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Goldiggers: Male and Female
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Posted on Wed, Nov 16, 2005 00:31

I joined this site in hopes of meeting an educated and professional man since I am also educated and professional. I really do not care if the man is rich or not and would even sign a prenuptial agreement but.... I have been getting replies from men that I think are goldiggers. One was an 18 yr. old(I am 40) from a foreign country stating he wanted to meet me as soon as possible. Another, whom admited he was not rich, acted sweet on me until I told him I am not rich and then he poofed. Are MOST (NOT ALL) people on this site looking for a free ride?

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A RHETORICAL OR CYNICAL QUESTION. IT IS AN INVITATION TO SHARE ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCES ON THE SITE.



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Posted on Tue, Dec 06, 2005 15:14

By this site having categories that search directly for things such as income, it's only provoking people to look for someone of wealth and inviting gold diggers to the scene. I personally am young, lost a lot of things in Hurricane Katrina (including my business), and have a ton of ideas to make a nice amount of money, but no money to fund it. Now I'd LOVE to find a benefactor who would help me fund my ideas and accomplish my dreams, but seriously money is no issue. All I'm looking for is friendship, as I believe anything else should come thus after. Not looking for a relationship directly, but I'm not running from one either. Who knows, maybe I'll make a friend who has nothing to do better with their money than help someone else (investment) instead of it just sitting in the bank collecting dust.



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Posted on Tue, Dec 06, 2005 00:42

GlennaB write:

mailorderman write:
Yupp. that's me.. I'm waiting for that 70 year old widow to fly me to her mansion..

In time they'll show you their true colors..



Thats funny, I have a feeling you'll be waiting along time though... lol
IM NO GOLD DIGGER I JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN.

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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 16:39

if they cannot see it through our eyes cutieful, they will never know...which are the windows of our soul...



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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 16:37

Cutieful write:
BLONDEINDIAN:
Thanks for replying. We will both find someone. Have no doubt. It may happen here or elsewhere but it is just a matter of time.

you said it sister, cause god don't make junk..

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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 15:53

BLONDEINDIAN:
Thanks for replying. We will both find someone. Have no doubt. It may happen here or elsewhere but it is just a matter of time.



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Posted on Sun, Nov 20, 2005 10:39

435 previews of my profile, many winks, lots of emails, and im still looking?it is hard to get one to be straight with me, they all seem like they are playing a game, its not fun, going through your whole life with someone, for what? I want what everyone wants, love, your chances are as good as mine cutieful, we are smart, pretty ladies and we just want someone to share it with, be it a rich guy or a poor one...



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Posted on Sat, Nov 19, 2005 06:09

BLONDEINDIAN:Thank You. I am curious..what type of responses have you gotten thus far?



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Posted on Sat, Nov 19, 2005 05:16

Cutieful write:
MAILORDER:
I don't have a bleeding heart. I never had any kind of emotional attachment to these people that I mentioned and I am not seeking consolation or healing. I was trying to poll member experiences to discern if this is the best personals site for me. Different sites attract different people and I signed up to meet educated professionals like myself. After the aforementioned experiences it occured to me that PERHAPS because of it's name the site had attracted a surplus of fortune hunters rather than the population I was seeking to connect with. THAT DOES NOT MEAN I THINK EVERYONE ON SITE IS A GOLD DIGGER. There are good and bad people everywhere-on and off line. I was just trying to evaluate the wisdom of my decision to join this particular site vs. some of its competitors. But thanks for your concern.It was really sweet of you

I really like your insights cutiful, your a smart cookie babe your gonna do just fine on here...



