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Posted on Wed, Apr 12, 2006 09:15

katiegrl write:
robtest write:
whisperinocean write:
Angyson write:
What does all this stuff about orgasms have to do with the topic at hand? Move on ladies.

Are we feeling a bit uncomfortable? :)
That's the turn your topic took. Would you rather we discuss the male orgasm?



Actually Angy made a simple statement, so the topic was fairly open to wander. Perhaps the female orgasm is a contributing factor to why we "men" have been burned??? Can't you guys speed it up? I mean it only takes us guys 3 minutes. Must men spend their whole life waiting on women to get ready??? ROFL... :o)


I know you're joking Rob, but if you weren't, I'd have to say..... what part of "romance" are you guys not getting?????"

We've already established, on this Forum, that men need sex and women need romance. Men are dominated by their member and often, women are influenced by their favourite romance novels and chick flicks. lol

That's not to say we don't also enjoy each other's needs, but isn't it a no-brainer? If men want sex from us, they have to be romantic!! If they are romantic, then we find them sexy, then we give the sex! What's so difficult about that??? Birds and animals understand it! Are men not as intelligent as a ruffed grouse? lol

When men take us out for dinner, or buy us flowers or hold our hand or just start nibbling on our necks with their arms around our waists... it's all romantic foreplay to us! We find that extremely sexy! It turns us on! Foreplay is NOT twiddling this, flicking that and swirling all over the other thing! It's being romantic while making love to us! Don't you get that???

And what's with the lecture on frigidity and self-exploration? We aren't a bunch of 40 year old practically-virgins who don't know how to feel pleasure and need men to tell us to get our mojos working so we're good to go for them!!! How condescending and irresponsible is that?

If women are faking it, don't be naive! It's because you suck in bed (at the moment) and we're afraid to hurt your feelings! Or we pity you for the twenty minutes you've dedicated to poking and probing us until we're physically irritated so we mercifully call an end to the torture by performing the Meg Ryan orgasm howl. That's not a bad thing! That's women cutting men some slack! That's not frigidity, that's us just not being into your "technique" tonight!

It's because some men's interpretation of foreplay is squeezing a boob or smacking a rump. That's NOT romantic! lol

Women don't need a freaking toy to feel pleasure! Most women knew from age four how to make themselves feel good! But while men think it's funny being referred to as a penis with a man attached .... women are NOT just body parts with the girl stuck on! We aren't a bunch of warm, moist orrifices! We are human beings who want to know we are loved and appreciated totally, not just vaginally.

If men can't understand that by now, after all these excellent forum debates, well ...... there's always room-temperature watermelons and warm apple pies. lol



Yes Katie, it was a joke! BTW, has the warm apple pie been burnt??? :o)



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Posted on Tue, Apr 11, 2006 23:57

Angyson write:
If you ladies wonder why we are reluctant to meet you, we don't really know what we want. We do know however what we do not want--our ex-wives,other bad relationships,other men's children.
So we are here to see what is available,cautiously.


Angy ... just because we have children doesn't mean we want YOU to be their father. Many women find a babysitter for their bairns (that's "babies" in Gaelic) so they can pursue a relationship, and don't present the children unless they are certain they can trust you won't molest them or sell them to an adoption agency when their back is turned.

You disrespect MANY women by citing "children" as an undesirable trait to have.



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Posted on Tue, Apr 11, 2006 23:51

robtest write:
whisperinocean write:
Angyson write:
What does all this stuff about orgasms have to do with the topic at hand? Move on ladies.

Are we feeling a bit uncomfortable? :)
That's the turn your topic took. Would you rather we discuss the male orgasm?



Actually Angy made a simple statement, so the topic was fairly open to wander. Perhaps the female orgasm is a contributing factor to why we "men" have been burned??? Can't you guys speed it up? I mean it only takes us guys 3 minutes. Must men spend their whole life waiting on women to get ready??? ROFL... :o)


I know you're joking Rob, but if you weren't, I'd have to say..... what part of "romance" are you guys not getting?????"

