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  • View author's info Posted on Feb 27, 2005 at 02:47 AM

    Actually, I did have spankings as a child, that is how I can now say it is abuse.

    Steel, you are absolutely right - he is a dirty old man!
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 24, 2005 at 01:36 PM

    The fact remains, regardless of the argument:

    spanking/smacking/hitting = abuse
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 20, 2005 at 11:23 AM

    Ok Spoils, the Bible may have one stand on this topic, and that's what you stand by fine.

    However like I said, here, the government and the law look at it from the purely physiological and physical view. It is AGAINST THE LAW to spank/hit a child. Period!
    So no matter what the Bible says, you can not spank a child here!

    Therefore, it's not going to happen, and there will be less angry young men in society causing trouble when they are older because they were punished in such a cruel and inhuman way.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 20, 2005 at 04:03 AM

    There are many pathways to spirituality.

    There are many, many beautiful religions on this earth at this time, all of them with their own points of view and opinions, not all of them following the bible per se. I have met many beautiful Jewish people, many beautiful Buddhists, Hindus, Pagans and Mormons. I don't necessarily agree with all that they believe, but they are entitled to follow any path that they desire.

    They all go to the same heavenly realm upon passing to spirit. They all go to be with Father God.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 18, 2005 at 05:29 AM

    Spoils, me move to a forum I know something about?
    Hmmmm? Well I'm a mom of 2 older one married working with 2 kids of his own, doing well, and one in high school. Besides the usual teenage angst, no problems here. So how does that not make me qualified to speak on spanking?

    Our provincial government passed with law a few years ago, and actually jailed parents from a strict religious commune and took their kids until they promised to lay off using the strap and other means of corporal punishment on children. They are still checked up on by children's services. They weren't going to return their children if they kept following the old testament, word for word!
    I think both sides were a little extreme on this issue but those are the facts.
    So as a mother, who did try spanking and time outs, like petite1 I found denying things works alot better than spanking/hitting, showing them who's the boss!
    It also didn't help when I gave them a spank I cried more than they did!
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 17, 2005 at 05:34 AM

    Spoil, I'm not only an emotional mom, I'm also an emotional human being. I don't find it hard to show my emotions, especially when it comes to my love for my daughter. I'm her only parent and doing it alone. It's not very easy, and doing it alone wasn't my choice. Her father made that decision to remove himself from her life.

    If I weren't an emotional mom, I wouldn't be able to give her enough love to compensate for 2 parents instead of 1. If I weren't an emotional mom, my heart wouldn't be big enough to love her, even when she's misbehaving.

    For her, time out works much better than spanking. It hurts her feelings more and is embarrassing to her. Spanking her makes her become more aggressive. That may not be true for another child, but it is true in her case.

    But I understand your concerns when it comes to kids and how they become our future. We parents do the best we know how, and love them all we can. You can never go wrong if you give them all your love and give them your time. What they do once they're grown is up to them. We hope for the best, just like all the parents from generations past did.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 15, 2005 at 07:19 AM

    (the ending of my post was cut off, so here's the ending)

    Spoils, if you weren't being aggressive in a violent way, I'd just throw you and your clothes out the door and change the locks! LOL. What woman could live under the same roof with you? (Don't get all bent out of shape. Learn to laugh a little and don't take all of this so seriously)
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 14, 2005 at 04:05 PM

    In my clinic I deal with the aftermath of children being abused (spanked) by their Father's. A child should not be punished in this way, it is outright abuse of the rights of a human being.

    What are you going to do next, Spoil, stone a woman because the bible says you can if she disagrees with you! Yeah sure.

    I have never heard such nonsense from a supposed grown man of your advanced years.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 14, 2005 at 11:21 AM

    The great debate; to spank or not to spank. Every child is different. What works for one, doesn't always work for another one. Some children are more difficult than others to keep in line and deal with. I can see that Spoils was probably one of those children. I was raised the old way that spanking was the only discipline method there was. It's passed down from generation to generation. We live what we're taught. So when I first heard about 'no spanking' and that spanking was abuse, I laughed. But you know what? When it comes to my daughter, the thing that really upsets her the most is when I put her in time out. Spanking doesn't do a thing, except make her become aggressive(worse tantrum, kicking, etc.) Time out turns her back into the sweet little girl I know and love. After time out, she comes and hugs me and tells me, "I love you mama."

    Sometimes you have to consider WHY children act out in the first place, other than the obvious fact that they're kids. Kids act out for a lot of reasons. Sometimes kids are ignored at home, so they act out to get attention. Sometimes the parents have a crappy marriage, and the child sees and hears fighting in the household, and kids have a way of acting out because of their frustration and insecurities from the parents problems.
    Sometimes, just changing the atmosphere at home can make a difference in a child's behavior. Spanking won't fix it. Sitting them down and communicating with them about what is bothering them, is a sure remedy.

    Spoil, I wonder what would ever make a woman want to hit you in the first place?(I just can't imagine lol) In my book, it would have to be over something pretty serious. Say for instance, you believe in spanking kids and even hitting women. It's obvious from your posts that you have an aggressive nature, especially that mouth of yours. It won't stop. (just a scenerio) If it were me, I'd hit you if I were defending myself against you. But if you weren't being violently aggressi...
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 14, 2005 at 05:47 AM

    Spanking and hitting are both forms of physical force. One may be softer than the other but they both tech violence.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 14, 2005 at 05:45 AM

    We teach children what we want them to learn by our own actions. Do we want to teach kids to grow up to hit, spank, and be violent? Our society is already filled with so much violence it is sad. I have three children. Although it may have been tempting to spank them when "I" lost my temper, I never spanked them. A baby starts hitting when he/she doesn't get their way. It is a natural reaction to want to do so. I have been teaching for 16 years. The inner city children I teach get spankings way too much. Consequently, when another kid bothers them, they smack them without even thinking. It is a vicious circle. If one knows how to handle children based on psychology or common sense, spanking does not need to occur.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 14, 2005 at 05:30 AM

    Spoil - you are SOOOOOOO good looking yourself that you put a picture on your ad!!!

    What a loser. Go find yourself a life
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 14, 2005 at 05:29 AM

    Spoil - either you stop your abuse or you will be removed from MM altogether.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 10, 2005 at 01:50 PM

    Children should not be spanked in any way, no matter whether you want to call it abuse or not.

    Particularly an adult male smacking a child, anywhere on the body, is abuse, whatever piece of the bible you wish to quote to salve your conscience in having done it.

    Congratulations on abusing your children, I hope you are proud of yourself.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 10, 2005 at 07:26 AM

    A man who hits kids will hit women too.

    People who hit people smaller than they are belong in jail ... not therapy.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 10, 2005 at 12:38 AM

    So Spoil, you are either divorced or a hypocrite, both by the sounds of it. Considering your posts on this forum I think you need psychiatric treatment since you obviously cannot separate fantasy from reality, which is a recognised psychosis.
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