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marlena_21
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Posted on Fri, Jun 16, 2006 13:08

Why do people label some women as trophy wives? Is it pure jealously at the fact that they have someone who wants to spoil them? Or that their SO gives them access to their hearts desires? What do ya'll think? I am listening!


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AQHAlover
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Posted on Tue, Jun 20, 2006 11:44

I am young and cute have manners and class . . .hobbies and interests and all of those other things that make me who I am, if in some one else's eyes that makes me a trophy worth having then GREAT. I think that the term Trophy wife derives froma time in which women where "things" that in fact could be won from battle or contest. In a way being battled for is a romantic notion.Understandably there aren't men jousting, in the traditional sense, on here, but in a way they are with their words and thoughts. Just this country girls two cents.


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Blanca_06
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Posted on Sun, Jun 18, 2006 19:11

Marlena, To me a Trophy Wife means much more than the stereo typical definition. She is not always young, ignorant, shop-aholic who spends her days at the spa wasting her husbands' money; it is much more like RiveraRose said - Jacqueline Kennedy to Aristotle Onassis. A wife who has class, title and position to add to the partnership where the man may have made a lot of money but has no social background. She was a good example. Loved her image. Once called a trophy wife; the job was not to be a little uneducated shop-aholic and the spa what is that? She will only see it maybe once a month as volunteer activities and community work take so much time, not to mention organizing dinner parties where the husband receives all the great compliments and glory, raising the children to be strong and well mannered, to be seen and not so heard. Making sure that all is perfection for him or at least come close to it. Making his image look 1000% better than the ones around him. See the trophy wife is not always a beauty based position but it is intellect, challenges, and resourcefulness. Being ready in a heartbeat to travel or be somewhere as you are called by him, making sure that all his needs, wants, and desires are taken care of. The wife is always very loved, cared and desired by such a husband and he knows exactly what he wants and is usually much older than her. A perfect match if he is older, as the older men get they tend to value that partner more and appreciate her for who she is and why she does those special things for him. And on the flip side, some men take the wife as an object. Much younger, extremely gorgeous, to exist and to shine in pictures, but do not ask her much as she might ruin the image. Oh! Yes, also do not forget the Stepford Wives, yara, yara, yara???. Need I say more????????? Not a bad position!!!


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mnsw21
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Posted on Sun, Jun 18, 2006 15:10

I just discovered I was always looking for a purse a nurse and a trophy wife all in one!? Amazing grace! with the perfect indecent proposal to top it all; I should be ashamed of myself...I should feel very guilty too... But it is too early for me to feel so bad...Cause I am not likely to find a wife like this...I'll have plenty of time to feel ashamed and guilty after the wedding...


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Posted on Sun, Jun 18, 2006 12:15

Will, When I was younger, I never wanted to be a trophy wife. Now, I would never want to trade places with one. I am not jealous. When I was 21, the thought of sleeping with someone my dad's age gave me the creeps. Now, I prefer over-40 men, since I am that age myself. I could never sleep with someone young enough to be my son either. What could people this far apart in age have in common?


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just4luvingu
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Posted on Sun, Jun 18, 2006 11:56

A Trophy Wife is a women a man feels proud to have on his arm. She doesn't have to be a pretty young thing. If your man likes you to dress pretty all the time and feels proud to show you off to his friends then in a way that makes you a Trophy wife.


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apropo123
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Posted on Sun, Jun 18, 2006 08:23

Hello... from an ex "trophy" wife. Marlena... I was not spoiled.. I did the spoiling.. Susie.... I was young... sexy... I am not sure, however, I would like to believe so LOL. I married for love because I was naive, still am and still believe in the beauty of a relationship. Scarlet... I worked very hard. I raised my children including running my business. Yes, there was a time I had a nanny, driver, cook etc. but I paid for it. I had the Porsche and the Mercedes when I started dating the father of my children. I learned baking bread, canning, gardening etc. I learned to live on a limited budget and I always was able to increase that budget. I am blessed to have had a mother who also was a hard working, kind, considerate and a pretty "tropy wife". She also married for love,and she was poor.She was very smart and loving. And yes, we had nannies, etc just for the purpose to build up after the war. All the great memories involved my mother the trophy wife, all the funny moments and laughter involved my mother. All the "taking care" was done by my mother. She was the one standing at the train tracks waving good bye when I left after a long weekend to go back to school. She taught me to work hard and rely on myself and that I am thankful for. So you see " the lable " trophy wife" can have different criterias. and why do we need to lable and judge others? Does this make sense?? apropo


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Posted on Sun, Jun 18, 2006 07:21

I find many of the responses to this blog very interesting and it confirms something that I have found to be true over the years about men vs women when it comes to the youth/age thing. At the risk of over generalizing (there are ALWAYS exceptions) - when 40 plus year old woman see an attractive female in her twenties - it often evokes hostility and negative feelings. An attractive younger woman, is easily excluded and resented by woman my age. You can hear the sneers and snickers in the background. She is definitely not welcomed into the "sisterhood". The main exception to this seems to be family members, daughters, nieces, etc. By contrast (once again in MOST cases) when 40 or 50 plus men, meet a younger male, there is often a bonding and even a friendship that is possible. Sure, I wish I had his "pecs" and envy him the attention that he gets from women at times, but I still open up and may enjoy his company (other than a few real jerks we all come across). It's not uncommon for the older men to smile and even look fondly upon the young man while he in turn looks up to the more experienced in the group. It might be because a younger man looks forward to being where the older man is one day and having the life style that comes with it, maybe the same cannot often be said of females. There you go - comments ?


