marriage Long Term Relationship

  • View author's info Posted on Jun 02, 2005 at 08:56 PM



    champagnepowder write:

    Bonnie88 write:
    Tanamria...
    HOw did you land up dating all those spongers?
    I have never ever paid on any date..maybe you should seriously look at dating older men then who could take you out and give you a nice evening out ...



    Now Bonnie, is it all about who pays and who doesn't? I'd prefer a woman who isn't a sponge (yes, I know you aren't) and has her own ambition and success. That way we can SHARE life.
    I agree that if she paid all the time that is out of wack. I'm just saying that I like a relationship to be a two way street rather than a dead end ;-)


    Champ two way street is fine...and I often take my turn buying lunch/dinner, whatever. BUT on the first date...sorry, stereotyping or not, I don't think much of a man who makes me buy my own latte, lunch, or dinner. It says CHEAP to me in a major way!
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 02, 2005 at 07:54 PM



    Bonnie88 write:
    Tanamria...
    HOw did you land up dating all those spongers?
    I have never ever paid on any date..maybe you should seriously look at dating older men then who could take you out and give you a nice evening out ...



    Now Bonnie, is it all about who pays and who doesn't? I'd prefer a woman who isn't a sponge (yes, I know you aren't) and has her own ambition and success. That way we can SHARE life.
    I agree that if she paid all the time that is out of wack. I'm just saying that I like a relationship to be a two way street rather than a dead end ;-)
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 02, 2005 at 10:46 AM


    Tanamria...
    HOw did you land up dating all those spongers?
    I have never ever paid on any date..maybe you should seriously look at dating older men then who could take you out and give you a nice evening out ...
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 01, 2005 at 10:27 PM


    well, serious in vows would be a good start, but thats not what i meant. i meant a guy who accepts responsibility, and isnt so clingy with mommy. not to say being a momma's boy is bad, cuz its not. but a guy can only be so close with his mom without that interfering with his entire life. i also mean, a guy who has a job, and isnt a bum. im sick of paying for everything. i may have money, but it isnt to pay for every date. my money is for me and my son.
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 01, 2005 at 10:02 PM


    Welcome back CP!
    We miss your male view, serious and light, funny and ironic...
    I guess too many people take life and love too seriously and forget to enjoy life itself, whether with or without that someone special...
    Being happy in ourselves is the first step to sharing that happiness, at least you won't be burdening that person with your unhappiness or become dependent on that person for your happiness..
    Just visualise if u were trying to sell 'happiness ' and 'unhappiness' on the street for free, which do u think would go first?
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 01, 2005 at 05:40 PM


    Good point Bonnie. The whole phrase 'taking vows seriously' is kind of a joke in this day and age anyway. I know it may seem pessimistic to break marriage down to statistics but they do show that vows mean nothing and more of the 'serious' relationships end up in failure. I'd rather have someone who isn't so 'serious' about life, knows how to laugh at themselves and enjoy life. Commitment is great but a lifetime of commitment is not guaranteed by any vows.

    Tanamaria...I'd start with looking for someone who loves you for you and vice versa. Forget all the material stuff and look beneath the surface!
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 01, 2005 at 01:56 PM


    but you know what?,if a marriage ends,its for a good reason,it was never meant to be,my whole feeling towards this whole thing, that once you marry,you marry for life,you dont marry to divorce,and the sad thing is when there is children involved in the marriage,there the only ones that realy get hurt out of it...
  • View author's info Posted on Jun 01, 2005 at 12:21 AM


    Tanamaria,
    What is a 'serious man' in your view?

    someone who takes his marriage vow seriously?

    statistically only 1 in 3 Cinderellas could find that serious Prince Charming, so that is your chance of finding him in an age range that could be as wide as you dare. I suppose the 'seriousness' of his intentions will grow with age, so I think you could try the range from '50 to 99' and make sure he has you down as his beneficiary in his insurance policies, his will...
    oops..just doing some strategic planning for you...
    Cupid is getting very confused trying to aim her arrows on everyone with so much needs and agenda...Love is a hard target to aim at this day and age..not being cynical just realistic , Im afraid.
  • View author's info Posted on May 31, 2005 at 09:44 PM


    well, i was 19 when i had my son, so i had to grow up very fast. and im just sick of playing games, i want a serious man, no games.
  • View author's info Posted on May 31, 2005 at 05:14 AM


    marriage...I'll take that to go Please.With a Se*Xy Man..
  • View author's info Posted on May 31, 2005 at 03:41 AM



    tanamaria write:
    i guess im just bitter because of what all my ex's did. i was the one always getting cheated on. and im just fed up with it. im just out of a realationship, where he kept with holding sex from me. and im a very sensual person, thats just part of who i am. and i put up with it for 3 years. i found out he was cheating on me with some girl he knew when he was little. so, im done playing games, i dont want a guy who is going to play games. im ired of playing games, im a single mom, with a son to raise. i dont have time for games.



