I rarely get philisophical like this here, but here are points to ponder for those who are separated/in the process of divorce/married, but looking for something more or just plainly fooling around.
A gripe I've noticed are men/women who were caught by someone who didn't divulge their marital status. It is people's feelings you mess with.
If I had known he was married, then I'd have distanced myself immediately. Now I set boundaries and told him I can be nothing more than just a friend.
Separated and process of divorce still mean you are married.
I have a guy in the process of divorce interested in me. It only came to light recently that he is still married. Needless to say, I told him exactly what my stance is and that he messed with my feelings. This after I thought he is interested and single. I am attracted to him, BUT that does not mean to entertain anything, because his wife is entitled to him, not me.
He then said he can imagine me and him to which I replied:
Imagination after a while may no longer suffice. It leaves you with unfulfilled expectations and then empty finally with regret for what could have been or loss of what you had.
He then asked about faithfulness.
I responded: Faithfulness is up to you. Your choice whether you are going to toss the chance of living a rare and true love. A fear perhaps that you can have it which means becoming naked in who you are. To live is a choice, to die is inevitable. Difference is what amount of living you die with.
He was stunned and impressed. It did make him think though.
Has anyone gone or is currently in a scenario like this? What did you do?
How to Make a Woman Happy
It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47.. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* arrangements she makes
HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Show up naked
2. Bring food and beer
We've got pretend marriages, hook-ups, break-ups etc. so I thought we could go for the ultimate power couples. Those who can stick together.
Anyone want to shoot me for what I'm about to say? Take a number and join the queue. Bambi is always there to match others, so she can go first this time.
Bambi & Jeromme
LatinPrincess4U & Puck
Mmmm, I think this is where I'll stop to stay in good stead.
I saw the classiest Bachelorette and why leave the guys behind?:
If I have forgotten anyone, forgive me. No doubt I'll be reminded. :):)
So many left and so many new ones to get to know. :)
A friend of mine's boyfriend told her he wants a 2 week break. Needless to say she was devastated. I've been consoling her in this time period. They were all supposed to go away this weekend.
Anyway, to make a long story short, it came out that he was too afraid to tell her that her oldest daughter is the problem. She manipulates my friend (told her that), but I can understand, she is 16 and at a very difficult age. He cannot stand the way she treats my friend and he feels he cannot be involved.
I thought it was not good ethics on his side. He should have told her the truth and not just said he wants a break.
I advised her to speak to her daughter and tell her the truth. My friend reckons this is the one for her. I told her somewhere along the line resentment towards her daughter is going to come up.
She had the talk and her daughter was understanding. She is yet to confront him. He doesn't know she knows, but a friend of his who he confided in told my friend.
Have any of you been in this situation and how did you handle it?
I had a good laugh.
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
James Holt McGavran
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
Friday while having a cup of tea with two friends we talked about relationships etc, when one came up with the following.
Apparently a good sex life makes a woman's skin look better. Then she commented on how lovely my skin is looking. I referred to the fact that healthy eating, exercise and a good skin care routine does wonders for the skin also. Not to mention that there is no man in my life could not support her theory.
Anyway, I had a good laugh.
may this day bring you happiness
not just kisses in the wind
may this day remind you of life
not sad moments alone spent
may you this day find love
may you this day spread
all the beauty of love and kindness
as one unending thread
Hope ya'll have a wonderful Valentine's Day regardless of where you find yourselves.
I sit here to read what has been going on and came to a couple of blogs where new issues have come up.
Please understand, I do not mean this condescendingly, but I laughed (much needed). This is a nice break from the week I've been having. If only, what you some of you are experiencing was the complication.
I've been blown out of the water by 2 men telling me they love me when they cannot even think of doing that. Needless to say I'm shocked. This in one WEEK!!
That just makes me wonder if there is someone out there who is free to love me, who actually has the right to say that to me. This, after I have made it clear in general talks what my stance is on unforbidden love. I am now going to lose 2 great guys, because of that, because I'm cutting ties. I cannot continue the relationships I initially saw as just good friendships.
Guys, why do you do this? Not all women will accept your love when you must only love your wife in a romantic way.
Well I'm excited. Getting my ride next week at the sprint.
