40-ish = 49 Adventurous = Slept with everyone Athletic = No boobs Average looking = Ugly, can only be loved by mommy Beautiful = Pathological liar, airhead Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills Emotionally Secure = On medication Feminist = Fat, hates men Free Spirit = Junkie Friendship first = Former very “friendly” person Fun = Annoying New Age = Body hair in the wrong places Open Minded = Desperate Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing Passionate = Sloppy Drunk Professional = Bitch Voluptuous = Very Fat Large Frame = Hugely Fat Needs soul mate = Stalker
An okay-looking guy was using a fake online-dating account.
After a few weeks of looking, a girl finally agrees to go grab a coffee with him.
She says she will wear something Yellow, he says he will wear something Green.
At a relatively empty coffee shop, the guy shows up wearing Red instead.
After a few minutes of waiting, an ugly girl shows up wearing something Yellow.
Seeing that an okay-looking guy in Red is sitting alone, she comes up to him and asks him, "Hi, by any chance are you the guy from the online-dating website?"
The guy responds, "No I'm not! Does it look like I'm wearing Green??"
All in good fun!!
What it really means:
40-ish = 49 Adventurous = Slept with everyone Athletic = No boobs Average looking = Ugly, can only be loved by mommy Beautiful = Pathological liar, airhead Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills Emotionally Secure = On medication Feminist = Fat, hates men Free Spirit = Junkie Friendship first = Former very “friendly” person Fun = Annoying New Age = Body hair in the wrong places Open Minded = Desperate Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing Passionate = Sloppy Drunk Professional = Bitch Voluptuous = Very Fat Large Frame = Hugely Fat Needs soul mate = Stalker
An okay-looking guy was using a fake online-dating account.
After a few weeks of looking, a girl finally agrees to go grab a coffee with him.
She says she will wear something Yellow, he says he will wear something Green.
At a relatively empty coffee shop, the guy shows up wearing Red instead.
After a few minutes of waiting, an ugly girl shows up wearing something Yellow.
Seeing that an okay-looking guy in Red is sitting alone, she comes up to him and asks him, "Hi, by any chance are you the guy from the online-dating website?"
The guy responds, "No I'm not! Does it look like I'm wearing Green??"
MM staff here deleted my explanation of - BBDiapers: Be Open Minded.
This was the big headline on his profile. If I try explaining further, it will probably get deleted again. Clearly he wants to literally be a baby in his spare time.
The bottom line is I have come across too many people who have a fetish or are otherwise kinky about something that is undesireable to most normal people. I would rather NOT have to discuss this stuff with a stranger before you even talk on the phone but now it is an unfortunite priority to find out sooner than later so we don't waste each other's time.
He does not have a baby,lol. This guy must have one of those fetishes where he likes to be like a baby and wear a diaper. For the record; I want a man, NOT a baby!
So OPEN-MINDED could mean something else besides DESPERATE, it also means kinky. Be open minded about my kinky behavior. To that I say, No thank-you!!
Seeing this today only added to my single lady doldrums.
MM staff here deleted my explanation of - BBDiapers: Be Open Minded.
This was the big headline on his profile. If I try explaining further, it will probably get deleted again. Clearly he wants to literally be a baby in his spare time.
The bottom line is I have come across too many people who have a fetish or are otherwise kinky about something that is undesireable to most normal people. I would rather NOT have to discuss this stuff with a stranger before you even talk on the phone but now it is an unfortunite priority to find out sooner than later so we don't waste each other's time.
He does not have a baby,lol. This guy must have one of those fetishes where he likes to be like a baby and wear a diaper. For the record; I want a man, NOT a baby!
So OPEN-MINDED could mean something else besides DESPERATE, it also means kinky. Be open minded about my kinky behavior. To that I say, No thank-you!!
Seeing this today only added to my single lady doldrums.
"Tats or no tats-- if someone is a LIAR-- RUN SCOOBY RUN!!!" End of quote.
