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Do Nice Guys Finish Last? Sort by:
Hhjjhh
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Posted on Sat, Jul 20, 2013 03:17

Nice guys might finish last but, they end to be the most successful 

 



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Diana3316
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Posted on Thu, Jul 18, 2013 08:12

Quoting greenkindeyes:

It saddens me that women have been so self indulged and unfairly allowed to be brats without accountability that men are so fed up they refuse to be vulnerable.

I only respond to kind men and nothing else matters to me.  Give me a good, kind man any day of the week.


Greenkindeyes,

 

"men are so fed up they refuse to be vulnerable". 

 

Wow...that is so right!  Some of the stories men tell me about of what women have done to them...frankly I am kinda ashamed for the women.  One man told me, he gave a woman his credit card to go buy a few things for her new apartment....and she spent $20,000....in one day!  She maxed the card out.  Are you kidding me???



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greenkindeyes
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Posted on Mon, Jul 15, 2013 17:15

It saddens me that women have been so self indulged and unfairly allowed to be brats without accountability that men are so fed up they refuse to be vulnerable.

I only respond to kind men and nothing else matters to me.  Give me a good, kind man any day of the week.



Unapologetically Feminine

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greenkindeyes
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Posted on Sun, Jul 14, 2013 09:13

If it's any consultation, the ego driven role in the hay may be worthy of being a notch on a woman's tiara but it's not as enduring as the memory of just a slow guttural kiss from a mind melding connection from a good man.....lol.



Unapologetically Feminine

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Dakota35
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Posted on Sat, Jul 13, 2013 21:24

Quoting rmac22:

First you are absolutely right.  Examples abound.  One of my friends, a very intelligent person, he was so smitten with a pretty and sweet little girl; a professor’s daughter; he treated her like a fragile, precious, glass doll likely to break at the slightest jostle.  She liked him a lot, but he was beat out by a succession of rough slobs; bad boys.  Why?  He was no fragile wilting flower.  He was big, tough, and could have picked up any one of the succession of slobs and put them upside down in a trash bin.  And they would not have been able to stop him. 

 

 

Why?  First guess.  Girls / Women don’t like to be treated like a fragile, precious, glass doll likely to break at the slightest jostle.   They might say they like that but if so they are fooling themselves and us. 

 

 

The so called sensitive man graze.  I think it is over, I hope so.  What they really want is someone who if a bear is threatening the cave goes out to kill the damn bear.  My friend in the example above would have fit that scenario to a T, but he did not act that way.  Intellectually she could have figured it out, but I am convinced in matters of the heart intellect is not used much.  When it is, it likely comes off as cold and calculating. 

 

 

Confidence.  Women are suckers for confidence.  A man who approaches a women and is all tongue tied because he really cares does not project confidence.  The bad boy, he does not give a damn about anything.  He is not tongue tied because he does not care.  Logically she should go for the former.  I don’t think logic gets into it at all.  A father of a daughter could sort that one out in five seconds.  If daughter doesn’t head him off, he will deal with the bad boy. 

 

 

 

RMac

 



RMac, we are in agreement 100%.  I'll give you another example.  I know this girl/woman that was a former Hooters girl (cute girl).  I never was mean to her but I just told her what I though, and some of that wasn't thinking to highly of her.  She goes out of her way to be friendly to me...even at the expense of pissing off her boyfriend. (It is hilarious)  Yet a friend of mine has always treated her so nice, now she avoids him.  My days of being so caring, nice, sweet and all that other good stuff ended years ago.  It doesn't work unless the woman wants to use you.   And also partly, because I just don't give a damn any more.  If I ever get married then I can pull out the sweet guy card.   Otherwise, it stays lost.  I guess caveman law still applies despite men becoming more feminine and women more masculine.  It's coded in our genetics.

 

Also, guys that can handle themselves (as in beat the crap out of other guys) usually are nicer because they have nothing to prove.  Yet, being to nice to a woman is apparently viewed by her as a weakness.  As women get older, I think they see more clearly. 

 

Another thing that I find myself doing, I give way less attention to a really attractive woman, especially if she acts like she is attractive.  I figure they get enough attention and their beauty has opened doors that would have otherwise been closed.  So why should I add to those good things.  I'd rather give my attention to a woman that hasn't been so lucky in looks.  It is a beautiful thing when a woman is very pretty and has no idea she is pretty. 

