Why don't financialy secure white/other men want black women? Interracial Relationship Forward to friends

  • View author's info Author Posted on Feb 15, 2006 at 12:54 PM

    I am a very attractive goal oriented Black woman from Chicago and I am having a very hard time meeting a man on this site and many others that would be with a black woman and I really don't understand why. I have viewed many profiles and not a single one of them have black as one of their selections where you can choose the ethnicity of the person you may be interested in meeting. I really would like to know why and where I can meet a successful man that wants to be with me

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  • View author's info Posted on Nov 25, 2009 at 04:38 PM

    You can't really expect this website to be the answer to all the racial/ethical dating problems in the world do you?

    It's not a golddigger issue, because women and men marry for money. I've got a regular cash flow and I don't want t date a black man. we need to stop pulling the race card when it's unwarranted!

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  • View author's info Posted on Nov 21, 2009 at 08:50 PM

    Just an observation, your question specifically states "...financialy secure white/other men..." Could it be that you are coming across as though it is all about that one word "financially?" Could you be unintentionally giving off the message that it is all about your fianancial gains? Just asking the question. I realize this is a millionaire dating site but all men like to think it is a little bit about him even if he knows it is about $$ signs.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 21, 2009 at 08:33 PM

    Quoting GoudeGirl2000:

    EXCELLENT Question....I see them stare, wave a little.......and then, when one has the guts to approach...I'm insulted to hear street venacular directed at me, I guess, in an attempt to be 'cool'? Primarily, I never see white males with mixed race females that resemble myself (Don't count Halle Berry, she finally got desparate enough to make her own reality, since she coudn't find it). I attended Regis University (Private Jesuit college), all of my sib attended private colleges, we're all extrememly articulate (No one can tell what race we are over the phone), skiing, Tennis, Travel, Continuing ed, Land and homeowners, no kids out of wedlock, Church of Christ members, conservative in dress and thought, family oriented (Parents and Grandparents were collectively cared for at home, until they passed) Avid readers, gardeners, animal lovers, and, oddly, quite often referred to by people of color as 'Acting, in two instances 'looking' & living like white people". Admittedly, one sibling, a Harvard lawyer, has been married to a white guy for about 20 years..YES: She was Double major graduate before they married...and, to this day, I think the only reason they married, is because he later admitted..he had no idea my sister was mixed race, or else...so, this all makes me wonder..is it racism? Because, a number of white men apparently had ALOT of sex with some women of AFRICAN descent, on the slave ships, and for hundreds of years thereafter...which explains the plethora of shades, over 100 hundred, among people with some African descent..so..then..maybe it's fear that they won't be accepted into social circles..THEIR forgetting that by having a child with a woman of color, they will actually have a GREAT chance at having a child in the NBA, NFL, PGA, etc...My blond beard/mustache, Green/blue eyed brother says, 'They don't wanna walk in w/ a 'dark-skin Shiqueeta', around their billionaire buddies and they don't think their friends will intrust them with millions if thy do so...afraid to invite 'Shiqueeta's fam members, because there are so many gorgeous (Fake) blonds who can help him further his career, and that "SHIQUITTA" probably only with him, so that he can help her support her 4 bebe's kids by 4 different men...sad.....4 females that my college educated Mom raised....and we've NEVER sought out a male, BLACK or WHITE, to support us! Nor have we been on welfare...I think white men harbor alot more fears, unlike a black man who will walk in to a upscale event, with a white woman that looks like a cross between Phyllis Diller/Carol Channing (Oh...wait...she recently admitted her father was black, but nort 'Real black"...what the helll does that mean?! and DARE anybody to look at him or his ugly woman sideways...get a back-bone, and women of color will come after you. Money and family crest doesn't come close to making a man..I read somewhere on this site, where a white male wrote, that he wouldn't date women of color, because he doean't wanna be used....I don't see the few women of color that are married to white men, raking them over the coals in divorce court...we have to much pride..we don't even try and do that to black..we're talk fom day one carry our own, stash money away in case you need to make a rune, be educated and if you can't do that, you be as strong as a man..as you can see, men walk off? A woman of black descent keeps that house ROLLIN' regardless..we do NOT need a male, to validate us..we don't crumble under pressure..we LIVE under it EVERYDAY!