We've already established, on this Forum, that men need sex and women need romance. Men are dominated by their member and often, women are influenced by their favourite romance novels and chick flicks. lol

That's not to say we don't also enjoy each other's needs, but isn't it a no-brainer? If men want sex from us, they have to be romantic!! If they are romantic, then we find them sexy, then we give the sex! What's so difficult about that??? Birds and animals understand it! Are men not as intelligent as a ruffed grouse? lol

When men take us out for dinner, or buy us flowers or hold our hand or just start nibbling on our necks with their arms around our waists... it's all romantic foreplay to us! We find that extremely sexy! It turns us on! Foreplay is NOT twiddling this, flicking that and swirling all over the other thing! It's being romantic while making love to us! Don't you get that???

And what's with the lecture on frigidity and self-exploration? We aren't a bunch of 40 year old practically-virgins who don't know how to feel pleasure and need men to tell us to get our mojos working so we're good to go for them!!! How condescending and irresponsible is that?

If women are faking it, don't be naive! It's because you suck in bed (at the moment) and we're afraid to hurt your feelings! Or we pity you for the twenty minutes you've dedicated to poking and probing us until we're physically irritated so we mercifully call an end to the torture by performing the Meg Ryan orgasm howl. That's not a bad thing! That's women cutting men some slack! That's not frigidity, that's us just not being into your "technique" tonight!

It's because some men's interpretation of foreplay is squeezing a boob or smacking a rump. That's NOT romantic! lol

Women don't need a freaking toy to feel pleasure! Most women knew from age four how to make themselves feel good! But while men think it's funny being referred to as a penis with a man attached .... women are NOT just body parts with the girl stuck on! We aren't a bunch of warm, moist orrifices! We are human beings who want to know we are loved and appreciated totally, not just vaginally.

If men can't understand that by now, after all these excellent forum debates, well ...... there's always room-temperature watermelons and warm apple pies. lol

  


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Posted on Tue, Apr 11, 2006 17:04

robtest write:

whisperinocean write:
Angyson write:
What does all this stuff about orgasms have to do with the topic at hand? Move on ladies.

Are we feeling a bit uncomfortable? :)
That's the turn your topic took. Would you rather we discuss the male orgasm?




Actually Angy made a simple statement, so the topic was fairly open to wander. Perhaps the female orgasm is a contributing factor to why we "men" have been burned??? Can't you guys speed it up? I mean it only takes us guys 3 minutes. Must men spend their whole life waiting on women to get ready??? ROFL... :o)

Ben started it!!! hehe.



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Posted on Tue, Apr 11, 2006 15:29

Benefactor123 write:
whisperinocean write:
GrapesOfGoodHope write:
Whisper, Benefactor and Rob!




Well said about the woman not being in touch with herself.



Amen.


Sometimes it takes a good friend or two who will openly talk, to help another woman learn about herself, and having an orgasm. Taking her to a store to buy her first toy. It's not the easiest thing in the World to do, when one has never entertained the thought before, and probably never been in a shop that sells such toys.



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Posted on Tue, Apr 11, 2006 08:38

whisperinocean write:
Angyson write:
What does all this stuff about orgasms have to do with the topic at hand? Move on ladies.

Are we feeling a bit uncomfortable? :)
That's the turn your topic took. Would you rather we discuss the male orgasm?



Actually Angy made a simple statement, so the topic was fairly open to wander. Perhaps the female orgasm is a contributing factor to why we "men" have been burned??? Can't you guys speed it up? I mean it only takes us guys 3 minutes. Must men spend their whole life waiting on women to get ready??? ROFL... :o)



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Posted on Mon, Apr 10, 2006 23:10

Angyson write:
If you ladies wonder why we are reluctant to meet you, we don't really know what we want. We do know however what we do not want--our ex-wives,other bad relationships,other men's children.
So we are here to see what is available,cautiously.


