#1 Dating Site for Successful Singles and Admirers
Millionaire Blogs > Orlando__'s blogs > Do Nice Guys Finish Last?
Do Nice Guys Finish Last? Sort by:
Author
Orlando__
Certified Millionaire
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 128
Posted on Sun, Jul 07, 2013 12:13

Do "bad boys" get the girls? Do "nice guys" finish last?

Work by Rebellon and Manasse have found that "bad boys" indeed do get the girls (in the teenage years).  As they stated, "delinquency serves to increase romantic involvement."  The preference for "bad boys" starts early on with females.  This research, however, is based on teenagers.  But what of women and not teenagers?


The answer depends, in part, on sex.  Trapnell and Meston found that "nice guys" who were modest, agreeable, and unselfish were disadvantaged in sexual relationships. Men who were manipulative, arrogant, calculating, and sly were more sexually active and had a greater variety of sexual experiences and a greater number of sex partners. Herold and Milhausen found in their study of university women that the "bad boys" were preferred over the "nice guys" if the woman was interested in sex. As they stated, "bad boys tend to be more sexually successful" than "nice guys" who were regularly viewed as "less sexually successful."  In addition, they found women that did go for the "bad boys" wanted them temporarily for sex but eventually wanted the "nice guys" for "committed relationships." 


So, it appears the stereotype is true.  Bad boys get the girls in bed and nice guys finish last.


Sources:

Herold, E. S., & Milhausen, R. R. (1999). Dating preferences of university women: An analysis of the nice guy stereotype. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 25(4), 333-343.

Rebellon, C. J., & Manasse, M. (2004). Do “bad boys” really get the girls? Delinquency as a cause and consequence of dating behavior among adolescents. Justice Quarterly, 21(2), 355-389.

Trapnell, P.D., & Meston, C.M. (1996, August). Sex and the big five: Nice guys finish last. Poster presented at the American Psychological Association Annual Convention, Toronto, ON, Canada.



**My top strength is"learning." So, my blogs are learning-focused. ~Orlando

Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
fourwindsofaz
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 6
Posted on Tue, Oct 01, 2013 06:04

 

nice guys dont have the reputation of being sexual predators but that doesnt mean that they are not sexually assertive and theres a huge difference between being a nice guy and a man who lacks confidence.

a nice guy can attract any woman he wants if he makes himself attractive  to the woman he wants, he is confident, not afraid of and can hold his own in a confrontation with other men , knows how to treat a woman like a lady and is able to verbally communicate his desire for her, not to pressure her, but to make her aware how desireable she is.

as for the nice girl, it all depends on what kind of guy you want to attract - how you dress - how you carry yourself, your self confidence, everything about you can also determine a mans confidence in being able to approach you -

the wording of bad guy gets the girl in bed and nice guy finishes last, reminds me of those movies where nerd likes cheerleader girl who is going out with jock - jock is always beating up nerd if hes seen talking to his girl - these young men are physically and aggressively opposites (no offense intended with use of nerd/jock terminology)

i dont think anyone is finishing last, we are all still learning how to attract a mate

Good luck  =)



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 2
Posted on Mon, Sep 30, 2013 13:24

So basically all guys are shallow and jerks????



0 up Bookmark and Share
Pedestrian2000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 10
Posted on Sun, Sep 22, 2013 10:45

Quoting Diana3316:

Greenkindeyes,

 

"men are so fed up they refuse to be vulnerable". 

 

Wow...that is so right!  Some of the stories men tell me about of what women have done to them...frankly I am kinda ashamed for the women.  One man told me, he gave a woman his credit card to go buy a few things for her new apartment....and she spent $20,000....in one day!  She maxed the card out.  Are you kidding me???



So it's true, what women really want is...Conan the Librarian. Well...don't they ?



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
EbonyT2000
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1
Posted on Sun, Sep 22, 2013 10:14

Every woman wants a man they know will protect them. for girls in there teen years we dont realize its not so much the bad behavior thats attracting us but the fact of knowing if anything was to happen, this boy will have our backs weather we are right or wrong.

The nice boys on the other hand avoid confrentation at all costs and dont seem to have a back bone and thats what we dont like about them. There too nice.

As we get older we now see that the action we like is present in this "bad boy" that protector side of him but the very thing were attracted to is what ultimatly keeps him apart from us. Now because of his behavior he spends his time in jail. Its not untill we become adults that we learn its not the "bad Boy" we want but a man that will be there for us, protect, and provide but not in a way that will keep him behind bars.

So yes nice guys do finish last but its not the begingin of the story that matters its the ending.