 

People want what they can't have...so if you believe that...then never let a woman know that she completely has you.  Always let her know that you can drop her and find another.  Love her with all your heart but don't be a puppy, be a man.  Women are not as fragile as some men think, in fact, I would say many women are tougher than men.  After all, they give birth...I know men that would cry and act like a baby if they had to do such. 



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rmac22
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Posted on Sat, Jul 13, 2013 06:46

Quoting Dakota35:

I can tell you straight up that nice guys do finish last.  I used to be so nice to women, I tried to be so thoughtful, so romantic, try to understand on a individual bases what would make them happy.  I wasn't after sex, my intentions were pure.  But it (I) was a joke, women saw me as a friend but nothing more.  I hated to lose my kindness and consideration, but it was getting me nowhere.  Why should I put a effort into something that women don't even appreciate?  Sure, they will say they appreciate it, but their actions dictate the truth.  I'm still a nice guy, but I just don't care as much.  I love women, but they don't control my world like they used to.  I've never been one to make promises as I'd rather just show action.  I am still the same way.  But men make so many promises to women, promise they cannot keep, pure lies.  Women fall for it and find out when it's to late and they are already in love.

 

Orlando, per your research...perhaps women that seek out bad boys are only looking for sex.  But what started out as seeking sex many times ends up as feeling and a long term relationship for women.  A relationship with the wrong kind of guy.

 

Orlando, your blogs are interesting.  Nothing you blog about bothers me personally.  But you should know that many on this site are already completely aware of the outcome of these research surveys.  Living life tends to teach us.  With that said, even though we may know the outcome, it's good to refresh it in our mind.  Thanks for reminding me why I'm not getting any sex. :-)



First you are absolutely right.  Examples abound.  One of my friends, a very intelligent person, he was so smitten with a pretty and sweet little girl; a professor’s daughter; he treated her like a fragile, precious, glass doll likely to break at the slightest jostle.  She liked him a lot, but he was beat out by a succession of rough slobs; bad boys.  Why?  He was no fragile wilting flower.  He was big, tough, and could have picked up any one of the succession of slobs and put them upside down in a trash bin.  And they would not have been able to stop him. 

 

 

Why?  First guess.  Girls / Women don’t like to be treated like a fragile, precious, glass doll likely to break at the slightest jostle.   They might say they like that but if so they are fooling themselves and us. 

 

 

The so called sensitive man graze.  I think it is over, I hope so.  What they really want is someone who if a bear is threatening the cave goes out to kill the damn bear.  My friend in the example above would have fit that scenario to a T, but he did not act that way.  Intellectually she could have figured it out, but I am convinced in matters of the heart intellect is not used much.  When it is, it likely comes off as cold and calculating. 

 

 

Confidence.  Women are suckers for confidence.  A man who approaches a women and is all tongue tied because he really cares does not project confidence.  The bad boy, he does not give a damn about anything.  He is not tongue tied because he does not care.  Logically she should go for the former.  I don’t think logic gets into it at all.  A father of a daughter could sort that one out in five seconds.  If daughter doesn’t head him off, he will deal with the bad boy. 

 

 

 

RMac

 



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Dakota35
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Posted on Sat, Jul 13, 2013 04:55

Quoting NGL2011:

Dakota, thanks for the help,,sometimes my brain and my fingers don't match up very well !  LOL

 

That Diana, she is a sharp cookie,, little to Liberal,, but sharp none the less !   LOL

 

I could never look overseas, communication is way to important to me, and I'm afraid that would be very difficult. Heck I have a hard time communicating in English.  :)

 

Trust me Liv, I still have Hope !  ;)



"Trust me Liv, I still have Hope !  ;)"  NGL, if you have "Hope" keep her tied up and hands bound, because she keep putting up my photos on another blog. :)



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Diana3316
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Posted on Sat, Jul 13, 2013 00:08

Quoting Liv:  This is so funny but true. The only exception being "does 'nice guy' = 'boring in bed'?". I think in an ideal world most reasonable women want a nice guy who can also 'rock their world' LOL. Is that a mirage? Because if it is, then there is no hope for me!

