True Story from a Medical Center in USA
A man went to the hospital to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis. According to the Nurse attending, the patient's girl friend found the ring in his pants pocket and she got so mad at him, she used petroleum jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.
I don't know what's worse:
1) Having your girl friend find out you're married.
2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.
3) Or finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.
If you have paid for your membership using a credit card, then I advise all paying members to check their credit card statements.
Today, I was checking on a transaction and the person I was talking to just happened to ask me why I was still using my old credit card number. I told him I wasnt'. He then informed me that Millionaire Match attempted to put through $86.38 yesterday. Fortunately, the number is no longer valid and they put a stop on the transaction. Someone has clearly compromised this system, only my number no longer works. I paid only for one month, and my membership is not due to expire until June 8. So MM would not even be attempting to auto-bill me until June 7. Which I have cancelled the auto bill. So check your statements!
For 4 to 5 yrs, my daughter had 2 best girlfriends. They played soccer together, hung out together, and attracted the guys together! lol After being away to school for 4.5 months last Fall, my daughter returned to find her friends had basically ditched her. They say and do hurtful things toward her without consideration for her feelings. No compassion whatsoever, and totally do not take responsibility for the actions.
We're to go on vacation with one family next week. Last evening I had to call the Mother and tell her that I thought after spending entire days together, the girls would probably want to have their space at night, so their daughter should stay in their room, instead of the original plan with myself & my daughter.
We went on to discuss friendships. I commented that last year I thought all these kids (a group of 12) would end up being friends for life. Was I wrong. Sadly, when they graduate in June, I doubt any of these kids will remain friends. She commented that is to be expected, because people go off to University, different career paths, geography. Friends don't last she said. Shocked, I told her that I teach my kids that friends are important. To value their friends, and be there for them when they need you. I went on to say that I have friends from high school. We may only see each other every 5 yrs, but when we get together, it is like no time has passed. She paused and thought, then said she had one friend from when she was little.
I may be sounding "OLD", but now-a-days, kids treat each other with such disrespect and meanness. It's uncanny. The receiver is expected to suck it up, and they do...usually laughing it off on the outside, but on the inside...it's hurtful!
I teach my kids to value their friends. To be there for their friends, and that a true friend will be there for them also. True friends don't insult you, or do hurtful things toward you.
I have been blessed to have some damned GOOD FRIENDS that I have made in high school, and over the past 10 - 20 yrs. After major surgery 3 yrs ago, my friends babysat me for a week, changing my dressing, making sure I took my medication at the right time, helping me to walk, making dinner for my daughter & I that night, picking my daughter up at school daily and driving her home (I live a ways from the school, and from where my friends live). They went above and beyond, as I would do for anyone of them. That's what 'true' friends do for one another.
Am I out to lunch, overthinking this friendship stuff? Do any of you have 'true' friends from high school, university, or just made over the years? Friends that would be there for you? Do you keep in touch with them, even if it is just once a year?
I've been dating a fellow for the past 3 months. We really like each other. He has 3 kids. Two that will have moved out of home next Fall, and one that is 12. So a few years left at home.
Myself, this Fall I'll be a true empty nestor. I had a taste of it for 4 months last Fall, but this year, it's the real deal!
I own my house. It's very nice, on an acreage just 15 minutes to downtown. Prime location! Quick exit from the city also.
The fellow I'm dating lives in a bungalow that is nice enough. He could make it really nice inside to if he wanted. But he doesn't like his house. He's about 30 minutes from downtown where he and everyone in business works. He lives in a nice neighborhood. A 30 minute drive before you get to city limits if you want to go somewhere. His son supposedly doesn't want to move from the area though.
A week ago, I made a comment about last year it really bothered me when my daughter went away for 4 months. This year I'm prepared, and I'm okay with being on my own. Then I added that I had him to keep me company. Well, his comment back to me was that he hoped to more than keep me company. I'm thinking...okay, and wondering what he means by it.