Angy - when my husband left us, I was a basketcase. I remember a guy accusing me, shortly after, of being a man-hater. I said, "I don't hate all men! I love men. I just hate HIM."

None of us want to ever be hurt that badly again. But if we're on an online dating site, we must be at a point in our lives where we're ready to take the risk, to try again.

Many people learn from their negative experiences and form a list of circumstances they know they do not want to run across again in a new relationship. But if we're ever going to find a new love (or lover) we also have to take a bit of responsibility and cooperate in making a relationship work, not just waste the rest of our lives searching for the perfect person who has the qualities we want and lacks the flaws we don't want.

We have to be willing to love and please the other person as well as expect love and pleasure in return. You can't offer love and the promise of pleasure if you're coming from a bitter place where you're expecting another betrayal and insisting the other person be who you want them to be, never hurt you and always compromise. The trick is to get over the bitterness first, become at peace with the past, develop hope for the future, and impliment a plan of attracting a new love.

If your personal tragedy is more than 2 years old ......... let it go. It's time. Move on to better things. I promise you, if you get rid of your caustic mood and take the risk again, there's someone out there who very much wants to love you. Open up and see with new eyes.

Luv,

Katie



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Posted on Mon, Apr 10, 2006 09:07

DenaliDad write:
"...a good girl keeps her legs together..." How quaint.


Not my opinion, but still standard for a lot of people. (Men or women)



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Posted on Sun, Apr 09, 2006 21:21

I think that men who have been burnt suddenly get very defensive and hide in their caves as a result they decide to give penalty points to all women regardless the situation.
What they need is luv, but with that distance they will never score 1/2 a point with any lady.
About other men's children it must be exhausting for some to open up with the fruits that were not harvest by that specific individual, knowing that they were conceived in moments of passion and true love.(for some is intimidation and for others is pressure)I don't blame I understand. Men are all different,(some from Mars-Angyboy) and nobody wants a bad relationship-duh that includes us women-even women with children/ grannies etc..
Cheers and peace in the Middle East

  
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Posted on Sun, Apr 09, 2006 20:07

whisperinocean write:
GrapesOfGoodHope write:
Whisper, Benefactor and Rob!




Well said about the woman not being in touch with herself.
Sometimes it just has to be pure animal lust between you and your partner which makes things interesting. No love and gentleness.


Amen.



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Posted on Sun, Apr 09, 2006 14:48

Benefactor123 write:
SweetAimee write:
(<--)

I think all women are able to come in a short period of time,(or able to learn) but it takes a woman who is willing to give herself completely, who feels good about herself and emotionally connected and safe in the arms of the guy shes with.

Aimee.


I actually believe that to be true, theoretically. In practice, many, many women will never get to that point and to a large extent it is their own fault.

You've got to take out the old vibrating friend every once in a while and get to know your body. Train your body to experience higher and higher heights of pleasure. Can't just wait for that perfect guy to come along who will both love you till the end of time, be devoted to you, emotionally available, communicative and oh, yes,the most incredible lover who will know exactly how your body works.

How many men like that exist?

In my view, women have to "take" their orgasms rather than wait to "receive" them. BTW, I do not believe the same to be the case for men, but men are so much simpler anyway.

