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Does everything have to be complicated!
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Posted on Wed, Feb 15, 2006 14:51

Just take it that "there was no chemistry" and move on... Probably not you!

I tend to find that meeting people falls into 3 catagories:

a.) 5% An odd internet dating warstory
b.) 90% Just a meeting with another person, okay, might make good friend or might never need repeating
c.) 5% A great first meeting, seemed to have much chemistry and potential !!!


If at first you don't succeed, try try again!



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Posted on Thu, Feb 16, 2006 19:02

It sometimes seems like a job interview or something. Not quite sure why. Some do, some don't. But for the most part, I feel a bit nervous/anxious at the start.

And those first few minutes, sometimes you get those little 5-8 seconds of silence that seem to linger for years, while your mind desperately searches for something to blurt out to end it!

Normally, if I can get through that, I am good to go... Not sure if levels of chemistry are a good thing or a bad thing at contributing to the nervousness.

After a bit though, you should get used to each other a little, so normally a gauge of how comfortable you feel with the person tends to be one of my contributing factors in seeing them again...

I once went out with a woman and over the course of the next several hours, I was contradicted and told I was wrong more times than I think I had been in my previous 43 years of existance! Not quite sure what all that was about, but she seemed angry at the world in general, so I tried to take it all with a grain of salt.

Come to think of it that grain of salt did kinda take the bitter taste out of my mouth! ROFLMAO... Is it specifically internet dating that is so odd, or just dating at this age of life, or maybe even the culture/time we live in??? Not quite sure, but it does have it's moments...

Now don't get me wrong, LOL, but I have had many good experiences too.



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Posted on Thu, Feb 16, 2006 02:31

whisperinocean write:
Why have things become so complicated?

Last night I met someone for coffee and it ended up in quite an intense discussion. As if my work doesn't already add that dimension to my life.

Everything came under a magnifying glass and had to be analysed.

Where are the men with whom you can go out, discuss topics from lighthearted to deep without it beind dissected and without feeling like you're some hungry lion's meal.

Once in a while it is good just to relax and enjoy the moment.

Is it just me?

I think there's a couple things going on: 1) Most people still get anxious about a first date/meeting,especially an internet date/meeting and that makes it difficult, especially the first 20 mins.
2) I think there are many people are not very adept at the art of conversation, so it can feel more like an inquisition than a conversation. Take the reigns! You have the ability to turn the inquisition toward something more lighthearted or fun and it can help the other relax a bit as well.....which will make it a better date/meeting for both, regardless of what kind of relationship it turns out to be..



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Posted on Wed, Feb 15, 2006 19:12

GlennaB write:

And Robert here is a seasoned on-line dater. He has been right, more then not.


But wrong just enough that he is back trying it one more time !!!! ROFLMAO...

That top 5% might be smaller than I think. :o)



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