women want money... men want beauty... its a trade... thoughts? Romance

  • View author's info posted on Mar 14, 2005 19:01

    i think that i dont know what im doing in here but here goes i dont know if im surpose to reply or just write something im looking around
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  • View author's info posted on Mar 12, 2005 02:57

    At the risk of seeming a ?slut,? I can't imagine anyone being repulsed by sex. Being repulsed by someone who WANTS sex with YOU is possible, but sex is just bliss in an A-bomb!
    Even a toothless old beer-guzzler with a comb-over starting from his shoulder blades, man-boobs & a gut that could test the limits of Spandex can be the implementor of great sex; if you glue your eyes shut, stuff wax in your ears & hold your breath for an hour. If you can suspend the horror of reality & use your imagination, a climax can be reached regardless of beauty, or the lack of it.

    BFD said women want money to make them feel safe. Well, that's probably true at times, but I don't feel safe just because I have cash. I definitely feel HAPPY when I do, so money DOES buy ME happiness! But safety, for me requires more.

    A man I met online, lives on the coast, and said he wanted me, that he longed for the touch of my skin, the scent of my hair, the feel of my lips, the weight of my body on his; all that stuff you know is being said so you'll sleep with him. God, bless him! But, this was all online for a few months. I didn't know how he really felt or how I would feel in return until we met. I told him I was looking for a man who could hold me & make me feel safe, who would pull me to his chest & nothing could hurt me. I guess the safety I craved wasn't so much a wish for protection from physical harm, or bankruptcy as a desire to know, with no doubt, that he cared about me & would always be there for me.

    When we met, it was instant lust at first sight, for both. It was everything I ever wanted. Then he confessed ... he was married.

    I didn't freak out. I figured SOMETHING must have been up; everything was too perfect.
    He said he wasn't unhappily married. He said he would never leave his wife & children. He said he never thought it would be a problem to ?hook up? with me & then just go back home. But it was. I didn't judge right away, mostly because I ...
  • View author's info posted on Mar 11, 2005 10:47

    I heard that a lot from my male friends, BFD, what you said about "women beginning to actually BE uninterested to mildly interested in sex or to dislike or even repulse at the idea of acting provocative". It's like once they know they've got their man hooked, they don't make the effort anymore or in fact, they revert to their REAL personality. That is beyond me. I think it boils down to COMPATIBILITY... wanting the same things... and being HONEST... if you don't like to be provocative or sexy for your man or boost his ego, etc., and that's how he likes it, well don't be with the guy! You're bound to end up unhappy anyways so why waste anybody's time! I know that I sure want my man to be sexy and provocative with me... and that's how I am with him also.
    You know how people come into your life either for a brief moment, for a month, or a season or a lifetime? These people will always bring you something that you can learn from, you just need to be observant. Well this man came into my life only for the duration on ONE email... on a dating site (he was too far away)... he wrote to me: "Anything worthwhile in your life requires constant care and attention. If you bought a 200 000$ race horse, would you give it 24-hour care? It's the same with a relationship." What he said just stick to me like glue. If you're in a relationship, you have to work at it, be creative, find new ways of making it interesting... BUT it has to be a two-way street... it has to come from both partners, and that starts at the very beginning of the relationship with honesty.
    As for money, marrying for money is a temporary materialistic band-aid... it lasts so long, and then inevitably the want for something deeper and true kicks in, and THAT's a sure thing... nobody can escape that! I never married for money, never will... Compatibility AND chemistry... nothing else.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 06, 2005 07:42

    Ok, I'd have to agree with the last comment. When you're almost 80 and crawling up under your 600 thread count sheets beside the man who you've spent your entier life loving (as he sets his teeth out on to the nightstand next to you) you won't care about what car's in the drive way, or what size the house is, you'll look at him with no teeth and think how you are the luckiest women in the world because you've spent the best years of your life with someone who has made you laugh and giggle and touch your heart in ways no one else could. Besides money makes the world go round but its all the things money can't buy that make life worth the ride! The warm touch of a good man or soft kiss of his lips, can't buy that. Besides you could lose every penny tomorrow and then what will you be left with?
  • View author's info posted on Jan 06, 2005 05:59

    Seems like everywhere I went there was BFDeal and his lengthy tomes.I decided to see for myself what exactly he was about and prepared to dislike him.I was wrong.Once I got past the way he presents his opinion I had to confess that,bottom line,he was right about alot of things.We women can turn our noses up at money,say we don't need it etc.I say if thats true then why are we all on THIS site rather than Poor Nice Guys.com?Deal is right.whether or not we care to admitt it we women,deep down,do want things like security and safety.Financial,emotional and physical.Let's face it money can provide at least two of those.Of course we all know a rich jerk who would't make us feel secure emotionally.We should take responsibility for that anyway.I have 47 yrs.behind me so don't need BFDeal to tell me men lust.Men are obsessed with sex,so what.Yes it takes physical attraction to produce lust but,BFDeal thank goodness for different tastes.What may turn you on may not be what turns on another.I don't always care for the way you say it but it doesn't make many of your points less valid.Then again some of your points are not fact,just your opinion and you should have a bit more patience with anothers point of viewI pre judged you to be a jerk.You aren't and there is an extraordinary mind in there.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 05, 2005 08:24

    New here....my 2 cents..
    I'm a woman....beautifful inside..and outside (I've been told)....and Yes...I want a man with money...but also a man who's honest and caring.
    I know I'm worth it!
  • View author's info posted on Jan 04, 2005 14:29

