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southernstarr2006
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total posts: 365
Blog title: '' Thoughts and other things"
Blog description:An idea of who I am what I think about...a little insight into my world...welcome
My blog address: http://MillionaireMatch.com/blog/southernstarr2006
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-------{@ Hilary for President in 2008 !! @}--------- 1352 Views 01/22/07
OK..I tried this before and no replies... " She is a woman a very popular woman " She will be our very first female President....I really would like to know your thoughts.. not necessarily about Hilary but about a woman being president....come on guys this is a great subject....sooo one more time... Ladies and Gentleman ... What are your thoughts and opinions ..fears ..doubts and vision...concerning a woman being elected the president of the U. S. of A. ???? Do you think it a good thing a great event ..or perhaps do you feel it may throw us into chaos... Is this just the beginning of female supremacy.. ...In most of the movies now...women rule...while men are cowering or laying in the mud all beat up.... Thoughts??? Erica Anne @)----------
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-----{@Can we truly love unconditionally?@}----- 872 Views 11/03/06
I suspect that the only people we can truly love unconditionally are our children, and even then, there are scenarios where we might have to exercise "tough love." It can never truly apply to a dating or marriage partner. You can't really love them no matter what, because there are just some behaviors that no one should have to put up with. What if they develop a drug or alcohol addiction that they refuse to try to quit? What if they cheat on you? What if they physically abuse you? What if they molest your kids? What if they're convicted of a crime where they're going to be in jail for the rest of their life?
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* *******@ Obituary of the late ...@****** * 143 Views 11/07/06
Mr.. Common Sense Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 -year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him.....pass it on... If not, join the majority and do nothing. Received in mail today...
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-{@ Who do you think is more romantic women or men ? @} 230 Views 11/03/06
perhaps this is a boring blog...
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---{@ * Happy Birthday !!! * @}---- 139 Views 11/05/06
I want to wish you a very happy and hope when you blow your birthday cake candles out - you remember to make a wish. Every happiness to you :)
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"The atmosphere of Love..." 1053 Views 06/09/06
Love is not deserved ..((Love is.)) When we love another truly , He/ she does not have to "measure up. " We accept and love him as he is...This is the kind of love which Paul says bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things. When we know we are loved in this way..then and only then, can we dare throw our masks into the corner and reveal ourselves. Only in such an atmosphere of love and acceptance can real trust, intimacy and openness flourish and grow. My question is when we say we love do we truly love? Are we really open to true unselfish love..are our hearts truly open and willing to accept a possible lifetime mate at face value...are we willing to accept them for whom they truly are...with all their flaws , faults ,fears and baggage (I hate this word ) and we all carry baggage...if you have a history a past you have baggage...we all have been disappointed we all have been hurt..we all have fears... we all are damaged...are we truly open to opportunities to meeting our possible life partner ...and if they are standing right there in front of us..do they really have a heart beat of a chance....can we see past the physical or what we have established as being acceptable in not only our eyes but in societies eyes.....can we truly be open to a non perfect person ... for none of us are perfect...are we truly willing to accept them for whom they are not expecting change or entertaining the thought that we can change them....or are we simply trying to fill " Our Personal Wish List " Could it possibly be that our expectations wants needs desires are paramount..can anyone truly " measure up " Are we looking for that sometimes almost too elusive perfect "whole package."...Is this why there are so many souls out there wondering and asking why can't I meet anyone ...why is it so difficult to meet " the one...." Is this why there are so many misrepresentations of whom we actually are is this why we misrepresent ...our age our financial status ....our height we will even lie about if we smoke ..is this reason we do this ...that we only want to be accepted by others...Just where is the love that we are all longing for.....that true "unconditional " love everyone speaks of dreams of wants needs and desires....I ask myself why aren't there more stories of successful pairings... why are so many of us finding that we are still alone.....and some of us are even feeling that they are without hope....or are now losing hope and faith that they will ever find anyone......how sad....how tragic this is.. Perhaps all of us should reach deep down inside and ask why...could it possibly be that we just expect too much? something to think about.....