The following just happened about a week ago to a friend of mine. They meet online a few months ago, they seem to immediately fall in love. He's in the military and has to leave on a short mission so he's gone for the holidays and she is missing him on Christmas , NYE, etc. She can't wait for him to come back!!
Well.. on facebook she posts something like, "why do men always have to lie?" This didn't sound good so we had a chat. This guy who she had dreams about a future with him..his "mission" was him visiting his wife and kids for the holidays!! They are suppose to be getting a divorce!
Somehow she found out the truth. Since we chatted I don't know what happened since but at the time, she didn't know what she was going to do. She didn't immediately break up with him!! I would have kicked him to the curb. That is one HUGE LIE!
And Dakota, I don't blame you at all, we all have preferences and there are some things that just bug us or turn us off. When I see a guy with a crooked nose severely off to one side. I feel like taking it firmly in my hand and doing a swift crack and putting it back in place. lol. I won't even mention the protruding, pointy Adam's Apples that moves up and down when they laugh, ewww! Okay...I just mentioned it. lol
Hopingforlove posted:
"Tats or no tats-- if someone is a LIAR-- RUN SCOOBY RUN!!!" End of quote.
The following just happened about a week ago to a friend of mine. They meet online a few months ago, they seem to immediately fall in love. He's in the military and has to leave on a short mission so he's gone for the holidays and she is missing him on Christmas , NYE, etc. She can't wait for him to come back!!
Well.. on facebook she posts something like, "why do men always have to lie?" This didn't sound good so we had a chat. This guy who she had dreams about a future with him..his "mission" was him visiting his wife and kids for the holidays!! They are suppose to be getting a divorce!
Somehow she found out the truth. Since we chatted I don't know what happened since but at the time, she didn't know what she was going to do. She didn't immediately break up with him!! I would have kicked him to the curb. That is one HUGE LIE!
And Dakota, I don't blame you at all, we all have preferences and there are some things that just bug us or turn us off. When I see a guy with a crooked nose severely off to one side. I feel like taking it firmly in my hand and doing a swift crack and putting it back in place. lol. I won't even mention the protruding, pointy Adam's Apples that moves up and down when they laugh, ewww! Okay...I just mentioned it. lol
Lulu...great definitions! Ever since I read this I've been giggling my way through most of the profiles I've seen. I'm a very visual reader, and once a seed is planted, you can't imagine the images it paints as I read along! Thanks for a fun read that appears will stick in my mind for a very long time. Bwhahahahaha!
Dakota...I agree with you, piercings are not pleasing to look at. I once worked in a place that had to hold the world record for tattooed women. In the summer they wore knee-length pants and their legs (as well as arms and most other visible body parts) looked more like coloring book pages than appendages. Every one of them I questioned about the tats had a story about why they did it. Sad, really, to think something that effects our lives so deeply and painfully has to be displayed as cheap-looking body art.
There are some tats that don't look that bad if done by a true artist, but I'm not a big fan of covering every part of your body with them. And it takes a well-sculpted body to pull off even the nicest tats.
Oh well...to each his own.
Lulu...great definitions! Ever since I read this I've been giggling my way through most of the profiles I've seen. I'm a very visual reader, and once a seed is planted, you can't imagine the images it paints as I read along! Thanks for a fun read that appears will stick in my mind for a very long time. Bwhahahahaha!
Dakota...I agree with you, piercings are not pleasing to look at. I once worked in a place that had to hold the world record for tattooed women. In the summer they wore knee-length pants and their legs (as well as arms and most other visible body parts) looked more like coloring book pages than appendages. Every one of them I questioned about the tats had a story about why they did it. Sad, really, to think something that effects our lives so deeply and painfully has to be displayed as cheap-looking body art.
There are some tats that don't look that bad if done by a true artist, but I'm not a big fan of covering every part of your body with them. And it takes a well-sculpted body to pull off even the nicest tats.
