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total posts: 113
Blog title: My blog
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Woman, 38
on 12/15/16
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on 04/04/16
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on 12/04/14
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on 10/02/13
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on 07/27/13
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on 04/08/13

Sexy Norwegins and one Asian Posted on Sat, Mar 10, 2007 19:49
Opps forgot to tell you they where Norwegian Trolls!! LOL except for the Asian she wore that outfit of her own free will.
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Pepper Orgasm Posted on Sat, Mar 10, 2007 19:37
A man is sitting next to a woman on a jet which is getting ready to take off. Suddenly, the man sneezes. He unzips his pants and wipes the end of his penis off with his handkerchief. He zips up, and continues reading his magazine. The woman cannot believe what she just saw. Then he sneezes again, unzips, pulls out his penis and wipes it off with a handkerchief. The woman says, "Excuse me sir, but that is disgusting and rude, and if you do it again, I am going to call the flight attendant and have you removed from this plane. He says, "I am so sorry that I have offended you. I have this very rare, embarrassing physical handicap that causes me to have an orgasm every time I sneeze." The woman, disarmed by the man's honesty, and somewhat embarrassed by her own callousness, says, with sympathy, "Oh you poor man, what are you taking for it?" "Pepper," he answers.
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She-goat, Wolf and Cabbage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Posted on Wed, Mar 07, 2007 10:03
She-goat, Wolf and Cabbage A farmer is returning from market, where he bought a she-goat, a wolf and cabbage. On the way home he must cross a river. His boat is little, allowing him to take only one of the three things. He can't keep the she-goat and the cabbage together (because the she-goat would eat it), nor the she-goat with the wolf (because the she-goat would be eaten). How shall the farmer get everything on the other side (without any harm)? Tell me your theory and I will give you the answer in 24 hours, the clock is ticking...Tick tock, Tick tock.
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Cool Whip, things you may NEVER have wanted to know!! Posted on Wed, Mar 07, 2007 10:24
Shine your shoes. Use a tablespoon of Cool Whip on your leather shoes, and shine. Soothe sunburn pain. Spread Cool Whip on the sunburn, let sit for twenty minutes, then rinse clean with lukewarm water. Thaw frozen fish. Place the frozen fish in a pan and cover with Cool Whip. The desert topping eliminates the frozen taste, returning the fresh-caught flavor. Condition your hair. Apply one-half cup Cool Whip to dry hair once a week as a conditioner. Leave on for thirty minutes, then rinse a few times before shampooing thoroughly. Soothe the burn on the roof of your mouth from hot pizza. Fill your mouth with Cool Whip to coat the lesion. Clean plant leaves. Using a soft cloth, wipe Cool Whip on each leaf. Give yourself a moisturizing facial. Cool Whip helps moisten dry skin when applied as a face mask. Wait twenty minutes, then wash it off with warm water, followed by cold water. Lighten coffee. Use a tablespoon of Cool Whip as a substitute for milk or cream in a cup of coffee. Help heal a cold sore. Place a compress of Cool Whip on the cold sore to speed healing, then rinse with cool water. Remove make-up. Wet face with lukewarm water, spread a handful of Cool Whip on face, rinse clean with lukewarm water, and blot dry. Clean silver. Mix two cups Cool Whip, and one tablespoon Heinz White Vinegar or ReaLemon lemon juice. Let silver stand overnight in mixture, then rinse clean and dry thoroughly. Treat minor burns. Rub Cool Whip into the burn. Let it set for fifteen minutes, then wash off with cool water. Shave. Apply Cool Whip to wet skin as a substitute for shaving cream. Store leftovers. Use empty Cool Whip containers as a substitute for Tupperware. Mix paints. Use empty Cool Whip containers to mix and store paints. Store game pieces. Never lose dice, cards, playing pieces, and small toys again. Store crayons. Keep crayons in an empty Cool Whip container. Store screws, nuts, and bolts. Use empty Cool Whip canisters in the workshop to hold loose screws, bolts, nuts, nails, drill bits, and spare parts. Store crafts. Organize ribbons, beads, glues, strings in empty Cool Whip containers. Improve marital relations. Give new meaning to the phrase ?dessert topping.?