Saturday afternoon he was over to my house and we went for a walk. I have a few corals built around me, which have posts, that the white paint is fading. He started making plans for the two of us to paint them this Spring, as well as, the small out buildings (I never use). Heck, he's going to help me with my gardening (I have tons!!!) all kinds of work around here.
Then yesterday he commented how he was hoping his son would move from the house they were living in, because he didn't really like it. He didn't mention anything about buying a new house, or neighborhood he'd like to move to.
He's told me a few times he really likes my house, yard, location. I have two dogs, a cat, hot tub, privacy...great for kids.
He said he didn't want to put alot of money into his house, because he's thinking he would like to just rent it out.
Now housing prices have gone thru the roof here in the past two years. A year ago, in 6 months properties almost doubled in price. It's nuts!
I don't know. He didn't say it, but it left me feeling that he is working up to possibly moving in with me next Fall, after my daughter moves out. Suddenly, as much as I like him, I'm not sure how I'd feel about that. It seems so soon. My ex and I dated 2.5 yrs before we moved in together. But I'm also turning 47 in a month. Who knows how many years I have left now! lol
On the other hand, his 12 yr son can drive me nuts! He's so noisy all the time, totally contrast to my kids when they were young. He acts more like an 8 yr old than 12 turning 13 soon. In gr 7. He never listens to his father, who is at a loss how to deal with him. It's almost a battle of the wills, only the kid is winning, because he's laughing, and Dad is pissed, but just doesn't know what to do short of beating the kid, which he won't do. I feel stressed when I'm around his son and he isn't listening and doing what he is told. I bite my tongue, but I really feel like telling him to do what he is told for a change, and stop behaving like a spoiled brat.
So my question is...in the event that maybe he is thinking of the prospect of moving in with me next September/October...that's only after 9/10 months of seeing each other (albeit daily)...do you think that's a little fast?
Through good friends, I met a handsome and wonderful man. We have been dating since early January. We're both family oriented, share many interests in activities, travels and financial endeavours. We're extremely compatible, and very happy together.
After a fabulous 4 day ski weekend with our friends, we are already discussing going out in February next year. We've been planning our Summer together.
This weekend he referred to us as a couple. I haven't been looking to meet anyone else since we began dating, and I don't feel inclined to want to meet anyone else now. So I'd say I've met my match ... albeit not on MM.
This morning Jocklawyer asked me why I was still on the site? I replied that I had said I would help with the Vegas trip, and once that was done, I'd be gone. But I realized shortly after, that Puck and Jessica have it well in hand.
I have made and met in person some wonderful people throughout the US, Canada, UK & Europe. We remain friends today. I understand that Healey, Trey & George (thenewman) have all met from this site and become friends.
Boopster, Statuesque4U and LivelynClassy have all met and become friends from this site. If you are open, MM has potential to benefit you as more than a dating site. You may meet alot of new friends in your quest to find your perfect match. One can never have too many friends.
I've been posting on the forums or the blogs for the past 3 yrs now. It's become a habit, which has been enjoyable when everyone is getting along, and there is laughter, flirting, joking & teasing happening. It's time for me to break this habit.
I wish you all good luck in finding that which you are seeking in life. It is different for each of us.
Most of all I wish you happiness and love. May you meet your perfect match to love and laugh with.
Congrats Rob 'n Linda...one of MM's success stories. I know of one other success. A couple who have been together for a year now, and are still doing well.
My membership will expire soon I think, at which time I will delete my profile for good. That should ensure I will not be tempted to pop back on and post my opinion.
I bid you all adieu. Take care.
Thursday I was in Palm Springs and it was sunny and 85F. Friday my daughter and I decided to drive for the day to Orange County to go shopping. O.C. was only 100 miles away and in CA too, so naturally we dressed in Summer tanks and skirts. It was freezing! 65F. A sales clerk asked me if it had warmed up...not likely, we had to buy sweaters!
