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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Thu, Dec 11, 2008 00:08

Well. Heres the thing. We are looking at on line relationships, long distance, so lets talk about Fidelity. Online theres so much more easily available candy in the shop isnt there. I mean its not like you have to go to a bar or club or a singles venue to meet. Online its all there at the click of a mouse isnt it. We are faced in online relationships at least in the beginning with limited time together so answer me this. Is it right bloggers, that if you are in a committed relationship , well, as committed as it can be, that your mate actively corresponds with other women or men online? Is it right to have more than one ball in the air at any one time? Is there an etiquette to these situations? Is it acceptable for your mate not only to still correspond with other women but to also divulge details about your situation, lifestyle and personal life?? I dont think so bloggers I dont think so. Should you immediately cease correspondance with other women,or men as the case may be, or at least advising them you have found real love or that you are to be married, or do you keep it a little secret and continue ?So continuing the virtual life you have created. Lets face it, it can be very exciting talking to many on here and flattering too. Please ladies and gents i would welcome your input because obviously this goes both ways. If the answer is NO absolutely not, what then do we think of people who do this?


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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Fri, Dec 19, 2008 00:45

i absolutely agree with you Brian. I would never expect my partner to give up his friends of either sex but theres a difference between being friends and romancing. I believe you can only profess love to one person at a time. It is for me a special thing between two people not one to be shared by many


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Posted on Thu, Dec 18, 2008 23:09

I think for me it's an issue of ethics. That is a great big grey area. What's right for one is wrong for another. The remedy would be open and honest communication and mutual agreement on expectations. I certainly would never expect my female partner to give up all of her male friends. I even think it would be ok for her to flirt occassionally in a playful of joking way. What matters to me is who she comes home to at the end of the day. I've noticed that most women are monogamous. It's interesting and thank you for writing the blog.


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wwww12345
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Posted on Mon, Dec 15, 2008 16:03

Quoting Tinkerbelle: yeah but do we have to wear our short nurses uniforms??

No it does not have to be a nurses uniform. Anything short will do. lololol


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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Sun, Dec 14, 2008 04:22

Quoting wwww12345: No, to take turns rocking me in my rocking chair and reading to me. lololol

yeah but do we have to wear our short nurses uniforms??


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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Sun, Dec 14, 2008 01:00

Queen I think it must be both Fury with ones self for having been so stupid, humiliating for the fact that in time these things become public and sad because the dream wasnt real


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Queenofyourdreams
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Posted on Sat, Dec 13, 2008 17:45

Quoting Tinkerbelle: Queen you make some interesting and valid points here. On the outside what you say is crystal clear and correct, on the inside I suspect that when one is involved romantically with such a person one is perhaps so focussed on the dream one loses sight of what is happening. Its only later and with hindsight that the signs are seen and recognised. Lets face it. We all want the dream dont we ? thats why we are on here, and in the heat of the moment we see what we choose to see, until we can evade the truth no longer, and when that day comes, it must be truly dreadful

Yes, Tinker. When we see the truth in what someone has led us to believe in affairs of the heart, or in how they have presented themselves here...it can be a shock. How many times have we seen this happen here on the blogs? Men and women pretending that they are someone, that they are not. It seems that this on line dating does allow some of those "who walk among us" (hidden or otherwise) to create a reality about them that is not based in truth. They create webs of deceit that we are unable to see, until someone points them out, or we (or someone else) meets them, and the truth finally does show itself. As most of us learn, these scammers and cons come in all shapes and sizes and they are often very good at what they do. Until this happens to a person, especially when it comes to matters of the heart, many do not understand how this can happen. As you say, in the heat of the moment of a dream, it is hard to separate the reality from the fantasy. We want it to be real. I am not sure if this is because we feel we have disappointed ourselves, or if it is the realization that the dream never really was true. But, the good news is that once we are burned, we will probably not be again. What is that saying? Beware of wolves in sheep's clothing...


People may not remember what you say or do, but they will remember how you made them feel.

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wwww12345
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Posted on Fri, Dec 12, 2008 23:56

Quoting RubieGirl: 2- for holding hands and the Third for Opening doors ???

No, to take turns rocking me in my rocking chair and reading to me. lololol


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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Fri, Dec 12, 2008 01:19

Quoting wwww12345: They are just trying to line up a innocent threesome,, why are you so jealous?? lololololololol

4 Ws thats because we dont want to share you lol


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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Fri, Dec 12, 2008 01:18

Queen you make some interesting and valid points here. On the outside what you say is crystal clear and correct, on the inside I suspect that when one is involved romantically with such a person one is perhaps so focussed on the dream one loses sight of what is happening. Its only later and with hindsight that the signs are seen and recognised. Lets face it. We all want the dream dont we ? thats why we are on here, and in the heat of the moment we see what we choose to see, until we can evade the truth no longer, and when that day comes, it must be truly dreadful


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Tinkerbelle
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Posted on Fri, Dec 12, 2008 01:12

Trish Thanks for jumping in. I wholeheartedly agree with you. Of course friendships with the opposite sex are allowed but theres a difference between that and a communication which is shall we say more romantic in nature, and thats what i was talking about. There have to be lines drawn in the sand. They may not profess their love for others they may not invite them to their home or on vacations. They may not be intimate. Its all about respecting your partner at the end of the day. I met someone on here and the first thing i did was to tell the people i was talking to that i had met someone. He did not do the same. I am friends to this day with those i was in touch with. Just friends and he knew who my friends were


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Queenofyourdreams
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Posted on Thu, Dec 11, 2008 16:59

Tinker. You have stated many truths. On line dating is not as easy to understand as we would hope it would be. The facts are simple. If the man continues talking to other women...he is not really devoted to you. The same goes for women. We have seen this over and over here in blogland. We have also all seen those cons who come here. Secretly telling each woman/man that they are the one. While they continue sending love messages to others. It is the same rules as with any con or scammer. If you feel they are not being faithful to you, even if you have met them, they probably are not. If they ask you to marry them to soon, it is not real. If they ask you for money, RUN. Once they have us convinced that WE are in love with them they can do anything they want to, and we will believe them, as is our nature. The question is when can we drop that fantasy and see the reality by all the signs that we can see, but choose to ignore..... Many of us are very strong in our personal lives. We wear our armour well. However, the fantasy of an on line relationship (again, even if we meet them them a few times) can confuse us to where we do not believe what we are feeling and know...until it is over and we can look back and say, "I saw all the signs..."

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People may not remember what you say or do, but they will remember how you made them feel.

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wwww12345
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Posted on Thu, Dec 11, 2008 11:51

They are just trying to line up a innocent threesome,, why are you so jealous?? lololololololol


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