When rape is actually rape can be a trickier question than just saying, "It's when someone says no."
If you think of all the different situations when people have sex, it raises an interesting question. Say one person usually likes forcible sex, but one particular time, her statement of no actually means it, yet the man thinks she's just going through her normal routine. Is it rape or a misunderstanding? What if a guy says he's do something for a girl if she sleeps with him. Is that a form of rape because she agreed? What if fear is involved in the equation? What if the girl is afraid of a particular consequence unless she sleeps with a guy? There would never be the word no actually come from her mouth. But she's sleeping with him for some other reason than she actually wants to. What if alcohol and drugs are involved and the person doesn't really know what they're doing? What if someone takes advantage of someone that isn't psychologically capable of making the sound decision of yes.
I don't think when it comes to the subject of rape people, both male and female can be careful enough. People will say that girls should be allowed to dress any way they want without worrying about getting raped because of it, and although it sounds great in theory, that's just not how it is. People make impressions based on appearances all the time. Girls need to be more careful to protect themselves and not make themselves vulnerable. Guys need to protect themselves and not assume anything. It's not as romantic to talk about sex prior to having it, but it's better than being slapped with a law suit the next day. People need to take precaution measures rather than trying to fix something after the fact.
I'm not saying that's the end all for the subject. People rape for multitudes of different reasons. There is not a mold to fit all cases. That's what makes it so hard to define, so hard to charge, so hard to prove, and so hard to treat.
No means no, but being silent or agreeing due to underlying circumstances doesn't always mean yes either.
Who ever thinks rape is just bad timing doesn't get it..
When it happens to them wonder what they would say. Guess what happened to me?? I doubt it..
How do you console someone who has been beaten and raped, when they feel their world has ended from all the trauma, they have been plunged into a world of darkness or the parents who daughter committed suicide because the rape was so demeaning,the trauma was more than they could handle..Or the rapist got carried away and killed them so they could not testify against them.
How about a rape of a child?.. did they ask for it? did they know what it meant? They don't understand why someone hurt them badly when they were trusting them...How do you help them understand what has happened to them or do you tell them that it was just nothing..
No means No,, and a child pleading NO should mean more..
And those who cry rape just because they can shame on them. It hurts the rest that has lived through it.