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total posts: 188
Blog title: Views From The Frog Pond
Blog description:

Come here for some musings, insights jaded by my own biases and the occassional odd but sincere question.

My blog address: http://MillionaireMatch.com/blog/easymantolove
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Woman 44
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Soulmates and a love that last a lifetime 184 Views 09/02/14

Everything in these blogs seems to go in cycles... it's interesting... and lately there's a lot of posts about love that last a lifetime and soulmates.


I think this is dangerous... I always have.


There have been some recent studies published which show that couples who believe they've married their soulmates tend to have higher divorce rates.  The reason?  Since it's your soulmate you don't have to work as hard.


OTOH, people who don't believe they've married their soulmates tend to work harder and be more willing to resolve conflict... their marriages last the longest.


Then we have all the dreams of finding someone who will love us forever and whom we will love forever... and I think this comes without the understanding that forever love is built one moment at a time. It's loving someone in each moment and those moments become hours which become days which become years and those years add up to lifetimes.


No love starts off as a lifetime love... maybe its a goal but even then, goals needs steps to achievment and it doesn't seem like the dreamers understand the steps.


I'm a romantic by nature but even as a romantic I know that romantic relationships are built. Romance rarely falls from the sky and when it does, it doesn't last long.


Are we sure we're approaching the problem the right way?

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Buridan's Ass Paradox 261 Views 05/21/14

This paradox refers to a hypothetical situation wherein an ass that is equally hungry and thirsty is placed precisely midway between a stack of hay and a pail of water. Since the paradox assumes the ass will always go to whichever is closer, it will die of both hunger and thirst since it cannot make any rational decision to choose one over the other.


This paradox was applied to humans by 12th century Persian Islamic scholar and philosopher Al-Ghazali who discusses the application of this paradox to human decision making, asking whether it is possible to make a choice between equally good courses without grounds for preference.


Let's suppose we're confronted with a choice between two people and those two people are complete opposites and what one has, the other does not:


#1 Is everything we want: beauty, brains, personality, humor, health etc.


#2 Is everything we need: those attributes that allow us to grow as human beings, to mature, to achieve a level of happiness and inner peace only dreamed of


Al-Ghazali takes the attitude that free will can break the stalemate and that presented with two similar dates, man, who has a strong desire for them but who is unable to take them both, will take one of them, through a quality in him, the nature of which is to differentiate between two similar things and rationalize the greater benefit of one.


Since #1 would give you none of the things #2 would and #2 would have none of the qualities of #1, which would you chose and why? (or would you be unable to chose either and would therefore chose neither)


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A reality check may be in order 963 Views 09/23/12

The forums and blogs are filled with women complaining about men who try to trick them, cheat them, scam them, who're tired of kissing frogs, who're wondering where the "real men" are and who're certain there are no millionaires around to spoil them.


So, I think today I'm going to vent... and this is meant nicely...


There are liars and cheaters out there and neither sex has the market on who lies the most and studies have shown that just as many women cheat as do men. This site, by virtue of its name, attracts more than it’s share of liars and cheats so you should start off wary.  Remember: Where there's prey, there are predators.


If he seems too good to be true, he probably is. If he's twice as good looking as anyone you've ever dated... stop and think.  If he seems far more interested in what you have to say than any man has ever been before... stop and think.  If he's 20 years younger... stop and think.  If he lives 1000 miles away, do you really think you're that attractive and that interesting?  I'm not saying you're not but shouldn't it be a red flag?  After all, why would such a great catch need to look so far away from home?


If you're tired of kissing frogs and expecting a prince, go back to fairy tale school because only a princess can change a frog into a prince with a kiss.  If you're not a princess, you can kiss all the frogs you want and never get anything more than warts.


Every man is a "real man", it just takes a real woman to bring out his best. If you’re constantly looking for a “real man” you need to look inside… at your choices and how you treat men.


Women who talk about what wealthy men can do for them... who want a man who will "take me out and treat me like a lady/princess" etc. are immediate turnoffs and you may as well have posted a sign saying "I'm a target, abuse me!" because any man with $2 and 1/2 days experience knows that all he has to do is dangle the carrot/carat in front of your eyes and he can get whatever he wants.


For most wealthy men, women who want to be "spoiled" are a dime a dozen and if we wanted to spend that kind of "dime", we could get someone far younger and far more attractive... unless you just made yourself too easy to pass up.  However, most wealthy men didn't get wealthy by spending foolish dimes so most of what you get are those who either don’t have a dime or those who see no value in you.


Most wealthy people I know drive normal cars, live in normal houses and do normal things... they live far from glamorous lives and never appear on "lifestyles of the rich and famous".  Yeah, most eat at fancy restaurants, but not every night. Sometimes we do have social obligations that require you to dress nicely and behave acceptably and we need to know you won't be an embarrassment. If you're not willing and able to help "our" cause (the cause we've have spent a lifetime building and of which you are a part) then you're a burden we'd rather skip you and go it alone.


We are also smart enough to know that although we're secure today, we may be broke tomorrow or crippled or face some other horrible burden and if money/lifestyle etc. is what attracts you, then when we need you most is when you will be gone... that makes you a bad investment.


Want to know the real kicker?  When you blog about your horrible experiences, any men moderately interested in you would wonder what kind of a woman makes such bad choices.  Were you truly duped or do you have a pattern of bad choices?  Will you bring drama and discord to our lives or peace, love and happiness?  When you blog about your bad experiences, make sure it’s for personal growth and not about blaming men.


My advice: Stop blaming men and take responsibility for your own choices, stop looking at his wallet and look at his heart, be realistic about what you bring to the table and make a sincere effort to understand what he needs in his life and if you can fill that need without changing yourself, then do so.

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