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Arizona53
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Posted on Wed, Feb 24, 2010 21:58

What are some of the excuses you have used to not follow your passion, or live your life the way you want to live it? Are you aware that you use them, do you pay any attention to them? Do you know how to change your thoughts to get rid of the excuses?

 

Any thoughts?

 



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Wed, Mar 03, 2010 09:01

Quoting shazbot82

My " excuses" for not doing as I wish have been based in my current economic state. There have been some road blocks I have not yet found a way to overcome and it hinders my success right now. BUT I keep searching and another " no" simply brings me close to the " ultimate yes" For many years I have done just as I wished and found that traveling overseas alone was the best thing I have ever done. You learn very quickly about humankind's innate traits such as kindness and how a genuine smile goes a long way. At times, I did not pursue a passion fully because I deemed the cost to be too high. I am a very good singer but did not go after a career in music because I dont like the the lack of privacy and the instability. I still sing often and really enjoy performing when I can.


Shaz, Economics, I get that one. I use it every time I think about getting my business idea started. I am reading this book so that I can overcome that....LOL! Seems that I've been doing it all wrong, and if I start all the rest will follow, the trick is to start, without using an excuse as to why I can't. I may need to read several more, just so that the theory imbeds itself in my brain....

 

Its funny I always told my kids that if they wanted to do something badly enough, they could do anything they wanted. I have not followed my own good advice. 

 

I'll forgive you not singing for the masses if you promise to sing for us in the Keys....



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Wed, Mar 03, 2010 08:52

Quoting chawita

I have used ALL of them, especially the last one. So what's the antidote?


The first step is being aware that you use the excuses, at the time you are using them, and then changing the negative to a positive or questioning the belief. IE. It will be difficult....how do you know before you start that it will be difficult? What in your past tells you that? How do you change that to...It will be easy....and what is wrong with believing it will be easy? Align your thoughts with the new belief.

 

One of my favorite quotes is "When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." This actually works for me and helps me get through some difficult times. So by changing your programming you help to get rid of the excuse. I call it the "line 'em all up and shoot 'em down" program, but then I live in Calgary which is really just full of cowboys....LOL!

 

 

 



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Tue, Mar 02, 2010 07:20

Quoting GentlyWoman

Me too.  Famous for inviting my own self. Yet totally incapable of golfing.  That's ok, right? If I bring good Napa wine and am a willing designated cart driver?



So here are the excuses I promised, all 18 of them:

1. It will be difficult

2. It will be risky

3. It will take a long time

4. There will be family drama

5. I don't deserve it

6. It's not my nature

7. I can't afford it

8. No one will help me

9. It has never happened before

10. I'm not strong enough

11. I'm not smart enough

12. I'm to old (or not old enough)

13. The rules won`t let me

14. It`s too big

15. I don`t have the energy

16. It`s my personal family history

17.  I`m too busy

18. I`m too scared

I dont`know about anyone else, but, I have used a lot of these at various times and some of them together. I think the biggest one has got to be the last one, fear.....



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Tue, Mar 02, 2010 07:14

Quoting GentlyWoman

Me too.  Famous for inviting my own self. Yet totally incapable of golfing.  That's ok, right? If I bring good Napa wine and am a willing designated cart driver?



Gently.....you are invited wherever I'm going, and you can drive the cart as long as you promise a good laugh (please see my golf blog)......LOL!



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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GentlyWoman
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Posted on Tue, Mar 02, 2010 02:22

Quoting chawita

Yup, you're invited :)


Me too.  Famous for inviting my own self. Yet totally incapable of golfing.  That's ok, right? If I bring good Napa wine and am a willing designated cart driver?



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shazbot82
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Posted on Mon, Mar 01, 2010 19:16

My " excuses" for not doing as I wish have been based in my current economic state. There have been some road blocks I have not yet found a way to overcome and it hinders my success right now. BUT I keep searching and another " no" simply brings me close to the " ultimate yes" For many years I have done just as I wished and found that traveling overseas alone was the best thing I have ever done. You learn very quickly about humankind's innate traits such as kindness and how a genuine smile goes a long way. At times, I did not pursue a passion fully because I deemed the cost to be too high. I am a very good singer but did not go after a career in music because I dont like the the lack of privacy and the instability. I still sing often and really enjoy performing when I can.