 

Re:  Nice guys and sex

 

Well….I’m not much of an expert on sex….but it seems to me…that when a woman decides that she is going to have sex, then she wants to ‘get what she come for’!!  And what did she come for???  Great SEX….which is vastly different from making love and obviously can be vastly different depending on the woman.  I do have sympathy for men because they have to figure it out….and it’s never the same with each woman or each time.  But as someone said, men like a challenge.  It seems that instead of setting the bar so low, in that just getting her clothes off is some kind of victory….why not set the bar higher by striving to be her sex god?  I’m not saying that it has to be great every time…but if a man wants to set the hook…..and get what he wants…which is passion….he’s going to have to give her what she wants and needs.

 

Just because a man knows how to flip a woman’s eye lids, doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s not a nice guy.  So no…it’s not a mirage.   A man like that really likes women….and doesn’t bother with judging her morality or how many sexual experiences she has had in the past.  This kind of man is not afraid of competition.  In fact he thrives on it, because it makes him bring his ‘A’ game….and he is challenged in the desire to make sure he’s the BEST… she’s ever known.  No man wants a woman that no other man wants!

 

Great lovers, while they may still have their personal faults…..are not mean or stingy men.  In fact, I think most of them are charming and nice guys.  Unquestionably, a woman’s brain has to be attracted to him before her body ever will be.  Great lovers tend to be pretty much focused on the woman!  All that kind of a man cares about is if he likes/admires/respects/desires the woman she is today and who that person is, standing in front of him right now.  Her past is just that…..the PAST!   All he knows is if he wants her....and if he wants to take her in such a way, that she will belong to him.   It’s all very animalistic in my opinion.  Anything else is just skimmed milk.  *wink*  :))



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Livnlov
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Posted on Fri, Jul 12, 2013 11:20

Quoting NGL2011:

Dakota, thanks for the help,,sometimes my brain and my fingers don't match up very well !  LOL

 

That Diana, she is a sharp cookie,, little to Liberal,, but sharp none the less !   LOL

 

I could never look overseas, communication is way to important to me, and I'm afraid that would be very difficult. Heck I have a hard time communicating in English.  :)

 

Trust me Liv, I still have Hope !  ;)


LOL .... your comment about communication makes me laugh! So, NGL, are you saying that those of us in the UK or Canada cannot communicate in English or what exactly are you implying? Kindly explain before I report you to the Queen of England for trying to diss our all sooo posh 'Queen's English'! LOLOL......or define 'looking abroad' please.

 

NGL, my friend, I'm glad you still have hope....that is the most important primary ingredient.

 

Liv.



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NGL2011
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Posted on Thu, Jul 11, 2013 13:01

Quoting Dakota35:

 

 

I think the word you were looking for is "disgusted"?  Or maybe a better term would be that you are discombobulated by women...and maybe sometimes disgusted. :) 

 

 

 

You know, NGL, years ago...say the 1950s-60s it wasn't like it is now.  Credit has made a lot of losers look good, then they fool women into thinking "they've got it going on".  Way back "when" if you just had a car to drive on a Friday or Sat. night you had a date.  That was before every teen working at MickeyDs could get credit to buy a car. 

 

 

 

Read what Diana wrote.  It will give you a view into the mentality of women...of course everyone is different.  Diana just gave out a HUGE secret. It's not always about looks with women.  You want all the secrets?  Find a way to email me privately and I'll send you something. 

 

 

 

I assume you are seeking a specific type of woman?  I've thought of going over seas.  For years I talked to Russian/Ukraine women thinking they were women of quality.  Us guys are sold that bill of goods by these Russian/Ukraine dating site.  But let me tell you, it's all a bunch of BS.  Florida is full of these women.  Most have met a guy, came over and then left him.  Some guys have horror stories.  I was told very clearly by a FSU woman on this site to never go to Russia to find a match.  The women are very beautiful, some of the most beautiful women in the world...but you'd better be able to provide well for them and keep up...or she's gone.  They will date older men.  I have been told that they are taught from a young age, to better themselves through marriage.  I wonder about Chinese women?  I met one on this site and she seemed nice, but she kept getting angry with me (and correcting my English).  She felt because she is Chinese that she would be limited if she lived in America without a citizenship.

