid of rejection he may have a low self esteem and you really dont want to deal with that at least not at the first glance.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 17, 2010 01:36


    Hey fun Thank you for your post. The question is sincere and directed to women who see themselves as beautiful. But many women see themselves as beatiful in many ways so I left it open. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder right? So as I posted earlier if you think you are beautiful that is all that matters even if others see you as average or below average in looks. Real beauty is on the inside anyways.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 16, 2010 20:33


    The reason I am still single is because I refuse to settle. I don't expect to find a man who is perfect or rich, because I'm neither. I want a best friend and partner. I find it so hard to meet men who I have chemistry with. Not that Im saying looks are not important, because to some degree they are, butI have found that chemistry can make someone attractive.
    Your last post implies that pretty women are unrealistic, which is, in my case anyway, not true. I find that quality men do not approach me but quys who wouldn't have a chance in hell(geriatric, toothless, jobless, married, etc.),are bolder. I guess I'm old fashioned but is it too much to ask for to expect a man to make the first move? I am not haughty acting and I'm friendly so I've come to the conclusion that good guys are too afraid of rejection where the "other" guys feel they have nothing to lose.
    I want to know that a man thinks I'm worth the effort and will go out of his way to show me. I'm not talking about jumping through hoops or something crazy, just a little southern charm. When this guy finally comes along and we hit it off, he will be one happy guy and all because I am worth it.

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  • View author's info posted on Sep 16, 2010 07:33


    Why not dream

    As you know men are not complicated or high maintenance. What they have a problem with is expressing themselves emotionally. Opening up is the biggest complaint women have about men period. But also women are looking for a guy who is sensitive, a good listener, can relate to their issues without trying to solve ot fix them all the time. And who is emotionally available. The things I said below in regard to what men want is very much the same as what women want. Isn't that ironic? The same things that can make a relationship work for both.

    The problem again is men just don't say it. Since they don't say it women think they don't need it. That is huge!

    But once a man opens up about his feelings and what he wants and he is with a women who actually cares about his feelings and needs, the ingrediants for a longterm loving relationship are in place. Now they just need to work their issues out.

    But to get back to the topic, Some beautiful women or women who say no to men more than they get no from them...lol really don't see men as beings with feelings and emotional needs. They are usually... more interested in what men can do to serve them. And not what they can do to serve the relationship or men. Their expectations are rather high and they feel they deserve it cause they are above average in looks or even acheivements. I say acheivements too cause it seems to be the case more and more as women challenge men in the work force and business. But then women complain about their expectations not being met or a low self esteem man or a man with low confidence.

    Ladies you pick these men to know and have relationships with then complain as if they just changed before your eyes.

    Another thing I see is women are usually looking to change something about their guy they see and don't like. Men on the other hand are just looking to tolerate what ever they see or know about their woman.

    To all you ladies who are fed up, bitter, intoleratant or just tired of men. Whether you are pretty or not really doesn't matter the most to a guy. Ya I said it! Looks are important visually but really when you get down to what a guy really wants beauty is always within first then the outside will reflect the inside. I've seen this over and over with myself. I find it crAZY and ironic that I can be attracted to a woman on the outside but she can not get me aroused at all. But an average looking woman who I am so so about visually can bring out a being within herself so sexy and exciting on the inside through her personality, flirting, sex appeal, caring, listening, humor, laughterand she is even a bit overweight.... so what! She gets me going to much I can't control my self. She can blow away any super model type that has a dull personality, high expectations, emasculates men at any chance which I call a primadonna princess.

    The day you stop expecting your looks to drive men to any level you want and begin showing them you from the inside out who you really are and care about them , you will land any guy you ever dreamed of.

    All the money, high class, and high materials from men will never satisfy you longterm. The more you give to him your self, time, careing and keep him happy, the happy you will be too cause he will WANT to swim through shark infested waters to bring you lemonade. And I really mean that.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 16, 2010 07:29


    I didn't say she would have to ASK him to swim. He will WANT TO cause that is the feeling he has toward her for all she is to him. The most. The kind that makes a 30, 40 and 50 + year realtionship thrive.