Saturday it was around 90F...gorgeous...Sunday mid 80's again...Arrived home Sunday to 65F...a nice temperature for this time of year...When you are dressed for it! It was 65F again yesterday...balmy. Today it is around 26F and there is a 6 inch blanket of snow on the ground and covering the trees. Giant snowflakes were falling until about 15 minutes ago...it was beautiful. So serene. Now it is even more beautiful as there is now blue sky and the sun is shining brightly across the snow. Very pristine. I love days like this, even if the temperature isn't in the 80's!
THE HUSBAND STORE
A brand new store has just opened in London that sells Husbands.
When women go to choose a husband, they have to follow the instructions
at the entrance: "You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are 6 floors
and the values of the products increase as you ascend the flights. You may
choose any item from a particular floor or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you CANNOT go back down except to exit the
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.
On the 1st floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men have jobs.
The 2nd floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
The 3rd floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely good looking.
"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the 4th floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help with Housework.
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework and Have A
Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay.. But she goes to the 6th floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no
men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are
impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opens a New Wives store just across the street.
The 1st floor has wives that love sex.
The 2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money.
The 3rd - 6th floors have never been visited.
I was in Beijing mid January for pleasure. It was my first trip to Asia. You know I found that for all that China seems to disagree with the US in UN and trade matters, it is a country that desires to be like and have all the prosperity and material comforts of the US. There almost seems to be a little jealousy there, which in turn can cause resentment. I guess what can happen on a micro scale can also happen on the macro scale.
China has along ways to go, but it is transpiring daily.
I was told young women purchase makeup to lighten their faces like caucasions. Some go to the extreme to have surgery to change their eyes to be more like caucasions. This really surprised me. Apparently they consider caucasions to be more beautiful. I think every culture has their share of beautiful people. I told our tour guide, a 24 yr female, that we caucasions lay in the sun to tan our skin to be darker. lol I also told her that Chinese people in Canada and US never try to lighten their faces with makeup...or surgery to change their eyes.
There are no old vehicles on the roads. They are all new, as people are experiencing more individual economic prosperity. At least within the cities.
China will be hosting the 2008 Summer Olympics. I had read about all the changes occurring, that if one did not see China prior to the end of 2005, they would not know what 'old' China was about.
I think I still saw a bit of the 'old' China, but new highway construction, and new office buildings (I saw at least 15) are being built rapidly. I don't know who will fill those office buildings, but I'm sure with China's advancement in World trade the before or during the Olympics they will have found viable businesses to occupy them.
I learned alot about China while listening to the Asia CNN news. Their people live under very strict laws, and do not have the liberties we have as Canadians and Americans. Maybe it is due to their being unaware of their lack of liberties, I don't know, but they are very very proud of their Country, as Americans and Canadians are proud of our Countries.
Considering we are countries that seemingly want the same things, only some countries are a little more advanced in these areas...it is too bad that we can not all come together, work together, and get along for world wide peace.
We have alot to learn about each others cultures. When we understand, we are able to get along better.
Okay, I'm curious. When male/female read a profile of someone who claims he/she was eagerly searching for a nice lady/man who wanted to be treated kindly, pampered, and would like to be taken care of!!! Doesn't want to be taken advantage of. Wants to be appreciated for their kindness and everything they will do for you. The skies the limit what they'll to for you to make you happy. If they like you. They are a great listener, can keep a secret, which makes them a great confident. They are very honest, and won't tell you things that are not true....doesn't play games and if they find that they like you, they won't take three days before calling you....
Then they goes on to state their beliefs: romance, holding hands in public, treating a you with respect. Plus they are very generous, old fashioned, if a man, he opens the door for ladies (car too), and pulling her chair out at a fine restaurant, and standing up when she arrives back to the table.
He believes in the small of a women's back, and long slow deep kisses that last for days and days. He/she likes treating a man/woman like a "King/Queen".
Finally they want someone who knows how to reciprocate all this and love unconditionally.
OK...LADIES/GENTLEMEN...when you read a profile such as this (whether by a male or female), how does it make you feel about that person? Do you make a judgment of that person?
I am not usually a judgemental person, but I do. It makes me wonder why a man/woman must list ALL the things they are going to do for you...to the extreme. It's like they know what buttons to push and are saying all the right things that a man/woman want to hear, because those people are dreaming of the perfect soulmate. It's their dream come true.
