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BeWell
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Posted on Thu, Feb 14, 2013 07:18

Quoting RealtorLulu:

Hope;

 

You are so right (and hilarious).

 

BeWell,

 

I agree with Hope. The possibility of the man showing up at the library at about the same time and day is good. Most people who frequent the library have a certain schedule they stick with. I hope you find him again and next time, SAY SOMETHING!!  Good luck!!



Thanks, LuLu................ I'll report in next Tuesday to let you know if he showed up for a second chance.  If he shows up I will for sure try to keep the conversation going much longer.

 

Thanks again!............... BeWell



BeWell and wishing you only the best ! ..................;-D

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BeWell
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Posted on Thu, Feb 14, 2013 06:10

Quoting rmac22:

What more should you have done?  Ask him out for coffee?  Not all married men wear rings.

 

RMac

 



Hi RMac,

 

Well, I thought of asking him for coffee. I guess my thinking at the time was, that if he's available and a take-charge kind of guy, he'll do something to keep me from leaving.

 

Most women want their men to be confident and want them to take the lead.

 

I wish all married men did wear rings. It's not fair to us single ladies. ;-D

 

I appreciate you for helping................... BeWell



BeWell and wishing you only the best ! ..................;-D

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BeWell
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Posted on Thu, Feb 14, 2013 06:02

Quoting Dakota35:

You should have just asked him if he was interested...if you were.  Some guys don't act shy but really are under the surface.  Maybe you'll almost get hit by a car with him once again, then you'll know it's destiny. :)  You did nothing wrong...guys act that way.  He probably went home and beat himself up for not asking you out.



Dakota,

LOL! I'll for sure be looking twice for rogue little old lady drivers when I go back Tuesday. ;-D

 

Thanks for letting me know I did nothing wrong. I'm going back next week just in case he thinks of the possibility that I might do that.

 

I didn't want to be the aggressive one, because in my past I've usually been the one to make the first move.  My guy friends and guy relatives have told me to stop doing that, and let guys be guys. I understand and honor that men are the hunters and need to do the tracking. It's in the male DNA. So this approach of letting the guy make the first move is kind of new to me.

 

When I look at my past history, the best relationships I've had have been the ones where the guy made the first move fairly quickly.

 

Many thanks again.............BeWell

 



BeWell and wishing you only the best ! ..................;-D

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BeWell
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Posted on Thu, Feb 14, 2013 05:43

Quoting Windrider735:

Hi BeWell...

Just out of curiosity, why didn't you ask the librarian for his name and see if s/he knew if he was married? If it were me, I'd go back to the library and read there several times a week until he shows up again. Then just grab a pile of books, hold your head down and run into him. You can ask him out for a cup of coffee to repay him for helping you gather up the spilled books. Would he see through that? Of course, but if he had a sense of humor he'd enjoy the fact you made that much of an effort to meet him...or you could just go over and ask him if he had to 'dodge the old lady again'.
'Course, Hope will disagree with me. She doesn't believe in making the first move. First moves have been some of the most entertaining times of my life. I'm not talking pushy here...just flirty, teasing fun! Some of the best friends I have in my life were met this way. It doesn't mean they aren't the tale-charge type of men...just that they appreciate a woman with a sense of humor who would go to that length to get to know them. A person can never have too many friends, and it doesn't always involve wanting to get to know someone as a potential mate, but rather just someone you'd like to get to know as another human being. If something should develop on down the line...fine. If not, both of you are enriched by becoming a part of each other's lives. 
Okay, so maybe Hope's right...I am an oddball, but a very happy, content oddball with a cornucopia of friends that have made my life a rich tapestry of diverse interests and learning.


Windrider,

Thanks for your ideas.

 

I wish I could have asked the librarian for his name but unfortunately our library has the self-check out system. If somebody tries to get out without properly checking out, a big alarm goes off at the door. There are only a few librarians working there now, and they are hard to find when you need them. Kind of like Walmart. Ha!

 

Love your idea about staging a book spilling. LOL! I wish I had thought of that in the moment when he bumped into me. It might have worked. Instead I just whispered, "Wanna dance?", which is kind of a local colloquialism said by people our age when you bump into someone and you do that little right-left thing trying to get around them.

 

Thanks again for your help............ BeWell

 

 



BeWell and wishing you only the best ! ..................;-D

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rmac22
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 19:10

On second thought, maybe you should have asked him out for a cup of coffee.

