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What is the barrier between upper-class and the military?!
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Posted on Tue, Jun 06, 2006 08:41

Everytime I am on a first date women ask about what you do for a living. When it is a woman who is successful and has her sh!t together, and she finds out I am in the Air Force, she loses all interest. WHY! That has to be the absolutely infuriating thing ever.

Hell, I don't care if you are a cashier at Walgreens or if you own Nike. What is the deal? Why do women run from military guys? Any insight?



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Posted on Thu, Nov 02, 2006 09:34

I on your side man. I'm in the Army. But don't worry about it. I inherited a lot of money but I don't tell any women that. I like to have people form an unbiased opinion of me based on my life not my net worth.



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Posted on Sat, Aug 12, 2006 08:55

RapRed is right, sweetie. So are the others about your picture. Honestly, your picture on here makes it appear that you are more bitter and resentful then kind and caring. A man that is forgiving of a relation gone bad would post the picture without destroying it and simply state it was the only one he had with him at the time. Why not post one of your military photos instead? Much more appealing and everyone knows they do the military photos, etc.

The other aspect is that military men are more known for being "players". They know they are going to leave, etc. and sadly, have that rep built up in the mindset of young women. Even older. You will hear parents of daughters all over the place telling their angels that.

But, honestly, Red is very accurate. When a woman is looking to settle down and date, she is looking for a lifelong husband and to be in one place. Not all over the place all the time. That is ever harder on children and their emotional development. Look at all the kids that get older and their excuse for their behavior is "I'm an Army brat." I have worked with many at youth centers all over the US and counseling offices and they will be the first to tell you they hate the life and wish they could have a real friend, real school, etc. Women don't want their children to go through anything hurtful.

And most don't want the strict lifestyle either. lol They like it more relaxed. Like the one guy said....the one bar was the best. Military was never faulted for having bad parties, but the girls who settle aren't looking for a party.

Best of luck to you, though....



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Posted on Sat, Aug 12, 2006 01:42

Well the military dilemma is a good one. I just left the military in December. Here is what I found out in that time. It doesn't matter if you are military or not. Trust me, I just realized that I was getting just about the same amount brush offs. It is because some think that the military personnel are unfaithful or will leave for long periods. However the same goes for a civilian job. I have to travel a lot and I get almost the same brush offs. The fact is you just have not met the right one that will be understanding and compassionate towards your career. Maybe you are looking for the ones that are shallow and do not understand what a respectable career you hold. Good luck and keep up the fight. You will get there soon. Don't linger on this for too long because it will change your attitude and become negative. Negativity is sensed even though it isn't seen. Look for women that have some brains!



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Posted on Thu, Jun 15, 2006 08:37

Hey Chris, im ex. military,Royal Engineers, we got asked out to all the best parties, meet all kinds of people, the officers mess was the best night club in town, the girls loved the gold braid, spurs and big sword.
Hang on in there



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Posted on Thu, Jun 15, 2006 08:19

Cutie, I think it is the mind set of people. In 2000 I was in St. Thomas, BVI on business. Went out for dinner and drinks one evening with a couple of other ladies. One of them was from Miami, FL. A US Navy ship had come into port that day and she wanted to find the bar all the sailor boys had gone to that night to pick one up! In my mind I was thinking, "Really?" quite surprised by this. She was 36 and I was 40 at the time. I couldn't imagine someone her age being keen on a military guy. Maybe 20 yrs earlier I might have had her mindset, but through all my experiences over the past 20 yrs, eg. college, work, family life, social status...things have changed for me. I still consider myself the same person and don't judge others, but my standards have risen considerably. We are shaped by our lives experiences.



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Posted on Wed, Jun 14, 2006 17:51

Chris, Okay I read your post and personally I dont understand why a female wouldnt want to date a guy in the military. When I was your age I loved military guys and had a great time with them. Look, Im not hitting on you or anything, but I fixed your photo the best I could. Hows about you copy this for now, and post this one instead? Dont be disillusioned, I really cant understand why any woman wouldnt want to date someone in the military. I dont think there is much difference between the actions of military or non-military guys. Alot of guys have one in every port, not just military. You just have to wait for the right one to come along. She will show up. Take care, and change your photo.



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Posted on Wed, Jun 14, 2006 09:12

All American. You have received many good reasons for your delemma. If you are in the service y6ou might just think about doing the long stretch. At your age it would be worth it. You can finish High school, do college band prepare for admittance into the very hard ,cruel world. And you can do it and "date" all at the same time. Get some years and some experience under your belt before you try and find "the one" It's harder to make it now. So education is a very important part and the service will provide all for you free of charge. You couldn't get that out here!!!