 

 

 

I've come to the conclusion that it would probably be best for me to just find a local girl.  I like communication, I like to be understood, I like for my communication skills to be appreciated.  I mix well with all types...though I don't like women with lose morals.  Doesn't matter to me if she's a Doctor or works at WallyWorld...as long as she's sweet, loyal, and I think she's cute.  Cute is better than pretty for me.  I've been eyeing a pocket girl that works at WallyWorld.  :)

 

 

 

When I look through the profiles on this site, there are many pretty women...model looking photos.  And I hate those photos (look so fake).  I also hate the photos where women look all trashy, drunk, trying to look all party model cool, half dressed (half dressed turns me on, but I don't want them...okay, I want them...but not in a way I need).  What really workds for me is if I see a attractive woman, with nice a few nice decent photos, I really go for cute and petite.  Then, after viewing her photos, I read all of what she wrote.  Sometimes what she wrote is a total turn off...but on a few occasions I've found some really nice "about me" & "about my match" write ups.  Of course me with no picture, I don't get many replies.  But it's all cool, keeps me out of trouble.

 

 

Okay, I've rambled enough...it's 4:30am in the morning so sometimes that happens.



Dakota, thanks for the help,,sometimes my brain and my fingers don't match up very well !  LOL

 

That Diana, she is a sharp cookie,, little to Liberal,, but sharp none the less !   LOL

 

I could never look overseas, communication is way to important to me, and I'm afraid that would be very difficult. Heck I have a hard time communicating in English.  :)

 

Trust me Liv, I still have Hope !  ;)



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jomo1983
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Posted on Wed, Jul 10, 2013 13:58

I'm surprised that anyone felt this topic required research. Of course the bad boys, and bad boys of all stripes, Diana, are the ones that get the girls. There is something deeply imbedded in the X chromosome that is energized by the challenge, enjoys proximity to cavemen and loathes on some level an accomodating man.

 

Of course, women will also divorce their frat-boy/surfer dude for the exact same reasons that they married him. One of the great conundrums of relationships.

 

Orlando, keep up your blogging. Always interesting and very worthwhile.



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Livnlov
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Posted on Wed, Jul 10, 2013 08:58

Quoting Diana3316:

O~

I was going to take exception to how you “extrapolated” the characteristics of the bad boy….generally using unattractive adjectives.  But after considering for a bit, I can see how/why you selected those descriptives.  I’m just going to let it ride and comment on the topic.  Lol

 

There are a great number of varieties of ‘bad boy’ types….from the Rhett Butler type to the abusive brut type.  But perhaps that could be a whole different study topic.

 

Never the less, I think young women like and want sex just as much as young men.  When a young woman meets a guy that rocks her world (pc for great sex)….she’s going to tell ALL her girlfriends about how great he is in the sack.  In a very short time he will have the reputation of being a great lover and every woman in town will be trying to be with him….well….ok…maybe just half the co-eds on campus.  *wink*  The more experience he has….the more confident and comfortable he becomes with women….the more attractive he becomes to women! 

 

The guys that are duds/boring in the bedroom???  Well, they get a reputation too.  lolol


Diana,

 

This is so funny but true. The only exception being "does 'nice guy' = 'boring in bed'?". I think in an ideal world most reasonable women want a nice guy who can also 'rock their world' LOL. Is that a mirage? Because if it is, then there is no hope for me!

 

It is true that spreading the news of a guy's sexual prowess and the ripple effect can be instrumental in the making of a bad boy - so true. I think something like that happened to Charlotte in Sex and City. She had it, then she shared the great news with the other 3 girls who quickly nicknamed this guy Mr. P**** - word went around town about this guy's specialised skill - BOOM! Ladies were lining up for a chance to be with Mr. P for just one moment to experience the joy...LOL....Suffice to say, Charlotte lost him very quickly. LOL!!

 

DAK - Make no mistake that this is some secret - it isn't. Most girls kiss and tell their closest/trusted friends, LOL. What their friends/trusted friends do with that information makes a mountain of a difference to so many other people's lives including the one who kissed and told! Either positively or negatively. Which is why I do not kiss and tell anyone especially not my female friends! If a guy is driving me up the wall, and I am getting pissed off, I could seek guidance from my trusted and closest male friend(s) if I want to keep this guy or I just want to vent him out of my peripheral system and get it over and done with (DAK you know that, don't you?). As for looking abroad, have you tried European Africans or Caribbean ladies? If you haven't, you really are missing a huge and beautifully sweet demographic. Widen your horizon, you never know where you'll find her; or just go for the Wallyworld babe!

 

Liv.