You know what ladies? I agree totally with Ben, if a woman does not know how to get her own orgasm...it is not the fault of the man. Alot of women dont know how to acheive sexual pleasure, and depend on the man to figure it out. The poor guys get a bad rap. Many women that I know, have never been able to figure out their own needs and therefor think that its the mans fault. I feel that if you know what it is that will take you to that point, then you should steer the man where he needs to be. Not all women are the same, they dont all need the same thing and some women simply are not that interested in sex. They may say they are and they may go through the motions and rather enjoy it, but do not have the desire to feel complete satisfaction, or maybe they believe that they have and dont realize that there is much more to it. I suppose some women would like to feel that they are sexually aware of their innate needs to reach an orgasm, but alas, pure and simple its just not that important or they would have reached their goal. They dont realize that reaching orgasm is a state of mind, not physical stroking, not feeling the movements of sex, but realizing your ultimate desire and allowing your senses to heighten and be freed and to allow yourself that out of body sensation. How do you think the guy feels when hes doing all his greatest efforts that have been tried and true, only to find that he is with a woman that is not capable of reaching the level that he is at. I for one, feel incredibly lucky that I am aware of the many other senses. I think that being able to orgasm from my own desire to do so, long before actual penetration, makes me a very lucky woman. So cheers to all of you guys, im sure you are all wonderful and just need the pleasure of finding a nymphomaniac at some point in your life. Hell I think just typing this, did it for me. LOL



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Posted on Sun, Apr 09, 2006 01:30

Come on SpiritedHellion, that was a very cautious wink, don't be abusive now!



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Posted on Sat, Apr 08, 2006 16:27

Angyson write:
If you ladies wonder why we are reluctant to meet you, we don't really know what we want. We do know however what we do not want--our ex-wives,other bad relationships,other men's children.
So we are here to see what is available,cautiously.


And yet, you "wink" about wanting contact with a woman who has "other men's" children. Talk about hypocritical.



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Posted on Sat, Apr 08, 2006 15:11

other mens children is bit of topic in itself no one wants a "new daddy"that shouldnt even come into it.Most women on here are self sufficent anyway so another mans child means????and if you like a woman that much,and want to meet here what do you think i cant because she has child/children????Am sure alot of women on here will agree with what i have said but personally a man like that isnt worth the hassle anyway....

  


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Posted on Sat, Apr 08, 2006 01:44

Angyson write:
I was trying to explain why men are reluctant to meet you and all I get is abuse.


Awww how rude of me!

  


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Posted on Sat, Apr 08, 2006 01:38

Benefactor123 write:
You've got to take out the old vibrating friend every once in a while and get to know your body. Train your body to experience higher and higher heights of pleasure. Can't just wait for that perfect guy to come along who will both love you till the end of time, be devoted to you, emotionally available, communicative and oh, yes,the most incredible lover who will know exactly how your body works.

How many men like that exist?

In my view, women have to "take" their orgasms rather than wait to "receive" them. BTW, I do not believe the same to be the case for men, but men are so much simpler anyway.


I agree with you there.
I think the fact that a lot of women don't really know how to be pleased is because they're not trying to find out for themselves what's pleasing to them.
Or when they did have the courage to try out a vibrating novelty they're disappointed that a guy isnt as magically fast with whatever bodypart.
I think the reason why a lot of women are sexually unaware comes from the taboo on sex for women.
Women with a vivid sexdrive, who are upfront about their wants and desires often come across as slutty and easy.
A good girl keeps her legs together.
Men learn at an early age about sex, from eachother, from porn, from whatever they can get their hands on and while doing that are still considered cool. A woman is still taught to wait and only 'give her flower' to the special man she's going to marry.

And I think that a lot of men are intimidated by a sexually demanding woman, suddenly the guy finds out that the thing he was doing with all the ladies before is considered crappy sex.
Ask a guy whether all the girls in his past have reached orgasm and most likely the answer will be 'YEAH!- of course!'
Chances of that to be true are slim to none I think.
Not the guys fault, women should not fake it. But I think they are faking it because the will to please the man in question is greater than the will to find out what she likes sexually. (Which comes from the strange double standard on sex for men and sex for women.)

  


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Posted on Fri, Apr 07, 2006 15:37

Benefactor123 write:
Easily orgasmic women and women who need an hour to climax or who never have, might as well be from different planets.

To say that it is only about what a man does or that it is the lack of emotional connection etc. is a cop out and simply untrue.

