I think that it depends. The majority of my friends are male. It's a personal preference of mine though. I live in Small Town USA where everybody knows everybody's business. In other words - lots of gossip. I'm not one to engage in "He said/She said". Out here, most of the women that I've come into contact with do nothing but gossip. I'm not stereotyping and saying all women are like this - just most out here in the boonies. Guys are, for the most part, laid back and drama-free. They are so much easier to talk to and hang out with.
I will tell you that it depends on the people involved. I think that it is possible to have male friends that do not want to sleep with a woman. My best friend is a guy, he's totally straight at least that's what all of his women say. Yes he can be a total man whore, but he will never sleep with me. We actually had this conversation a long time ago that he said he would never sleep with me not because I wasn't attractive, but because I was his best friend.
It obviously will be contingent on how attracted the man is to the woman as to how he will respond to her.. PERIOD...
I would say it safe to deduce.. the more attractive the woman, the more difficulty she may have in finding true men friends.. as men tend to "try" and be a woman's friend they are smitten with... BUT RARELY HAVE I SEEN THIS WORK! He eventually becomes resentful and jealous when he can't "charm" her into having chemistry with him. And God help her if she starts to like one of his friends!! I've witnessed grown men with friendships of 30+ years turn on one another over....... a woman they both liked..
I do feel it is important to establish friendships of the opposite sex, but... I also am a realist. If a woman has many male friends, she may wish to ask herself one of two questions...
Is this guy only befriending me because he is in hopes eventually he will get to sleep with me? Or.. Is he truly sincere?
My best friend is a male. He knows more about me than my family. He lived with me for 30 days, I couldn't take anymore after that, so he had to go. But I am sure that he doesn't want a relationship with me nor I with him. I am 99% sure he is straght. Men and women can be best friends with no romantic interest.
See, I just can't agree with the OP's statement at all.
First, he's asking the women not the men. The women have their egos on the line and are going to say yes. I bet if you asked, 1/2 or more of my female friends would say yes but regardless of what they say, it's never gonna happen!
I think in order for the OPs polling to be accurate he'd have to ask those male friends if A) his female friend thought he would sleep with her given the chance and; B) if given the chance would he actually sleep with this female friend.
As the info stands, all the women are saying is they believe their friendship with their male friends is based on more than friendship.
I will undoubtedly step in all kinds of piles of stinky stuff here... so...
I have plenty of female friends that I would never consider sleeping with but not because of some altruistic belief in friendship. In several instances, I am simply not attracted to them. Several more are really kind hearted but complete ding-dongs. Two are psycho but entertaining to be around. One is the sweetest woman I've ever met and she's really cute and is one of my best friends but she believes her entire purpose for being is to find a man who can keep her in Victoria's Secret so I recognize her values are waaaaayyyyy different than mine and, in a relationship she would make me crazy!
Now, there are other categories of female friends that I would not sleep with... coworker, friends wife, friends wives sister etc. but only a dumbass would go there anyway.
So the next question is would I be friends with someone I was attracted to and thought I could have a relationship with? That answer is pretty simple and straight: No!
If I know enough about her to know I'd like to date her then I've already asked her out and if she's not interested in dating me then I move on. There are tons of single women out there and I'm not gonna build some fantasy fixation up in my mind and spend my days pining over someone I can't have. What a pathetic thing to do and any man who does, deserves what he gets!
So, this leaves the 3rd potential group of female friends... the ex. Depending on how we parted on how I view her. If it was a respectful parting with no animosity then I will remember her fondly and wish her a happy birthday on Facebook. If the parting was not respectful then I don't ever want anything to do with her (and there are 3 of those). In the end, I believe my past should be behind me so that I have room for my future.
In my earlier years I've had a couple of male friends that I was interested in. When enticed, yes, there was potential for being sexual. Boyfriend? Not. So are you saying that because you were intimate that they are considered boyfriend/girlfriend? A lot of men will be intimate, but as far as accepting you for a girlfriend, in their eyes, you are the best thing going until someone else comes along. I know a lot of men that are sexual with women, the women thinks she is his girlfriend because of sex. But the man has a different view of the relationship. He hides, avoids, is not seen out, nor helps out in any way. He only there for one reason. Anybody feel me?
Yes, male friends really do exist. How do I know? I have them. And yes, I do know how men think. They confide in me. Some men do have girls as friends, and they are more like brother and sister. The man will defend , help, advise, and yes, be a friend. If a man is not interested in you as a girlfriend,(or sexually), he will be a friend. If the girl intices the man, or forces herself on him(initiating contact) yes he will go for it, (sometimes). Is it his nature? But I have and have had male friends. If they have any other intention, they have never let me know this. But others who say they are or just want to be friends, have shown me otherwise.
DDK56, ask them to sleep with you. Tell them you have always found them attractive and have a strong sexual desire for them. If they want to sleep with you or are tempted to sleep with you then they are not your friend. They are a boyfriend in waiting.
OK Orlando, you are spot on, there is not much to contest you on there.
I prefer male friends over women and always have plus I have spent my life in a male dominated sport career so surrounded mainly by men and have always thought of myself as one of the boys..... but ooooh the problems. Your'e right