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Livnlov
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Posted on Wed, Jul 10, 2013 06:52

Quoting Dakota35:

Hey NGL,

Then those women that choose the "bad guys" spend 20 years of their life with such guys.  She will take on many of the traits and characteristics of this guy, traits a good guy doesn't want or like.  Then after all the years spent with such a guy, she will wise up.  She starts to see how the good guy is actually the stable, caring, no drama, better life for her (and her children)...guy.  Then she starts trying to find a good nice guy.  At this point she is in many ways damaged goods.  The good guy is in a place in his life where he doesn't need crap or drama, so he's not really interested.  Thus, the good guy doesn't have a woman and the woman that initially chose the bad guy doesn't have a man.  A screwed up cycle.  The good guy then goes out looking for younger women that haven't yet gotten screwed up by the bad boy mind-set.  A younger woman that hasn't been jaded by social pressures.  The problem is that she is young and he is older and that puts pressure on a relationship and many times dooms it to failure.  Then the woman that is finally looking for a nice good guy, gives up her search and settles for a life with a bad guy that has just gotten to old for drama, but still treats her like crap.  That ultimately doesn't work out and the woman is once again single and has gotten older, so it is more difficult for her to find a man, since men are visual first.

 

All this crap when there are guys like you (NGL) and I that would love and care for a woman, treat her with respect and kindness, worry about it when she's not happy, talk for hours to her and just enjoy holding her in our arms.  But now we've gotten older, our testosterone levels have dropped and we just don't give much of a damn any more.  We want to care but it's to big of a fight, to much work, and it's not appreciated anyway...so we just say F it and let life ride, hoping that faith with drop us down a woman that fits what we're seek from out of the sky.  Which we pretty much know, isn't going to happen.  

 

I have never been a "bad boy" as in causing trouble.  I'm the nice guy that if the bad boy gets in my way I can shut him up.  So what does that make me? 

 

 



It makes you a great guy!

 

Stop moaning, DAK! And go out there and get yourself a young nice lass! Have you looked up Sarah...totally intelligent, HOT, nice, sensible, decent, blonde bombshell? I hate to matchmake, but it seems you need some help...LOLOL....I know you're gonna hate me after this LOL! But if it gets you a nice girl, then it is worth it, my dear friend :-).

 

Your analysis sent me ROTFLMAO!!!!! It is soooo sadly TRUE!!! LOL.

 

I can confirm as a woman, and one that is relatively young, very strong, measured and relatively well-behaved, I have never craved a bad guy! NEVER! They do nothing for me....just annoying and boring! If a bad guy ever got around me and played with my emotions (which is highly unlikely as I protect my emotions/heart fiercely until I know who/what I am dealing with), it would be a horribly bumpy ride for him. 

 

GraceIvy and MLeigh put it together very nicely from the good and sensible lady's perspective.

 

NGL - Where have you been? Please do not stop trying. She is out there...you will find her. And I pray real soon!

 

Orlando - I respect you and I personally have no problems with your blogs as long as they are in good measure and not hogging the board. When I am not in my serious mode, you know I mostly like poking fun. Keep posting, but be considerate in your measure. My only advice is I'd like to think that we are all friends on here, but when we block our friends and kick them out of our blogs for expressing their opinion which does not align with ours, we are kinda sending a non-friendly signal to them. I  make my point most respectfully and I hope you do understand, even if you may disagree with me.

 

Liv.



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Dakota35
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Posted on Wed, Jul 10, 2013 02:54

Quoting NGL2011:

Dakota,, you just keep going Brother, your doing a great job expressing the side of the nice guys. I'm so discussed (maybe not the right word but) with the women I meet I don't even try anymore.


 

 

I think the word you were looking for is "disgusted"?  Or maybe a better term would be that you are discombobulated by women...and maybe sometimes disgusted. :) 

 

 

 

You know, NGL, years ago...say the 1950s-60s it wasn't like it is now.  Credit has made a lot of losers look good, then they fool women into thinking "they've got it going on".  Way back "when" if you just had a car to drive on a Friday or Sat. night you had a date.  That was before every teen working at MickeyDs could get credit to buy a car. 

 

 

 

Read what Diana wrote.  It will give you a view into the mentality of women...of course everyone is different.  Diana just gave out a HUGE secret. It's not always about looks with women.  You want all the secrets?  Find a way to email me privately and I'll send you something. 

