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Look for the Silver Lining
72 Views
07/07/08
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It can be very difficult to find positive things when faced with an adverse life situation. With a little structure and time though you can find things that will make you feel far more positive and thus life will seem better. I offer the following to you and see if it helps you
Take a piece of paper and draw 3 columns.
In the first column write down the situation you are facing e.g. starting a new job
In middle column describe your initial thoughts on the situation; were you angry, upset, worried etc. What is making you feel that way e.g. I feel anxious as I will know no one and will the job be the one I thought it was?
In the 3rd column list ways to reinterpret your thoughts in a positive way e.g. I am not anxious I am excited; I can use my anxiety to motivate me to do well; I do not know anyone so this is an opportunity to meet new people. Ask yourself what good can come from the situation? What lessons can I apply to the future? What strengths do I have as a result? what else could this experience mean?
Should you struggle ask a trusted friend to help you find ideas. With practice you will find positive reinterpretation becomes a positive habit
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What have I done?
134 Views
07/02/08
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How about just taking a minute or two to think about what you do best, what have you done successfully in your life?
Isn't it strange how we dwell over our mistakes and spend ages thinking about them rather than what we have achieved. Think what you have accomplished in the last day, week, month or year!
What do you want to achieve in both the short and long term and then go for those stars and when you look back be proud!
You may surprise yourself with all that you have accopmlished when you start to look around
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Coffee Anyone?
96 Views
06/27/08
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A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.
Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the hot coffee.
When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for each of you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress.
What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup. But you consciously went for the best cups and were eyeing each other's cups. Now if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change.
Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."
So, don't let the cups drive you... enjoy the coffee instead
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Pity party
209 Views
06/19/08
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I saw earlier a blog now gone where someone was feeling they deserved a pity party. Whilst I understand the feeling I am always of the opinion that you do not have to travel very far from your home to find someone who has it a lot worse. Too many do not take the time or make the effort to look at the lives of others and see what they are experiencing. So perhaps you should take a minute and think about some people who would think you have a lot, perhaps then your situation will not seem so bad after all!
Count your blessings What do you give thanks for that makes your life so rich?
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Make Everyday Count
87 Views
06/14/08
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Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen.
Let yourself fall in love, even if it doesn't seem right because you are too young or too far, just follow your heart. Surround yourself with those who make you smile, laugh, and make you happy.
Break free and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you.
Create your own life then let go and live it.
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Aging Disgracefully
104 Views
06/11/08
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To commemorate her birthday , actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favourite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'. Here are the lyrics she used:
(Sing It!)-If you sing it, its especially hysterical!!!
Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favourite things.
Cadillacs and cataracts, and hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favourite things.
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favourite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favourite things.
Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favourite things.
When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.
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Hope
77 Views
06/04/08
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If you can look at the sunset and smile, then you still have hope
If you can find beauty in the colours of a small flower, then you still have hope
If you can find pleasure in the movement of a butterfly, then you still have hope
If the smile of a child can still warm your heart, then you still have hope
If you can see the good in other people, then you still have hope
If the rain breaking on a roof top can still lull you to sleep, then you still have hope
If the sight of a rainbow still makes you stop and stare in wonder, then you still have hope
If the soft fur of a favored pet still feels pleasant under your fingertips, then you still have hope
If you meet new people with a trace of excitement and optimism, then you still have hope
If you give people the benefit of a doubt, then you still have hope
If you still offer your hand in friendship to others that have touched your life, then you still have hope
If receiving an unexpected card or letter still brings a pleasant surprise, then you still have hope
If the suffering of others still fills you with pain and frustration, then you still have hope
If you refuse to let a friendship die, or accept that it must end, then you still have hope
If you look forward to a time or place of quiet and reflection, then you still have hope
If you still buy the ornaments, put up the Christmas tree or cook the turkey, then you still have hope
If you still watch love stories or want the endings to be happy, then you still have hope
If you can look to the past and smile, then you still have hope
If, when faced with the bad, when told everything is futile, you can still look up and end the conversation with the phrase yeah..BUT.. Then you still have hope
Hope is such a marvelous thing. It bends, it twists, it sometimes hides, but rarely does it break
It sustains us when nothing else can It gives us reason to continue and courage to move ahead, when we tell ourselves we?d rather give in
Hope puts a smile on our face when the heart cannot manage
Hope puts our feet on the path when our eyes cannot see it
Hope moves us to act when our souls are confused of the direction
Hope is a wonderful thing, something to be cherished and nurtured, and something that will refresh us in return
And it can be found in each of us, and it can bring light into the darkest of places
Never lose hope!!!
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Wisdom
56 Views
06/03/08
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I always like positive quotations and so I would like to share some of them with you
Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. Plato
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. Jimi Hendrix
One of the greatest pieces of economic wisdom is to know what you do not know. John Kenneth Gilbraith
Life is a continual process of remaking ourselves.
And finally one I really always enjoy
Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit
Wisdom is knowing not to put tomato in a fruit salad ;)
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Reposting Rose
52 Views
06/02/08
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I posted this piece some time ago but felt it was so good and with so many new people here I thought it might be nice to repost it. I thought it very moving but also very poignant for internet dating
John Blanchard stood up from the bench, straightened his Army uniform, and studied the crowd of people making their way through Grand Central Station. He looked for the girl whose heart he knew, but whose face he didn't, the girl with the rose.