Jenkneee, I'm with you on the Tattoos thing. (I am probably less tolerable) I also hate the piercings. Ears are okay (for me) and I might over-look a belly button piercing, but that's it for me. I see a hole in the nose, lip, or eyebrow and I just say "nope".
Just my preference, not trying to offend any of the body graffiti/pagan/"this is why I got it or did it" people out there, that want to be like everyone else. I just chose to be different.
Quoting Jenkneee:
I talked to this guy for 3 hours the other night. He said more than once how honesty was important to him. So important that he has a tattoo mentioning it. His tattoo also says "Respect is earned". When we talked he only had one photo posted on his profile and from prior experience I have learned to be cautious with one-photo guys so I asked him to please post some more photos. Well he did the next day, turns out he totally lied, the photo he previously had on his profile wasn't even him. Obviously he didn't earn any respect from me and honesty is only a one-way street that he expects from others.
He also failed to mention on his profile that he has 3 kids from 2 women and was divorced (twice) and therefore not "single". I have to wonder what else he left out! A sidenote- I hate tattoos although I can tolerate a few depending on location,etc.. Here is a pic. of some of his tattoos. The photo turned out to be small so I will add that it says "Honesty is appreciated".
Quoting Jenkneee:
I talked to this guy for 3 hours the other night. He said more than once how honesty was important to him. So important that he has a tattoo mentioning it. His tattoo also says "Respect is earned". When we talked he only had one photo posted on his profile and from prior experience I have learned to be cautious with one-photo guys so I asked him to please post some more photos. Well he did the next day, turns out he totally lied, the photo he previously had on his profile wasn't even him. Obviously he didn't earn any respect from me and honesty is only a one-way street that he expects from others.
He also failed to mention on his profile that he has 3 kids from 2 women and was divorced (twice) and therefore not "single". I have to wonder what else he left out! A sidenote- I hate tattoos although I can tolerate a few depending on location,etc.. Here is a pic. of some of his tattoos. The photo turned out to be small so I will add that it says "Honesty is appreciated".
Jenkneee, I'm with you on the Tattoos thing. (I am probably less tolerable) I also hate the piercings. Ears are okay (for me) and I might over-look a belly button piercing, but that's it for me. I see a hole in the nose, lip, or eyebrow and I just say "nope".
Just my preference, not trying to offend any of the body graffiti/pagan/"this is why I got it or did it" people out there, that want to be like everyone else. I just chose to be different.
I talked to this guy for 3 hours the other night. He said more than once how honesty was important to him. So important that he has a tattoo mentioning it. His tattoo also says "Respect is earned". When we talked he only had one photo posted on his profile and from prior experience I have learned to be cautious with one-photo guys so I asked him to please post some more photos. Well he did the next day, turns out he totally lied, the photo he previously had on his profile wasn't even him. Obviously he didn't earn any respect from me and honesty is only a one-way street that he expects from others.
He also failed to mention on his profile that he has 3 kids from 2 women and was divorced (twice) and therefore not "single". I have to wonder what else he left out! A sidenote- I hate tattoos although I can tolerate a few depending on location,etc.. Here is a pic. of some of his tattoos. The photo turned out to be small so I will add that it says "Honesty is appreciated".
I talked to this guy for 3 hours the other night. He said more than once how honesty was important to him. So important that he has a tattoo mentioning it. His tattoo also says "Respect is earned". When we talked he only had one photo posted on his profile and from prior experience I have learned to be cautious with one-photo guys so I asked him to please post some more photos. Well he did the next day, turns out he totally lied, the photo he previously had on his profile wasn't even him. Obviously he didn't earn any respect from me and honesty is only a one-way street that he expects from others.
He also failed to mention on his profile that he has 3 kids from 2 women and was divorced (twice) and therefore not "single". I have to wonder what else he left out! A sidenote- I hate tattoos although I can tolerate a few depending on location,etc.. Here is a pic. of some of his tattoos. The photo turned out to be small so I will add that it says "Honesty is appreciated".