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Arizona53
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Posted on Mon, Mar 01, 2010 12:09

Quoting chawita

I've been reading books on the subject for a couple of years now, and always felt I was taking 1 step forward then 2 steps back. I've suffered from social anxiety (also known as shyness) my whole life and one way I (tried to) tackle it is by giving lectures to large groups of people. I'm still struggling with it but thanks to that approach I feel I'm doing much better. I know I should try this approach to every area of my life. These lists sound simple enough. I'm writing them as we speak. Will keep you posted.


Believe it or not Shyness is an excuse. According to the author of my book there are at minimum 18 excuses that people use to NOT do something. I will list them later as I have the book on my nightstand. Giving lectures is an excellent way to re-program your thinking.

 

Is that an invitation to golf in Curacao?....LOL!



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Mon, Mar 01, 2010 12:05

Quoting Star41354

I find it interesting that golf and excuses end up on the same blog. I've been golfing for a while and last summer took an old friend to introduce her to the game. All she did all day was complain and make excuses. I told her to chill, and that golf was a metaphor for life in that all of your wounds are self inflicted. I could tell she was a bit annoyed and she knows of my history with men. She told me I should take up Bridge and I asked her why? She said Bridge is a metaphor for relationships, if you don't have a good partner you better have a good hand. LOL ..touche'


LOL, I like this one.....I may have to use this!



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Sun, Feb 28, 2010 10:02

Quoting zzzoraya

..ahh yes..AZ..Its....stupid...I said : Destiny..and why? look...here we must to work hard, lot of times in a place or job we dont chose!!! I am an artist...and I can not work as an Artist in Colombia, cause here we must to have "an Important" last name to have success...then I decided to travel to USA, and work in NY with a gallery....then. ..the twin towers collapsed....then I needed to come back....and things like this....I try to change..I try to go..but...always I came back to my ..."destiny"..... ahhh..perhaps when I accepted my destiny....and when I finish my "search"...surelly things would be different.....who knows???? destiny??? naaaaaaaaa


Z, it sounds to me that things in Colombia could use some changes, some changes that could help the common people to achieve more and do what they would like to do instead of something they don't choose. If you feel your destiny truly is to be there, then choose your own path.

It also sounds like it would be a very difficult job, not easy at all, but, subtle, little, baby steps is always a good way to start, and the benefits would be felt by generations to come. I am sure there are many people there who feel the same way you do, you would never be alone. The decision in my view is: Is the risk of beginning change worth the rewards that can and will be felt by so many.....?



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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zzzoraya
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Posted on Sat, Feb 27, 2010 14:10

..ahh yes..AZ..Its....stupid...I said : Destiny..and why? look...here we must to work hard, lot of times in a place or job we dont chose!!! I am an artist...and I can not work as an Artist in Colombia, cause here we must to have "an Important" last name to have success...then I decided to travel to USA, and work in NY with a gallery....then. ..the twin towers collapsed....then I needed to come back....and things like this....I try to change..I try to go..but...always I came back to my ..."destiny"..... ahhh..perhaps when I accepted my destiny....and when I finish my "search"...surelly things would be different.....who knows???? destiny??? naaaaaaaaa


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GentlyWoman
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Posted on Sat, Feb 27, 2010 13:54

Quoting chawita

I love this approach! I'll have to give it a shot.

Seriously! If you do, I'd love to hear how it makes you feel. There was this lady I read about who became a trapeze artist just because she set out to tackle her fear of heights.  I think that's what happens when you break your climb into a step at a time. Like you just said, AZ. Begin.  Sometimes that's the hardest part.



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Arizona53
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Posted on Sat, Feb 27, 2010 01:42

Quoting zzzoraya

...ummmmmmmmmm....."destiny"...."All is cause destiny"..bad excuse....and difficult answer...


Z, are you saying that you believe that destiny is an excuse?

 

I agree with this in that some people will say, that destiny controls us. I believe you can and do change your destiny on a daily basis. Some people believe their programming is set, because of the things they were taught as children, young adults, and so on. So, if you don't like the way your life is going, change the programming, change your thoughts, change your life. If you begin the change, you change your destiny.

 

I don't mean to make it sound simplistic, it is difficult to do, but it can be done!

 

 



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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zzzoraya
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Posted on Fri, Feb 26, 2010 15:41

...ummmmmmmmmm....."destiny"...."All is cause destiny"..bad excuse....and difficult answer...


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Arizona53
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Posted on Fri, Feb 26, 2010 10:20

Quoting chawita

I love this approach! I'll have to give it a shot.