His interest in her had begun thirteen months before in a Florida library. Taking a book off the shelf he found himself intrigued, not with the words of the book, but with the notes penciled in the margin. The soft handwriting reflected a thoughtful soul and insightful mind. In the front of the book, he discovered the previous owner's name, Miss Hollis Maynell. With time and effort he located her address. She now lived in New York City. He wrote her a letter introducing himself and inviting her to correspond.
The next day he was shipped overseas for service in World War II. During the next year and one month the two grew to know each other through the mail. Each letter was a seed falling on a fertile heart. A romance was budding.
Blanchard requested a photograph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wouldn't matter what she looked like.
When the day finally came for him to return from Europe, they scheduled their first meeting - 7:00 PM at the Grand Central Station in New York. "You'll recognize me," she wrote, "by the red rose I'll be wearing on my lapel."
So at 7:00 he was in the station looking for a girl whose heart he loved, but whose face he'd never seen.
I'll let Mr. Blanchard tell you what happened:
A young woman was coming toward me, her figure long and slim. Her blonde hair lay back in curls from her delicate ears; her eyes were blue as flowers. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime come alive. I started toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was not wearing a rose. As I moved, a small, provocative smile curved her lips.
"Going my way, sailor?" she murmured.
Almost uncontrollably I made one step closer to her, and then I saw Hollis Maynell.
She was standing almost directly behind the girl. A woman well past 40, she had greying hair tucked under a worn hat. She was more than plump, her thick-ankled feet thrust into low-heeled shoes.
The girl in the green suit was walking quickly away. I felt as though I was split in two, so keen was my desire to follow her, and yet so deep was my longing for the woman whose spirit had truly companioned me and upheld my own. And there she stood. Her pale, plump face was gentle and sensible, her grey eyes had a warm and kindly twinkle. I did not hesitate.
My fingers gripped the small worn blue leather copy of the book that was to identify me to her. This would not be love, but it would be something precious, something perhaps even better than love, a friendship for which I had been and must ever be grateful.
I squared my shoulders and saluted and held out the book to the woman, even though while I spoke I felt choked by the bitterness of my disappointment.
"I'm Lieutenant John Blanchard, and you must be Miss Maynell. I am so glad you could meet me; may I take you to dinner?"
The woman's face broadened into a tolerant smile. "I don't know what this is about, son," she answered, "but the young lady in the green suit who just went by, she begged me to wear this rose on my coat. And she said if you were to ask me out to dinner, I should go and tell you that she is waiting for you in the big restaurant across the street. She said it was some kind of test!"
It's not difficult to understand and admire Miss Maynell's wisdom. The true nature of a heart is seen in its response to the unattractive. "Tell me whom you love," Houssaye wrote, "And I will tell you who you are."
~ Author Unknown ~
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Stress
76 Views
06/02/08
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A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience,
raised a glass of water and asked:
'How heavy is this glass of water?'
Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter.
It depends on how long you try to hold it.
If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.
If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.
If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.
In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.'
He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management.
If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, As the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on. '
'As with the glass of water,you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.
When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.' 'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down.
Don't carry it home.
You can pick it up tomorrow.
Whatever burdens you're carrying now,let them down for a moment if you can.'
So, put down anything that may be a burden to you right now.
Don't pick it up again until after you've rested a while.
Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life:
* Accept that some days you're the pigeon,and some days you're the statue.
* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again,
it was probably worth it..
* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply be kind to others.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Birthdays are good for you.
The more you have, the longer you live.
* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
* We could learn a lot from crayons... Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colours, but they all have to live in the same box.
*A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour..
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NCO XXVII (Return to Sanity)
1052 Views
02/21/07
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I removed NCO XXVI because for some they felt it was not a positive blog. I feel that some they did not read the whole content as I was using the past drama to highlight how important truth is on such a site as this. I feel it has served its purpose in a way to allow some to vent their disquiet about untruths and about some who assist in the propogation of other peoples falsehoods.
Once you post something on here it is in the public domain and will be subject to scrutiny. Some will read it as you intended and others will take a 180 view and there will be every shade in between, such are the problems of communication. If you do not like the idea of being criticised then you should not post details of your personal life on here! I am hoping that now with this final episode we can return to some degree of sanity.
Lies on here will always be found out particularly if they are big. Small lies such giving the wrong age or putting on a false picture will also be found out eventually. Once dicovered that someone is lying even if only a tiny lie then what else is being lied about. A site like this relies heavily on the truth, for some the truth can seem to be hurtful but surely the truth should always be told. Lies will destroy a site like this as has been shown over the last month or so. Currently people on here doubt the veracity of other members and regularly challenge them to verify if they are real. Is that how a site such as this should be run? Why should we have to go through this routine it would not have been needed had the original parties not lied and others had not compounded the lie. Due to a small minority of so called single members the rest have to suffer!
Honesty is something I value and ask that everyone here posts with honesty and if you do not like the posting fine you have the right to say so but make it a postive statement and not get into the mud slinging that has been seen
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Giving 100% and more
152 Views
02/13/07
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I know this is an old one but I thought might make a few people smile
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
and
H-A-R-D W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
But,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
And,
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
But, look how far you can go!
A-S-S K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullsh*t and As*Kissing that will put you over the top.
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