I think I am with you Bonnie. I have been accused of being commitment phobic even after a relationship has lasted for 4+ years. I kind of have mixed feelings about the whole marriage extravaganza. I mean, are my feelings for someone really going to change once I walk down the aisle? I hope that we are already at the point where we are totally committed and we don't need a ceremony to convince us that it is going to last forever. I would express my love for my woman every day and I wouldn't need to throw a party for our closest friends to confirm that. Not totally against it but sometimes I wonder why we place so much emphasis on it and then 50% of them end up not lasting anyway.
I am the reverse..I live in fear of walking down the aisle in a prickly white gown, might just change my mind half way down and become a runaway bride..so after much convincing ..I could only be coaxed to take an hour off work, dashed to the Registry in a new peach-colored silk suit (my office gear being normally black) and sign the papers but forgot the wedding ring and never wore one in all my 20 -year marriage..our wedding party was a surprise party that night organised by the two offices...that is the only way I could do it..impromptu..otherwise I might have too many reasons to cancel ..the commitment phobic