It makes me suspicious. You see, I think all the things listed are a given, and need not be spoken. They should be innate, flowing naturally. So when someone has a need to spell it out...it makes me think...red flag, player, probably the opposite of what they claim in their profile.
Is it just me? Am I too suspicious? What are your thoughts?
Courtesy of a former member of MM...
The Real Meaning of St. Valentines Day...
It should be exposed that Valentine's Day was originally concocted by the Christian Church to ruin the festival of Lupercalia (named after the Roman God Lupercus) which was held on the 15th of February and continued throughout the month.
Lupercus, was the God of Wolves. I know you thought that was George W. Bush, but that's the God of Fox. I know - its confusing.
Lupercalia was a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman God of Agriculture, (the date in February was originally chosen to welcome spring) and to the Roman founders Romulus and Remus commemorating young men's rite of passage.
To begin the festival, members of the Luperci, an order of Roman priests, would gather at a sacred cave where the infants Romulus and Remus, were originally discovered happily staying alive by suckling a "lupa" (a she-wolf - think Ann Coulter).
The priests would then sacrifice a goat, for fertility, and a dog, for purification because apparently with all those priests around, there were no pure goats.
The young men would then slice the goat's leather hide into strips, dip them in the sacrificial blood and take to the streets, slapping both women and, as the story goes, fields of crops with the goat-hide strips. Okay, a lot more women, than fields, were being spanked with these goat-strips, but this wasn't a bad thing.
Roman women welcomed being touched with the hides because it was believed the strips would make them more fertile in the coming year...or at least more popular at Roman parties.
Later in the day, a lottery was held where all the young women in the city would place their names in a big urn and the city's bachelors would then each choose a name out of the urn and the girl would be the sexual partner of the young man for a year.
Now THIS was a lottery! You can imagine how crowded the liquor and 7-Eleven stores were. Everyone's a winner!
Okay, except for the goat and the dog, but there weren't any special interest groups back then.
Except for the ultimate self interest group, the Church.
In 498 A.D. Pope Gelasius of the Christian Church declared the celebration a pagan holiday, because it was fun, and decided to christianize the hell out of it. He did this by creating a "misinformation" celebration on the day before the festival of Lupercalia, February 14th, in the hopes of confusing the entire matter.
Instead of the names of young women, the urn would contain the names of Christian Saints and the young men and women were to emulate the ways of the saint they picked from the urn for a year.
Way to kill a holiday.
So much for the Lupercalia festival. The Christian church now needed a new holiday "mascot" to coordinate with the date they needed and found one in Saint Valentinus. But Saint Valentinus was a virgin and knew nothing of romance. This fact would hinder the effort to confuse the celebrations. Not to mention if anybody should have been celebrating Lupercalia, it was this guy.
The Christian church knew this wouldn't fly and created an elaborate story about Valentinus and love.
Oh those Christians and their elaborate stories.
So now you've got Valentinus, an anti-lover chosen to be the propaganda machine's namesake of a lover's holiday that wasn't created to be a lover's holiday but rather was invented to demolish a sexual holiday.
And it worked. Because we're all crazy.
I hope this blog shows up as my membership expired earlier than I expected!
Anyways, thenewman asked me to initiate a new thread denoting the set date for the Vegas gathering. I noticed DoeVixen has already broken the news in the voting blog.
Well, the voting is done. The dates selected is April 5 - 8. The gathering will be held in Las Vegas. Everyone is welcome. The more the merrier.
I have to let everyone know now that myself and thenewman are unable to make it to Vegas. But DoeVixen will definitely be there.
I'm not sure if DebbieinItaly was planning on going, but if so, Deb would you like to assist DoeVixen with coordinating people when in Vegas? I'm sure she'd love the help. I hope you don't feel I'm putting you on the spot, but you were doing a great job when assisting Michael for the DR trip.
