Why are beautiful woman still single? Message Board

  • View author's info posted on May 03, 2011 01:35


    Aurora

    I would be interested in what the last 3 guys in your life thought and whether they felt like a king while with you. If they did I hope they treated you as well if not better. My point is if you truly treated them like a king, why did you end it or why did they end it? I would love to feel valued or treated like a King. Because I know I will be doing much to counter that and more if I could. And if I were treated like a king or how I state in earlier posts here, I would fight to keep her.
  • View author's info posted on May 03, 2011 01:24


    I see this topic has stirred a lot of interest and views so I want add a couple of reasons why beautiful women are still single.

    Askmen has made some points I agree with about women.

    This was originality written about why women sleep around more today than they did 30 years ago. I would also add this may very well be a few reasons why they are still single. Especially beautiful women. Some points other than the most common one here and that is high expectations.

    1- No Time For A Relationship

    Anyone who's ever been in a long-term relationship knows that keeping it in working order often takes a high level of dedication and willingness on the part of both parties involved. Going out of your way to work through a difficult period in the relationship demands much more time and effort than just calling it quits.

    This kind of devotion doesn't seem to be something that your average Gen-X woman has the time or patience for. She's probably too busy trying to get her career in high-gear and spending time with her friends to dedicate too much time and energy to a boyfriend.

    For such women, the investment in time and sheer effort required for a serious relationship just isn't worth their while. They prefer keeping things casual and strictly for kicks, rather than having to deal with the potential inconvenience of a boyfriend.

    2- Fear Of Commitment

    They're scared of opening themselves up to a man, and making themselves vulnerable in the process. (sounds familiar with men)

    Maybe they've been hurt in the past and believe that keeping it casual is a good way to avoid developing any real feelings for another person, which would create the possibility of them getting hurt again.

    Aside from these I think most would agree here that the most common reason IS women's high expectations keep them single because they simply do not want to settle for anyone less.
  • View author's info posted on May 02, 2011 10:23


    unfortunately, I have been surrounded by a bunch of self centered, selfish men who think just for themselves or they become so complacent with the relationship that they are no longer conscientious about reciprocating.  However, I am very hopeful that ther are a lot of men who are not like that, and look forward to finding my prince.

     

    JK

  • View author's info posted on Apr 23, 2011 20:16


    Quoting Aurora222000:

    I have high expectations of myself, so I allow myself to have high expectations of other people. If the people don't match my criteria, there's no problem...I just don't feel swept of my feet, I'm not impressed, there's no magic and I definitely don't fall in love with them.

    I know many women who fall in love not with a guy, but with the possibility of being with someone. They create and invent their own magic. Now, I understand for you it's easier to be with a woman like that, you don't have to do anything, she does it for you: she idealizes you, she imagines you're her prince and she falls in love with a perfect guy from her imagination. But do you realize it's not you who she's in love with, it could be any guy?

    So, if I'm alone, it's not because of my look, it's because of me being honest to myself and to others. My point is: it's not about BEAUTIFUL women being alone and the UGLY ones being married. It's about HONEST women preferring to stay alone until they really find love and about INSECURE women being to afraid of staying alone: So they just accept any guy who who is willing to be with them and they never complain or except more of them out of fear he could go away. It's takes courage and guts to choose to stay alone and not to “settle”. And even though I'm lonely sometimes, even though I'm scared sometimes, I still prefer to stay single then to have just any guy sleeping next to me. But when I'm with someone he knows he's the best, because I picked him out of the thousands. This is what you get when you’re with demanding woman, you just know you're the king. Otherwise you just know she was lonely when you passed by.



    This Gal has hit the Nail on the Head.!!!!!!!!!! You can call me a Bitch, but I have High Standards for Myself....  Therefore I have High Standards for YOU !!!

      I was told once that someone wanted to go out with me, (but he was a Lush), and I said that I didn't do Drunks....  The guy asked me why that Man would have to change to go out with Me ??  I said he doesn't.......  And I Don't Have to Change to go out with Him. 

      Beauty is only skin deep.  If you are cold and hateful on the inside, that is what is going to radiate out.  A lot of guy's want Arm Candy, and that is Exactly what they get, something that Looks Good, but it ain't worth opening.....

     

    D.

  • View author's info posted on Apr 11, 2011 09:24


    Quoting Kevin6677:

    Too many of them are high maintenance and expect the man to worship them, They are takers not givers.



    very true
  • View author's info posted on Apr 09, 2011 17:16


    Probably because because beautiful people have more choices and so it takes more time to pick amongst them and settle on just one...if at all.