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*@*What Does Being Successful Mean To You? *@* 205 Views 10/15/06
There is a picture on the wall in my bedroom. Success is living the life you want to live. I can remember as a child thinking that I would only be a success if I had a career where I earned a great deal of money and had the house and cars and so on.. I remember feeling envy towards some I knew who had huge houses. As I grew up ofcourse I realised that truth and that all the money in the world can't truly buy happiness. Money is merely a tool. A useful tool that can enrich our lives or destroy it depending on how we view and use that tool. Then I started to view success as gaining the fame I seeked. I wanted to stand up in front of thousands and to have the ability to move them to tears with my music. And then later on I wanted to conduct the music that could evoke the emotions I felt in the songs. And then one day that happened. I stood up and sang and recieved my first standing ovation (hey it was only at a church but it was one none the less *LOL*). Afterwards I had an elderly lady (We all called her Grandmom out of respect and love) come up to me with tears in her eyes and told me that I'd sung like an angel a song that had been her favorite song (it was an old Grace Fields song) I realised that I didn't need to perform at the Met or on any grand stage to accomplish my dreams. I only had to do what was in my heart and to give it my all. I think that true success is merely being able to live out the hopes and desires of our heart. There have been times in my life where I was too scared to hope or dream. But it was in those times that I learned how very important it is to always look towards a dream.. to always have hope. We might never reach our dreams but we can always look up to them and aspire towards them. Sometimes it is those dreams that inspire and bring about the greatest accomplishments. Almost every thing that we use in todays society was once a dream.. a hope.. a thought. I think that success to me is viewed as being able to fulfill the dreams we have. I think I AM a success. I still have many new dreams to live out. I might not obtain them all but I think that my life is very successful. Will I ever give up or simply settle. No way. I'm a fighter to the core. I'll struggle and fight the fates if I must to achieve my goals. I may never reach some of my goals and dreams. I think perhaps that is why dreams can change and evolve. Perhaps success in it's raw form is being able to go to bed each night and knowing that you've accomplished one small step forward in life. Success is living life your way. Leigh
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***@*@*@* I Just Don't Get It !! *@*@*@*** 777 Views 10/13/06
I just read a blog that disturbed me a bit..what bothered me about it is how we tend to judge others ..even harshly so...without really knowing anything about them or their lives...we observe and we see what we want...we judge out of our own perception clouded with our own experience...I mean who are we to judge anyone..when we can't even get it right ourselves....I ask myself how many mistakes have I made...how many more does it take for me just to get it...You put your trust in someone how many times before you get it that they are just not trust worthy...how much pain does one have to suffer and endure before they stay away from the fire. How much hurt and pain do we have to cause before we get it ..and understand that the pain and sorrow that we create will come back on us in some way in some fashion or the other.... Philip..the gentleman who just died...I thought he was so healthy he thought he was so healthy...He did not do drugs..he exercised....he loved good rich food..but was a fanatic about every thing he ate..always worried about every thing he put in his mouth....that and exercise and how he looked was paramount in his mind...he was obsessively clean...when I was there if I left even one drop of water..or crumb he was behind me sweeping it up....he worried about this ..about that.....he did not want people in his home....because he liked perfection..his yard did not have a living thing in it..he had beautiful well kept yard...a bird house that was to die for....once at breakfast as I gazed out the french doors ..I thought out loud..saying..I cant wait for Spring it is going to be so lovely...with all the beautiful birds singing and ..he cut me off..saying .." NO...Erica...there are not going to be any birds singing...I shoot the birds...when one has birds there comes ...the pests...the squirrels..the lizards..etc etc....I shoot the squirrels too......I noticed after that ..there was nothing living around his house..nothing....except us...and all of a sudden I felt we were sitting in a tomb instead of a beautiful home.... Philip was a good lesson for me...I loved him...but was never in love with him....I tried to love him like he wanted me too..but just could not manage it...I love life too much...I am passionate about life and people...and I see it as a precious gift...I knew the day I drove back home ..I had this sinking feeling this sadness..thinking I should be on top of the world ..I am engaged..but no it was if my world was slowly going dark as if the sun was put on one of those dimmer switches..and some great hand was slowly turning down the light...I couldn't help thinking about how my life would be with him...then as the thunder rolled loudly over head..a bright flash of lightening and I had this epiphany...vision? Whatever one wants to call it...but it was as real as the sun coming up every morning....the vision was of me...in a coffin...looking up as the lid was closing over it.... I knew then I could never marry him....he died soon after this....there was really never any closure...he never accepted the fact I could not love him in the way he wanted...his take on it was..keep the ring Erica..you do not know what you want..your scared..you just need time...I watched him fade away in the next coming weeks...we never discussed our relationship...he was weak..but I know he was happy I was there that is if one can be happy when they know they are b now going to die within weeks of just planning out the