 

 

 

I assume you are seeking a specific type of woman?  I've thought of going over seas.  For years I talked to Russian/Ukraine women thinking they were women of quality.  Us guys are sold that bill of goods by these Russian/Ukraine dating site.  But let me tell you, it's all a bunch of BS.  Florida is full of these women.  Most have met a guy, came over and then left him.  Some guys have horror stories.  I was told very clearly by a FSU woman on this site to never go to Russia to find a match.  The women are very beautiful, some of the most beautiful women in the world...but you'd better be able to provide well for them and keep up...or she's gone.  They will date older men.  I have been told that they are taught from a young age, to better themselves through marriage.  I wonder about Chinese women?  I met one on this site and she seemed nice, but she kept getting angry with me (and correcting my English).  She felt because she is Chinese that she would be limited if she lived in America without a citizenship.

 

 

 

I've come to the conclusion that it would probably be best for me to just find a local girl.  I like communication, I like to be understood, I like for my communication skills to be appreciated.  I mix well with all types...though I don't like women with lose morals.  Doesn't matter to me if she's a Doctor or works at WallyWorld...as long as she's sweet, loyal, and I think she's cute.  Cute is better than pretty for me.  I've been eyeing a pocket girl that works at WallyWorld.  :)

 

 

 

When I look through the profiles on this site, there are many pretty women...model looking photos.  And I hate those photos (look so fake).  I also hate the photos where women look all trashy, drunk, trying to look all party model cool, half dressed (half dressed turns me on, but I don't want them...okay, I want them...but not in a way I need).  What really workds for me is if I see a attractive woman, with nice a few nice decent photos, I really go for cute and petite.  Then, after viewing her photos, I read all of what she wrote.  Sometimes what she wrote is a total turn off...but on a few occasions I've found some really nice "about me" & "about my match" write ups.  Of course me with no picture, I don't get many replies.  But it's all cool, keeps me out of trouble.

 

 

Okay, I've rambled enough...it's 4:30am in the morning so sometimes that happens.



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lostinthe70s
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Posted on Wed, Jul 10, 2013 01:26

In a perfect world, I prefer a nice man with a tad bit of an edge.



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Diana3316
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Posted on Tue, Jul 09, 2013 23:24

O~

I was going to take exception to how you “extrapolated” the characteristics of the bad boy….generally using unattractive adjectives.  But after considering for a bit, I can see how/why you selected those descriptives.  I’m just going to let it ride and comment on the topic.  Lol

 

There are a great number of varieties of ‘bad boy’ types….from the Rhett Butler type to the abusive brut type.  But perhaps that could be a whole different study topic.

 

Never the less, I think young women like and want sex just as much as young men.  When a young woman meets a guy that rocks her world (pc for great sex)….she’s going to tell ALL her girlfriends about how great he is in the sack.  In a very short time he will have the reputation of being a great lover and every woman in town will be trying to be with him….well….ok…maybe just half the co-eds on campus.  *wink*  The more experience he has….the more confident and comfortable he becomes with women….the more attractive he becomes to women! 

 

The guys that are duds/boring in the bedroom???  Well, they get a reputation too.  lolol



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notveryordinary
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Posted on Tue, Jul 09, 2013 18:38

I think everything mentioned is quite common. Perhaps in my younger days, possibly true. But let's not generalize and assume it is always that way. I know many happy happy couples and myself was not in that kind of relationship. Sometimes everything works out just the way we hope it will.

So, here's hoping..........



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NGL2011
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Posted on Tue, Jul 09, 2013 18:09

Quoting Dakota35:

Hey NGL,

Then those women that choose the "bad guys" spend 20 years of their life with such guys.  She will take on many of the traits and characteristics of this guy, traits a good guy doesn't want or like.  Then after all the years spent with such a guy, she will wise up.  She starts to see how the good guy is actually the stable, caring, no drama, better life for her (and her children)...guy.  Then she starts trying to find a good nice guy.  At this point she is in many ways damaged goods.  The good guy is in a place in his life where he doesn't need crap or drama, so he's not really interested.  Thus, the good guy doesn't have a woman and the woman that initially chose the bad guy doesn't have a man.  A screwed up cycle.  The good guy then goes out looking for younger women that haven't yet gotten screwed up by the bad boy mind-set.  A younger woman that hasn't been jaded by social pressures.  The problem is that she is young and he is older and that puts pressure on a relationship and many times dooms it to failure.  Then the woman that is finally looking for a nice good guy, gives up her search and settles for a life with a bad guy that has just gotten to old for drama, but still treats her like crap.  That ultimately doesn't work out and the woman is once again single and has gotten older, so it is more difficult for her to find a man, since men are visual first.