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The Bar !!! Posted on Sun, Mar 04, 2007 15:46
Deer hunters at the bar: One night during the local deer hunting season a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy country bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a deer hunter tumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, then try his keys in five different cars before he found his. He sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. All the other deer hunters left the bar and drove off. Finally he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.00. The puzzle officer demanded to know how that could be. The deer hunter replied, "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
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Love bite!!!!! Posted on Sun, Mar 04, 2007 07:40
Click on picture to enlarge, LOL.
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Romance? Posted on Sat, Mar 03, 2007 20:05
How do you as a MMer think of romance and what is romance in your eyes. We all perceive things in different ways and romance is a strong one that is always escaping our grasp. Describe your version of Romance.
Worst of Storm Still to Come!!! Posted on Fri, Mar 02, 2007 10:56
State highways and interstate highways in the southern portion of Minnesota remained closed this morning and Gov. Tim Pawlenty said government offices in 21 southern, southwestern and northeastern counties will be shut today. Employees in the metro area are to report to work today, but the governor urged supervisors to be flexible and allow those who can?t make it into work to take vacation or personal time off. More than 140 school districts canceled morning classes Thursday, with many more schools likely to be closed today. Pawlenty said he wouldn't order all state schools to close on Friday, leaving the decision to individual schools. Minneapolis and St. Paul public schools canceled classes today. By early afternoon Thursday, the Minnesota Department of Transportation closed Interstate 35 from Albert Lea to the Iowa border, and Interstate 90 from Albert Lea to the South Dakota border. They remained closed Friday morning. MnDOT districts in southwestern Minnesota closed all state highways Thursday afternoon. MnDOT pulled snowplows off the roads in seven western Minnesota counties because of strong winds and heavy snow, and more closures were expected. The governor signed an executive order Thursday for the National Guard to help out where needed. So far the guard has opened armories in Owatonna and Albert Lea to provide shelter for stranded motorists. ?The storm has caused some problems, but overall, things are going as well as they could? he said this morning on WCCO Radio. ?Overall, things are going as well as they could,? ' he said. Traffic on Twin Cities roadways is lighter than normal today, but that?s because many people simply have nowhere to go. Many businesses are closed today, including General Mills in Golden Valley. Others are starting shifts late today. Boston Scientific in Arden Hills, Medtronic in Fridley, Land-O-Lakes and Blue Cross in Eagan and the Internal Revenue Service Twin Cities office are opening two hours late. The Science Museum of Minnesota won?t open until 11 a.m. today and the American Swedish Institute won?t open at all. Hennepin County Libraries will open at noon today. Hundreds of public and private schools sent students and staff home early yesterday and are keeping them away today in the wake of a powerful late winter snowstorm that clobbered the state with 10 to 20 inches of snow. The forecast calls for 2 to 3 more inches of snow in the metro area during the day. The storm Thursday dumped about 11.3 inches of snow in Minneapolis as of 6 a.m., but Plymouth got 17 inches. > Many highways and schools remained closed throughout the state as winds blew the fresh snow, limiting visibility, pushing drifts over the roads and challenging the army of snow plows trying to clear the roadways. . About 400 flights were canceled at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport on Thursday. "I'll just pull an all-nighter,'' said Sean McGraw, a network administrator whose flight home to New York City on Thursday was canceled. He was hoping to find a hotel room but said he was ready to spend the night at the airport. The National Weather Service repeated its warning against driving, particularly in northern Minnesota where 40 mph to 50 mph wind gusts were making roads impassible and were expected to push the ice on Lake Superior into mounds 25 feet high along the shore. Last weekend, between 8 inches and 2 feet of snow fell over most parts of the state, leaving many snowplow crews wondering where they'd put all the new snow. Most events at the state boys' swimming and diving meet, scheduled to begin Thursday at the University of Minnesota Aquatic Center, were pushed back until Saturday. The Minnesota State High School League also postponed several playoff games for boys' hockey. Among deaths reported Thursday, two people were killed when their car overturned on a slick road in North Dakota, a woman died in a car crash in Wisconsin and one person died after shoveling snow in Nebraska. In Wisconsin, wet snow was blamed for the collapse of a section of supermarket roof Thursday in the Milwaukee suburb of Brookfield. Customers were inside the Pick 'n Save store at the time, but no one was injured. The storm was part of a larger line of thunderstorms and snowstorms that stretched from Minnesota to the Gulf Coast. Tornadoes killed people in Missouri, Georgia and Alabama, including at least eight at an Alabama high school, authorities said. To the east, classes at New York schools from Syracuse to Albany and north to the Adirondacks closed or started late Friday after a messy mix of snow, sleet and freezing rain coated parts of the region with ice.