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Posted on Thu, Nov 17, 2005 08:01

MAILORDER:
I don't have a bleeding heart. I never had any kind of emotional attachment to these people that I mentioned and I am not seeking consolation or healing. I was trying to poll member experiences to discern if this is the best personals site for me. Different sites attract different people and I signed up to meet educated professionals like myself. After the aforementioned experiences it occured to me that PERHAPS because of it's name the site had attracted a surplus of fortune hunters rather than the population I was seeking to connect with. THAT DOES NOT MEAN I THINK EVERYONE ON SITE IS A GOLD DIGGER. There are good and bad people everywhere-on and off line. I was just trying to evaluate the wisdom of my decision to join this particular site vs. some of its competitors. But thanks for your concern.It was really sweet of you

  


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Posted on Wed, Nov 16, 2005 00:37

BLONDE and MAIL ORDER-HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO YOU BOTH! HOPE IT WAS HAPPY
Blonde, you are right. I am sure there is good bad and ugly in the world overall and what goes on in this site is a reflection of that. I am hopeful that I will find a nice man:-) That's why I asked if most(not all) were looking for a free ride. I wrote the post and disclosed my experiences on the site as a way to invite others that have on line dating disaster stories to share theirs.

  


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Posted on Tue, Nov 15, 2005 06:16

Cutieful write:
I joined this site in hopes of meeting an educated and professional man since I am also educated and professional. I really do not care if the man is rich or not and would even sign a prenuptial agreement but.... I have been getting replies from men that I think are goldiggers. One was an 18 yr. old(I am 40) from a foreign country stating he wanted to meet me as soon as possible. Another, whom admited he was not rich, acted sweet on me until I told him I am not rich and then he poofed. Are most of the people on this site just looking for a free ride?

cutieful, aaawwwhhh...join the club of dating online, it is crazy gurl on here, but you are right to a degree...The green cards, and the gold diggers are out there, and so are some sweet hearts, i have more rich guy friends than lovers, but they're are some good ones sweety, just give it time...

  


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Posted on Fri, Nov 11, 2005 21:21

BC girl,
I think there is a difference between being self sufficient and being an easy mark. I also think both men and women choose people that they find physically attractive to them and it isn't necessary to put a price on one's affections because of that. I do not want a man that thinks I am for sale because I am not. I am here looking for someone like myself: someone smart, professional, educated, reasonably attractive and sexual. Those things are far more important than money and they will truly impress me.
Mahogany: great post:-) What is it someone said: the joy is in the journey? I agree with the no rushing part, but I also think that there are steps one can take to meet the right person such as screening out obviously wrong choices such as married men and men that are not ready for anything. I am perfectly willing to take things slowly as long as I know the man is genuinely interested and avaialable for a relationship with me. I am just not available to audition for the role of wife hoping to convince anyone of my worth.



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Posted on Fri, Nov 11, 2005 19:15

(Cutieful write:
Are most of the people on this site just looking for a free ride?)


I think there may be a mix of those looking for a free ride and those who are seeking educated and professional friends and companions like you said.

(Cutieful write:
I joined this site in hopes of meeting an educated and professional man since I am also educated and professional. I really do not care if the man is rich or not and would even sign a prenuptial agreement....I am not rich,not even close, but I don't have my hand out for someone else's goods either.)


AMEN TO THAT!!! I am working towards my career goals and will one day achieve my financial goals BUT it will be because of my ambition and hard work. I have a "millionaire" heart and am generous to a fault but I would take offense of anyone hunting me out under the guise of "companionship" just to reach into my pockets. That's such a turn-off and I'm quite sure those that are established are quite aware of that game. I also believe that's why there are a lot of complaints on this board about the search "taking too long". I sooooooo want to say, "Get on with your life and when YOU ARE where you need to be, a partner will appear.

I'm here to make friends, contacts and yes, hopefully along the way meet someone that is worthy of me and me them. It's not going to happen in a few weeks or even a few months. This is a crazy and fickle world so you REALLY need to get to know people truly and honestly to be able to make such an important decision.

So I feel everyone should just enjoy conversing with one another and not expect so much to happen so fast.

Just my thoughts...



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Posted on Fri, Nov 11, 2005 17:23

I am so sorry to hear about your bad experience. I had three of those 3 nigerian scam jerks hit on me too.

