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HOLIDAYS ALONE...A FEW OBSERVATIONS Sort by:
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SCORPIOBEAUTIE
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 06:24

It saddened me as I read Katiegirl's blog on being alone at Christmas and missing buying gifts for her man. MANY women echoed the same sentiments about this time of year on Katie's blog. One WONDERFUL,BEAUTIFUL woman is even leaving the blogs because she can't find a man and has "given up on it." I'm wondering...Would be ever hear these sentiments expressed by men? I wonder what the MEN'S reaction would be to this same situation that Katie posed in her blog. I noticed only ONE man responded to the blog and did mention the fact that he spent New Year's alone (but negated his lonliness by saying he had LOTS of invites.) Does the holiday lonliness affect men in the same way? If so, why do they NOT voice their feelings in much the same way we women do? I don't think I'd ever hear a man at the department store women's clothing section say: "God, that red dress looks FABULOUS..I wonder where my love, my woman is. I'd sure like to see her in THAT!??!! Is this a not a "man thing" to do? Does their pride get in the way? Do they "distract" by hanging with their buddies, family, etc.to "numb" the pain of "aloneness"? Do they DENY same lonliness that we women experience to avoid the pain of it? Do we women just "experience" it(pretend shopping for them, pretend baking, etc.) as part of the process of healing and "moving on" in life? I'd like to hear from more of the "sensitive" types here like Michael (by the way your "proposal" won you lots of points from the gals as the blog would indicate!) and Zack and perhaps Newman on the subject of aloneness at holiday time and how you dealt with it. Men's opinions please? Inquiring minds want to know...truly!


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LatinPrincess4U
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Posted on Fri, Dec 22, 2006 20:53

SCORPIOBEAUTIE, is that not the "username" that made a very friendly remark on my "why do us women look at other women's profile"????..Sweetheart you should live up to your "username", what was that again???, Oh yes MsCongeniality2006, right??, again live up to it sugar!!,KARINA


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SCORPIOBEAUTIE
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Posted on Fri, Dec 22, 2006 05:52

NEWMAN thanks for your input. Glad my blog made you think! No one else echoed PITY PARTY but one catty female. All seemed to appreciate and CONTRIBUTED positively.


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SCORPIOBEAUTIE
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 21:13

THANKYOU ALL SOOO MUCH for your wonderful contributions to my blog!!! Michael, you WERE a help. S.Starr...insightful as always... Zack, you are wonderful, a girl could fall for you and i think Genie is(?!?) Dare i suggest?? :0 Sometimes someone else's grief/hardship can touch your heart and put your life's problems is perspective. For example: (short story version:) Tonite my son had a formal dinner/dance and I had no clue how to tie his tie (can you believe this?) so... ran across street to hit up my bachelor neighbor to help me out with the tie. He looked TERRIBLE. He looked like he had been drinking all weekend and maybe so, dunno, but he admitted to me that he had been crying all weekend and I was stunned to learn that someone had actually POISONED HIS DOG (had autopsy and vet said something like rat poison or antifreeze was ingested!! :0 )POOR MAN!!!!!! Needless to say,he was a WRECK, had been crying all weekend. Made me realize that I am not the only one with lonliness or problems. That man lost his best friend and faithful, loving companion that he had enjoyed and loved for some 7 years. That prompted me to do something nice for him, I mean this to me is the REAL meaning of Christmas; reaching out to those in need, lonely or hurting. I promptly went home and baked him a batch of cookies and plan to take it over tomorrow morning. Now, this act of kindness won't bring back his best friend or lessen his sadness any but hopefully, it will bring a small smile to his face. He helped me to realize the problems of others and not to focus on MY OWN SELFISH problems. Darn...I guess I had a lifechanging "grinchly" "epihany" tonite! Perhaps THAT is the true meaning of Christmas!!!??


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Boopster2000
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 13:51

Joe and Zack, My hat is off to both of you guys for sharing. I know that you aren't the only two who feel like that. The good thing is that we women like men who have a sensitive side and can share their feelings, I see many winks in your near future.