rest of their lives.......One night he woke suddenly...sit up and called my name grabbed me and held me tight ..with his weak feeble arms..and he hugged me with all his strength...saying I love you ...Baby.....that was the last moment of affection....and of Philip..... He spent all of his days in worry about what others would think...he practically starved himself just to have a flat stomach so he could wear the same size slacks that he did in college...I can't help but ask myself.....what was it all for ??? I guess My point is that we spend our lives...worrying about the wrong things..we unfairly judge others that we do not know...we point accusing fingers at people we blame for our poor choices....we observe..we attack..we criticize ..we cause pain and we do harm ...we think we know everything and that we are right...we try to control...we live with bitterness anger and fear within our hearts......we are selfish and self absorbed..never having enough always wanting more...we become bored when not entertained enough and we complain complain complain.........and then we wonder why...and we began to ask ourselves.."why am I not happy.....why am I not loved...the way I want to be loved......" What is it all about???????? My question is when do we get it...or do we ever get it.... Thoughts...???? Erica Anne @)----------
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* @*@*@** Inside The Sandbox **@*@*@* 341 Views 10/10/06
WOW... I can't decide! But being only 11, I guess it's OK?? Seriously, I think I can relate a little bit to all the "children" but probably my strongest connections would be to the spiritual and playful children. I hope my family and friends would agree. Erica, you always have the most thought provoking blogs! Please keep them coming... I've grown to love reading all the blogs even if I don't respond to all of them. I'm already missing JLogan and now Healey and I didn't even know them like you do! And Candieleigh too! ;-)
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@@@ The Catty and The Conniving BEAST@@@ 953 Views 09/25/06
-----{@@@@@@@@@}----- I received this book today...from a dear male friend..someone I have shared my experiences with here and off the Internet...He also read Tuesdays With Morrie to me to help me deal with the coming loss of Daddy...I will always love him for this...His consideration and sweet thought to me has been of profound benefit to me... -----{@@@@@@@@@}----- The following is an exert from the book..@ Mean Girls All Grown Up: Surviving Catty and Conniving Women@@ Another Survival Manual...My feeling is what a shame anyone would need this...I suggest it.. It makes for good reading and understanding of these women...and men..for men can be just as unforgiving and catty as women. @}-----@}-----@@@@----{@-----{@ @@@ The mean Girl. The BEAST. The one who tears at your flesh and devours your heart. She growls when you walk by. She hisses as you leave. She probably drools over you in her sleep. She is a beast all right, plain and simple. Its evident in all she is and all she does. So what do you do with a BEAST in your life? Can you find a hint of hope, or are you destined to spend your life running in fear from this rabid female? @@ Women have become the most catty, manipulative emotional people on the planet, and you are at their mercy. Or are you? " Mean Girls all Grown UP" is a call to spiritual strength..A Call to Stand Firm. It is a call to face the Beasts in your life head on and with a faithful resolve. ..@@ @}-----@}-----@@@@----{@-----{@ Why are women so catty? What makes a women feel she has to strike out in such a negative manner ..what makes women lash out in an insecure hateful way.....what makes women gossip maliciously and insult someone they don't even know? why do women have to be vicious and nasty to one another? I have been a victim and have seen piranha elbowing here. I have seen and have experienced women declare how nice they are but underhandedly and secretively strike out with intent to destroy another woman's character...why? For what reason? Because she may be attractive..sweet...write well..may be well liked...may be more talented...or she just simply receives a lot of attention..I just don't get it ....why do these women feel so threatened that they have to destroy and condemn another woman.....spreading wicked nasty ugly groundless lies and rumors that are just this alone...lies and groundless Rumors...How can anyone judge another human being without ever talking with them much less seeing them in person....what kind of person sits in front of his/ her computer screen thinking up ugly nasty things to say about someone else they don't even know......what kind of mind does this..what kind of heart...spirit does it take to do such a thing....and what kind of People jump on the band wagon and contribute to such ugliness...all with nothing in hand but their own insecurities and self absorbed self pity......What a destructive way to live...What makes women MEAN ? What makes Men Mean ? I believe we get back what we put out..what goes around eventually comes back around to us... Whatever happened to the simple thought and idea of the " Golden Rule " Do unto others as you would have them do unto you....Have we forgotten these profound words...Why not think with love and appreciation in our hearts...why not celebrate the uniqueness of another human being ...What cost is it ..to just be @@ NICE @@..Isn't there enough hate and chaos in the world...I don't know about anyone else...but I simply choose @@ NOT @@ to be a part of it....So to all of you women and men .. I salute each and everyone of you for the wonderment that is you...the uniqueness that is you...the beauty that is you.... Peace and Love to all..yes even those who are sitting there thinking up the next ugliness to bestowed on our world....or on me for that matter...God Bless you All! Erica Anne@>------------------
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@@@ Questionable Connections @@@ 227 Views 09/09/06
Depends what special means.If special is an old friend then it clearly wouldn't bother me in the least. If special is an old boy friend she hasn't gotten over then I probably shouldn't be with her in the first place.