40-ish = 49 Adventurous = Slept with everyone Athletic = No boobs Average looking = Ugly, can only be loved by mommy Beautiful = Pathological liar, airhead Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills Emotionally Secure = On medication Feminist = Fat, hates men Free Spirit = Junkie Friendship first = Former very “friendly” person Fun = Annoying New Age = Body hair in the wrong places Open Minded = Desperate Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing Passionate = Sloppy Drunk Professional = Bitch Voluptuous = Very Fat Large Frame = Hugely Fat Needs soul mate = Stalker
An okay-looking guy was using a fake online-dating account.
After a few weeks of looking, a girl finally agrees to go grab a coffee with him.
She says she will wear something Yellow, he says he will wear something Green.
At a relatively empty coffee shop, the guy shows up wearing Red instead.
After a few minutes of waiting, an ugly girl shows up wearing something Yellow.
Seeing that an okay-looking guy in Red is sitting alone, she comes up to him and asks him, "Hi, by any chance are you the guy from the online-dating website?"
The guy responds, "No I'm not! Does it look like I'm wearing Green??"
Quoting RealtorLulu:
All in good fun!!
What it really means:
40-ish = 49 Adventurous = Slept with everyone Athletic = No boobs Average looking = Ugly, can only be loved by mommy Beautiful = Pathological liar, airhead Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills Emotionally Secure = On medication Feminist = Fat, hates men Free Spirit = Junkie Friendship first = Former very “friendly” person Fun = Annoying New Age = Body hair in the wrong places Open Minded = Desperate Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing Passionate = Sloppy Drunk Professional = Bitch Voluptuous = Very Fat Large Frame = Hugely Fat Needs soul mate = Stalker
An okay-looking guy was using a fake online-dating account.
After a few weeks of looking, a girl finally agrees to go grab a coffee with him.
She says she will wear something Yellow, he says he will wear something Green.
At a relatively empty coffee shop, the guy shows up wearing Red instead.
After a few minutes of waiting, an ugly girl shows up wearing something Yellow.
Seeing that an okay-looking guy in Red is sitting alone, she comes up to him and asks him, "Hi, by any chance are you the guy from the online-dating website?"
The guy responds, "No I'm not! Does it look like I'm wearing Green??"
With all the animosity that the blogs are seeing these days I though we needed something to make us laugh.
One day a man was walking along the beach and found a bottle. He looked around and didn't see anyone so he opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out
The genie said, "For your kindness I will grant you a wish, but only one." The man thought for a minute and said, "I have always wanted to visit Hawaii but have never been able to because I'm afraid of flying and ships make me seasick. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii."
The genie thought for a minute and said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved: the pilings needed to hold up the highway, how deep they would have to be to reach the bottom of the ocean. Think of all the pavement that would be needed. No, that is just too much to ask."
The man thought for a minute and then told the genie, "Well, there is one other thing that I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand my girlfriend. What makes her laugh and cry, why is she temperamental, why is she so difficult to get along with? Basically, what makes her tick?"
The genie considered for a few minutes and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?"
Hope!!!!!!!
Good to see you back!
With all the animosity that the blogs are seeing these days I though we needed something to make us laugh.
One day a man was walking along the beach and found a bottle. He looked around and didn't see anyone so he opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out
The genie said, "For your kindness I will grant you a wish, but only one." The man thought for a minute and said, "I have always wanted to visit Hawaii but have never been able to because I'm afraid of flying and ships make me seasick. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii."
The genie thought for a minute and said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved: the pilings needed to hold up the highway, how deep they would have to be to reach the bottom of the ocean. Think of all the pavement that would be needed. No, that is just too much to ask."
The man thought for a minute and then told the genie, "Well, there is one other thing that I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand my girlfriend. What makes her laugh and cry, why is she temperamental, why is she so difficult to get along with? Basically, what makes her tick?"
The genie considered for a few minutes and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?"
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