I've worked some odd jobs in my life, to keep me in paints and canvas, and many of them have been male-oriented. I worked as a Draftsman for Public Works and Atomic Energy. I've worked at Energy, Mines & Resources Canada as a Journeyman Contact Frame Operator in a sub-basement with 70 men and no other women!
I've been a Reserve Firefighter ... now there was a job where the men had a plan.... in case of a brush fire spreading fast .... the women were to grab the children and run like blazes (pardon) to the Trans Canada Highway.
One day we had a brush fire. I grabbed a scarf for my nose, my sunglasses, my thick-soled work runners and a shovel. One of the guys running to the fire looked at me and said, Hey! Get back to camp and help the women!"
I ran past him, saying, "Shut up Gary! You think those socks are gonna protect your feet in your sandals?"
He had to go back. (snort)
I've never had a man, other than Gary, tell me I couldn't do what I was doing. Which says a lot for men nowadays.
Not sure if this is appropriate, but addressing the issue of pretensions...
"If I had my life over, I would dare to make more mistakes.
I would relax.
I would limber up.
I would be sillier than I have been on this trip.
I would take fewer things seriously.
I would take more chances.
I would go more places.
I would climb more mountains, swim more rivers and watch more sunsets.
I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans.
I would have more real troubles and fewer imaginary ones.
You see, I have been one of those people who live prudently and prophylactically, hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I've had my moments... and if I had to do it again I would have more of them; one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of each day.
I have been one of those people who never go anywhere without aspirin, a thermometer, a gargle, a map, a raincoat and a parachute. If I had to do it over, I would travel lighter.
I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall.
I would keep later hours.
I would have more lovers.
I would throw more parties.
I would ride more merry-go-rounds.
I'd pick more daisies."
Maayan...yes we seem to overlap in our threads..but who cares...I think your job sure has some funny hazardous tales too..lol..yea I once took acab to the airport and made the mistake of telling the cab driver I was a lawyer and next thing I know I ahd to give him legal advice on his divorce , felt so bad after hearing his sad tale that I had to give him a big tip...lol
www... princess and lawyers are nice ladies too if you know them well enough...
Well,'finding out' here is done way before you even step into a room..I once was invited to a dinner party in the country, the hostess (her Ladyship) whom I barely know, sent me an invitation at least one month ahead including an itinerary of the weekend, and dress code..and a long CV about the guests and their background but the list excludes your CV and what she said about you!! So inevitably you become weary about what the other guests know about your background..such a silly game..and the list will have the right titles and mini history of the other guests so that you avoid certain taboo subjects or connections..so so tedious that it sure kills any kind of spontaneity one might have for a weekend country party...tennis, horseriding, shoots when the men would go off in the morning and the ladies will have morning coffee or walks in the garden or riding, afternoon tea, Sunday roasts..and proper dressed up sit-down and crystal ware on display dinners followed sometimes by barn dance or even proper ball...I think you often feel after such a weekend you need the whole week to recuperate from that social stress...lol..of course very close friends' countryhouse weekends are less intimidating and that I don't mind so much ..so when we mention the 'country house' party it is a different scene completely from the 'hill-billy' variety of simple folks and simple life I am afraid...one needs proper education to unravel this ritualistic lifestyle ...lol
In US, it depends on who you are dealing with. For instance, its rude to ask a farmer how many acres of land or how many cows you have, or oil wells. Simple multiplication gives you some idea of a persons wealth. Many very wealthy people live very simply and do not "put on airs" as they say. City folks are more likely to play it up big, but not even a lot of those do (except the social climbers and wantabees).
I like the country folks best. They are more real.
The people in the country in the US do like to know your background and if your folks are honest, good, etc. Harder to find out family reputations in the big cities.