 

Seriously, I have had ladies blatantly flirt with me and maybe even flirted a bit back all the while being oblivious.  Since it is not at all the usual thing, (more the pity) I am not always ready for it.

 

I occasionally have innocently mentioned something to an attractive lady in line at the grocery store.  Now let me tell you some ladies know how to keep a conversation going. 

 

RMac

 



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RealtorLulu
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 18:15

Hope;

 

You are so right (and hilarious).

 

BeWell,

 

I agree with Hope. The possibility of the man showing up at the library at about the same time and day is good. Most people who frequent the library have a certain schedule they stick with. I hope you find him again and next time, SAY SOMETHING!!  Good luck!!



Lulu in Dallas

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Windrider735
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 17:30

Hi BeWell...

Just out of curiosity, why didn't you ask the librarian for his name and see if s/he knew if he was married? If it were me, I'd go back to the library and read there several times a week until he shows up again. Then just grab a pile of books, hold your head down and run into him. You can ask him out for a cup of coffee to repay him for helping you gather up the spilled books. Would he see through that? Of course, but if he had a sense of humor he'd enjoy the fact you made that much of an effort to meet him...or you could just go over and ask him if he had to 'dodge the old lady again'.
'Course, Hope will disagree with me. She doesn't believe in making the first move. First moves have been some of the most entertaining times of my life. I'm not talking pushy here...just flirty, teasing fun! Some of the best friends I have in my life were met this way. It doesn't mean they aren't the tale-charge type of men...just that they appreciate a woman with a sense of humor who would go to that length to get to know them. A person can never have too many friends, and it doesn't always involve wanting to get to know someone as a potential mate, but rather just someone you'd like to get to know as another human being. If something should develop on down the line...fine. If not, both of you are enriched by becoming a part of each other's lives. 
Okay, so maybe Hope's right...I am an oddball, but a very happy, content oddball with a cornucopia of friends that have made my life a rich tapestry of diverse interests and learning.


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BeWell
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 15:12

Quoting Hoping4Love2000:

Awwww... BEWELL.....

 

Sounds like it was a nice "flirt" session...  ;)

 

My guess, (since he wasn't shy) ...

 

1) He possibly has a girlfriend--- or even a wife, (not all men wear wedding rings and this is not necessarily a hint of their dedication to marriage) 

 

2) He could be very single, but is self-aware enough to know he isn't ready for a relationship, which is what dating leads to. There are a lot of individuals who KNOW they just aren't ready to jump back in the fish bowl, so they avoid it... LIKE THE PLAGUE!! LOL...  

 

Or 3) He may be kicking himself right about now wondering, "Why didn't I ask that woman out!" But, social butterflies seldom concern themselves with rejection.

 

HOWEVER, 

 

You said you RESPONDED WITH SMILES? Did you not speak to him when he was flirting? I mean, no, "Oh, there's the man I was almost buried next to today!" or, "Wonder if that woman hit anyone on the other side of the parking lot?" 

 

SMILES ONLY GO SO FAR. If ALL you did was smile or nod and never engaged in "drawing him in" by conversation, then yes, I'd say YOU didn't do enough and he may be wondering the same thing you are.. "What did I do wrong! Why didn't that woman talk to me! I made jokes, bumped into her... What does it take!!" 

 

Ladies, smiles are for across the room to get the man "hither."

 

 

 

A begging puppy will leave your area if you don't pet him... and will find another area with someone who will!

 

AS FOR JUST "FLIRTY PEOPLE......"

 

I had a customer when I worked as a server / bartender at a yacht club... He flirted with ALL the women, even in front of his wife! He was a riot! His wife would laugh it off because she knew his personality. It was just who he is. He was also the one who came dressed up in a hula skirt and coconuts for boobs and wore red lipstick for the party, and the loudest one when he got a bit tipsy! I NEVER HEARD RUMORS OR SAW ANY INDICATION OF HIM STRAYING... BUT THAT MAN FLIRTED WITH ANYTHING WITH 2 LEGS AND BREAST! LOL...

 

I think you should go back to the library around the same time a few times. Esp. next week on the SAME DAY. Just in case it's my guess #3..... 

 

Now the bigger issue is... 