No monies will be collected from people. With group dinner, everyone will be responsible for their own food and drinks tab...unless someone offers to pay for you. :-))
Accommodations will also be up to individuals to make on their own. Past experience has shown that men tend to like to get their own rooms, and women like to have roommates (other females!!! sorry guys! lol) So any women wanting to go, and would like a roommate or two, speak up and we will try to hook you up, or you can make your own arrangements.
So that everyone can keep in contact, a list of cell phone numbers, names and hotels everyone is staying at will be created and given out to those going.
Once we have an idea of everyone going, we'll plan a more detailed agenda.
So on this thread...please state here whether you are definitely planning on attending this gathering so we can get a serious head count.
I'm a little disgusted with MM. It seems they do not give a shit about their paying members. You see earlier this week I received a very defamatory and profane comment on my profile, from rhoadma whom I have never corresponded with. He had checked my profile out, so I checked his profile out, and the next day I receive this disgusting message!
So I wrote to MM and informed them I wanted it deleted, as well, this rhoadma had breached their agreement, and his profile should be deleted. They replied they had deleted the comment, and that this profile was in breach of their agreement.
His profile remained. So I wrote again and said clearly he had breached his agreement, and his profile should be removed. They wrote back telling me I needed proof! So I emailed them a copy of his comment and a copy of their own email to me stating their own findings! Below is their reply:
Thanks for the tip. We have removed the user you mentioned after investigation. We have determined that the user has violated our service agreement. If you have any suggestion on our services, feel free to let us know.
GUESS WHAT??? This profile still exists.
I have been a paying member for 2 yrs. This guy is a non-paying member... Doesn't it seem more prudent to value the paying member over the non-paying member?
I know this is perfectly normal and acceptable today. Young girls do it all the time.
But I'm not from that generation! I'm more reserved & conservative.
A few weeks ago, a couple of good friends of mine (a very happily married couple of 25 yrs) suggested to me that I date one of her co-workers, who I have met several times over the past 2 yrs at parties. Initially I thought, no. Then I thought..."he is tall, dark, handsome". lol So I asked my friend if she had invited him to her Xmas party. She replied, "No, but she would."
My friend's Christmas party was last Saturday night. This fellow came. We talked for 2 hrs just the 2 of us. Then another 2 hrs with other people...he could have left my side at anytime, but did not.
When I was leaving my friend ran up to me and excitedly commented, "well things seemed to go very well...do you want me to give you his phone number?" I didn't think I could do that, so suggested she give him mine. She replied, "Then he'll know we talked about him." I said, "Good point, let me think about it."
The next day I decided to be brave...I'll get his phone number. Well, she didn't have his phone number, but gave me his last name to look it up in the phone book, which I did. There was only one in the book, so I called that number. Oh God! His ex answered and told me he hadn't lived there in a very long time! lol
The next day it occurred to me that my phone book is at least 2 yrs old.
My friend told me he was out of town, & would be back in the office Thursday.
Thursday morning...I call him at work. I am nervous as hell! I tell him who I am, then my mind goes blank! I try to remember what my friend told me to say...something about "I enjoyed our conversation and thought maybe we could go to a movie together sometime." it sounded a little hokey to me, but it was something! lol
I start to say what she told me...I was tripping over my words...sounding like a stuttering, blustering, babbling idiot!
I remember saying, "This is awkward." "I'm a little nervous. I've never done this before." Then, "Hold on." I take a deep breathe, "Okay, I'll start over." lol He said, "Yes, that sounded great and would love to go out with me."
Whew! What a relief. With the fear of rejection out of the way, after the first 2 minutes, we enjoyed a pleasant conversation for another 10 minutes at least!
I have to commend you guys...it is NOT easy to call someone up and ask them out.
Fortunately, this fellow said he'd call me next time. That's good, because I don't think I could do this twice! LOL I was practically having an anxiety attack!