    Most people, not just attractive ones, want mates who are at least 40% better than themselves in a variety of ways.

    But I will say that in my personal experience, its not attractive people who are single except for the ones who think they are too good for everyone. In fact, from my observations a lot of attractive people seem to have no issues dating people who aren't as attractive as themselves. I think this is because these individuals don't really have anything to prove to the world, as they are already attractive. How many times have you seen an uber hot man/woman with an average mate and wonder what they saw in them?

    Meanwhile, its unattractive people looks or personality wise, who seem to have the most trouble finding mates because they overshoot what they can get in a mate or wish to "date above their means". These individuals are often quite shallow in their own right and need the best looking trophy mates possible to prove to the world that they can indeed snag a good looking person, or to make up for not being able to take the Homecoming King/Queen to the prom in high school. (eyeroll)

    Unfortunately, many of these types of people suffer from low self-esteem and thus always need to validate their worth through the looks of their partners. And when they can't find someone far above their level to put up with them, they turn bitter against everybody...thus making them even MORE unattractive. Vicious cycle, eh?
  • View author's info posted on Mar 22, 2011 06:40


    Beautiful women are more emotionally availiable women and therefore easier to break its a hard life but they always go for the idiots
  • View author's info posted on Feb 25, 2011 21:05


    Women who prefer to be in a long lasting relationship with a man should

    1 Find a man who brings out the best in you
    2 Find a man who values, appreciates, acknowledges,supports and affirms you often
    3 Find a man whom you do not desire to change or mold to your expectations but has his own way of meeting them.
    4 Find a man who can't wait to be involved with you and do the things you enjoy or need help with.
    5 Find a man who understands the power you hold for just being a woman in his presence.
    6 Find a man who will never raise his voice or lay a finger on you for any reason.
    7 Find a man who does not do vices...Or feels he has a private life you can not be a part of.
    8 Find a man who can cry in front of you and be able to handle his insecurities and vulnerabilities while keeping you in awe and on a pedistal to be cherished.

    Try talking to a man who has been in a longterm relationship or marraige and see if he falls under these areas. He most likely will.
  • View author's info posted on Feb 07, 2011 10:33


    As I have mentioned here before being beautiful is a matter of perspective. Both for how you see yourself and for how others see you. Being beautiful can be a physical trait but I was hoping any woman would respond regardless of how others see her or or how she may see herself. Now it would have really seemed strange to ask a question such as, Why are ugly women married? We all know ugly really is exclusive to appearance. But being beautiful isn't so much. I have dated women who were not so much attractive in appearance as they were beautiful on the inside.They had wonderful fun and mature personalities.

    I facilitate small groups of separated and divorced men and women and over the last 15 years I have found so much interesting conclusions on perspectives on dating and marriage I am now writing a book on it.

    Keep it mind your expectations for the right guy could be in line with the right guy's expectations of you. This could make the dynamic or chemistry of a possible relationship more challenging for both of you. Just because you found him and he meets your expectations doesn't mean he will feel the same about you.



    When I said I try to avoid beautiful women with high expectations once I notice them I meant it. But the women don't really need to be attractive in appearance at all. That's up to them to know about themselves. The point is having high expectations so exposed that a guy sees them clearly. If you want to carry a sign of what you want or expect so others can see, go right ahead. Have your expectations, tell the guy what they are or show him and see if that gets you the guy of your dreams. I would think not. And if a man finds out the relationship is all about you and what he can do for you and he sees that you know it, it will be all about tolerance and time for him.


    BTW I'm taken. Single not married yet. I think she is beautiful inside and out and she doesn't think it is all about her and her expectations. She doesn't show that she has them or that she is aware of how beautiful she is in appearance. I can't wait to serve her and she can't wait to serve me. A feeling of value on both sides. If I don't meet her expectations she can show me the door. But I know she is very happy. She shows it in the way she wants to serve me and the way she makes me feel valued while with her. So I want to serve her even MORE! Hence the MAGIC is there.

    I'm here to pick brains and gain better understanding and perspective, not to find a mate. I am required to have a profile to post here and may use it if I get dumped by her....lol
  • View author's info posted on Feb 05, 2011 14:26


    I guess there are many ways to describe people and their inner qualities. I would not use the term ugly to describe one's character or personality but I may describe someone as being beautiful whether it be inner or outer beauty.

    Any way I meant the term beautiful to be anyone with qualities worth pursuing for a longterm relationship not just a short affair.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 31, 2011 13:03


    I have high expectations of myself, so I allow myself to have high expectations of other people. If the people don't match my criteria, there's no problem...I just don't feel swept of my feet, I'm not impressed, there's no magic and I definitely don't fall in love with them.

