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whisperinocean
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Posted on Tue, Oct 02, 2007 05:32

Without going into much detail and theatrics this is my experience. I'm angry and annoyed right now, but do say that I don't judge all men to be the same. Just seems like a'holes come my way. A guy approached me a couple of months ago and insisted on seeing me when I said I am not in the mood, tired and want to relax. He insisted and said he had to see me, so I agreed to see him. He was upfront that he had an ex and that they split, but (I can hear some of you sigh) living there still because he pays rent and they said they are friends until he finds another place. The gist is. He dated me, but then he was unsure about his future and then he was not over his ex. I told him to take a hike two weeks ago. On Sunday he shows up as if things will be okay between us and he wants me. Digging up all the feelings and hurting me so bad. We spent the entire day talking and sharing. He cried so much and so did I. Yesterday he delivers the punchline of going back to his ex. What a bastard!!!He still had the audacity to judge one of my male friends after he saw a picture of us (group photo) on my laptop. I then found out in the phone conversation that he contemplated marriage to the ex just before he met me. In this all while crying, he said he never wanted to hurt me and that it hurts him to have hurt me. BS!!! Well bottomline is: I told him that it was like my best friend betrayed me and that as far as he is concerned, I'm dead. I don't want him in my life ever.


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whisperinocean
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Posted on Mon, Oct 08, 2007 02:35

Yes, that is a good motto. It is about moving on.


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Posted on Sat, Oct 06, 2007 07:51

Sandra...that's what my mom always says. "If he makes you cry more than he makes you laugh, he's not the right one!" Life is too short. Good advice!


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nautigal48
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Posted on Fri, Oct 05, 2007 19:48

Just heard this one recently: No man is worth crying over. The one who is, won't make you cry.


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Posted on Fri, Oct 05, 2007 13:55

WO, I'm so sorry you are going through this! SUCKS!! Lilyonthemountain...THANK YOU!! I needed this today so I can say I'M GRATEFUL!!! THANK YOU LORD! his rejection was your protection for me...and how gently and miraculously you revealed it to me.


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whisperinocean
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Posted on Thu, Oct 04, 2007 23:27

Hey PM, I just think he was selfish and still a bastard, knowing from the first time how I felt and that it could not repeat the same pattern, but he did it anyway. Thanks for your words and it helps. It is what makes us stronger and wiser. I won't fall for the same trick again. Hope you are well and thanks for the chat earlier on.


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whisperinocean
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Posted on Thu, Oct 04, 2007 22:07

Imago, absolutely, I am going through the process, but I am not going to sit in the ashes and mope. That is a good take on the pre marriage divorces. That is something I will take with me to encourage others who may find themselves in my position. Hi Jody, having you guys encouraging also helps alot. The future can only be bright with the odd thunder cloud. It is a choice and I am not a quitter. Cassie, he had his second chance and I will not let him back in my life on any terms. Nice thing about a call is, you can ignore it. :) We may run into each other due to business, but I will treat him like he is invisible. I told him to stay out of my life.My best friend maintains like you he is going to call again. Maybe as a man Imago can answer. Why do guys still go back to a woman if they have someone else they're suppose to be linked to. What more business; despite me telling him to take a hike for the second time would he want to contact me again?


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LILLYINMOUNTAIN
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Posted on Thu, Oct 04, 2007 21:43

I just wanted to add to everyone else's words of encouragement.....move forward and consider this a huge blessing....I just heard a great saying...... "Our rejections are God's protection"......I tell myself that often and remember the "right" one is out there and just stay strong and patient.....the wait is worth it.....Figs


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uptowngirl76
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Posted on Thu, Oct 04, 2007 13:48

Whisper, GOOD! I am glad you are feeling better. Good luck to you in the future. Jody


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whisperinocean
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Posted on Wed, Oct 03, 2007 21:49

UTG, thanks. I realised in this time just how great friends are and how they carry you through. I also know here I will get some good advice and insight. In retrospect, I calmly thought things through and am feeling better. It is a constant speaking to myself and seeing a future I deserve. This however, made me wiser. Shaz, exactly, but this one duped me. I am as adamant in not getting involved with someone who is separated or has just broken up. He said it was over which looked like it too in the amount of time he spent with me. Now when the word ex comes up, I'm not sticking around. MG, yes it sucks, but I am getting out of it. I am not going to stick around in the blues or feeling this way. I want to move on and put this down to experience and something I've learnt. We all deserve better and you are a great bunch of gals. Have a super day.


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MountainWinds
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Posted on Wed, Oct 03, 2007 12:46

I agree with blue...but you know, it just sucks anyway and I'm sorry that you had to go through that!


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shazbot82
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Posted on Wed, Oct 03, 2007 10:20

that is the exact reason why I will never go out with a seperated or involved man. Im sorry you had to endure that.Stay strong and dont let him drag you into his quagmire again. Sending you a heart-protector bubble,( as orginated by QueenofYourDreams) DRC


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uptowngirl76
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Posted on Wed, Oct 03, 2007 09:06

Whisper, I am so sorry. He is an A**! You deserve much better and someday you will find what you are looking for. Just know I am thinking of you in hopes you will feel better soon! UTG


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whisperinocean
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Posted on Wed, Oct 03, 2007 05:21

Hi Blue, Yes it is and one of my rally friends said this guy was looking to have his bread butter on both sides and that I deserve so much better. That is what makes friends so special. They know what to say and cheer you up when needed. What was worse is he insulted a guy who I feel a great deal for. Who despite any opportunity treated me like a lady and very special. That was a case of the kettle calling the pot black. I did tell him that he is the last one to judge. Look at what he is doing?


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