The simple fact is that a woman who can climax in 5 minutes or less with one man will be able to do so with another man and a woman who needs an hour to climax with one man will not climax in 5 minutes or less with anybody.

No, I dont agree with you there Benefactor.
I think Robtest was completely right about the mental and emotional aspects.
I think it comes down to sexual maturity and the way a woman feels about herself and the partner she s in bed with.
When a guy is having a good time in the bedroom, the mind of the girl might go: doesnt my tummy look too big when I lay like this.., will he still love me tomorrow.., I wish I had done some more crunches this morning.., is he coming?..., oh- hes touching my legs- lets flex my muscles.., sound- must make some sighs.. OH YES?, is my mascara running.., hope hes coming soon cuz this is getting uncomfortable..., I love him!..., oh yes hes going to come- come on baby!...
A woman has to feel good about herself naked, good about the man shes with and she must have the nerve to show or point out what she really likes. (And for the latter? she must know what it is that she really likes!) (-->)



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Posted on Fri, Apr 07, 2006 15:26

SweetAimee write:
(<--)

I think all women are able to come in a short period of time,(or able to learn) but it takes a woman who is willing to give herself completely, who feels good about herself and emotionally connected and safe in the arms of the guy shes with.

Aimee.


I actually believe that to be true, theoretically. In practice, many, many women will never get to that point and to a large extent it is their own fault.

You've got to take out the old vibrating friend every once in a while and get to know your body. Train your body to experience higher and higher heights of pleasure. Can't just wait for that perfect guy to come along who will both love you till the end of time, be devoted to you, emotionally available, communicative and oh, yes,the most incredible lover who will know exactly how your body works.

How many men like that exist?

In my view, women have to "take" their orgasms rather than wait to "receive" them. BTW, I do not believe the same to be the case for men, but men are so much simpler anyway.



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Posted on Fri, Apr 07, 2006 14:58

(<--)
Fact is that there are a lot of guys who are just not very interested in figuring out what it is the lady wants. When a girl hasnt had (m)any good sexual experiences, her expectations for her intimate time with you (for example) won't be very high.
And since she doesnt know how great it can be, she wont come very fast, or maybe she wont come at all.
I think all women are able to come in a short period of time,(or able to learn) but it takes a woman who is willing to give herself completely, who feels good about herself and emotionally connected and safe in the arms of the guy shes with.

Angyson?
I wasnt wondering at all why you were reluctant to meet me, but fortunately now I know that in case I might ever wonder, I already know the answer ;-)
Stay cautious,

Aimee.



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Posted on Fri, Apr 07, 2006 06:40

Benefactor123 write:
blondeindian write:

Angyson write:
If you ladies wonder why we are reluctant to meet you, we don't really know what we want. We do know however what we do not want--our ex-wives,other bad relationships,other men's children.
So we are here to see what is available,cautiously.

at our age, almost everyone has been burnt,you move on babe, and don't blame new love on past mistakes...


Yeah, right, he who does not learn from past mistakes is both dumb and asking for it to happen again.

Nobody is blaming anyone new for what somebody in the past has done, all we are saying is that our sensitivity to signs of potential trouble is higher.

So if we sense you are potentially ultra-high maintenance, or frigid (oh, I forgot, all women on this site are a riot in bed), or you tend towards drama (over pets, over divorce, over kids, over forum discussions on MM) we may suddenly or not so suddenly disappear.

what????are you testy again dear????? What I meant, which you seemed to over look with that comment, is, that we have to move on and treat each new person as a fresh start, and try to forget and learn from what has happened in our past relationships. I have not been in one for a while, by choice, only because I am very picky and don't throw my love around so easily...It is hard to get burnt, either male or female, it hurts, plain and simple...I meant that a fresh start is not to blame for past regrets and a fresh start can lead to a happy situation, lighten up happy pants,lol....kiss



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