 

All this crap when there are guys like you (NGL) and I that would love and care for a woman, treat her with respect and kindness, worry about it when she's not happy, talk for hours to her and just enjoy holding her in our arms.  But now we've gotten older, our testosterone levels have dropped and we just don't give much of a damn any more.  We want to care but it's to big of a fight, to much work, and it's not appreciated anyway...so we just say F it and let life ride, hoping that faith with drop us down a woman that fits what we're seek from out of the sky.  Which we pretty much know, isn't going to happen.  

 

I have never been a "bad boy" as in causing trouble.  I'm the nice guy that if the bad boy gets in my way I can shut him up.  So what does that make me? 

 

 


Dakota,, you just keep going Brother, your doing a great job expressing the side of the nice guys. I'm so disgusted (maybe not the right word but) with the women I meet I don't even try anymore.



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Dakota35
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Posted on Mon, Jul 08, 2013 18:02

Quoting NGL2011:

Very well said Dakota, very well said.

 

I've heard tons of stories from women about how bad they get treated, but then they go back for more. Makes no sense to me at all !



Hey NGL,

Then those women that choose the "bad guys" spend 20 years of their life with such guys.  She will take on many of the traits and characteristics of this guy, traits a good guy doesn't want or like.  Then after all the years spent with such a guy, she will wise up.  She starts to see how the good guy is actually the stable, caring, no drama, better life for her (and her children)...guy.  Then she starts trying to find a good nice guy.  At this point she is in many ways damaged goods.  The good guy is in a place in his life where he doesn't need crap or drama, so he's not really interested.  Thus, the good guy doesn't have a woman and the woman that initially chose the bad guy doesn't have a man.  A screwed up cycle.  The good guy then goes out looking for younger women that haven't yet gotten screwed up by the bad boy mind-set.  A younger woman that hasn't been jaded by social pressures.  The problem is that she is young and he is older and that puts pressure on a relationship and many times dooms it to failure.  Then the woman that is finally looking for a nice good guy, gives up her search and settles for a life with a bad guy that has just gotten to old for drama, but still treats her like crap.  That ultimately doesn't work out and the woman is once again single and has gotten older, so it is more difficult for her to find a man, since men are visual first.

 

All this crap when there are guys like you (NGL) and I that would love and care for a woman, treat her with respect and kindness, worry about it when she's not happy, talk for hours to her and just enjoy holding her in our arms.  But now we've gotten older, our testosterone levels have dropped and we just don't give much of a damn any more.  We want to care but it's to big of a fight, to much work, and it's not appreciated anyway...so we just say F it and let life ride, hoping that faith with drop us down a woman that fits what we're seek from out of the sky.  Which we pretty much know, isn't going to happen.  

 

I have never been a "bad boy" as in causing trouble.  I'm the nice guy that if the bad boy gets in my way I can shut him up.  So what does that make me? 

 

 



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NGL2011
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Posted on Mon, Jul 08, 2013 11:37

Quoting Dakota35:

I can tell you straight up that nice guys do finish last.  I used to be so nice to women, I tried to be so thoughtful, so romantic, try to understand on a individual bases what would make them happy.  I wasn't after sex, my intentions were pure.  But it (I) was a joke, women saw me as a friend but nothing more.  I hated to lose my kindness and consideration, but it was getting me nowhere.  Why should I put a effort into something that women don't even appreciate?  Sure, they will say they appreciate it, but their actions dictate the truth.  I'm still a nice guy, but I just don't care as much.  I love women, but they don't control my world like they used to.  I've never been one to make promises as I'd rather just show action.  I am still the same way.  But men make so many promises to women, promise they cannot keep, pure lies.  Women fall for it and find out when it's to late and they are already in love.

 

Orlando, per your research...perhaps women that seek out bad boys are only looking for sex.  But what started out as seeking sex many times ends up as feeling and a long term relationship for women.  A relationship with the wrong kind of guy.

 

Orlando, your blogs are interesting.  Nothing you blog about bothers me personally.  But you should know that many on this site are already completely aware of the outcome of these research surveys.  Living life tends to teach us.  With that said, even though we may know the outcome, it's good to refresh it in our mind.  Thanks for reminding me why I'm not getting any sex. :-)



Very well said Dakota, very well said.

 

I've heard tons of stories from women about how bad they get treated, but then they go back for more. Makes no sense to me at all !



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