It's a good thing we've had other conversations over the last 2 yrs...he knows I can actually speak intelligently. Otherwise, he would have thought I was mentally obtuse and hung up! lol
With Xmas and our family schedules, it will be the 1st week of January before we have our first date...barring he doesn't get run over by a truck, fall off a cliff, break a leg skiing, or get cold feet! lol
So ladies, having been on the asking end for the first time, it's tough and nerve racking. So remember to be nice, even if you are telling him, "No thank you." Let him down gently!
Are there ever times in your life that something completely crazy has happened to you? If so, do you consider it to be a funny story to share with people and make them laugh? Or do you consider it a complete embarrassment and would never tell anyone, because you are afraid it will make you look stupid?
Today I received an email from an MM member telling me they know of the perfect match for me. Then supplied me with their email, and told me to write them.
Initially I thought it is the person writing to me, and he is just giving me his personal email in hopes that I'll write back to him directly. But why would he need to do that if he can already email me through the site? Confused in Calgary! lol
Would you email someone based on a recommendation from a stranger you know nothing about?
It's about time! Women for years have been burdened with the responsibility of a contraceptive. That weight gaining pill! I won't list the many others, because this thread is about the new upcoming MEN'S Contraceptive.
It's the Sperm Stopper!!! Just a little molecule called Adjudin blocks the connection between developing sperm and another cell that nurtures their growth.
Tests in rats showed the developing sperm cells were not able to mature properly, and the loss of fertility was temporary.
That should make guys happy, their wives won't be asking them to get snipped! lol And guys, those who want to reverse the procedure... Well, easy as pie, Just quit using the contraceptive! lol
Even better for you guys, the doctors want to make it easier for you (probably because most doctors are male! lol) instead of contraceptive by injection, it will come in the form of the PATCH!
So keep your eyes peeled for the Sperm Stopping Patch in coming years! Finally! What a weight lifted off our shoulders ladies, don't you think? lol
As some people know, my daughter is presently sailing around the World taking her gr 12. Back at Xmas.
Prior to her leaving, her bf committed himself to waiting for her return. That kind of blew her away, because although she liked him alot, I don't think she was thinking a life time relationship here. She told him then that he could date other people, but he insisted he wanted to wait for her only. This was her 2nd bf, his 1st girlfriend. He was a guy who for 6 mos. claimed he didn't want a gf, because he didn't want to be committed to one person, but found himself 'in love' I guess with my daughter. He's a nice guy, mature, 95% average...knows what he wants in life, and will have the pick of Universities to attend. He'll be a great catch one day, as will my daughter. :-) I like him alot, have a great rapport with him. So this is even awkward for me.
Okay, she's been away 2 mos. and has determined she doesn't miss him. She doesn't want to lead him on, and have him continue waiting for her. She contemplated writing him an email (she can only do when in a port for 4 days) to break it off, and remain friends. But one of her girlfriends yesterday told her not to email him, because apparently one of his best friends was razzing him 3 days ago about my daughter and he beat him up badly, and choked him until he passed out. Oh Boy! I told her...don't email him yet, I need to think about this. I'll get back to you as to what to do. Now I usually have a best friend, male, who I ask such advice. Unfortunately, he is inconveniently out of the country for a couple of weeks.
So I'm asking advice from the guys here...what should I be telling my daughter. I just spoke to her this afternoon Oct. 28. They set sail this afternoon for their next port. I will talk to her in 2 or 3 days. Does she email him now, or wait till she returns at Xmas? That is a lousy time to breakup. ADVICE NEEDED...and guys...you would know what you would want...so spill. Because Men and Women do think differently, which is why I need a guy's perspective here.
And I thought I was the only one she posted a nasty, evil personal note too.
She said I look like a "painted clown." I could say what I think SHE/HE looks like, but I am too much of a lady for that....
Are you a person who just loves going to Tropical resorts where you are catered to, and everyday can just lay on the beach soaking up the sun and do nothing?
Or do you enjoy more adventurous vacations...biking through Vietnam, Tuscany, etc.?
Maybe you are cruiseship material or enjoy a more private yacht charter through the Virgin Islands or Mediterranean.
Let us know what your favorite type of vacation is, places, and the things you've done. Anyone do anything really unique? It can be a trip from your past. Do share!