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Ever Wonder? I mean really!!! Posted on Fri, Mar 02, 2007 11:19
...why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? ...why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? ...why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? ...why "abbreviated" is such a long word? ...why doctors call what they do "practice"? ...why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98? ...why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons? ...why the man who invests all your money is called a broker? ...why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food? ...who tastes dog food when it has a "new and improved" flavor? ...why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes? ...why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? ...why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box? ...why sheep don't shrink when it rains? ...why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together? ...if con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? ...why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
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Wine? What is your favorite??? Posted on Tue, Feb 27, 2007 08:04
I was reading some blogs and Wine was coming up in a few so I thought I would ask, what is your favorite and why?? Mine is: Duerkheimer Fronhof - Scheurebe Trockenbeerenauslese, From: Kurt-Darting Taste: Eiswein - Ice Wine Taste: Very Fruity/Sweet Color: White Food Choices: Desserts/Aperitif This ice wine is extremely sweet, with vivid fruit flavors and aromatic bouquets of apple blossoms and honeysuckles. A lively dessert wine that is easily savored with or without a dessert - trust me, you won't miss the dessert!
Ohh Lordy, the wolf is out!! Posted on Tue, Feb 27, 2007 07:42
Ohh Lordy, the wolf is out!!Leap Sheep!!
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Can you see the eyes rotating?????? Posted on Sat, Feb 24, 2007 17:47
Another Illusion, Can you see the eyes rotating. Click on the picture too enlarge it.
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You're An Idiot If... Posted on Fri, Feb 23, 2007 08:40
This was emailed too me had too share it, please do not be offened. I thought it was pretty funny. You're an idiot if... you throw away a donut because it had a hole in it You're an idiot if... you think manuel labor is the president of puerto rico You're an idiot if... you check your mail box in the front yard after your computer says " You've got mail." You're an idiot if... You have a strange desire to post a definition for no apparent reason...hmmmm You're an idiot if... Your computer came with a 40 ounce drink holder. You're an idiot if... You watch your collegue start up the new office PC and think the password is a row of asterii You're an idiot if... you move and take the numbers on your house because you dont want to change your address You're an idiot if... you drown in your car and its a convertible -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You're an idiot if... you get fired from a m&m factory for throwing out all the W's -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You're an idiot if... you take your radio with you on vacations so you can pick up your favorite station You're an idiot if... You try to send an instant message through your palm pilot using a conduit that doesn't support proxy servers and your IP adderss doesn't fit your 603MHz network processor which causes an internal application error in stack 102938bB2aAJksd due to an invalid registry entry in 0S/2 Warp while drinking your juice in the hood. You're an idiot if... Your village is looking for you... You're an idiot if... You went to the bookstore, searched for the perfect book you had wanted for so long.. DIDNT GET IT! because someone else told you to look for it online because it was probably less expensive and now you cant find it online and probably when u go to the bookstore you wont find it either! (because there was just one in the store) You're an idiot if... you stick your finger in your ear to scratch it and then smell your finger even though you know it will stink You're an idiot if... you waste time pondering potatoes and their significance in the universe You're an idiot if... you need glasses to find your glasses You're an idiot if... you thought the board of education was a piece of wood You're an idiot if... You want to connect your mother to the internet (you can't you need a computer) You're an idiot if... you use morse code with your classmates/coworkers to form an alliance of people who just like to swear in morse code at thier boss/teacher. You're an idiot if... Your name is Michael L. ,no wait that's too obvious. Let's say M. Leonard.
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EyeTease!!! Or Not??? Dare you too look...he Posted on Fri, Feb 23, 2007 08:28
Count the black dots.