    Why do you sound so bitter? Interracial dating is by choice. No one forces it upon you. We as women, Black, White, Red, Yellow, no matter what colour, must learn to love ourselves #1 before we can expect any man, no matter his colour, to love us. I am a strong woman who has tremendous love for herself and I date interracially by choice, and have dated only White men for nearly 30 years. But I was also married to 2 gorgeous Black men before (an African American and a West African) and dated White, Latino, German, Jewish, Polish, etc., between the 2 marriages.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 17, 2009 at 05:44 AM

    I agree with what previous women have said. If you give off a vibe/internalize the idea that your race is an obstacle..then it undoubtedly will be. I have dated well-educated, successful,white and asian men exclusively for several years now. If you carry yourself with grace and elegance, you'd be surprised how attractive you become. It also depends on the social circles you surround yourself with. Yes there are some racists..but for every racist there is someone who voted for Mr. Obama,and who thinks Michelle is just smashing :)

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  • View author's info Posted on Oct 23, 2009 at 07:15 AM

    You are so¿right.¿ You have to love yourself first before you can love anyone else.¿

  • View author's info Posted on Oct 07, 2009 at 05:55 PM

    I have had no problems meeting and dating men of another race.. I dont know what it is but I date more white men than black... I once thought there was something wrong with me because black men NEVER asked me out... I have taken the path placed in front of me... I have dated professional men from MDs to lawyers... No problem... I love being me... With all my flaws and all... I dont nor do I ever intend to be anyone other than who I am... That comes across... Just be you...

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  • View author's info Posted on Sep 26, 2009 at 12:58 PM

    I cannot give you a definitive answer to this, however I have experienced similar feelings in viewing womens profiles. I am not able to comment on this site as I have only recently joined, but I have noticed on other sites many women select that they are searching for a white male. I live in a predominantly caucasian part of the country, though I am not sure if that is the reason for womens selection one way or the other. I can say that I have also seen plenty of women who list that they only date black men as well. In public I do not see much prejudice , except in the rural areas, in the city not so much. Maybe people see this as a private area and their true feelings on race come out. Either way try not to let it get to you, every minority experiences it. Stay positive and you will find someone.
  • View author's info Posted on Sep 16, 2009 at 10:44 PM

    This comment is directed to goude200, to me you sound really bitter and you kinda talk too much.There is somebody for everybody and what 1 man don
    t like some else will love.There maybe a white man out there for you but you seem so agressive and it seems like you have to throw out your credentials and achievements to show that you are worthy.But you dont.There are white men out there who have money and dont care what people say or think ,including their family.You havent come across the right one.By the way Wolfgang puck,George Lucas(there are more} have dark skinned sistahs.
  • View author's info Posted on Sep 16, 2009 at 09:37 AM

    what's a "TT"? lol
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 31, 2009 at 12:04 PM

    I hear women make comments like this on a regular basis. Well here is the solution for anyone that feels the same way as the author; the first place to look for the right man for yourself is within yourself. And this begins with self love. Until you develop a self love so powerful that you don't NEED a man you will always feel like a victim; once you start loving yourself you will start attracting men from all over the place. Learn to love yourself first before you seek the love of someone else is step one of Seven. Some people pay $200.00 an hour to learn this, you got it for free.
  • View author's info Posted on May 29, 2009 at 12:55 AM

    Perhaps a combination of not wanting to be used, coupled with daily familiarity is the reason. Most of you have fascinating qualities that any man would cherish. So, break the ice more often to find the warm heart waiting for you.
  • View author's info Posted on Apr 24, 2009 at 04:51 PM

    I tend to disagree..I think if you are sexy and confident and can carry yourself in a way that exudes that.. ANY man will want you. It tends to be the opposite for me. Very successful white men are the majority when it comes to approaching me and recognizing a spark in me. black men on the other hand,from my experience tend to want a more financially unstable whirlwind booty call and as sexy as I seem all A girl really wants to know is if the looks go will they.
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 27, 2009 at 11:35 PM

    I think you should try blacksingle.com. You will find a lot of successful black men who are looking for women of color. Good men who know what they want and are not afraid to show both their strong and sensitive sides. And most of them are very good looking. They would appreciate a woman of color. try it.
  • View author's info Posted on Mar 14, 2009 at 08:53 AM

    Hi dallas 90210
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 10, 2009 at 06:22 PM

    I dont think that is the case on this site men know what they want and they want a certain woman. I do believe that certain races are looked at a certain way because of how they carry themselves especially women and you do as a individual have to be careful not to be put in that place. All my emails have come from white men i dont see many other races hypathetically speaking, on this site I have been in previous interracial relationships and have a child from a former husband whos twice my age I think you maybe are waiting for someone to contact you these privlaged men sometimes dont make the first move there spoiled lol, and you cant be too foreward or always try to play the victim just be normal. And you def. need more pics and clear ones.

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  • View author's info Posted on Jan 08, 2009 at 07:07 PM

    I think that if a caucasian man likes black women, it's going to matter how much either of them makes.
  • View author's info Posted on Jul 10, 2008 at 01:29 PM

    Your words are nice but your profile expresses differently.By the way I do carry myself very well and my late husband was white.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 22, 2008 at 10:07 AM

    I say to each his own. My philosophy has alway been . Is that every man ( because I do date out of my race if you will) has to treat me with the upmost respect. AND they do !!!!!! I expect no less.
    (Because I do date interracially)
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 19, 2007 at 08:24 PM

    This is a very personnal question, and unrelated, and I'm so sorry for that. But, Excite_Me- did you have a TT? I'm just asking cause I want one too, and I think I see the signs of one???
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