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sepelo7
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 12:54

the closest I can get to being sentimental is agreeing with mysticbuzz here. But I've always been single at the holidays so I am kind of used to it :D


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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 11:46

From listening, I've learned that men & women share the exact same feelings and fears. The difference lies in the sharing of those feelings and fears. Men require a level of trust; whereas women are more open...we almost have a 'need' to share our feelings with others...for moral support? affirmation? advice? all of the above? In men, it is an innate quality. Something we women need to understand and accept. We can't change it. So when we have a special man in our lives, that's when we have the opportunity to nourish that trust, so they will confide in us...not the World. :-)


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knuckles4
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 10:02

Of course men are lonely at this time of year.. We want the same things women want. The way a woman decorates the house, tree, the way the house smells after all the ornaments and preparations are out. Of course us men help with the tssk of getting ready, it's a lot of fun. A nice bottle of wine when putting up the tree with your "Sweetie" is "priceless". Then just snuggling with just the Christmas lights on... Or waiting for her to get ready for a night out... shouldn't expand on that in this forum... it can get personal... Ladies, we do miss those special times.. Joe


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MissSantaClaus
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 09:47

Zack Has Santa failed to mention what a fine fellow he thinks you are? The old B & W version is my favorite also. Merry Christmas to you, I can't imagine that you won't find the woman of your dreams soon ;) HO HO HO


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crazybeautiful2000
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 09:13

Scorpio, great blog. Zach, it is nice to know that the gents out there also have similar feelings. I feel your pain. Both my parents are dead, my brother and sister have their own families, and I have no children. So I have been alone since my divorce 5 years ago. I wake up to an empty house on Christmas morning. And dang it all, Santa seems to skip my house every year, so no presents to open. I go to church alone, and watch all the happy families, some already in their new Christmas finery. But I do feel a sense of belonging and entitlement, as I sing my heart out in all the joyous songs. A sense of peace will come over me, and I think how lucky I am, compared to some people. I do enjoy my own company, and have my two best pals at my feet every day, so it's not all bad. One day, my prince will come, and he will be loved more than he ever imagined. Don't ever give up hope. It's what keeps us all going.


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MissSantaClaus
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 07:42

Scorpiobeautie, Santa hasn't seen your beautiful face in a while. It gladdens my heart to hear from you. As the very wise and beautiful Santa #1 told a friend of mine. Light the tree, turn on the Christmas music, pour yourself a little libation and settle in for a long winters night. I'll be thinking of you. HO HO HO Santa


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southernstarr2006
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 07:31

Hi SB... First of all I have to say you are so pretty and have so much to offer.....it amazes me why so many beautiful ..sweet..precious women are still on here.... And yes you are correct in your assumptions some men do go through a really rough time during the holidays...oh my gosh do they ever...I have many friends that share their feelings and thoughts with me...and it is sad...some have memories of the past ..family ..children...that they pine and long for...lost loves...no family left..or what is left may not be healthy.....they become reflective about life in general...they may even suffer more than women...women seem to know how to cope with loneliness or at least we do a better job of it than the men do it....some men just can't cope or don't know how to and they internalize it all becoming very depressed...some try to get through it by escaping with a woman they don't really care about..anyone will do...some just choose to ignore Christmas all together...some try to get invited to the festivities....some may drink their way through the holidays...some may just choose to be alone...my experience is that it is all very sad...first of all because they are men..and they may not want anyone to know their heartache ..there disappointments...their suffering ...they feel they need to keep that eternal mask on..." the " I am a man mask " . This time of year is very special..it is a time to reach out..a time for love...we all want that special love in our lives...it is sad we all can' t all have and enjoy this gift.. Perhaps if we would just reach out to one another and communicate what is really in our hearts ..perhaps life would be richer for all of us...if there is no communication there is no bond...if there is no bond there is no friendship...if there is no friendship there is no love..... Merry Christmas Erica Anne@]--------- Erica @)----------


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SCORPIOBEAUTIE
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Posted on Sun, Dec 17, 2006 06:28

Markey, thanks for your blog. You rock! Happy Holidays to you!!!


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