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Posted on Sat, Jun 10, 2006 18:56

I would have to say it is because men in the military tend to be away months at a time. My brother is in the military and just divorced because out of the 3 years he was married, he was home for only 21 months.



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Posted on Fri, Jun 09, 2006 22:59

fair enough. . .



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Posted on Thu, Jun 08, 2006 21:38

AllAmerican...I read everyone's posts and didn't think anyone was being overly harsh on you, just expressing their honest opinion.
RapturousRed has alot of good points. And Rob also brought up a good one. You quit College. Until you finish your own degree, no successful lady with her "sheet" together is going to consider you on the same playing level. And they will be looking for someone as driven as themselves. If you can't finish your degree in College, you're not exactly showing qualities of having drive! Know what I mean?

Here is another view ... men in the military have a bad reputation ... especially guys in the airforce ... like ... military guys have a girlfriend in every port!

So if you want a successful lady, you need to be successful yourself...and it starts with finishing your education in a field that will actually land you a job when you get out.

Good luck!



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Posted on Thu, Jun 08, 2006 16:06

AllAmericanJeep write:
hmm you guys are kind of rough.
Just because the most recent photo I have is with a girl I'm not good enough? Also, it's not magic marker. The editing is from gIMP image editor (if anyone is a linux nerd.)

Yes, I went to college and did pretty well. I did not finish but the credits I earned went towards my rank at enlistment. I will be finishing my degree through the Air Force.

Okay why did this turn into a self defense thread?

You asked for feedback, it's not an attack. If you were my little brother, I'd tell you the same thing except you'd also get a nuggy. Don't post a picture with the ex altered out in any way. You managed to black out her pretty face, but you left in her cleavage! There is nothing more off-putting to a woman than a photo like that. It looks like you aren't really serious.



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Posted on Wed, Jun 07, 2006 18:01

Thanks for the insight. I appreciate it.
I didnt know my picture would get people so weary about me. I'll change it. I dont expect to meet anyone on this site either. Pretty much joined to ask this question. . .

Thank you ma'am,
Chris



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Posted on Wed, Jun 07, 2006 16:20

Granted, I didn't marry someone in the service, but I was raised in the life style. It is difficult. Now older, consider these from a woman's perspective:

1. You go away and you could die (much sooner than most).
2. You move a lot. It is difficult to form lasting relationships with people when you know you're leaving in two, maybe three years. Plus, all that packing, unpacking is not only horrid in itself, but often precious memorabilia is lost over the course of time.
3. You're usually not around your family. For some, this could be a bonus (smile). This often means more if you have children.
4. Hate to say it, but here it is: Unless you're an officer, the pay isn't all that great. What a shame too. Here you are doing all the above and not closely well compensated for it.

But if you're looking here, you might also consider Sunshine's advice. Get the female cropped out of your pic or if it's a sister, then don't scratch out her face.

Be well!



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Posted on Wed, Jun 07, 2006 10:39

hmm you guys are kind of rough.
Just because the most recent photo I have is with a girl I'm not good enough? Also, it's not magic marker. The editing is from gIMP image editor (if anyone is a linux nerd.)

Yes, I went to college and did pretty well. I did not finish but the credits I earned went towards my rank at enlistment. I will be finishing my degree through the Air Force.

Okay why did this turn into a self defense thread?



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Posted on Wed, Jun 07, 2006 08:31

I am going to take a giant leap and say that the upper-class is not going to post a photo with the woman's face scratched through with a magic marker.



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Posted on Wed, Jun 07, 2006 05:58

AllAmericanJeep write:
Everytime I am on a first date women ask about what you do for a living. When it is a woman who is successful and has her sh!t together, and she finds out I am in the Air Force, she loses all interest. WHY! That has to be the absolutely infuriating thing ever.

Hell, I don't care if you are a cashier at Walgreens or if you own Nike. What is the deal? Why do women run from military guys? Any insight?


Greetings from Norcross!

This is just a guess, as I am obviously not a female. But I have dated a few...

But you are at the age that it is nearly the end of after HS did you goto visit Uncle Sam or to college. I would probably be making assumptions but most of the successful women with the "sheetz" together probably went to college. That would impose an educational gap. They want a peer maybe?

Hang in there though. Maybe you just haven't met the right one... That is not such an easy thing. I have been divorced for a decade now, and I am still looking for the right one!!!



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