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    1 up Bookmark and Share
Tarkin1
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1
Posted on Wed, Sep 04, 2013 12:50

I think there are several issues here.

First, not all 'nice guys' are nice guys.  Some are just scared jerks.

Second, a true nice guy does NOT really want to live like the jerks.   He would rather date one woman a year than one woman a week.,

Third, women are just as shallow as men.   While men lust after pretty airheads, women lust after suave jerks.   It's part of our nature.

Fourth, the nice guys are also shallow.  If we downgraded our  own expectations for beauty, we could date more often.  The suave jerk guys often suceed by dating women they consider 'beneath them', which is part of the reason they treat those women so poorly.

 

 



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    1 up Bookmark and Share
rmac22
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 809
Posted on Mon, Sep 02, 2013 08:03

Quoting onlyluvmatters:

Just my take on the above conversation......Bad guys go out and hunt the buffalo or mamouth and the chances of his survival are greater than if he is a gentle man. aka 'nice guy'  so naturally the woman wants he who can bring back the bacon and kill before being killed.  Protect his tribe...

 We think we are so intelligent and civilized but we are still subject to nature and nature demands reproduction of the fittest and the strong. We women dont like bad guys but our nature demands we seek them out for reproduction and survival of the species..  Hence bad guys get more women. 

So remember ladies that the bad guy may also be bad to you! 

Cheers

 

 



I think this confusion exists in women that bad boys somehow make better hunters, providers, protectors, warriors, and so on. 

 

Somehow there is the confusion that if you are gentle, courteous, have manners, are articulate, and even intelligent, then; you won’t be tough enough to kill the moose, defend the home, protect your children, and so on. 

 

It just is not so.   

 

 

 

RMac

 



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
rmac22
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 809
Posted on Mon, Sep 02, 2013 07:20

Quoting MissMonteCarlo:

Do nice girls finish last?

 

Sarah :-/



No, they are the women that men hope to find to marry. 

 

RMac



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Dakota35
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1229
Posted on Sun, Sep 01, 2013 22:39

Quoting onlyluvmatters:

Just my take on the above conversation......Bad guys go out and hunt the buffalo or mamouth and the chances of his survival are greater than if he is a gentle man. aka 'nice guy'  so naturally the woman wants he who can bring back the bacon and kill before being killed.  Protect his tribe...

 We think we are so intelligent and civilized but we are still subject to nature and nature demands reproduction of the fittest and the strong. We women dont like bad guys but our nature demands we seek them out for reproduction and survival of the species..  Hence bad guys get more women. 

So remember ladies that the bad guy may also be bad to you! 

Cheers

 

 



What about the rare smart bad-azz nice guy that allows the bad guy to kill the "buffalo or mammoth" and then beats the hell out of him and takes it away.  I'm one of those kinds of guys and if we lived in a uncivil world then I'd have a GF.  I'd just find a woman I like, beat the crap out of her BF and take her away and treat her nice. (because I'm a nice guy).  Of course the world doesn't work that way.  I just think women are blind to the evolution of man.  Show me where those "buffalo/mammoth" hunters are in today's world?  In general men are more feminine than ever.  Gender role reversal.  Welcome to the new world...I don't fit. 



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    1 up Bookmark and Share
onlyluvmatters
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1
Posted on Fri, Aug 30, 2013 02:37

Just my take on the above conversation......Bad guys go out and hunt the buffalo or mamouth and the chances of his survival are greater than if he is a gentle man. aka 'nice guy'  so naturally the woman wants he who can bring back the bacon and kill before being killed.  Protect his tribe...

 We think we are so intelligent and civilized but we are still subject to nature and nature demands reproduction of the fittest and the strong. We women dont like bad guys but our nature demands we seek them out for reproduction and survival of the species..  Hence bad guys get more women. 

So remember ladies that the bad guy may also be bad to you! 

Cheers

 

 



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
MissMonteCarlo
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1699
Posted on Sun, Aug 25, 2013 04:55

Do nice girls finish last?

 

Sarah :-/



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Dakota35
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1229
Posted on Mon, Jul 22, 2013 03:41

Quoting rezi1983:

hahahahahahah sorry i apologyse if i offended or insulted u in anyway but i thought u were a woman thas all, i really thought like that as ur nick name fineshes with a letter and in which means in our language grammer when names fineshes by a or e is female and in i and u is male, i apologyse once again, pls am sorry, nice to meet u by the way and thnks for compliments and critics i apriciate them, its my mistake, dont put orlando in middle this is all messed up by both of two of us.