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@@@ Is He or She a Flirt ?@@@ 615 Views 09/09/06
Hi Erica Anne....good question. I personally feel that if you are married or engaged or in a serious relationship, you should not be blatantly flirting with other women, either on line or in person. I know there are married men here on MM, jlogan comes to mind. But I honestly do not see him flirting with women, he just writes good, thought provoking blogs. But I am sure there are other married men on here that hide the fact that they are really not available. I have no respect for men who are supposedly in a relationship, yet continue on their merry way as if they weren't. Having been in the position of the wife who has been cheated on, I would never want to inflict that upon another woman. And I would sure never want to be involved again with a man who was not faithful, in every respect. And respect is what is boils down to. Respect for your partner, your relationship, your committment. If you don't respect it, then end it. Don't keep living a lie. That's just my opinion. I could be wrong.
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@@@ Another chance? @@@ 956 Views 09/09/06
Should you give a cheating partner another chance?
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@ @@@ Emotional Affairs @@@@ 948 Views 09/03/06
jardoxx...Let me clarify this..This blog is just to stimulate thought..conversation..Do ya agree or not..why? ....I am not personally involved or wish to know just for my curiosity..everything written does not necessarily reflect my personal observation ..opinion or thought...about the Jr.High thing...I never felt compelled I had to keep up with anything or latch on...I was a free thinking spirit then as I am now.. I sense a little hostility here..Are you OK? J..the really great thing in life is we are given choice...thank you for posting. Erica Anne@)---------
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' You realise of course that we can never be friends" 587 Views 09/02/06
Harry: You realise of course that we can never be friends. Sally: Why not? Harry: What I'm saying is... and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form, is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way. Sally: That's not true, I have a number of men friends and there's is no sex involved. Harry: No you don't. Sally: Yes I do. Harry: No you don't. Sally: Yes I do. Harry: You only think you do. Sally: You're saying I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge? Harry: No, what I'm saying is they all want to have sex with you. Sally: They do not. Harry: Do too. Sally: They do not. Harry: Do too. Sally: How do you know? Harry: Because no man can be friends with a woman he finds attractive, he always wants to have sex with her. Sally: So you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive. Harry: Nuh, you pretty much wanna nail'em too. Sally: What if they don't want to have sex with you? Harry: Doesn't matter, because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story. Sally: Well I guess we're not going to be friends then. Harry: Guess not. Sally: That's too bad. You are the only person I knew in New York. Ok ladies and gentlemen..Can men and women who are attracted to one another ever be " Just Friends"...??? This is a question I am asking myself these days...I really would appreciate your thoughts..Thank you... Erica Anne@}------------
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" This ones for you....." (( Friends1st )) 301 Views 06/11/06
Born to Love...this is for you R...... We all need love..With all our complexities, we are not easy creatures to satisfy. We cannot meet the conditions of a satisfied life by gorging ourselves, lying down on the grass, and starring at the clouds. We have deeper needs than the brute, and the deepest one is love. Babies cannot live on milk alone. They are born with a nature that requires love. There are many confirmed cases in which babies received nourishment and shelter yet wasted away for lack of love. With the passing of time the once-baby -now- adult has a greater need to give love than to receive it, to feel love more than he needs to be felt by it. But we often think too much in terms of receiving love instead of giving it. However we are not babies and as adults we need to scatter our affections around. We grownups like the attention too. We enjoy being pampered. It is gratifying to receive. But there is much more fulfillment and higher ecstasy in having a heart so filled with love that it finds more joy in giving than in receiving. Our need for love is born within us. Without the ministries of love we would perish. The child is born with a greater need to receive love than to give it..yet as he develops ,the need becomes urgent in both respects...I believe the need of love is universal as man himself. Wherever we walk, on every shore and every in every climate, the need for love is constantly with us. Our hearts cry out for affection. This implanted longing is proof that we are akin to God for " God is Love." As the child receives love it learns to give love. That beginning emotion normally grows and grows until it embraces many people, even self, and many things. As this lovely force multiplies, it contributes to the spark an vigor of the individual preparing him for a life a little lower than the angels.. Love is not a fantasy it is not just a topic for poets and philosophers. It is not just an idealistic longing for those who roam the silvery heavens. It is a state of the