Why are beautiful woman still single? Message Board Forward to friends

  • View author's info Posted on Aug 17, 2012 at 10:47 AM


    It is a U.S. trend to not marry.  The highest percentage of women up to age 44 who have never married was among blacks (55%), followed by U.S.-born Hispanics (49%), Asians (39%) and whites (34%).
    Source: National Center for Health Statistics
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 01, 2012 at 09:58 PM


    Women who are 25-45 seem to not look for LOVE anymore, and ALL men any age is the same way.
    Most men, even older men, seem to be looking for that 25-35 yr old woman but it seems that women that age group don't want to settle unless the man has money and can give her LOTS of attention, praise, and tell her countless ways how stunning she looks. Im not speaking this for all women but a majority of them.
    Younger women want that sense of financial security but aren't really into the relationship for the RIGHT reasons and that is "to find true love" and although they maybe attending college at the time you meet they still want that financial security which is not a good start to a relationship.  They also demand more attention cause you have to remember they are younger and no matter how gorgeous they may be or HOT, most have ALOT of insecurities and constantly need the attention from men to feel more attractive and not just with the man they are with at that moment. They also feel as if they are in competition to look better than such and such's wife/girlfriend so they demand more bling so they can "look better". Alot of the insecurities lead to them not being trustworthy of you thinking you will be the same way, which can lead to relationship problems and so they can't hold a relationship in that aspect as well.
    If you are with a woman that is over 40, most women have outgrown all the physical  insecurities and have learn to accept their appearance, they usually financially doing ok on their own and aren't searching JUST for the money but  more for LOVE and don't really care if any other man other than who they are with "take notice"of her. Shes happier in her own skin.
    I am not saying bad things about women 25-45 and again this isn't directly toward all women in that age category. Just experience from what I have observed over the years.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 29, 2012 at 05:37 AM


    I feel like the upbringing of men has definitely changed. Being part of the younger generation its actually quite sad. Now a days it kind of seems like the men are looking to have a woman who contributes 50% to bills and 100% to the home. The way I see it....I can do that by myself.  I either have encounters with guys that work, work, work and feel that as long as they pay for things for you they don't have to be around or the guy that always wants to be around and has no intent to make a living to support himself. So to sum it all up, its harder to find a good guy now a days. Way more rotten apples. Patience is key....and a virtue.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 23, 2012 at 08:29 PM


    Yes...Maybe high expectations of wanting someone honest and faithful. Isn't that what most people want?
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 22, 2012 at 09:50 PM


    They either expect much more out of a man than they themselves can provide, or they're smart enough to know what they want and patient enough to wait for it.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 21, 2012 at 11:13 PM


    Quoting 16Penelope:

    We may single because they/men are looking for a second mother - maybe he is still living at home with his  parents.  maybe his casual drinking is more than casual and just looking for a new drinking buddy - likes her independent ways when first meet but then he become insecure because of her independence - maybe still stuck in his immature ways thinking he can play as he did in his 20's - maybe he may lack maturity and confidence choosing to be with younger ladies old enough to be their daughters - maybe once comfortable in relationship they become couch potatoes - maybe once they reach thei age of approx 50 they want to relive their teen years or try to hold on to youth by behaving as such - chivalry has been completly thrown out the door by men that or their parents have never taught them anything about it  - some men out their are just cons... - I can go on with many more reasons why beautiful women on the inside and out are single.

    Penelope don't forget  you have experienced first hand all those things about the man you were involved with.
    You are getting to know him more and more where you discover those things you speak. So at what point do you say I do not want a man like this?  But you continue to be with such a man even when you say he becomes a couch potato. All I can say is either you may be enabling him in some way or you are being codependent for some reason from your past. Either way you picked him to know and continue to stay with him. Before you can describe the negative character of such a man you need to take some responsibility for picking him and staying with him as long as you did.
    Men don't change unless they want to but I bet you thought you could change him as soon as you began to experience his juvenial behavior. I could be wrong with that assumption but in many cases that is an accurate assumption.