Chawita, I agree, I love the list thing, and it certainly keeps you reminded of all of the possibilities in life, and how much happier you can be! Let us know how it works out!



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Fri, Feb 26, 2010 08:24

Quoting GentlyWoman

Come here! I'll bring some Napa Valley grape juice :)



OK, that tears it....Golf in CA!....LOL



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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GentlyWoman
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Posted on Thu, Feb 25, 2010 22:11

Quoting Arizona53

I`m gonna have to go on tour and check all of these places out.....LMAO!



Come here! I'll bring some Napa Valley grape juice :)



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GentlyWoman
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Posted on Thu, Feb 25, 2010 22:05

Quoting niceguylooking

Courtney   Blah Blah Blah !  LOL Thats what they all say until they come to the great state of Michigan and play Northern Michigan Golf,,, best there is,, period !  LOL

 

Eva,,, Ca,, N.E.C.



Not Close? Ask forgiveness from Godgle. You'll find that MI isn't even on the first page.

Courtney, did you look at one of the main reasons CA voters rebelled against Supreme Court's overturn to sanction gay marriage? It wasn't just bigotry - we're known for being THE most liberal state.  It was foul play. I have a right to vote. For my vote to count. If the Supreme Court judicially overrules my vote, why vote?

Eva



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Arizona53
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Posted on Thu, Feb 25, 2010 21:55

Quoting niceguylooking

Courtney   Blah Blah Blah !  LOL Thats what they all say until they come to the great state of Michigan and play Northern Michigan Golf,,, best there is,, period !  LOL

 

Eva,,, Ca,, N.E.C.



I`m gonna have to go on tour and check all of these places out.....LMAO!



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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Arizona53
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Posted on Thu, Feb 25, 2010 21:53

Quoting CDinCO

Regarding excuses: ...Even here on the MM site. Let's bring this back into perspective... We may have our own opinions of what we deal with as individuals, and this blog may rub some people the wrong way but I will stand firm on my ground to state that if we do not fight for our rights, nor do we believe enough in ourselves and the protections we are afforded, how do we ever expect to passify or reverse the discriminatory behaviors many people bring up over and over again, whether here or in their "real" lives. If you feel you are unprotected, you likely are bringing it upon yourself by making it the forefront of WHO YOU ARE, not what you are allowed in our FREE society. Maybe by spelling out some of these allowances, you can reconsider your position / opinion and start working on change instead of holding on to morals and misconceptions that were legally eliminated in this country over 40 years ago and upheld in every instance presented to the Supreme Court of our country, whether gender-based or racially oriented. I, for one, am tired of the excuses everybody uses! If you don't like it, change it but don't impose your misconceptions and disbeliefs onto those of us who have worked hard to uphold our rights as a human being in this country because you don't feel you're being treated fairly. Yes, I'm white, but I'm also a female and I have many "minority" friends who never pull the race or gender or gay card. We live life freely and as we are allowed to within the limitations of our Constitution. ...Even here on the MM site. Let's bring this back into perspective... We may have our own opinions of what we deal with as individuals, and this blog may rub some people the wrong way but I will stand firm on my ground to state that if we do not fight for our rights, nor do we believe enough in ourselves and the protections we are afforded, how do we ever expect to passify or reverse the discriminatory behaviors many people bring up over and over again, whether here or in their "real" lives. If you feel you are unprotected, you likely are bringing it upon yourself by making it the forefront of WHO YOU ARE, not what you are allowed in our FREE society. Maybe by spelling out some of these allowances, you can reconsider your position / opinion and start working on change instead of holding on to morals and misconceptions that were legally eliminated in this country over 40 years ago and upheld in every instance presented to the Supreme Court of our country, whether gender-based or racially oriented. I, for one, am tired of the excuses everybody uses! If you don't like it, change it but don't impose your misconceptions and disbeliefs onto those of us who have worked hard to uphold our rights as a human being in this country because you don't feel you're being treated fairly. Yes, I'm white, but I'm also a female and I have many "minority" friends who never pull the race or gender or gay card. We live life freely and as we are allowed to within the limitations of our Constitution.


This is one of those moments when I am speechless. Interesting points though, and while I see what your direction is, we were kinda talking about making excuses about your own life and how you live it.... and in light of that I am a bit confused by the topic of your comment.



"The best way to predict the future....Is to create it."

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