By Me Copyright 2004
You embraced me as I sat
Snuggly fitted into your contours
Before speaking in melodies
As we waltzed into horizons
You took me to heights of pleasure
As I reeled with delight
Heightening my senses
As you intensified each bite
You are admired
Sometimes observed from afar
How could they understand this fascination
To the two you are only a rally car
Scenario: You meet a wonderful man/woman and you decide to get married or enter into a lifetime commitment. You decided to date and wait before you sleep with each other.
With all the VDs and AIDS going around, will you go for a test at the request of your partner as an ultimatum for taking the relationship further?
A group of us discussed this over dinner and there were clearly two camps. It got a bit uncomfortable. Trust me to stir hot topics. :):)
That is one of my prerequisites as I've just heard and seen a few shocking situations where the spouse brought home diseases that the other one has to live with.
What is your take?
I've been reading countless blogs of naming, blaming, shaming and whatever else you would like to call it.
It is wonderful to read how some people use the word integrity and all the good values that should accompany the blogs, but in the next sentence go right against what they said doing exactly what they are accusing others of.
Bottomline, we are all different personalities, beliefs, ideas etc etc etc and cannot fully agree with each other. Surely we can agree to disagree, keep it clean and take personal issues offline.
There is enough adversity going on in each of our lives to have another add to it. I'm sure some of you are going through very rough patches just to be battered here further. NO PEOPLE, this cannot be it!
Even if you dislike someone, you can still be kind to them. If the person ticks you off so bad, why not just leave their blog and don't comment?
The purpose of these blogs is to share opinions in a good way that even when a debate gets heated, all walk away intact.
Most of us are here to find the other half that completes us. Rightly commented on by a few bloggers, your potential partner may be reading your blogs and think 'oh dear not for me .....'
You're all special in your own way and there are really great people here (all of you). Can we have some of the greatness shine through now, please?
Puck and I are going on a date, here in Cape Town. I'm chartering (just another nice word for stealing) a jet.
While we're at it, some members of MM can come with. Who would you match up with each other and why?
I don't cause wars, I start them. hehehehe.
This from a man's perspective, brought a very nice chuckle.
60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)
As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:
A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting. Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her. Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!
Andy Rooney is a really smart guy!
Whilst out shopping, I wondered if La Senza (lingerie) shop is just in SA or is it overseas as well. You seen it in your area?
Sometimes it is cheaper to buy overseas than over here.
Then I wondered, when a woman is lingerie shopping, men always wonder what specific man that is for. I love lingerie and wear it just because. Guys seem to think that that cannot be the case.
You guys look at a beautiful woman and will comment on it while a lady friend is with you. You cannot help your eyes to stray, but they do. Some women handle it well and you move on. Here's my question.
I was completely taken aback when I had my eyes wander to some cars and made comments about them. Well, did he get upset! Needless to say, that was the last of him.
Another question is, why can some guys not handle a woman looking at a man either?
What is the difference between you looking and us looking?
Kindly provided by Chuckw on another blog.
I have a question. Only two particular guys in my life kissed me on my forehead and hugged me close to them.
For the one this rings true. Whenever I talk about my future man still out there somewhere this particular kisser, gets upset. So if this upsets him, why isn't he trying to date me? Guys can you help?
He's done the arms around the waist thing too. So all these meanings make me wonder if they ring true. :):)
"What A Kiss Means"
*Kiss on the stomach-----"lets have sex"
*Kiss on the Forehead ----"Forever you will be mine"
*Kiss on the Ear ---"I'm horny"
*Kiss on the Cheek ---"We're friends"
*Kiss on the Hand ---"I adore you"
*Kiss on the Neck ---"We belong together"
*Kiss on the Shoulder ---"I want you"
*Kiss on the Lips ---"I love you" OR "I want you"
*Holding Hands ---"We can learn to love each other"
*Slap on the Butt ---"That's mine"
*Playing with the Ear ---"I can't live without you"
*Holding on tight ---"Don't let go"
*Looking into each other's Eyes ---"Don't leave me"
*Playing with Hair on Head ---"Tell me you love me"
*Arms around the Waist ---"I love you too much to let go"
*Laughing while Kissing ---"I am completely Comfortable with you"