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A Once in a Lifetime Kind of Girl Sort by:
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ambergbay
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Posted on Sun, Feb 10, 2013 05:15

We live in a country full of great opportunity, arguably the most in the entire world. People die trying to get here to America, to their only real chance of making it. I envision bloated bodies being eaten by fish, as families wait to see if they will ever be called on, as they wait for a message of any kind. I imagine children wondering if they will ever see mom and dad again. “They said they would come back for us….”

I think about that when I feel like giving up, because sometimes I do. I think about broken families, and once in a lifetime chances when I consider being ordinary because I could be. I could be average; I could give up and let myself be average if this country hadn’t already promised to make me great by its opportunity.

 “You were born in a country that promises a win, a standard of life that includes HAPPY, WTF are you doing with your life AMBER GARIBAY???”

It seems to me that American’s have the largest responsibility on the planet by how much we boast. Words are nothing more than ideals without action, and substance. Our country is far greater that that. Our character is the thread of our flag which must always be held high, respectfully. We are the action of our beliefs, the work ethic, the pride and ingenuity; intelligence paired with the competence of follow through. I view my opportunity, my status as a citizen, as a responsibility of self.

I sometimes see a bar held so high that it feels like I can’t reach it and then I remember that people do. People make their dreams come true every day in this country and they do so with less than I can even imagine. I should be more in their honor, and I have no right to complain, but I do.

I complain because I know I can be better and so I strive to be. I catch myself because I forget we don’t all have the same agenda. Some people just don’t give a f*ck, and others…

He thanked me for my thoughtfulness, first for the emails, and second for making the drive to see him (four hours round trip). I smiled because the pleasure was mine; I own a business and am building a second career simultaneously; I understand busy. Thursday is my day off and I enjoyed both the drive and the compromise. It felt good to send him the message that I think he’s worth it. Why should a man have to put all the effort in during courtship?? He already has to pay for everything, travel I can do. I would go to the ends of the earth for people I care about and he was already on that list, too easily perhaps, but rightfully so by how much he made me smile. The grin was a fortune I was eager to pay back; I work so much I sometimes forget about fun. I’ve always fancied myself as an easy going, laid back kind of girl, fair and willing to make it work. Success is a choice and I wanted him to have the opportunity to have a woman like me in his life, one of consideration. He was a consideration, real potential by how much I believe in him until,

 “I do like getting your emails Amber, please just don’t get mad at me if I don’t reply to them…….. I’m busy. I hope you understand; I have a business to run.”

 I do understand because I am a business woman. I understand value, and that time is the most precious commodity there is. I would never burden someone with the obligation of caring unless I was paying for a service or product. If I was a client, HIS client, my emails would be returned. I know that just as I know that caring can be as simple as a gesture, however brief. His choice to pass on replying, to save himself time, sends the opposite and equally impactful statement. “Thank you for your caring, but it is not reciprocal.

I want people to care, but I can’t make them. I care regardless, perhaps more so with less. In the case of the gentleman mentioned above, I let it go without further mention, unless you count this post. He’s an amazing person with enough on his plate, plenty of obligation, and perhaps one less opportunity.  The power of that choice is his by actions; I merely gave him the gift of an opportunity, my friendship, which I will eventually rescind if taken for granted.

Once in a lifetime, I remember my ONE LIFE, when I consider being ordinary because I could be. I could be average; I could give up and let myself be average if this country hadn’t already promised to make me great by its opportunity. I feel the exact same way about love. I am a once in a lifetime kind of girl because that is all I have, ONE LIFE, and an opportunity to create my own version of happy.

Happily Ever After ;)


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The Life You Live is a CHOICE- I choose HAPPY :)

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Dakota35
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Posted on Wed, Feb 13, 2013 12:29

Wow!  I got a response...thanks Amber.  America is the Greatest country but not necessarily the best or most wonderful in terms of happiness.  As far as achievements, I believe we are on top.  I had a friend visit China for a few weeks to teach (she's a Dr. at a GA college) she said that the Chinese greatly admire Americans for their creativity and ingenuity...they said; "but we are good a copying things". LOL   They are good at copying things and making things of poor quality.  I believe some of the hatred of America, by foreigners, comes from jealousy, but some comes from seeing our morally unsound ways.  So Amber if you feel that it is your responsibility to live up to the world's view of a successful American then perhaps you should also look at how you present yourself morally. I wish you much success in your quest toward 10 million...as that has been my mark to hit also.

 

 



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ambergbay
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Posted on Tue, Feb 12, 2013 06:19

"A few comments:  First, Americans have been brainwashed into believing the USA is the most wonderful country in the world and people are literally dying to get here.  In some cases, that is true (according to which countries we are talking about).  But I've known foreigners that hate living in American.  And there are beautiful and wonderful places around the world.  In fact America was not voted to be the happiest place on Earth to live...and isn't happiness the most important thing?  Secondly, money will not make anyone happy...that is FACT.  Thirdly, If a man places his business over meeting a beautiful woman, that he finds interesting, then he made a mistake.  I made this mistake not long ago, now I regret it...as she emailed and told me that she is now dating someone.  Lesson learned."

 

Today is one of those rare occasions that I reply to a comment ;) Mostly I don't due to time restraints.

 

I agree with all points except one.

 

"American's are brainwashed into believing the USA is the most wonderful country in the world."

 

I mentioned love of country as a matter of PRIDE, for the reference point of having a responsibility to live up to its greatness as a citizen.

 

"If we are so great, WHY? Are we great by perception, or is there validity to the opinion by our action."

 

I met an Englishman; he works at Microsoft in Seattle. He abhors American culture and we spoke at great length about how many English people despise our blunt and overly transparent approach to things. We were of course have a "General" conversation. I was shocked to realize that we our behavior is so offensive to that part of the world. He insisted that he is not the only Englishman of that opinion, and after asking around I learned that he was on point.

 

I was shocked because I do not view the world like that. I am not offended by diversity, though I am sometimes made uncomfortable by it, usually by my own exclusion. I think the world is impossible large by how many types of people it is made to connect

 

Impossible is my kind of challenge ;)


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The Life You Live is a CHOICE- I choose HAPPY :)

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Dakota35
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Posted on Sun, Feb 10, 2013 23:00

A few comments:  First, Americans have been brainwashed into believing the USA is the most wonderful country in the world and people are literally dying to get here.  In some cases, that is true (according to which countries we are talking about).  But I've known foreigners that hate living in American.  And there are beautiful and wonderful places around the world.  In fact America was not voted to be the happiest place on Earth to live...and isn't happiness the most important thing?  Secondly, money will not make anyone happy...that is FACT.  Thirdly, If a man places his business over meeting a beautiful woman, that he finds interesting, then he made a mistake.  I made this mistake not long ago, now I regret it...as she emailed and told me that she is now dating someone.  Lesson learned.



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