Lol,I was not really expecting the golddiggers to reply. My message was aimed at those that, like you, have had experiences analogous to mine. They are much more interesting than the golddiggers and I was seeking common ground :-). I am interested in hearing their experiences. However, it wouldn't surprise me if some golddiggers would indeed stand up and announce it. Some have already and followed it with questions such as what's wrong with wanting to be taken care of and the like. I personally cringe when I read that because it sounds so childish. I think one can realistically expect to be desired, wanted, spoiled by someone's affection and by all means loved. One can also expect to feel those things for another person, but to be taken care of? That's what parents do for their children,not lovers for each other.

Sadly, some people fall for Nigerian scammers. There was an instance in Ithaca, NY (about an hour from me) where someone ended up being shot as a result because the person scammed involved a friend that took it badly when he found he had been had. I guess sometimes people want something so badly, they want to believe things that are far fetched. If I had been a desperate woman, I could have thought an 18 yr. old kid was a catch. I am not, so I didn't but the scammers are relentless. They will move from one person to another until they find the one that is needy enough to fall for their scam.



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Posted on Fri, Nov 11, 2005 15:04

sorry, maybe you misunderstood my response. Let me simplify, as sometimes I do ramble.

Do you really expect anyone to post back that they are a gold digger?

I mean sure you might stand up and announce that you are an alcholic at the AA meeting, but are you going to be so bold at the bar???

BTW, I think your premenitions(?) about being approached by golddiggers based on what you said are probably correct. :o) I have been approached in a similar manner several times.

I had this happen last year when I was single and online. A woman in Nashville wrote me out of the blue and we traded a few mails. Lost contact and then several weeks later got an mail from her, and she popped up on the yaWho IM...

Basically, she had gone to Nigeria to meet an internet date. ... Once she got there she realized that he wasn't who he said he was and then he robbed her and took all her money and clothes and now the Hotel Operator would not let her leave until she paid him $350. Please, Please, Please could you send it to me??? Happened to be a couple weeks before Christmas. She even offered to speak to me on the phone, so I did a search and sent her the number for the US Embassy there...

It is amazing the gaul of some people, but I guess there must be someone/ somewhere that is falling for it, or else, they would quit trying from the failures.



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Posted on Fri, Nov 11, 2005 14:35

Robtest: No need to announce what isn't true. I am a self made person with a sound education-2 yrs of post grad work, a nice job as a mental health professional and some assets of my own. I am not rich,not even close, but I don't have my hand out for someone else's goods either. If you had taken the time to read my post throughly, you would have seen I am willing to sign a prenup if needed to reassure the right man I am not after his money or assets and that the question was a response to my previous experiences on this site,not rhetorical. I had an 18 yr. old from a foreign country say he couldn't wait to meet me. What does an 18 yr. old man want with a 40 yr. old woman? Sorry to sound cynical but my first impulse was to look for a hidden agenda because while women tend to look for older men(more inclined to settle down and start a family)men seem to do the opposite. So being approached by someone that young seemed far fetched. Also, another fellow poofed after finding out I wasn't a millionaire. That was my reason for wondering,my experiences on the site prior to my posting here. I am neither looking for a free ride nor respect people that are. You want something? You work for it. That's the way I was raised and that's what I do. I believe that's what self respecting people do. If you can not be bought, you can not be sold and that gives you options. When you hold your own purse strings, you don't have to put up with abuse;you don't have to endure a cheating partner. If you are not treated well, you can walk because your meals and shelter do not depend on someone else's generosity or charity. It's what makes you an equal partner instead of a pet.



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Posted on Fri, Nov 11, 2005 13:02

I accept the fact that a relationship is hard work, and I am willing to do that with the right partner. But as far as free rides? Well, I guess that depends on where it was going and who the travel partner was...

Sorry that is kinda tongue in cheek, but it does seem like a rhetorical question, as if you were searching for the free ride, are you really gonna stand up and announce it?



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