    I know many women who fall in love not with a guy, but with the possibility of being with someone. They create and invent their own magic. Now, I understand for you it's easier to be with a woman like that, you don't have to do anything, she does it for you: she idealizes you, she imagines you're her prince and she falls in love with a perfect guy from her imagination. But do you realize it's not you who she's in love with, it could be any guy?

    So, if I'm alone, it's not because of my look, it's because of me being honest to myself and to others. My point is: it's not about BEAUTIFUL women being alone and the UGLY ones being married. It's about HONEST women preferring to stay alone until they really find love and about INSECURE women being to afraid of staying alone: So they just accept any guy who who is willing to be with them and they never complain or except more of them out of fear he could go away. It's takes courage and guts to choose to stay alone and not to “settle”. And even though I'm lonely sometimes, even though I'm scared sometimes, I still prefer to stay single then to have just any guy sleeping next to me. But when I'm with someone he knows he's the best, because I picked him out of the thousands. This is what you get when you’re with demanding woman, you just know you're the king. Otherwise you just know she was lonely when you passed by.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 31, 2011 08:23


    Quoting dannyspl:

    As I have mentioned here before being beautiful is a matter of perspective. Both for how you see yourself and for how others see you. Being beautiful can be a physical trait but I was hoping any woman would respond regardless of how others see her or or how she may see herself. Now it would have really seemed strange to ask a question such as, Why are ugly women married? We all know ugly really is exclusive to appearance. But being beautiful isn't so much. I have dated women who were not so much attractive in appearance as they were beautiful on the inside.They had wonderful fun and mature personalities.

    I facilitate small groups of separated and divorced men and women and over the last 15 years I have found so much interesting conclusions on perspectives on dating and marriage I am now writing a book on it.

    Keep it mind your expectations for the right guy could be in line with the right guy's expectations of you. This could make the dynamic or chemistry of a possible relationship more challenging for both of you. Just because you found him and he meets your expectations doesn't mean he will feel the same about you.



    When I said I try to avoid beautiful women with high expectations once I notice them I meant it. But the women don't really need to be attractive in appearance at all. That's up to them to know about themselves. The point is having high expectations so exposed that a guy sees them clearly. If you want to carry a sign of what you want or expect so others can see, go right ahead. Have your expectations, tell the guy what they are or show him and see if that gets you the guy of your dreams. I would think not. And if a man finds out the relationship is all about you and what he can do for you and he sees that you know it, it will be all about tolerance and time for him.


    BTW I'm taken. Single not married yet. I think she is beautiful inside and out and she doesn't think it is all about her and her expectations. She doesn't show that she has them or that she is aware of how beautiful she is in appearance. I can't wait to serve her and she can't wait to serve me. A feeling of value on both sides. If I don't meet her expectations she can show me the door. But I know she is very happy. She shows it in the way she wants to serve me and the way she makes me feel valued while with her. So I want to serve her even MORE! Hence the MAGIC is there.

    I'm here to pick brains and gain better understanding and perspective, not to find a mate. I have to have a profile to post here and may use it if I get dumped by her....lol



    Danny,
    For the most part I agree with you, however, I totally disagree with this sentence, " We all know ugly really is exclusive to appearance".

    I've met people, not just women, but men too, who are ugly from the inside. Which overrides any physical appearance, for me anyhow.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 26, 2011 11:57


    I am beautiful, still single? what is wrong with that?hahaaha..
  • View author's info posted on Jan 11, 2011 13:40


    I would have to say, sit on the fence.
    There don't seem to be any Alpha's left, even if there were, where are they? Do they meet the challenge??

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  • View author's info posted on Jan 07, 2011 17:17


    Yes, Yes, Yes!
  • View author's info posted on Jan 04, 2011 18:14


    I would have to agree with the woman who stated that she met a great man, but distance between them and her daughter still in need of a mother is creating an adverse situation for romance.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 03, 2011 08:51


    Perhaps this is too simple an answer ( and similar to why the bear went over the mountain ):

        Once we're there the grass looks greener on the other side.

  • View author's info posted on Dec 27, 2010 09:55


    Men...thank you for your posts. It's enlightening and refreshing to hear your point of view. It does help to hear what men want and need.
  • View author's info posted on Nov 21, 2010 15:44


    I think it holds true that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What one person thinks is beauty another person may find unattractive. I think its all personal opinion; and personality too. Someone could look like a greek goddess but have the personality of a rock lol So you never know :)
  • View author's info posted on Nov 18, 2010 04:03


    I wanna dinner and shoes...
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