heart for now and here, for the people here on earth. Loving is as real as living. It is the power we need to transverse life's pathway and to hurdle obstacles. It is the cushion that softens the hard knocks we receive, it is the consideration that pillow the gentle blows we give. Love controls conduct. No mad dog has it. And when the world turns mad it is devoid of it. It is not trite, therefore to say that love will solve our problems, no more stereo typed than to say that food sustains life. Without food we die...and without love we die a death worse than physical. Love is the supreme good in life....you tell me what do we have without it? What is left? Where would we be..what would the meaning of life..the purpose of life? Where would we be without love or the dream of love or the hope of love ? Love alone is capable of uniting living beings in such a way as to complete them and fulfill them, for it alone takes them and joins them by what is deepest in themselves. Think about it the most satisfying joy in the world is having a person dearer to you than your own self, a person with whom you feel free to pour out and share your every thought, your every grief and your every joy..for it is with this person you feel a deep unity of spirits . This is love this is what we all live for this is what it is all about. Now then...Did I answer your questions? Well you will have to admit that I had a good go of it? Didn't I ?....wink Erica Anne. @)------------- Erica @)----------
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" Tell me about the good ole days......" 437 Views 06/12/06
Another great post! When I look back to the good ole days, I think what I miss most is my innocence, before time and experience began leaving their marks. On the other hand, one must grow up and learn to make choices for oneself. Today is the best day of my life.
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" Do we (( Need )) or Do we (( Want )) love? " 2179 Views 05/22/06
First of all, we are talking about one's belief's about love. You can choose to believe you need love or only want it. The difference to me is that needing is an absolute demand, while wanting is a preference. When we think we need love, we make love an absolute condition of our happiness and self worth. Need is like oxygen, something you have to have. Preference is desirable, but you don't have to have it to be happy or feel okay about yourself. Believing your need love is unhealthy because it makes you desperate for love, anxious about losing it and depressed if you lose it. Wanting love is health because it will motivate you but without creating desperation, anxiety or depression. Once you realize you don't need love, you will be more willing to seek out more desirable individuals, not just the safe ones. You will have much more power in a relationship. You won't put up with bad treatment. In short, you are much more likely to have a satisfying love relationship. It is ironic that the more we think we need something, the less able we are to have it. Coming to really believe that you don't need love, while healthy, also takes some work. The idea that we need love is very common, as you can prove very easily. Just listen to the radio and in a few minutes, you will hear a song with lyrics like, "I can't live without you". That sounds very romantic, but it isn't really true. One reason why people love the idea of needing love is that they are chasing an illusion - that if you can only find the right person, everything will be wonderful and you will "live happily ever after". While a good love relationship can add a lot to your life satisfaction, it isn't the end all of happiness. There are no Cinderellas or Prince Charmings, just us human beings. Any relationship will have it's plusses and minuses. The trick is to find and create a relationship where both parties can be better off by being together. So, to summarize, it is much healthier (and more realistic) to seek love because you want it, not out of a desperate need. Now the above may be true enough but..the flip side is.. My uncle and aunt met and fell in love immediately...they were married in a few months ofmeeting. They were happily married for years and years..She once told me..she loved my Uncle and needed him..that if something were to happen to Uncle Bill that she knew she could not live without him. On another occasion He said the same about her. Cancer took my Uncle not too many years after this..After his death my aunt followed him exactly a year to date after his passing. She was young too...the doctors could not find one thing wrong with her..they put on her death certificate ..." Died of Natural Causes." I know she died of a broken heart because she simply did not wish to live in this world without him...I have heard of this happening several times in my life to others..and I know of at least two other instances that I have seen this has happened with my own eyes. It seems to me these people (( needed )) the love that they shared and each other to live. Am I wrong? It does give one pause does it not? Love to all.. Erica Anne Comments and Thoughts are welcome Erica @)----------
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" We Create Our Own Experiences " 1498 Views 05/21/06