Rezi, I was just joking around with you and included Orlando in it since it is his blog.  Maybe my humor doesn't translate.  I realize there are language barriers.  I've talked to women from Russian and Ukraine for years.  Sometimes the emails can be difficult to read, but I usually get what they are saying.  NO, I'm all man...wait, let me check...yep still there, all man.  LOL  No need to apologize, we are all friends here.  I posted a comment on your profile.  Are you Italian or were your born somewhere else?  I like to learn about people and cultures, your profile is missing some info.


Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 18
Posted on Mon, Jul 22, 2013 02:26

Quoting Dakota35:

Someone help me understand what she is saying???  I'm not Gay if that's what you are implying. :)  Orlando, I'm a rather daring guy...but she's now talking about Italian men and giving my heart...I may not be the best man for this job after all.  I was just thinking it was a hot woman and her friends, now this Italian men stuff has been brought into the mix.  I don't swing that way and it frightens me.  I'll do the James Bond visits Italy thing, but not Gay J Bond.  :)  Orlando, damit say something!!!



hahahahahahah sorry i apologyse if i offended or insulted u in anyway but i thought u were a woman thas all, i really thought like that as ur nick name fineshes with a letter and in which means in our language grammer when names fineshes by a or e is female and in i and u is male, i apologyse once again, pls am sorry, nice to meet u by the way and thnks for compliments and critics i apriciate them, its my mistake, dont put orlando in middle this is all messed up by both of two of us.



0 up Bookmark and Share
Dakota35
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1229
Posted on Sun, Jul 21, 2013 19:04

Quoting rezi1983:

Orlando is so lucky, is helping you finding a heart for you in Italy, in case always u give ur Herat to an Italian man, or yours ache for him?



Someone help me understand what she is saying???  I'm not Gay if that's what you are implying. :)  Orlando, I'm a rather daring guy...but she's now talking about Italian men and giving my heart...I may not be the best man for this job after all.  I was just thinking it was a hot woman and her friends, now this Italian men stuff has been brought into the mix.  I don't swing that way and it frightens me.  I'll do the James Bond visits Italy thing, but not Gay J Bond.  :)  Orlando, damit say something!!!



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 18
Posted on Sun, Jul 21, 2013 07:59

Quoting Dakota35:

Orlando, forget what I just said...I believe, I should first go as a scout to make sure there is no danger.  Kind of like a food taster for the King.  If all is safe then I'll give you a call to come over.  Just watching your back, man. :-)  You can thank me later.



Orlando is so lucky, is helping you finding a heart for you in Italy, in case always u give ur Herat to an Italian man, or yours ache for him?



0 up Bookmark and Share
Dakota35
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1229
Posted on Sun, Jul 21, 2013 03:22

Quoting rezi1983:

Yes indeed, Dakota by the way no need of translator Hun, with me u will be in perfect and amazing company! Kisses


Orlando, forget what I just said...I believe, I should first go as a scout to make sure there is no danger.  Kind of like a food taster for the King.  If all is safe then I'll give you a call to come over.  Just watching your back, man. :-)  You can thank me later.



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 18
Posted on Sun, Jul 21, 2013 01:47

Quoting Dakota35:

Orlando, looks like you have a fan in Italy.  So here's the deal;  I looked at her photos and she has friends.  You and I should start packing today, I'll buy one of those electronic translators and we'll head for Italy.  If the gondola is rocking...well you know how it goes. :-)



Yes indeed, Dakota by the way no need of translator Hun, with me u will be in perfect and amazing company! Kisses



0 up Bookmark and Share
Dakota35
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 1229
Posted on Sat, Jul 20, 2013 20:31

Orlando, looks like you have a fan in Italy.  So here's the deal;  I looked at her photos and she has friends.  You and I should start packing today, I'll buy one of those electronic translators and we'll head for Italy.  If the gondola is rocking...well you know how it goes. :-)



Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 18
Posted on Sat, Jul 20, 2013 11:10

Nice guys think too much, bad boys do to much act



0 up Bookmark and Share
greenkindeyes
Available only
to logged in members

total posts: 73
Posted on Sat, Jul 20, 2013 08:05

Quoting Diana3316:

Greenkindeyes,

 

"men are so fed up they refuse to be vulnerable". 

 

Wow...that is so right!  Some of the stories men tell me about of what women have done to them...frankly I am kinda ashamed for the women.  One man told me, he gave a woman his credit card to go buy a few things for her new apartment....and she spent $20,000....in one day!  She maxed the card out.  Are you kidding me???



That's awful, whow.  My...how does a person have peace and sleep when they act that way?



Unapologetically Feminine

Reply / add comments   Quote   Report abuse    0 up Bookmark and Share
Follow - Email me when people comment