 

Did you, or the man, take down the elderly ladies license plate and send it in? Drivers like that are very dangerous! I'd hate to see her run over some child who got away from her mother for a second, or for her to swerve in heavy speeding traffic and create deaths along the way. Drivers like this are akin to drunk drivers. They don't belong on the road! 

 

** Excuse me.. I'm getting ready to head out now to the latest "hot spot" for men... 

 

THE LIBRARY! I'll watch out for crazy old ladies though! ;) 



Thank you, Hope!

 

Yes, I did have a little verbal interaction with Mr. Flirtation, both on the parking lot and in the library. But it didn't go anywhere. You're probably right. He may be unavailable and just a flirt.

 

I just didn't know if I should have done something more to signal to him that I was interested without being too forward. Now that I've had time to think about it, I think I handled it perfectly well. I will give him a second chance just in case he is available and had second thoughts--he knows my videos are due next Tuesday. So I plan to show up at the library at the same time to make my return hoping he might be there. And if not, it's all in Divne Order with the Universe and probably wasn't meant to be anyway.

 

By the way... never got a chance to get the little old lady's license plate number, but that was a good thought you had. We were both too rattled and surprised from almost being knocked down and comforting each other about what had just happened  to have thought about turning her in.

 

Thanks for your help................ BeWell 

 

 



BeWell and wishing you only the best ! ..................;-D

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Hoping4Love2000
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 08:45

Awwww... BEWELL.....

 

Sounds like it was a nice "flirt" session...  ;)

 

My guess, (since he wasn't shy) ...

 

1) He possibly has a girlfriend--- or even a wife, (not all men wear wedding rings and this is not necessarily a hint of their dedication to marriage) 

 

2) He could be very single, but is self-aware enough to know he isn't ready for a relationship, which is what dating leads to. There are a lot of individuals who KNOW they just aren't ready to jump back in the fish bowl, so they avoid it... LIKE THE PLAGUE!! LOL...  

 

Or 3) He may be kicking himself right about now wondering, "Why didn't I ask that woman out!" But, social butterflies seldom concern themselves with rejection.

 

HOWEVER, 

 

You said you RESPONDED WITH SMILES? Did you not speak to him when he was flirting? I mean, no, "Oh, there's the man I was almost buried next to today!" or, "Wonder if that woman hit anyone on the other side of the parking lot?" 

 

SMILES ONLY GO SO FAR. If ALL you did was smile or nod and never engaged in "drawing him in" by conversation, then yes, I'd say YOU didn't do enough and he may be wondering the same thing you are.. "What did I do wrong! Why didn't that woman talk to me! I made jokes, bumped into her... What does it take!!" 

 

Ladies, smiles are for across the room to get the man "hither."

 

 

 

A begging puppy will leave your area if you don't pet him... and will find another area with someone who will!

 

AS FOR JUST "FLIRTY PEOPLE......"

 

I had a customer when I worked as a server / bartender at a yacht club... He flirted with ALL the women, even in front of his wife! He was a riot! His wife would laugh it off because she knew his personality. It was just who he is. He was also the one who came dressed up in a hula skirt and coconuts for boobs and wore red lipstick for the party, and the loudest one when he got a bit tipsy! I NEVER HEARD RUMORS OR SAW ANY INDICATION OF HIM STRAYING... BUT THAT MAN FLIRTED WITH ANYTHING WITH 2 LEGS AND BREAST! LOL...

 

I think you should go back to the library around the same time a few times. Esp. next week on the SAME DAY. Just in case it's my guess #3..... 

 

Now the bigger issue is... 

 

Did you, or the man, take down the elderly ladies license plate and send it in? Drivers like that are very dangerous! I'd hate to see her run over some child who got away from her mother for a second, or for her to swerve in heavy speeding traffic and create deaths along the way. Drivers like this are akin to drunk drivers. They don't belong on the road! 

 

** Excuse me.. I'm getting ready to head out now to the latest "hot spot" for men... 

 

THE LIBRARY! I'll watch out for crazy old ladies though! ;) 



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rmac22
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 05:29

What more should you have done?  Ask him out for coffee?  Not all married men wear rings.

 

RMac

 



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Dakota35
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Posted on Tue, Feb 12, 2013 23:16

You should have just asked him if he was interested...if you were.  Some guys don't act shy but really are under the surface.  Maybe you'll almost get hit by a car with him once again, then you'll know it's destiny. :)  You did nothing wrong...guys act that way.  He probably went home and beat himself up for not asking you out.



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