    I believe both sexes place too much value on both looks and money....although from a woman's perspective, having financial security means saying goodbye to some very major life stressors and allows her to concentrate more fully on her partner and also enables her to keep herself beautiful for her partner. And feeling beautiful and knowing her partner thinks she is beautiful adds to a woman's inner beauty by building self confidence. It would be nice to say that this could be (and sometimes is) accomplished without available finances, but often is not. It's just a reality of life. And men are very visual beings. They want buns, and beauty, and glamour (which most of us start out with but tends to fade with age) but fail to understand that what they "see" isn't necessarily what their true heart desires. Men are afraid to admit they "need" a good-hearted woman, and so often opt for looks instead of inner beauty. Neither beauty nor money can bring lasting happiness if that is the only motive for love. If a man can say he would truly still love his woman if she were disfigured or scarred, and a woman can say she would truly still love her man if he were broke and living on the street, that's real love from the heart. Really, when it comes down to it, what else is there to live for ? It's certainly not money or beauty.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 02, 2005 21:54

    I agree, and to expand on that: Sex for Safety.

    Woman want to feel safe. Money is one way. Feeling good about themselves is another way to feel safe because it reenforces the reason why her man, who is her safety, is sticking around. She knows why he is there and hence can feel safe as long as that reason is there.

    Men want sex appeal in general. It's not the only quality they want, just the the most effective.

    One way to give men what they want is to keep them stimlated visually. That is not always practical.

    Another way is by keeping thier ego inflated.

    Causing mind-blowing orgasms to occur on a frequent basis is yet another way to maintain sex appeal.

    Culture and tradition has use however observing a protocol of deceipt called courting or romancing and for the women, acting like a lady.

    She's does not lust.
    He's a gentleman and desires her for her mind.

    The public facade.

    Personally, I'm frustrated by t the number of people that forget it's just a facade, not what we are really like.

    They begin to actually BE uninterested to mildly interested in sex or to dislike or even repulse at the idea of acting provacative (slutty or like a whore).

    Thanks for Ringing the TRUTH bell. DING DING.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 02, 2005 17:41

    does anyone on this site cares about good heart and sould or just to find sugar daddy or mommy?....I believe, every single person has something good inside, don't be afraid to show your good side and you'll get a great feedback. So hard to find your true love and soulmate but possible...
  • View author's info posted on Jan 02, 2005 13:52

    I agree with this statement to a point... Only if both parties involved are completely aware of the roles. I have been in relationships for love and for money and neither perfect. I would love it if I could find both qualities in one man.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 02, 2005 13:51

    I agree with this statement to a point... Only if both parties involved are completely aware of the roles. I have been in relationships for love and for money and neither perfect. I would love it if I could find both qualities in one man.
  • View author's info posted on Jan 02, 2005 07:02

    Money can never buy you love or happyness only 4 a mean. while then it fades and u still be trying to find love and hard to know if a woman or a man is going to love you for you and not your money.... A beauty is somthing your eyes catches at the monent but once you get to know the person with in its a different story thats why look at beauty andf love with in not out and your find happyness
  • View author's info posted on Dec 22, 2004 16:37

    Actually I agree with BFDeal,somewhat.Women have been taught and socialized to repress their sexuality.Not all of us but many.Beautiful?Eye of the beholder.Money can buy stuff and some people.BFDeal,I'd like to talk to you.
  • View author's info posted on Dec 22, 2004 13:39

    i think that if we put money and beauty in a balace they will heit the same...almost nothingh in comparison with the most imoportant thinghs in life : Love and Friendship.
  • View author's info posted on Dec 22, 2004 10:28

    May be true, but I don't like the way certain guys on ehre assume that the women here are all gold diggers. I have my own money, I don't want someone else's. I jsut want a guy to have his own money so he doesn't spend mine!
  • View author's info posted on Dec 22, 2004 02:05

    I personally think that money is something that BOTH partners contribute into the relationship to make it worthwhile.

    Chemistry is a MUST and communication & trust HAVE to be there first.

    I know personally I'm on here to find a mate with the same goals as far as being a professional and a hard worker that has achieved the lifestyle they choose to live... just as I have and on the same level.

    I truly believe we all in relationships should be evenly yoked in order to feel you're not pulling ALL the weight in the relationship as far as paying bills and material possessions.

    It takes more than "stuff and things" as I call it to make someone happy long term...

    Money doesn't MAKE the man or woman.... It's what's in your head and heart and how you treat others ;-)

    Just my humble opinion...
  • View author's info posted on Dec 19, 2004 06:12

    Tom, I sent you a message regarding your post . I wish you the best of luck in finding a woman who'll love you for you and not money, but I think you pose a very valid question and it seems to be a real truth! Happy Holidays.
  • View author's info posted on Dec 18, 2004 04:30

    men like $$ too... & women no matter how old still luv hard beauty.....seems like a fair trade...lets swap :)
  • View author's info posted on Dec 17, 2004 11:28

    This just my opinion but if you look at the huge picture.. Having money isn't all that great, Having beauty isn't ethier. But to truly find you complete soulmate without ethier is hard to do. Money, Looks and all that can fade away in time but to honestly find someone that loves you for you is very hard to do.. for as a true love can never fade away or be bought.. and I think alot of people should step back and look at the whole picture!
  • View author's info posted on Dec 17, 2004 07:43

    I think if thats what both parties want, are interested in, and are happy with...who can say it's wrong? I mean if thats what it takes to make someone happy...then BE HAPPY!
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