    In this day and age men just want their feelings and opinions and actions to be

    valued
    appreciated
    acknowledged
    supported
    and themselves affirmed daily

    and very much the same as what women want.

    This is what is missing in the 50% divorce rate currently.

    That is not high maintenance. It's called love which takes lots of work and is not motivated by money, celebrity, fame, politics or LOOKS.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 16, 2010 07:27


    Quoting whynotdream:

    Any woman who would ask her man to swim through shark infested waters to bring her lemonaide is a high-maintenance woman. 

    It's interesting in that I think I understood your posts, but did you mine?

    I don't disagree with what you're trying to say, but it concerns me that you just might be bitter with "pretty" women.  Is that the case?  That would be a shame, because I know some beautiful women, who become even prettier when you get to know them.  Unfortunately, I've also seen them with egotistical, but initially charming, men, who will never recognize the woman's inner beauty, because they're more concerned with the initial physical impact she'll have on those around him, rather than the emotional impact she could have on him, if afforded the opportunity.  More women than not want to be recognized for the qualities they hold near and dear, not their physical beauty.  So, in short, yes, those women do exist, but so do those men, and one day, if they're lucky, they'll meet and live shallowly happily ever after - until of course the plastic surgeon run's out of tricks. 




    Then she is again in so many cases selecting the WRONG guy to date or be with.

    That is your responsiblitiy not the guys.

    Read my posts below and you will see I check the inner beauty first as I get older and think less of looks now cause of all I have mentioned here.
  • View author's info posted on Sep 10, 2010 08:13


    Any woman who would ask her man to swim through shark infested waters to bring her lemonaide is a high-maintenance woman. 

    It's interesting in that I think I understood your posts, but did you mine?

    I don't disagree with what you're trying to say, but it concerns me that you just might be bitter with "pretty" women.  Is that the case?  That would be a shame, because I know some beautiful women, who become even prettier when you get to know them.  Unfortunately, I've also seen them with egotistical, but initially charming, men, who will never recognize the woman's inner beauty, because they're more concerned with the initial physical impact she'll have on those around him, rather than the emotional impact she could have on him, if afforded the opportunity.  More women than not want to be recognized for the qualities they hold near and dear, not their physical beauty.  So, in short, yes, those women do exist, but so do those men, and one day, if they're lucky, they'll meet and live shallowly happily ever after - until of course the plastic surgeon run's out of tricks. 

  • View author's info posted on Sep 09, 2010 21:43


    I don't know if I agree with your theory.  You're thinking that there are a disproprtionate amount of pretty women single vs. average or below average women? 

     

    Could it be that you, being the awesome male you are, be noticing the pretty ones more often than others?  Possible, isn't it?

     

  • View author's info posted on Aug 23, 2010 08:16


    Fit for Blonde

    Try asking the guy out to somewhere or just coffee and pay for it. Or take him out to dinner and concert and pay for it. that will cost around 250.00 + That way you will not feel scammed anymore and you will be in charge from the start. Women too often forget about the financial investment men make in the dating process but still feel scammed as you state when they don't get their expectations met. Try looking at dating through a mans point of view once. Men pay to get rejected and criticized and sometimes they pay dearly. If they won't commit much of the reason could be they have a low self esteem. Build them up. men need to be stroked daily with encouragement, support and affirmation appreciated. It is just the way we are wired.

    Their insecurity and vulnerability is constantly being challenged by their desire to please their partner. Now think about that for a moment. This is big for a guy. Keeping a man happy will ensure that he will not want to stray from a love relationship and cheat like so many do. Their women can help tremendously in this area. Again hat is just the way men are wired. For once really take care to what he thinks and feels cause he is terrible on expressing it in the right way. That's why you women get so frustrated.
  • View author's info posted on Aug 23, 2010 07:28


    Thanks - I think?

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