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AsianAura
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Posted on Mon, Jun 23, 2008 15:10

Summer Classes for Men at : THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Friday, June 29, 2008 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM CLASS 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM . CLASS 2 The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. CLASS 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, W alls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. CLASS 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.. CLASS 5 Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM CLASS 6 Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM CLASS 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum Monday at 8:00 PM , 2 hours. CLASS 8 Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. CLASS 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined CLASS 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. CLASS 11 Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing Tuesdays at 7:00 PM , location to be determined CLASS 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM . CLASS 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. CLASS 14 The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM , location to be determined. Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.


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robtest
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Posted on Wed, Jun 25, 2008 07:30

Quoting AsianAura: Rob, how about this one? ...... The Good Wife's Guide. You'll have to enlarge it to read it.

LOL, that was the one from 1955 in good housekeeping magazine? Snopes says that it is a fake and urban legend. Seems like someone from the present was making fun of the past. My favorite from the list was "Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. " Evidently, watching lesbians was a male fantasy way back !!! I wonder when the term "gay" actually started to mean homosexual ??? Not that there is anything wrong with it, as Jerry Seinfeld would say!


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AsianAura
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 17:44

Rob, how about this one? ...... The Good Wife's Guide. You'll have to enlarge it to read it.


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robtest
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 14:58

Classes for Women: Class 1 - Keeping His Mr. Happy Happy: learn the finer points of improving your sex life by improving his. Class 2 - Cold Beer Basics: when that 12 pack is down to the last 2, it is time to head to the store. Class 3 - Bathroom Ergonomics: if the seat was up when you found it, why can't you leave it that way when you are done. Class 4 - Physics Space and Time: Understanding how Boys Nite Out is a needed break for him and a good excuse for Girls Nite Out for you. Class 5 - Spontaneity - A party that lasts for 2 hours shouldn't require 3 hours of primping. Less is better with your man on the go. Class 6 - Sexual Coercion - Learn how to stop nagging your man to get things done and how to entice him using sex appeal.


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billzeke
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 09:58

Quoting optimyst: To assist in Lesson 3 the Dutch have produced something to give the gentleman an Look carefully and you will see the fly is actually etched into the porccelain. It is reported to have reduced spillage by around 80%

LOL....Looks like I have been hitting the wrong fly all this time... Good thing I took a class..


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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 09:43

To assist in Lesson 3 the Dutch have produced something to give the gentleman an Look carefully and you will see the fly is actually etched into the porccelain. It is reported to have reduced spillage by around 80%


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wwww12345
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 08:28

I don't recommend learning any of these things. Lets face it, women have to have something to bit*ch about or they will explode, and if you give them a few minor things to be upset over they won't be so upset about your stripper mistress coming over for the weekend.


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AsianAura
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 06:50

Quoting billzeke: Oh!!!! BTW. I almost forgot. This is our curriculum 1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT, FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART. 2. FORM A LOOSE GRIP. 3. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN! 4. AVOID A QUICK BACK SWING. 5. STAY OUT OF THE WATER. 6. TRY NOT TO HIT ANYONE. 7. IF YOU ARE TAKING TOO LONG, LET OTHERS GO AHEAD OF YOU. 8. DON'T STAND DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF OTHERS. 9. QUIET PLEASE...WHILE OTHERS ARE PREPARING. 10. DON'T TAKE EXTRA STROKES.

Bill, I guess once you've mastered the art of urinating, you'll also be able to play golf! LOL!


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billzeke
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 06:34

Quoting billzeke: RE: CLASS 3.... Me and a bunch of other guys are already taking that class. No one has hit urinal so far but it's only our 1st week.....lolol

Oh!!!! BTW. I almost forgot. This is our curriculum 1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT, FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART. 2. FORM A LOOSE GRIP. 3. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN! 4. AVOID A QUICK BACK SWING. 5. STAY OUT OF THE WATER. 6. TRY NOT TO HIT ANYONE. 7. IF YOU ARE TAKING TOO LONG, LET OTHERS GO AHEAD OF YOU. 8. DON'T STAND DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF OTHERS. 9. QUIET PLEASE...WHILE OTHERS ARE PREPARING. 10. DON'T TAKE EXTRA STROKES.


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billzeke
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 06:25

RE: CLASS 3.... Me and a bunch of other guys are already taking that class. No one has hit urinal so far but it's only our 1st week.....lolol

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shazbot82
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 06:02

there is more content to this material. I have the same post on file somwhere but with fulltext,as forwarded to me from a friend who was at a UN summit when a female collaegue gave it to him. The whole thing is hilarious


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AsianAura
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 03:49

Saint, Yeah....you definitely have to teach boys while they're still young.


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AsianAura
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 03:35

Of all people, Healey and Trey should sign up for these classes. They need all the help they can get.

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Queenofyourdreams
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 03:27

Asian! Good to see you back! I think that you have the right idea with these classes. I see that you already have some of the best men from the blogs signing up.... Saint, those photos are very funny. Bill, I bet you could teach some of those classes.

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People may not remember what you say or do, but they will remember how you made them feel.

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billzeke
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Posted on Tue, Jun 24, 2008 01:09

In the end you want to learn as little as possible. That way you won't forget much!!!!


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The_Saint
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Posted on Mon, Jun 23, 2008 21:08

First and foremost. You have to teach young men where everything is.

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The_Saint
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Posted on Mon, Jun 23, 2008 21:05

Don't forget the computer training.

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The_Saint
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Posted on Mon, Jun 23, 2008 21:04

Here's another you have to teach young men.

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The_Saint
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Posted on Mon, Jun 23, 2008 21:02

You forgot this one. Ya got to train young men.

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