Women in the U.S. vs. elsewhere......... Romance Forward to friends

  • View author's info Author Posted on Dec 30, 2004 at 02:35 PM

    Are there any women left in the world that truly understand what it means for a man to be a "true romantic?"

    I am 32 years old, well travelled and educated and a complete sweet-heart as well as a true gentleman......

    Handsome, extraordinarily loyal, funny, driven and an exceptional lover........Most of all, I say all of this with confidence, not arrogance and/or ego.

    So the question is; "Are there seriously no women (20-35 y/o) that view these attributes as those of a solid man, or are "all" women of my generation so clueless that they perceive them as weakness or insecurity?

    Not only are women in Alaska unbarrible (generally speaking), but I'm beginning to include American women (my age) in this generalization as well.......

    Quite frankly, I'm quite a catch; I find that in foreign cultures women chase me, but here in the U.S. women my age simply do not understand me.......

    Are there any other males in the U.S. that would agree with me? Are women in the U.S. simply going sour on us and/or becoming too good for thier own britches?

    I'm an extraordinarily kind man that would truly find privelage in finding a beautiful, down-to-earth American women (roughly my age or younger) that would allow me to treat her like the princess of my dreams.......But honestly, I don't think that American women have it in them.....Prove me wrong?

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  • View author's info Posted on Feb 03, 2005 at 11:58 PM


    Go to a bar in a major city in Italy, and you will see the men far outnumber the available women. Men in Italy HAVE to try harder to get women, because there is so much competition. This means, more often than not, they have to resort to BS and play the seduction game. Of course the women there will naturally have their ways of weeding the unsuitable men out, and probably get fed up with the meat market mentality sooner or later and start playing some games themselves. Let's not forget all of the familial and religious pressures placed on the female, by the very same men. These women know that they are just the flavour of the day, or that as soon as they are married and barefoot and pregnant, their man will be out initiating his next conquest.

    So, of course, it is easier for these men to come to a place like America and sit back and let the women hit on them. Must be somewhat of a novelty.

    My opinion? Laziness. Take it or leave it. My suggestion? Work on yourself, become the best man you can be, and you will soar above the competition.
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 31, 2005 at 12:34 AM

    Correct me if I am wrong - isn't this post supposed to be a discussion about the fascinating differences between US women and women from 'everywhere else" (what an interesting choice of words - seems I heard that on CNN the other day...hhhmm....never did understand the Us vs. Everyone Else mentality).

    Alberto - you are very clear in your posts that you are against rude comments, insults, and judgmental posts. However, in your attempt to stick up for American women, you are bashing Euro women, which has made you become the very thing you profess to be against.

    People are people, no matter which country they are from. Our differences are what makes life interesting...why be so defensive?

    Sharp1- I have noticed that men from Calgary tend to be more on the chivalrous side. It is nice...and good for you for raising such a considerate son!
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 24, 2005 at 09:50 AM

    Eurocharm I'm not agreeing or disagreeing with your comments about chilvary & men holding doors open for women, etc. I'm dating myself here...lol...but possibly things are changing with the generations? Everyone I know (platonic male acquaintances I've known for years or men I've dated) that are around my age or older display chilvary and hold open the doors, stand up to greet with a hug, pull out the chair, help clear the table...And by the way, I live in Calgary.
    It's something we teach our kids growing up. Maybe these men were not taught. I watch my 17 yr old son open the car door for his girlfriend all the time...just like his father did for me. It's ettiquette, which is learned. Thoughts anyone?
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 17, 2005 at 08:13 PM

    micoma...........couldn't have said it better myself
    High 5...........:)
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 17, 2005 at 06:33 PM

    Babeat46, I can appreciate that not all women in N. America are cold, it is just that I have heard that as a common complaint in my recent travels to the US (particularly, NYC). In fact, one real estate broker I was introduced to was so happy that I would let him take me out to dinner and hold the door open for me, as that is almost frowned upon nowadays in NYC. He told me he only dates Europeans now because he wants to feel like a man and be with someone feminine.

    Having said that, I realize not all American women can be categorized the same way, but that is the common complaint I hear from the men. Mind you, this is coming from NY and not the southern states.

    In the same vein, not all Europeans can be categorized as chivalrous and romantic either (as demonstrated by the differing posts regarding Brits). There is a tendency toward chauvinism as well as chivalry.

    Here in Vancouver, it is very rare to have a man hold open a door unless he is from somewhere else (Europe, Eastern or Southern States).

    No one region can have its people categorized so completely, but I can tell you that there are some definite trends in dating with people from certain places.

    And of course, we take the good with the bad.
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 17, 2005 at 06:26 PM

    Micoma, you got it. Don't give more than you get, save it for those that deserve it and have earned it. BFDEAL didn't say don't be nice, he said stop being extraordinarily nice to attract them. And if being extra special does work, you may have a woman that only wants you for how special you can treat her. Your heart will still feel the hunger for that special one.

    MEN: Stop listing all that you have to offer a woman and asking for ANY ANY ANY ANY ANY. What kind of man needs to be that way to get a woman. Think about what YOU want, because that ANY isn't going to give a flying F*** about you down the road.

    I like a man who thinks well enough about himself that he cares about what someone else has to offer. A man who knows what he wants. When men try to impress me by being overly gentleman, I know their game and it turns me off.

    On the actors, what does whether or not we remember their movies have to do with which actors we find hot? I don't think BFDEAL thought those actors were all that but he sure knows that most women do.