ONe thing the Brits don't do that the Americans do is compare wealth.. it is taboo in the uppercrust circle here that $ is ever mentioned but their flaunting is more subtle..it is all about their holidays,where their country homes are , their exclusive hobbies like shooting, beagling, skiing , Ascot, Newbury for racing with their own studs..etc and of course their posh accent and trivia jokes from particular boarding schools..so 'exclusivity' here means u sure feel excluded when they talk in their own social codes..and when u go to their castles, mansions or homes you will know they play it down and it is full of old artifacts and antiques handed down thru generations, old is good here to impress..it is what you inherit that impress and not what u just bought..so antique business does well for a show of wealth in the most subtle way...lol
The Americans I find are more open and less contrived in wanting to know your background or heritage..
The art of flirtation here is sophisticated in that it makes references to obscure and exclusive literature and seasonal events...yet they don't realise that it also means they are showing their narrowness and their own insecurity in so doing..
a very cute advert here showed old ladies reminiscing about their young hot blooded days, and all they wish was that they had more 'grass stains' on their dresses...i.e. rolling in the hay stack and lawn in the summer with their beau..each season is hailed with their respective 'must go ' events..next week my son's elite college has its 'founder's day' picnic ..mothers would do anything to have their daughters invited to that event for the last 700 years..lol My son will be inundated by 8:1 girls galore ..girls everywhere , beauty parade in flirty summer dresses..how could my poor son concentrate on his exams the following week!? It is Jane Austen country and the hunting game is still played out the same old way for centuries..
Pretty funny, Bernie. For a second I thought you were getting ready to unleash a barage of lawyers jokes. Way back when, I knew a guy that sold some stuff to Walmart. He had to go to Bentonville to sell them. He said he worked with the buyer in a converted chicken coop. It doesn't get much more folksy, than that.
I have been scanning "Sam Walton
Made in America" book. It looks like everyone should read this book, especially reading about his families attitude toward being the richest people in the world. Also his philosophy toward customers and "associates" (employees).
Lessons to be learned there.
Sharp, Bonnie. Wow. You ladies have really opened this discussion up. I go along with Bonnie on flirting as an art form. As far as the intimidation factor is concerned, IMHO, it is more of an individual thing than a gender issue. One lesson to be learned here may be: Just don't flirt with lawyers.
Thanks for telling me what goes on in CAlgary..lol I had no idea that it was a redneck place nor one with so many oil industry professionals then.Would have love to chat up those burly guys. lol..All we wanted was a nice night out but our host in his enthusiasm made the wrong move and scared those poor guys who must have imagined us as 3 macho butch type girls.
Most of the time I prefer to go incognito and rarely mention what i do for a living but when I start talking usually more like interogating (subconscious Freudian slip..lol) , after a while most men would be curious about my background, because I tend to discuss business and their jobs like their equal.
I don't get 'intimidated response' when I am among fellow legal practitioners and you are right we are a bloody clickish profession and rarely venture out of our tight circle...esp here in London where there is a marked class distinction.
It is usually the non-lawyers that get intimidated or weary..when they find out..
But sometimes flirting could get me into real serious trouble too..you know leading them up the wrong path when my flirting gets misunderstood :)
Flirtation is an art which could be lost to some men, and I remembered having had two guys argue over who is to bring me home after a party when I was younger and wished I could drive myself to the party instead...
NOw, why is it then that women are never intimidated by men who hold powerful jobs? Cos we are able to not tak them seriously and flirt with them incessantly...and outside their office I treat them like any other men..or more like little boys who need alot of TLC and attention..
<<and if u meet me in person I m actually rather demure and would rarely argue at all in a social scenario..but flirt..YES! >>>
I don't doubt that Bonnie. It has been my experience that most really sucessful people, both men and women, don't have the need to tell others about it. The same can be said for those that really have money. Flirting!!! Now that is a whole different story. LOL..Bill
Bill..it was about 20 years ago or more..the world hopefully has changed but even now I am still in the minority when I attend meetings. Strangely it is in the Fareast and Asia that I find more professional women at meetings there and men do respect them as well. In my years as a lawyer in both the East and the West, I found women have a harder time in the west proving themselves in a predominantly male job.
www.. I m not even talking about marriage just going out for a drink!!
and if u meet me in person I m actually rather demure and would rarely argue at all in a social scenario..but flirt..YES!