    Women, you can not change men and their behavior but you can have a powerful influence toward his behavior and actions. Your behavior and actions toward him daily may be the most important way you can hope he may change his ways. But at some time you need to move on if he chooses not to change his ways.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 18, 2012 at 01:16 PM


    I have no plans to remarry and I am not afraid to be alone but it's nice to have someone who you can snuggle with on the couch on a Sunday night and watch a move or to fall asleep in someone's armsor my fav is to make him feel like the greatest man on the planet and that he is everything to me. Give lots of kisses.  xxxxo Affection that's what it is all about!
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 17, 2012 at 07:08 PM


    OMG Girl, you hit the nail on the head!
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 16, 2012 at 10:08 PM


    We may single because they/men are looking for a second mother - maybe he is still living at home with his  parents.  maybe his casual drinking is more than casual and just looking for a new drinking buddy - likes her independent ways when first meet but then he become insecure because of her independence - maybe still stuck in his immature ways thinking he can play as he did in his 20's - maybe he may lack maturity and confidence choosing to be with younger ladies old enough to be their daughters - maybe once comfortable in relationship they become couch potatoes - maybe once they reach thei age of approx 50 they want to relive their teen years or try to hold on to youth by behaving as such - chivalry has been completly thrown out the door by men that or their parents have never taught them anything about it  - some men out their are just cons... - I can go on with many more reasons why beautiful women on the inside and out are single.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 16, 2012 at 05:22 PM


    I don't believe this was a trick question becaues my man was all those things to me and I was all those things to him.  I am the diamond in the rough and if I am ever lucky to men a real man again he will feel like a king.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 15, 2012 at 12:20 AM


    Nothing wrong at all with expectations.  I have them. If I didn't I would have been married to the first women I met a long time ago. Actually one expectation was time.  I wanted to wait to marry so I could give quality time to my kids as they grew up.  After they both finished HS then I was serious. But most of the Ladies I met wanted to get married. 

    Like I mentioned before have your expections just don't let him know what they are.  Some women want the guy to know asap.  Why?  So you can scare him off or screen him out.  You should have already screened him before you said yes to that first date. From that point on you are showing him you are interested in knowing him deeper and deeper.  If you want kids and he doesn't why go out with him?  For a free meal?  Hey some do that.  I've experienced it.  Like I said I avoid women who hold a sign with their expectations of men so everyone can see.  That is a red flag to any guy.  Watchout she is telling you she is critical  and judgemental. And much of the expectations women have are doing just that.  What guy wants a women who makes him feel devalued or even emasculates him so she can gain power in the relationship.

    Ladies, Men want to fell VALUED  from day one.  We love to get stroked daily with affirmations.  It's just the way WE are wired. We want to know we are the leader, the goto guy, the fixer, problem  solver. The man in the relationship that wears the pants. We want appreciation, acknowledgement, support and encouragement from our ladies.  If we get these things you will not be single long cause there are very few of you that can offer these qualites in the way that will assure we do not stray, withdraw, get into porn, work overtime or want to hang with our buddies all the time.  We will want to be with you cause we will want more of what you can give. TO ME  that is truly  beatiful woman.

    Again beautiful women can be any woman who sees herself as beautiful in anyway. I know it was a trick question.  It's how she treats her man that keeps her single or married.

  • View author's info Posted on Jun 12, 2012 at 09:12 PM


    and I am single because he passed away from cancer.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 12, 2012 at 09:10 PM


    Well, I am now 46 and single again after 27 years of devoted marrage and never ever being with another man in my life I find myself here looking for love.  I can only speak for myself and I will say I do have standards but I don't think they are high.  I am 5'7" and I prefer a man at least 5'11" and taller because when I wear heals anyone under that height is shorter then me. This may sound foolish but it's my standard.  I don't like when I chat with a man and he starts right into the sex talk this is a turn off for me since I have only had relations with one man and if I ever meet that next special man I will be ready without being degraded.  I would also like a man that has a "JOB" yes guys a job.  I have been on a few dates where it turned out the man lied and didn't have a job and only wanted to attach himself to me for financial security.  My age restriction is between 47 and 60 because age to me is not a big deal but he has to be at least my age or older I am not interested in being anyone's sugar momma. 
    So now you have it my high standards now you tell me am I being unrealistic?
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 06, 2012 at 11:19 AM


    I have to agree a little with the standards that some set. Some women try and compare a man to his father and you can't do that. No one is perfect and you can never find a man like your father because that is your father not you man. Maybe some women just take the time out to get to know the person inside and out then maybe they would not be single.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 05, 2012 at 05:08 PM