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Is it moving and shimmering? Posted on Sat, Feb 17, 2007 18:48
Is it moving and shimmering? Look at this illusion for a while and it will appear to be shimmering and moving. Also: Follow the outermost groove and watch it change from a groove to a hump as you go around the wheel
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Americans get re-educated ... Posted on Mon, Feb 19, 2007 10:19
Meaning of Flag Draped Coffin All Americans should be given this lesson. Those who think that America is an arrogant nation should really reconsider that thought. Our founding fathers used GOD's word and teachings to establish our Great Nation and I think it's high time Americans get re-educated about this Nation's history. Pass it along and be proud of the country we live in and even more proud of those who serve to protect our "GOD GIVEN" rights and freedoms. I hope you take the time to read this..... To understand what the flag draped coffin really means..... Here is how to understand the flag that laid upon it and is surrendered to so many widows and widowers. Do you know that at military funerals, the 21-gun salute stands for the sum of the numbers in the year 1776? Have you ever noticed the honor guard pays meticulous attention to correctly folding the United States of America Flag 13 times? You probably thought it was to symbolize the original 13 colonies, but we learn something new every day! The 1st fold of the flag is a symbol of life. The 2nd fold is a symbol of the belief in eternal life. The 3rd fold is made in honor and remembrance of the veterans departing the ranks who gave a portion of their lives for the defense of the country to attain peace throughout the world. The 4th fold represents the weaker nature, for as American citizens trusting in God, it is to Him we turn in times of peace as well as in time of war for His divine guidance The 5th fold is a tribute to the country, for in the words of Stephen Decatur, "Our Country, in dealing with other countries, may she always be right; but it is still our country, right or wrong." The 6th fold is for where people's hearts lie. It is with their heart that They pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States Of America , and the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with Liberty and Justice for all. The 7th fold is a tribute to its Armed Forces, for it is through the Armed Forces that they protect their country and their flag against all her enemies, whether they be found within or without the boundaries of their republic. The 8th fold is a tribute to the one who entered into the valley of the shadow of death, that we might see the light of day. The 9th fold is a tribute to womanhood, and Mothers. For it has been through their faith, their love, loyalty and devotion that the character of the men and women who have made this country great has been molded. The 10th fold is a tribute to the father, for he, too, has given his sons and daughters for the defense of their country since they were first born. The 11th fold represents the lower portion of the seal of King David and King Solomon and glorifies in the Hebrews eyes, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. The 12th fold represents an emblem of eternity and glorifies, in the Christians eyes, God the Father, the Son and Holy Spirit. The 13th fold, or when the flag is completely folded, the stars are uppermost reminding them of their nations motto, "In God We Trust." After the flag is completely folded and tucked in, it takes on the appearance of a cocked hat, ever reminding us of the soldiers who served under General George Washington, and the Sailors and Marines who served under Captain John Paul Jones, who were followed by their comrades and shipmates in the Armed Forces of the United States, preserving for them the rights, privileges and freedoms they enjoy today. There are some traditions and ways of doing things that have deep meaning. In the future, you'll see flags folded and now you will know why. Share this with the children you love and all others who love what is referred to, the symbol of " Liberty and Freedom." MAYBE THE SUPREME COURT SHOULD READ THIS EXPLANATION BEFORE THEY RENDER THEIR DECISION ON THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE. FORWARD IT; MAYBE SOMEONE WITH THE NECESSARY POWER, OR POLITICAL AND FINANCIAL INFLUENCE, WILL GET IT TO THEM. IN THE MEANTIME, MAY GOD PROTECT US ALWAYS. ONE NATION, UNDER GOD, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL.
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Assistance>>>...... Posted on Mon, Feb 19, 2007 10:05
After numerous rounds of "We don't know if Osama is still alive", Osama himself decided to send Ted Kennedy a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Kennedy opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of coded message: 370HSSV-0773H. Kennedy was baffled, so he e-mailed it to John Kerry. Kerry and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. No one could solve it at the FBI so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA. With no clue as to its meaning, the FBI finally asked Marine Corps Intelligence for help. Within a minute the Marines cabled back with this reply: "Tell Kennedy he's holding the message upside down.