    ...well dear girl...if it can help u ...I was in that situation for 25 years...so finally u only lost 3...be happy and look forward u r very young and pretty....life is full of surprises ...and not all of them are bad!! cheen up...
    Just one question though...how did u menage to get a child so young!!!...
  • View author's info Posted on May 30, 2005 at 11:37 PM


    Tanamaria,
    I hear what you are saying..a single mum at such a young age and having to work and fend for both of you is tough..do u get help from your family?
    Do you get a chance to retrain or improve your skills and add to your own education in your job?
    Don't get disheartened..what you have to your advantage is your youth, your son as your best focus and make time to improve and educate yourself when you have a chance or make that chance happen for you .
    Looking for the right man is an unpredictable chance which you could only leave to Fate but educating yourself and giving yourself a stronger self-esteem and sense of achievement is all within your powers.
    Put your past down to youthful inexperience and don't be bitter.....you can still make your own dream come true without that man of your dreams..he may just be waiting for you there while you least expect him when you fulfil your own dreams..
  • View author's info Posted on May 29, 2005 at 11:57 PM


    i guess im just bitter because of what all my ex's did. i was the one always getting cheated on. and im just fed up with it. im just out of a realationship, where he kept with holding sex from me. and im a very sensual person, thats just part of who i am. and i put up with it for 3 years. i found out he was cheating on me with some girl he knew when he was little. so, im done playing games, i dont want a guy who is going to play games. im ired of playing games, im a single mom, with a son to raise. i dont have time for games.
  • View author's info Posted on May 29, 2005 at 04:52 PM


    Tanamaria...I think you need to have a closer look in the mirror! You are a natural beauty! Work on your self-esteem & confidence! Listen to NYC!
  • View author's info Posted on May 29, 2005 at 06:25 AM



    Bonnie88 write:

    tanamaria write:
    im not good looking enough to get a guy to do anything like that. lol. i guess ur a real pro huh?

    ________________________
    oh tana yes u are..and bonnie is right buy your own- however... say u are with a really dopey guy and he says look what i got u a lovely tennis bracelet- then u say " what who is this for? this is hello kitty jewelry . go get me a bigger one.. then he does, then say please get my name tattooed on ya arm- then he does- then say-- im sorry this isnt gonna work out ...ok
    yeah bonnies right love is important somewhere in this world.. love pets and children
  • View author's info Posted on May 29, 2005 at 02:26 AM



    tanamaria write:
    im not good looking enough to get a guy to do anything like that. lol. i guess ur a real pro huh?

    ________________________
    you are a pretty girl so don't understimate yourself.. having seen how some of my girlfriends operate, I use to think that the smart girl who marries for money also knows that she was chosen when he had choice..and when all goes awry, at least as a widow or divorcee you may be sad but rich (if you know how to play your cards right) rather than miserable and poor...lol
    the smart girl is the one who marries for money or like NYchick don't even marry and keep the rings or the real estate after the game is over but truth be known , there are'nt that many su*ckers in this world ..so love is the next soft option..and hopefully he has potentials to earn your keep..LOve indeed has a price..so know it before you buy it..

    but the best investment ladies is still to invest in your own potentials..buy your own diamonds and your own real estate..and when it all goes wrong , you have your own
    investment and ability to start all over again..and steer clear of golddiggers.. takes one to know one..(tongue in cheek) :)
  • View author's info Posted on May 28, 2005 at 11:10 PM


    im not good looking enough to get a guy to do anything like that. lol. i guess ur a real pro huh?
  • View author's info Posted on May 28, 2005 at 08:54 PM



    fun4two write:

    NYCHICK write:

    sorta like a serial killer i collect sparklie rings from men who propose



    Hey darlin' ... we need to talk! Jewelry? You collect rings?

    Now, here's a novel idea ... Real Estate ... At least it appreciates ... ask for engagement real estate!!
    If you're not into real estate ... ask for antique cars, or antique furniture! (at least you'll get some use from those)

    Girlfriend ... who needs a jewelry box full of rings ... what are you going to do with them? If they're like mine ... they just sit in the box and shine!

    LOL

    good god mine are made into necklaces earrings and yes i got real estate gifts

    why are men so willing to give these gifts?/when if fact i am not all that nice to them?? sue the debate come on lets get it rolling

  • View author's info Posted on May 28, 2005 at 08:37 PM



    Bonnie88 write:
    BUt NYchick why do u want a ring if u don't care for marriage..what does that ring signify? payment in kind or promise of non -commitment?

    sorta like a serial killer i collect sparklie rings from men who propose
  • View author's info Posted on May 28, 2005 at 02:39 PM


    BUt NYchick why do u want a ring if u don't care for marriage..what does that ring signify? payment in kind or promise of non -commitment?
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