    Men need to start taking back their manliness. Or get walked on.
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 16, 2005 at 06:41 AM

    Well said micoma
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 15, 2005 at 08:02 PM

    You're not a wuss for making the woman you like feel special. You're a wuss if she turns out to be manipulating, selfish, just in it for all she can get without giving in return and you can't let go.
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 15, 2005 at 06:03 AM

    Eurocharm , I hate to have to shatter your illusions but British men in particular are absolutely no different to your men in the States!! In fact, English women will tell you how suave, polite and attentive American men are!!
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 14, 2005 at 09:18 PM

    I totally agree with EuroCharm. If I am going on a date, I fully expect to be have my doors opened, helped with my coat, chair pulled out, in a nutshell, romanced......woooed, so to speak....if the chemistry is there. I am All-American, so am not forward in the least. If I am asked out to dinner, the date had better not ask me to pay half, or I will quietly rise and leave the restaurant. Not all American women are emancipated. We like the romance just as much as European women.....if not MORE!!!
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 14, 2005 at 09:25 AM

    EuroCharm..No hate mail darlin..but"typically cold N.American woman"?How many cold N.American women have you dated?I think you need a bit of correct information.Cold?LOL...my men would get a chuckle from that so I don't need to go there.We know what our temperture is.I can't speak for all of us...but personally and especially as a southern woman I,and the American women I know are seriously feminine.I just like a man to be a man.The word gentleman,includes the word man,it includes romance and chivalry without being wussy about it.I won't comment on European men because I'm not one{good policy..hint}
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 14, 2005 at 02:16 AM

    Interesting opinions. Where else can you go to get honest, from-the -heart ideas from people as far away as Italy, Alaska, Canada and Switzerland? I'm an independent entrepreneur who can take care of herself, but I get weak in the knees when a man is a gentleman to me. Some men in Canada often balk at doing dreamy things for women by repeating the conviction, ad nauseum that, "Hey ... you girls wanted equality ,,, so you open the door for ME!"
    That's such a lame excuse for just plain laziness and lack of imagination. And what's so bad about being sweet and charming and seducing a woman? Are European men raised to feel like real men when they behave like that but Western guys are made to feel castrated? What nonsense! I met an English gentleman the other day who was joking around with me and I offered him my hand. He took it and planted the most delicate, soft but sexy kiss on it I've ever felt. I said, "My God, that was like being touched by feathers!" He replied, "Of course! My father taught me to kiss a woman's hand so lightly that she would not feel compelled to wipe it off afterwards!"
    Siiiiiggggghhhhh! How romantic. The stuff erotic dreams are made of. Thank God it isn't dead.
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 13, 2005 at 10:27 AM

    I may get hate mail for this - but men who prefer the overbearing, hold-open-her-own-door, typically cold N. American women over the more traditional feminine types are, in a nutshell- LAZY. That means they don't have to make any special effort to impress the woman or seduce her if the woman is the one making all the moves, paying half the dinner bill, and doesn't appreciate basic chivalry. What a shame! Where is the romance in that? I won't even consider a second date with someone who doesn't have the courtesy to at least TRY to seduce me.

    I have spoken to several men about this, so I know it is a common issue in N. America today....
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 12, 2005 at 04:44 PM

    HA ha ha...to what Alberto said..........
    I'm an American woman.....a North American woman even....just not from the US or Canada....
    Also...half Colombian...and let me tell you Alberto...I'm as open minded, independed and emacipated as can be...
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 11, 2005 at 11:35 PM

    PFDeal.... nice... Having fun reciting DYD material? David DeAngelo would like his royalty check, dude. ;)

    -- David
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 11, 2005 at 09:52 AM

    Lord D, that is exactly why I go for European men.

    North Americans are so confused about the interplay between men and women that it has become a showdown of superiorty more than anything else- where is the romance for God's sake?

    With a European, I know I will be treated properly and that he will be chivalrous and make me feel desired. This is not something 'wussy' or superficial, but rather his form of appreciation that is inherent in his genes. With a North American, I know that once he has me, I won't have have a lot of the more traditional pressures put on me....so I guess the best thing for all of us is to blend different ways of being into a package that fits....hhmmmm....a Westernized European, perhaps????

    As for BFDeal - I sense that your posts are intentionally abrasive in order to shake things up - this can be a good thing though as it gets people thinking.
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 07, 2005 at 09:46 PM

    I want cocky, make me laugh till I cry, but I also want a perfect gentleman. The one thing that turns me off, regardless of how "great a catch" he may think he is...is whining, and whiners get sand kicked in their faces and bullied. It's just human nature.

    On another note, I think Alaska is a bad place to meet a woman too...don't they fly some in on occasion for your pleasure ;) Perhaps a long distance love affair might be in order?
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 06, 2005 at 06:51 PM

    I'm sorry, but I'm not pecking at anyone. I read every single word BFD wrote, and I disagree with him....totally. Just because a guy is nice, doesn't mean he's a wuss. It just means he's nice. Also, I am one who treats people the way I want to be treated....therefore, I have never, and WILL never pick one someone who I think is weak. I have worked with the Developmentally Disabled for many years and have weak people work for me. When push comes to shove, those people will be stronger when the job is done!!
  • View author's info Posted on Jan 06, 2005 at 02:07 PM

    interesting remarks....

    so...let's go for european men......smile.....
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