    Easytolove.
    As a single AMERICAN woman, I find these two comments to be generalizations, and rather unfair to the majority of American women.  I know there are those kinds of selfish women out there who are extremely spoiled and full of themselves....but most women of any nationality are not like this. 
    I am sure that compared to other nationalites, what women in the US seem to look for is much different, but there are variety of reasons behind each women's decision in a mate/man.
    I am single because I have chosen to this point to be so, mainly because I have not found a man who treats me respectfully, someone that loves me as I love them, and doesn't expect me to be his everything, aka, his mother, laundress, cook, etc.. I don't want a man I can boss around and I am far from spoiled, I just don't want to settle for someone that I know isn't right for me.
  • View author's info Posted on May 24, 2012 at 10:37 AM


    I won't dare speak for most women, but I will say this: I am having a problem finding a decent, comfortable in his own skin guy. It is not that my expectations are too high, it is simply that I am mature enough to decide what is good/or not good enough for me. 
    You might ask what does "good enough" means to me, well, it actually is a mix of basic qualities in a man which have become rarer and more pecious then time itself :). Gentelness and strength, kindness, courage, vertical spine, wisdom, sense of humor, a deep seeded sense of fairness, light hearted yet a deep thinker, unafraid of age, definately not a "show off", treating people with dignity...
    Somehow it seems that the more attractive a woman is the more she attracts "show offs", men that confuse loving a woman with owning a woman.
  • View author's info Posted on May 12, 2012 at 07:28 AM


    I see beautiful women who are married, and others who are single. I see dysfunctional women (and men) who are married, and dysfunctional women who are single. Just because you are not married does not automatically mean that your expectations are too high.  The choice to get married is a serious one...and most people don't take it seriously enough.  We have to stop using marriage as a "barometer" for normalcy. Life and s*&t happens...and it is usually not about "deserve" and often has nothing to do with good or bad choices (I am not saying that there are no consequences to bad actions, but bad things happen to good people and vice versa). 
    I have good friends who are single men and women.  And in some cases they just have not met the right person. Once you get to your 30's and above, if your life is like mine, you go to work and do your routine...and truthfully virtually never meet eligible single people...it's difficult...which is why we are here to begin with.  And just because a woman is beautiful and single is no reason to avoid them...doesn't mean something is wrong with them.  If they have high expectations does that mean they are "too high"...or just that they are not willing to "settle".  How many miserable married people do you know? I know quite a few.  And I would rather remain single the rest of my life than settle.  The truth is that some people would rather be with somebody (almost anybody) than alone. But this is not me...and I suspect many people on this site would agree.
  • View author's info Posted on May 04, 2012 at 10:40 AM


    It may be your looking only within a specific range and for a specific type, hence the reason you keep running into the same 'type' of woman with these same type of expectations.  A 25 year old woman is quite different than a 45 year old woman...20 years of life experience...and 45 yrs very different than 55 yrs.  Bottom line we tend to attract what we ourselves are within, so if you are having 'difficulty' in what you are attracting or attracted to...looking inward will help. Relationships only reflect who we already are, nothing more/less.
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 24, 2012 at 05:06 PM


    OP, I fall smack dab in the middle of your description of the single woman. At 47, after a 25+ year marriage, I'm back in the dating world. I'm educated, intelligent, attractive, and (even my ex husband would agree) I am described by those who know me as generous, kind, and sweet. I have no interest in changing anyone other than myself -- and that's a lifelong personal growth journey. (I'm usually rather humble as well, but these posts require a higher level of directness to get a point across, regardless of how uncomfortable I feel giving the description.) I just joined this site to see if I can find a man who is charismatic, intelligent, and emotionally mature. Those 3 characteristics are tough to find, in my experience (which is thus far rather limited). I'm a traditionalist, a woman who believes in the masculinity of a man and thrives on it -- I'd never want to step on it! It goes quite nicely with the femininity of a woman who enjoys being a woman (as I do). So why am I still single? I just haven't met "the one" yet. I don't have a check list, nor do I worry much about appearance (his, I mean; chemistry comes in all shapes and sizes), but when I've gone on 2 or 3 dates with someone and there's no chemistry whatsoever, there's no reason to keep wasting the man's money on dinners and drinks. It's best to be honest and move on. If there's chemistry and compatibility, I'm ready to commit to seeing if one evening turns into a month then a year, and so on.
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 20, 2012 at 11:05 AM


    Similar question goes to man who attractive.
    I want to know why attractive man who knows how to take good care of themself are so picky even with the beautiful woman ? Why most of those man woman desire don't want commitment and marriage unless they face a day and realise that they are old and unattractive now and even with the money they can not buy what they want TO MAKE YOUNG BEAUTIFULL WOMAN TRULY LOVE HIM.
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