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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 21:14

In my opinion, a trophy wife is a very young, sexy woman whom a middle-aged man desires to be with to impress his friends and business associates. A man secure in his manhood would not dump his 40-something, still attractive wife, the one who bore his children, for some young girl who could be his daughter, but if that makes him feel like "a MAN" so be it. Sad.


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scarletibis24
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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 15:12

I always thought the proverbial "Trophy Wife" was someone meant to be arm candy, but lucked up and married some rich/famous guy. They don't do anything, contribute anything, and if they have kids, they probably just leave them with the nanny, while they prance about at the mall or wherever, doing nothing but spending excessive amounts of money. Some women aren't simply labled as trophy wives, some women *are trophy wives. I can't think of a good example right now, but a good place to look would be some of the couples in Hollywood.


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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 13:00

A trophy wife is someone who has beauty and her husband's money to keep that beauty. They are given money, ststus, and power by their husbands and therefore always look good at parties (hell they spend their days at spas not working). They may or may not tend to their husbands sexual needs and can rarely hold down a serious conversation but THEY LOOK GOOD and that is all the man wants.


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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 10:38

If you read my profile, you'll see that I openly state I am looking for someone that "others may consider a trophy wife - but I wouldn't". My so called trophy would not be anything like what "imani2006" is talking about. I prefer "riverarose's" idea of a Jacqueline Kennedy to my Aristotle Onassis. The term "trophy wife" (or girlfriend) likely means something different to many people. From my perspective it's describes a relationship that "seems" out of balance. Based on her looks and his looks, you can't see why they are together. Most then assume, it must be money. To me, it's a matter of trading off the different qualities that we each have, in exchange for those that we may be lacking but can find in our mate. Typically, HE has age, success, money (which often comes with it), life experience, business acumen, community recognition, maybe power, maybe fame. SHE on the other hand has youth, vitality, beauty, fitness, energy, optimism, enthusiasm and a magic quality of excitement. Is it a matter of opposites attract? - or - gold digger and dirty old man? - or just two people making the most of their strengths and weaknesses?


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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 08:01

I recently turned 50 and have been divirced for a little over two years. During that time I have dated women ranging in age from late twenties to high forties. My X was 4 years older by the way. These women were introduce by friends as well as chance encounters and through cyberspace. Probably in equal proportions. All have been attractive, physically at least. I have found that the older women generally are very spiteful and vindictive, usually due to perceived wrongs committed in the past. I have spent many an hour listening , with a smile plastered on my face, as the male species is blasted. As I try to differentiate myself and point out there are some good guys and not to lose faith, the usual response is, every guy says that. This has led me to enjoy the encounters with, usually younger and less jaded women. The younger women often have been victim of "players"their own or similar age and as such are looking for more mature men. We all have bad experiences, trials and tribulations in our lives. But what shapes us as people is how we react and learn from those experiences. It takes two to Tango. No one wants to be around someone who points the finger at everyone except themselves for the predicament they find themselves in. Take ownership of your own problems and smile. You'll be amazed at the results.


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Imani2006
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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 00:58

The stereotypical "trophy wife" is one who spends more time shopping, looking in the mirror, and worrying about making her spa appointment than doing anything else. She probably looks like a million bucks, but hardly has a brain in her head. She also probably doesn't have kids, and if she does, you can be sure you will see her in her J. Lo track suit, uber expensive running shoes, and Tiffany jewelry, as she pushes the kids in the stroller(Remember, I am talking stereotypically here, people!) I know that doesn't apply to everyone, however, the issue with the idea of a Trophy Wife is not necessarily what these woman are given by their husbands, but by the fact that they're usually chosen on looks alone so that they make their husbands look even better, instead of choosing a compatible significant other. These are usually the women that are the reasons for prenups because they're there to help spend the money, not earn it. I guess that's why a lot of people do not have respect (or even harbor anger/hatred) for these women.


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RivieraRose
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Posted on Sat, Jun 17, 2006 00:46

A trophy wife is a wife as Jaqueline Kennedy was to Aristotle Onasis. It is a wife who has class, title and position to add to the partmership where the man may have made a lot of money but has no social background. A trophy wife can also be said of the very young and beautiful wife (what some might call a bimbo), of a man more than twice her age. It says to the world in general - 'Look at me - Isn't she gorgeous and I'm still up-to-it!' If you get my meaning (wink-wink). Riviera Rose.


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