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the Pledge Posted on Sat, Feb 17, 2007 16:37
John McCain's remarks about the Pledge of Allegiance - In light of the recent appeals court ruling in California, with respect to the Pledge of Allegiance, the following recollection from Senator John McCain is very appropriate: "The Pledge of Allegiance" - by Senator John McCain As you may know, I spent five and one half years as a prisoner of war during the Vietnam War. In the early years of our imprisonment, the NVA kept us in solitary confinement or two or three to a cell. In 1971 the NVA moved us from these conditions of isolation into large rooms with as many as 30 to 40 men to a room. This was, as you can imagine, a wonderful change and was a direct result of the efforts of millions of Americans on behalf of a few hundred POWs 10,000 miles from home. One of the men who moved into my room was a young man named Mike Christian. Mike came from a small town near Selma, Alabama. He didn't wear a pair of shoes until he was 13 years old. At 17, he enlisted in the US Navy. He later earned a commission by going to Officer Training School then he became a Naval Flight Officer and was shot down and captured in 1967. Mike had a keen and deep appreciation of the opportunities this country and our military provide for people who want to work and want to succeed. As part of the change in treatment, the Vietnamese allowed some prisoners to receive packages from home. In some of these packages were handkerchiefs, scarves and other items of clothing. Mike got himself a bamboo needle. Over a period of a couple of months, he created an American flag and sewed on the inside of his shirt. Every afternoon, before we had a bowl of soup, we would hang Mike's shirt on the wall of the cell and say the Pledge of Allegiance. I know the Pledge of Allegiance may not seem the most important part of our day now, but I can assure you that in that stark cell it was indeed the most important and meaningful event. One day the Vietnamese searched our cell, as they did periodically, and discovered Mike's shirt with the flag sewn inside, and removed it. That evening they returned, opened the door of the cell, and for the benefit of all of us, beat Mike Christian severely for the next couple of hours. Then, they opened the door of the cell and threw him in. We cleaned him up as well as we could. The cell in which we lived had a concrete slab in the middle on which we slept four naked light bulbs hung in each corner of the room. As I said, we tried to clean up Mike as well as we could. After the excitement died down, I looked in the corner of the room, and sitting there beneath that dim light bulb with a piece of red cloth, another shirt and his bamboo needle, was my friend, Mike Christian. He was sitting there with his eyes almost shut from the beating he had received, making another American flag. He was not making the flag because it made Mike Christian feel better. He was making that flag because he knew how important it was to us to be able to Pledge our allegiance to our flag and country. So the next time you say the Pledge of Allegiance, you must never forget the sacrifice and courage that thousands of Americans have made to build our nation and promote freedom around the world. You must remember our duty, our honor, and our country "I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."
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Man VS Horse..........Read too understand lol Posted on Mon, Feb 12, 2007 19:11
GOOD THINGS ABOUT HUSBANDS: 1. Husbands are less expensive to shoe than horses. 2. Feeding a husband doesn't require anything that even mildly compares with the hassle of putting up hay. 3. A lame husband can still work. 4. A husband with a bellyache doesn't have to be walked. 5. Husbands don't try to scratch their heads on your back. 6. They are better able to understand puns. 7. If they are playing hard to catch, you **may** be able to run them down on foot. 8. They know their name. 9. They usually pay their own bills. 10. They apologize when they step on your toes. 11. No saddle fitting problems. 12. They seldom refuse to get into the vehicle. 13. They don't panic - running and yelling all through the house when you leave them alone (unless you've left the kids with them too!). 14. For a nominal fee, you can hire someone else to clip them. 15. They don't like the lady next door just as well as you, just because she fed him for 3 days straight. THE HORSE'S ADVANTAGE: 1. If they don't work out you can sell them. 2. They don't come complete with in-laws. 3. You don't have to worry about your children looking like them. 4. You never have to iron their saddle pads. 5. If you get too fat for one, you can shop for a bigger one. 6. They smell good when they sweat. 7. You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape. 8. It's possible to keep them from "jumping the fence" ... 9. You can force them to stay in good physical condition ... with a whip if necessary. 10. They don't want their turn at the computer. 11. They may turn white with age, but never go bald. 12. They have never heard of PMS. 13. They learn to accept restraint. 14. They don't care what you look like as long as you have a carrot or an apple.
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Parasailing Posted on Mon, Feb 12, 2007 14:10
It was at a beautiful, white sand beach here in Naples, listening to the soft background noise of the gently rolling waves. Beautiful bodies enjoying the warm sun, I had just finished my third beer and was dozing off in my lounger. Suddenly, a cloud appears, it made me realize that my tranquil peace was about to change!!! I looked up and HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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