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Posted on Sun, Apr 27, 2014 19:08

It's hard to define loss; losing a penny that causes no concern. Is that a loss?

Not having to go to work. Is that a loss?

Putting down a loyal, loving, protective canine, who was steadfast, silent, and being devoured by a malignant tumor. Is that a loss?

Telling a parent it's okay to let go: I'll be okay; we are all okay. Is that loss?

Losing a spouse, a life-long companion for over 40 years. Is that loss?

 

In this throw-away society, it is hard to differentiate loss from gone, get another. Everything is replacable. Kids get new parents, toys are tossed and new ones bought, cars, homes, boats. It all changes, and change keeps life going.

 

If we believe we'll see lost loved ones, is it a loss when they die? Or, are we to continue until we die and join them? 



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rmac22
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Posted on Sat, May 03, 2014 08:56

 

Re -- Does the grieving for a particular anything end?

 

 

 

I could attempt to answer that question, but anything I can say in a few words would not be complete and would be way too personal. 

 

 

 

I would suggest you pick up a copy of Helen Fitzgerald’s book, The Mourning Handbook.  It covers all sorts of grief. 

 

 

 

There are many books on the subject, some good and some dismal.  Helen’s is one of the best, my opinion. 

 

 

 



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Posted on Thu, May 01, 2014 17:15

Does the grieving for a particular anything end?

 

Easymantolove, Thank you for the story. I pick up pennies too, and I've seen others pass them by, as if a penny didn't have the value to merit ownership. It's all a matter of perspective, I suppose.

 

 



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rmac22
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Posted on Wed, Apr 30, 2014 21:22

 

We all grieve differently, because we are all different.  The differences do not necessarily mean we loved less or more.  Some people do not cry at all. Others weep buckets.  Having known examples of both, I know that each were truly grieving.

 



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rmac22
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Posted on Wed, Apr 30, 2014 20:55

easymantolove, I appreciate your detailed comment.  I don't disagree.  It is a matter of perspective.  I always pick up pennies if I see them.  One of the few times ones is paid for doing exercises.  For all of that I pick up nickels, dimes, and one hundred dollar bills.  Yes it has happened. 

 

Still, compared to the others she mentioned, it is a very very small loss.           



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Posted on Wed, Apr 30, 2014 10:05

Thank you for commenting. 

Is loss only loss when it matters to the one seen as having lost something? For example, when a person, who doesn't like dogs, takes his to the animal shelter, and is happy the dog is out of his life, there is no sense of loss. Therefore, there is no loss, right? It's all a matter of thinking? or caring? or something? I know you'd probably say a person who doesn't like dogs shouldn't get any in the first place, and I agree. 

 

I'm just trying to get a handle on loss and the different variations it takes, so that competent people can matter-of-factly say that each person grieves differently. Is the difference because of the personal perception of loss and how the loss impacts the losing person's life?

 

 

 



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rmac22
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Posted on Tue, Apr 29, 2014 20:02

The penny is just a little loss.  The others are huge.



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