I felt this was worth posting again... In the past weeks I have noticed the quality of blogging content has diminished...Individuals have posted negative feelings and emotions..disappointments and frustrations and some I have read our even hopeless in their attitudes...there are so many why me stories that are sad..and tug at ones heart. There have been many negative accusations.. responses and attacks on others. Although I do understand the disappointment and frustration with the technical side of it all.. what totally escapes me is why this venue which can be used as a positive bridge to reaching out to others has become a catalyst for some to stroke their egos ..judge and condemn others unfairly and to even attack the natures of those they have never met. Is it any wonder why we do not receive expected results here... What motivates us to feel we can judge others without walking in their shoes...All I know is I am farthest thing from being perfect...I am the last to judge anyone...I feel I have been fortunate here and can say I have had a very good and pleasant experience. For there are so many good people here..people who are generous and open with their love and kindness. There is always something good and positive to learn from others ..I guess I am wondering why not choose to be a light unto the world ..why not be that one candle that reaches out and lights another ..and another..and another. I feel that it is important to understand that our attitude and behavior are important to the out come and results we receive....looking at the world through the eyes of reality is a good and positive thing..this is not a perfect world and there are no perfect people...accepting this and controlling our reactions and behavior is paramount. True happiness is found within us. It is wrong to expect someone else to bring us the happiness we are seeking need and want. I believe if we accept and acknowledge that we are accountable for our own life and our happiness...this is when we truly grow and become all we can be..perhaps by doing this then our dreams will be met. We cannot dodge responsibility for how and why our life is the way it is. If we don't like our jobs, we are accountable. If we are overweight, we are accountable. If we are not happy, we are accountable. We are creating the situations that we are in and the emotions that flow from those situations. When we play the role of victim, or use past events to build excuses. It guarantees us no progress, no healing, and no victory. We will never fix a problem by blaming someone else. It does not matter whether the cards that we have been dealt are good or bad, we are in charge of ourselves now. Every choice we make.. including the thoughts we think .... have consequences. When we choose the behavior or thought, we choose the consequences. If we choose to stay with a destructive partner, then we choose the consequences of pain and suffering. If we choose thoughts contaminated with anger and bitterness, then we will create an experience of alienation and hostility. When we start choosing the right behavior and thoughts.. which will take a lot of discipline.. we will get the right consequences. We need to remember we are in control...be positive ..be happy ...find the strength that lies within you...We need to get real with ourselves about life and everybody in it..We need to be truthful about what isn't working in our lives. We need to stop making excuses and start making results. We need to decide who we are .....we know and experience this world only through the perceptions that we create...We have the ability to choose how we perceive any event in our life ..no matter what the situation, we choose our reaction, assigning meaning and value to an event. By doing this we do not have to be a victim..Instead we will be a victor... Remember that there is power in forgiveness... We must open our eyes to what anger and resentment are doing to us..Hate, anger and resentment are destructive, like a cancer they eat away at the heart and soul of the person who carries them. They are absolutely incompatible with our own peace of mind , our joy and our relaxation..Negative emotions change who we are and contaminate every relationship we have. They also are just plain unhealthy and take a physical toll on our bodies....including sleep disturbance, headaches, back and neck spasms , and heart attacks..remember forgiveness sets us free from the bonds of hatred, anger and resentment. The only way to rise above the negatives of a relationship in which we were hurt is to take the moral high ground, and forgive the person who hurt us. Forgiveness is not about another person who has transgressed against you; it is about you. Forgiveness is about doing whatever it takes to preserve the power to create your own emotional state. It is a gift to yourself and it frees you. You don't have to have the other person's cooperation, and they do not have to be sorry or admit the error of their ways. Do it for yourself. Perhaps if we look within ourselves...take a reality check...perhaps then we will realize that we are the ones who are in control of our own happiness ....... Remember that each one of us hold the power within us to change and to create our own situations...decide what we want ..define our goals make our own choices and to reach out for what we truly want and deserve. Be positive .. be happy...and be complete. Take care.... Posted by southernstarr2006 on 20-MAY-06 [Remove] GeminiDi (Woman,44, Russellville, AL, US ) comments (8) View my blog southernstarr, I am glad you reposted this because it's the first time I've read it. What wonderful insight you have! Thank you for this blog. :-) Posted by GeminiDi on 21-MAY-06 [Remove] [Ban this member] This user is hidden. southernstarr2006 "Angel Girl" No need to be insulted....The Weight Issue is not the Issue..It's all about how we respond. How we judge unfairly how we take control of our own lives. I refuse to get into the thick of all of this.. I simply say we should hold and maintain a positive view and attitude..Why let others define who we are. We are all special and unique in our own way. Why give weight to insults..attacks on our character our person...the way we look don't look..people who insult others are usually very insecure and unhappy individuals.. The important thing is to like who we are. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. This is true. We are all beautiful in our own ways.. It is the inner beauty that truly shines...and no matter what our individual tastes are..or what qualities we look for..it is this beauty that truly wins out. The heart the soul and the spirit..if these are not true or not beautiful then we have nothing. Man or woman.. Take care angel girl ..your beautiful and obviously have a passionate heart... thank you for posting.. Erica Anne.. Posted by southernstarr2006 on 21-MAY-06 [Remove] angelgirl1480 (Woman,38, Millbury, MA, US ) comments (22) View my blog Thats all very nice deary but there are people on this site that are blatently insulting others. WEIGHT, AGE, SOCIAL STATUS, ETC. Frankly one the perps I actually liked, found very talented etc. I have now read enough of the slander to change my opinion. Its pretty sickening. It just keeps getting worse and worse, and they are the ones that keep bringing the issues up! I am responding but am sick to death of it and the insults to these women including myself that are involved. As for the weight issue I am so insulted I will not bother to respond to that comment of yours, for most of the women insulted by the weight issue are in fact not fat, and do not need a diet! A few very good members like Bobby Fisher are hiding. I don't blame them, for I too am about to do the same. I do love the people here, the brain power, etc. What I hate is the bickering and the slander of one another. Posted by angelgirl1480 on 21-MAY-06 [Remove] [Ban this member] This user is hidden. southernstarr2006 S. " Trying again...thank you. I did receive your email..thanks for the encouragement. Let me know if you can see this? Erica Anne
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" Love Is Not Rude " 391 Views 05/21/06
Corinthians reads that LOVE is NOT RUDE.... Tone of voice communicates more than your words....ones whole demeanor..speaks loudly...how you say something is very important...there is NO excuse to be rude.. if you are harsh..rude and unkind it is usually just to make yourself feel good or better.. Proverbs 11:17 YOU DO YOURSELF A FAVOR WHEN YOU ARE KIND A pleasant tone of voice an attitude is paramount in communicating with another individual..one must exude a friendly, respective,polite understanding gentle spirit...one should be polite not rude..understanding not demanding one should be kind and considerate to everyone...this is a test of faith. We should never say things to belittle hurt or demean another person..usually people who do this are very insecure... We should do our best not to make someone feel small or unimportant... We should always be friendly..compliment ..smile and take time for consideration..we need to learn to express our appreciation..and not to take anyone for granted..we should encourage and give our approval..all the while being kind...gentle and understanding... The more authority we have the more humility we should show.. we should remember that power and money can corrupt us and always be aware.. Have you noticed how polite we all can be with our co-workers..friends..everyday people we run across in our everyday lives...we can be more than polite to perfect strangers who may never cross our paths again...than to those closest to us those we hold most dear. Behind closed doors..the real test of character is how we treat those closest to you...your significant other..family..children..wife..husband...we should treat them better than anyone else..but we don't do we... The bible reads..that a man's wife is a reflection of his glory..and how he treats her reflects in her smile..her demeanor..her behavior..and in the way she looks..think for just one moment..if you have a wife ..lover ..or significant other...how does she act..what is her demeanor..does she have an inner glow that radiates from deep within her soul through her eyes...does she smile laugh a lot..is she happy does she feel safe ..content..does she feel secure confident..is she at peace...If not she is not then one is not putting into her what she needs..take a good look of you wife lover or significant other...does she reflect who you are?? Remember she is a reflection of your character.... We should treat those who are closest to us as valuable..We must remember that God has in trusted these love ones to us..for they are a gift from God and should be held precious to us...they need our love and respect.. In First Peter it reads.."Men..if we do not treat our wives with love and respect..our prayers will be hindered' Do not treat your loved ones with harshness or disrespect... Treat People right..being sarcastic rude and disrespectful is not love nor understanding ..If we want to be more persuasive ..be kind..gentle..considerate and respectful to those closest to you...Remember Hard and Harsh behavior..is negative..love and kindness should rule..Be gentle..be grateful..be kind..always express and show your love and gratitude.... Erica Anne
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